Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

228 – Thinkin’ Shorts

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which it still sucks to be a Rasputin; John Romita Jr. has a solid, if muscular, grasp of anatomy; Jay and Miles are better exes than Forge and anyone; and Cannonball’s many younger siblings have almost prepared him for running X-Force.

X-PLAINED:

  • Peters Parker
  • The Merry X-Men Holiday Special
  • Comic book release schedules vs. J&MXPtXM
  • Uncanny X-Men #301-302
  • Trevor F**king Fitzroy, possibly the worst Upstart
  • Comics Code Authority closeting versus real-life closeting
  • 21st Century Torture Devices
  • Risky mood fonts
  • Robert’s Rules of Upstart Order (this week)
  • Gamesmaster vs. the Isolationist
  • Shinobi Shaw: Good At Sex
  • Russian tragedy (more, again)
  • Charles Xavier and his poor decisions
  • Shi’ar tech support
  • Pants and villainy
  • Racist jerks vs. rhetorical questions
  • TIME PARADOX
  • Weirdly specific contingencies
  • Piotr Rasputin and his justified fury
  • X-Force #24
  • Meaningless (but fun!) timestamps
  • The Friends of Humanity (who are not our friends)
  • Rusty and Skids’ latest arrest
  • Disappointed Dad Sam Guthrie
  • Action vs. public perception
  • Vinz Clortho
  • Domino’s continuing quest to figure out what exactly an X-Force is
  • The dramatic return of… well, you know
  • Spacesuit logistics
  • Numerical universe designations
  • Plastic Warlock

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8 comments

  1. I LOVE SHINOBI SO MUCH, HE’S THE BEST CHARACTER like ok he’s terrible representation but HES SO DELIGHTFULLY ABSURD

    And your voice/lines for him are THE BEST!

  2. I got that Warlock figure when it first came out and have had it standing in my living room ever since! 🙂 And it was such a terrific, if odd, wave. Warlock (Who didn’t look like that any more) with Douglock option, a beautiful Magik figure (who hadn’t been around in over 10 years) , and a nifty Wolfsbane (sadly, only in her wolfgirl form)

    https://66.media.tumblr.com/b598d1c1a60b333c7293af1693668fbc/tumblr_np631fPnqN1refsh5o2_1280.jpg

    Which left only Karm and Mirage from the original line up who never got figures.

    I made my own Doug of course, so he and Warlock could go together 🙂

    https://66.media.tumblr.com/011fc443f9b2ffd9a07064cf65ce79cd/tumblr_na3pr6xFWz1qhuyzgo1_1280.jpg

    and he still looks pretty good against the new Warlock (Who I confess I bought off e-bay as a set, rather than have to buy all the individual figures. 🙂

    https://66.media.tumblr.com/8f0ec6b49c01a58f385cef2ffe68e775/tumblr_inline_on0nzd3IK81qgsm0y_1280.jpg

    Oh, and in case you wonder about the joyous creativity of superhero geeks, then check this out!

    https://www.ebay.com/itm/LEGO-Custom-New-Mutants-Cypher-Marvel-Super-heroes-minifigures/112857987036

    The face is reversible, so you can have ordinary Doug or Douglock! 🙂

  3. Also just have to say that “Spooling” is an ideally horrific way to stop those who can teleport or move at superspeed (like Selene) since, IIRC, the idea is that it starts teleporting you from your head and it travels down your body, reintegrating you almost immediately, but the next wave starts before the first has finished moving down your body, so there is no moment when at least _part_ of you isn’t being spooled, leaving you no moment when you are fully intact to teleport or speed away.

    ICK!!!

  4. Maybe the parents Bishop just had very different opinions about names, and they decided that one of them could name each kid.

  5. Is Sam’s status as not-Xternal confirmed by his having Joshie? IIRC Sam was told that Xternals couldn’t have children.

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