Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: Mortimer Toynbee

As Mentioned in Episode 530 – Not for Beginners

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Dig that Christopher Shy cover! (New X-Men #149)
Magneto was technically right, the best kind of right. (New X-Men #149)
Dick move. (New X-Men #149)
Hindsight. (New X-Men #149)
Hell, yeah! (New X-Men #149)
These issues are so full of great hero moments. (New X-Men #149)
I am pretty sure that they are not a thing. (New X-Men #149)
This seems… unlikely. (New X-Men #149)
Dang, Phoenix! (New X-Men #150)
HECK YEAH BEAK! (New X-Men #150)
Right into the gutter! (New X-Men #150)
You’d think that telepaths could use the same line of approach, but I guess not? (New X-Men #150)
Aw, they’re so heroic. (New X-Men #150)
Well, shit. (New X-Men #150)
The graffiti absolutely sends me. (New X-Men #150)
NEXT EPISODE: The future!

LINKS & FURTHER MUTATIONS

530 – Not for Beginners

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Illustration by David Wynne

In which we remain frustrated with Morrison’s Magneto; Esme Cuckoo’s hat game is lacking; and the status quo dies with Jean Grey.

X-PLAINED:

  • Dubious X-relationships
  • Some excellent songs from an excellent show
  • New X-Men #149-150
  • Various atrocities and catastrophes
  • The resistance, such as it is
  • Magneto’s limits
  • A rebirth
  • Neutron warheads
  • The cavalry
  • Yet another death of Magneto
  • Yet another death of Jean Grey
  • A peculiar epilogue
  • A legacy of retcons
  • A miasma of bleakness and futility
  • The Xorn retcon
  • Disability in “Planet X”
  • Miracles of Magnetism

NEXT EPISODE: The future!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 497 – Stranger Things

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Astra: shows up for two pages, is a hilarious jerk, refuses to elaborate, leaves. (X-Men Forever #4)
Seriously, there’s a name for the linked-circles-phone-call-thing, right? (X-Men Forever #4)
Getcher Lava Lamp Babies! Three fer the price o’ two! (X-Men Forever #4)
Science is making me feel uncomfortable… (X-Men Forever #4)
Anyway, here’s the history of literally everything. (X-Men Forever #4)
In the future, we will all look more like we do in the movies! (X-Men Forever #5)
Oof, right in the bobbies. (X-Men Forever #5)
It’s Jean’s alternate-alternate-future daughter! (X-Men Forever #5)
“I could defeat you with a single twitch of my left mustache.” (X-Men Forever #6)
“How do I get out of this conversation gaaahhhh he just keeps talking I do NOT want to hear any more about cryptocurrency” (X-Men Forever #6)
In which the art reaches for the stars. (X-Men Forever #6)
A day in the life of an information technology professional. (X-Men Forever #6)
Toad 2.0! Or like, 7.0 if you count all the inconsistencies in his past depictions. (X-Men Forever #6)
Mystique 2.0! But if the first X-Men movie crossed over with Tron. (X-Men Forever #6)
In case you’re wondering, the Stranger’s mustache was already like that even before he got punched in the nose. (X-Men Forever #6)
Toad, as is often the case, has learned nothing. (X-Men Forever #6)
Next time: X-Force gets even more x-treme!

497 – Stranger Things

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In which Prosh’s plans sort of come to fruition; we do not know very much about movies; Iceman dies (but is fine); The Stranger gets around; and Toad learns nothing.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Stranger
  • X-Men Forever #4-6
  • Prosh (more) (again)
  • The story so far
  • Astra (again)
  • The Black Womb Project
  • Toad’s secret origins, possibly
  • Fashion
  • Hazard
  • Amanda Mueller (a bit)
  • Anguirus
  • The end of human civilization
  • Foreshadowing
  • A dramatic reveal
  • Several makeovers
  • Darth Toad
  • Fighting arenas / community theaters

NEXT EPISODE: Mystique reassembles the Brotherhood!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

 

As Mentioned in Episode 496 – Time After Time

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A motley crew if we ever did see one! (X-Men Forever #1)
Say hello to our favorite ancient and benevolent hood ornament, Prosh! (X-Men Forever #1)
Prosh makes some friends. (X-Men Forever #1)
Remember this guy? No? You’re not familiar with Classic X-Men backup stories? Then… good luck. (X-Men Forever #1)
I am trading in my car right now. (X-Men Forever #1)
Prosh x-plains… pretty much everything. (X-Men Forever #1)
Raven Darkholme, making the hard choices. (X-Men Forever #2)
Judgment War reference! Alert! We have a Judgment War reference! (X-Men Forever #2)
If looks could kill… Half the population of Earth would be dead. (X-Men Forever #2)
Legion x-plains the Age of Apocalypse. (X-Men Forever #2)
Fast Travel Mode is weird. (X-Men Forever #2)
This is a very Marvel Comics moment. (X-Men Forever #3)
Things probably don’t get more complicated than this, right? (X-Men Forever #3)
The Snowman Era! (X-Men Forever #3)
Silver Age gotta Silver Age. (X-Men Forever #3)
NEXT TIME: Things do get more complicated.

496 – Time After Time

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In which Prosh assembles a peculiar team; the cosmic forces are somewhat paranoid; Mystique gets shit done; and we are very into the concept of Toadland.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Black Womb Project
  • X-Men Forever #1-3
  • Prosh
  • Several custom-grown people
  • A motley crew of mutants (and one human)
  • Cataclysm keys
  • The assassination of Graydon Creed
  • Several poignant reunions
  • The cosmic construction worker (Death)
  • Why the Phoenix Force chose Jean Grey
  • How much continuity is too much continuity
  • Pyro’s romance novels

NEXT EPISODE: The rest of the series!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 354 – The Touch of Magneto

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Elektra is… complicated. (Wolverine #104)
Where babies come from. (Wolverine #104)
This is actually how most Wolverine stories start. (Wolverine #105)
AWWWWWW. (Wolverine #105)
Ewwwwww. (Wolverine #105)
Stick in a nutshell. (Wolverine #105)
Chris Bachalo, man. Chris Bachalo. (Generation X #19)
They’re not Artie and Leech; but they’re kinda Artie and Leech. (Generation X #19)
SURE WHY NOT (Generation X #19)
Oh, buddy. You tried. (Generation X #19)
You also tried. (Generation X #19)
NEXT WEEK: HAWK TALK!
NEXT EPISODE: Tie-ins!

354 – The Touch of Magneto

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Onslaught is a party that goes on way too long; we are grateful that the Hand is mostly someone else’s problem; there’s always time to get hosed down by firemen; and Emma Frost should never, under any circumstances, cook.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Golden Archer
  • Wolverine #104-105
  • Generation X #18-19
  • Portions of Elektra’s deal
  • Stick
  • Wolverine’s nose
  • Gateway and Onslaught
  • Several flashbacks
  • The Onslaught goblin
  • Retcons and character accountability
  • A wet open
  • A somewhat atypical plane flight
  • Toad by way of Chris Bachalo
  • The mysterious DL
  • Emma’s Montreal mansion and its staff
  • Cooking with Emma Frost
  • Quasi-benevolent mind control
  • Surgeon
  • A bonus Shadowcat power
  • Digital invisibility

NEXT WEEK: Hawk Talk

NEXT EPISODE: Onslaught tie-ins!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 195 – Johnny Got His Robot Arm

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
LOOK AT ALL THOSE POUCHES. (X-Force #8)
And now for something completely different. (X-Force #8)
Fun fact: You can drop this dialogue into almost any panel involving Cable and at least one other character, and it’ll still work. (X-Force #8)
On one hand: Mignola is great. On the other hand: I have some questions about the decision to just straight-up draw Garrison Kane as Marlon Brando. (X-Force #8)
Aw, A.I.M., you wacky kids. (X-Force #8)
Cable’s sense of drama is ON POINT. (X-Force #8)
Domino is pretty genre-aware. (X-Force #9)
Not gonna lie: I dig Liefeld’s take on Blob. (X-Force #9)
If you weren’t imagining Feral’s line in the voice of a 10-year-old Danny Tamberelli, congratulations: you are now. (X-Force #9)
‘Kay. (X-Force #9)
And that, kids, is why balloon placements matter. (I mean, there are a lot of other reasons, too. But this is one of them.) (X-Force #9)
Stryfe’s armor doesn’t just have nipples. Stryfe’s armor has FOUR nipples. (X-Force #10)
Nothing is okay about this picture. (X-Force #10)
Speaking of likenesses, remember the time Cannonball was David Bowie? (X-Force #10)
NEXT EPISODE: Excalibur vs. the Anti-Phoenix!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

195 – Johnny Got His Robot Arm

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Jay may have Stockholm syndrome; Nick Fury is objectively sillier than G. W. Bridge; we get a brief artistic reprieve; Cable’s legal expertise does not extend to trademarks; our favorite Ship returns; Miles’s grandmother calls it like it is; Sauron is bad at taxonomy; and Garrison Kane is basically a very violent Inspector Gadget.

X-PLAINED:

  • Brother Mutant
  • X-Force #8-10
  • X-Force (again)
  • A protracted flashback
  • The Wild and/or Six Pack
  • A heist
  • A trap
  • Yet more Ed Wood references
  • A future
  • The Professor (Ship)
  • Gratuitous face shadows
  • A mystery
  • Cable casting
  • Several misplaced word balloons
  • The logistics of tentacle arms
  • The High Lords (Externals)
  • Michael Bay’s Johnny Got His Gun
  • General Clark and his diving suit
  • Good Magneto stories
  • How to get your dad into X-Men

NEXT EPISODE: Excalibur vs. the Anti-Phoenix!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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