Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

330 – Suddenly, Ninjas

13 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | RSS

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which the podcast turns seven; Matt has officially edited half the podcast; a lot of things are made by metal; Doctor Strange is a big weirdo; Gambit is a scoundrel, not a villain; Wolverine goes goth; Onslaught could probably use a better herald; Bishop fires two guns whilst going aaaaaaa; and we commit to making what sense we can of Onslaught.

X-PLAINED:

  • How Betsy got her body back
  • Several simultaneous anniversaries
  • Uncanny X-Men #329-330
  • X-Men #50
  • Some ninja bullshit
  • A lot of less-benign-than-it-looks racism
  • Excellent use of a neon sign
  • An odd couple
  • The evolution of art tools
  • Steam vs. metal
  • Gomurr the Ancient
  • The Ebon Vein
  • Catastrophic magic
  • Our favorite iterations of Doctor Strange
  • The Crimson Dawn
  • How one becomes Gomurr the Ancient
  • Tar (Proctor of the Crimson Dawn)
  • Post (Herald of Onslaught)
  • An entity who may or may not be Onslaught
  • Continuity party tricks
  • Survivors of the Age of Apocalypse

NEXT EPISODE: Brood X!

The visual companion to this episode will be up later this week!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 329 – Scheming and Argument

Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Same cover, different week. (Excalibur #94)
Same cover, different week. (Excalibur #94)
Rahne "Aleph from Global Frequency" Sinclair. (Excalibur #94)
Rahne “Aleph from Global Frequency” Sinclair. (Excalibur #94)
Sorry. I just can't accept this as Tangerine. (Excalibur #94)
Sorry. I just can’t accept this as Tangerine. (Excalibur #94)
He could totally have rocked the swim cap, though. (Excalibur #94)
He could totally have rocked the swim cap, though. (Excalibur #94)
Ew, they're all goopy. (Excalibur #94)
Ew, they’re all goopy. (Excalibur #94)
Well, damn. (Excalibur #94)
Well, damn. (Excalibur #94)
We call that a "Muir Hello." (X-Man #12)
We call that a “Muir Hello.” (X-Man #12)
It also goes PING! (X-Man #12)
It also goes PING! (X-Man #12)
Okay: That is legitimately cool. (X-Man #12)
Okay: That is legitimately cool. (X-Man #12)
The actual tagline of Squeezits(TM) was "Squeeze the fun out of it." I swear to g-d I'm not making this up. (X-Man #12)
The actual tagline of Squeezits(TM) was “Squeeze the fun out of it.” I swear to g-d I’m not making this up. (X-Man #12)
Look at those mid '90s computer graphics! (Excalibur #95)
Look at those mid ’90s computer graphics! (Excalibur #95)
Moira doesn't give a fuck if she's not your real mom; she's grounding you anyway. (Excalibur #95)
Moira doesn’t give a fuck if she’s not your real mom; she’s grounding you anyway. (Excalibur #95)
Oh, Rory. Buddy. (Excalibur #95)
Oh, Rory. Buddy. (Excalibur #95)
This is also roughly how it feels to read like 20 years of X-Men in a sitting. (Excalibur #95)
This is also roughly how it feels to read like 20 years of X-Men in a sitting. (Excalibur #95)
What Excalibur's thinking about. (Excalibur #95)
What Excalibur’s thinking about. (Excalibur #95)
NEXT EPISODE: The herald of Onslaught; but also this fashion situation.
NEXT EPISODE: The herald of Onslaught; but also this fashion situation.

329 – Scheming and Argument

15 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | RSS

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Nate Grey has the soul of a man in a mesh shirt; Black Air is somehow even worse than you thought it was; Hulk does not want to be x-treme teen from alternate dimension; we are excited as hell for the upcoming Frasier/Ewing Gamma Flight; and Moira MacTaggert is (sometimes) the adult we need.

X-PLAINED:

  • Nate Grey’s (possible) demon zombie baby
  • What Excalibur’s been up to lately
  • Excalibur #94-95
  • X-Man #12
  • Yet another take on roughly the same dark future
  • Dark-future disambiguation
  • Bangs
  • The Black Wall
  • Leather vs. vinyl
  • Sentinels pooping sentinels
  • Nate Grey (more) (again)
  • Gamma Flight
  • Excessively silly diagnostic technology
  • Squeezits(TM)
  • A minor intervention
  • X-characters most likely to lead a successful book club
  • Warlock on Krakoa

NEXT EPISODE: The Herald of Onslaught (for real, this time, we promise)!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

HAWK TALK – Doctor Internet

16 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | RSS

This would usually be a skip week, but the world is still being a jerk, so we made you a bonus, entirely unedited, and almost entirely off-topic episode. This time, we talked about the Internet.

Topics, roughly:

  • Blazing fast 28.8 Kbps dial-up
  • AOL CDs
  • Final Fantasy, MIDI-style
  • Angelfire vs. Carrd
  • The Gaming Intelligence Agency
  • The Brunching Shuttlecocks
  • The finest memes of the early 2000s
  • Chaos
  • Social media, as explained by Jay
  • Social media, as baffles Miles
  • Podcasts vs. the Internet

As Mentioned in Episode 328 – Single Blue Male

Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
It's not baseball, but it'll do! (X-Men #48)
It’s not baseball, but it’ll do! (X-Men #48)
It's rough to be Bishop. (X-Men #48)
It’s rough to be Bishop. (X-Men #48)
The extra arms make it extra funny. (X-Men #48)
The extra arms make it extra funny. (X-Men #48)
*Rimshot* (X-Men #48)
*Rimshot* (X-Men #48)
Dark Beast X-Plains Bishop. (X-Men #48)
Dark Beast X-Plains Bishop. (X-Men #48)
Bishop, that's flirting. (X-Men #49)
Bishop, that’s flirting. (X-Men #49)
"Bishop with Kittens" should be a thing. (X-Men #49)
“Bishop with Kittens” should be a thing. (X-Men #49)
This one's for Douglas Wolk. (X-Men #49)
This one’s for Douglas Wolk. (X-Men #49)
Never trust anybody. (X-Men #49)
Never trust anybody. (X-Men #49)
Except by the time it happens, they look way more alike. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Except by the time it happens, they look way more alike. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Hank McCoy was an objectively kind of terrible child. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Hank McCoy was an objectively kind of terrible child. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
This would be so fun to climb around! (X-Men Unlimited #10)
This would be so fun to climb around! (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Hank, buddy, no. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Hank, buddy, no. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Honestly, I'd prefer a toaster. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Honestly, I’d prefer a toaster. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
What the HELL, dude? (X-Men Unlimited #10)
What the HELL, dude? (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Time to face the... nope. I'm not gonna do it. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
Time to face the… nope. I’m not gonna do it. (X-Men Unlimited #10)
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, MCCOY! (X-Men Unlimited #10)
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, MCCOY! (X-Men Unlimited #10)
NEXT EPISODE: X-Man vs. Excalibur!
NEXT EPISODE: X-Man vs. Excalibur!

328 – Single Blue Male

19 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | RSS

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Sam Guthrie will take all your money; Gambit has exceptionally poor judgment; having friends who are couples means getting to be the big spoon AND the little spoon; Hank McCoy is the agrarian Rube Goldberg; and there are a lot of ways to appreciate a comic.

X-PLAINED:

  • Several colors of Beast
  • X-Men #48-49
  • X-Men Unlimited #10
  • The Floating Super Hero Poker Game
  • Large hands
  • Various refugees from the Age of Apocalypse
  • Surge(TM)
  • Pam Greenwood (Fatale)
  • Many gratuitous murders
  • Iconic runs we’re not into
  • Generations of teen X-Men

NEXT WEEK: Hawk talk!

NEXT EPISODE: Nate Grey vs. Excalibur!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 326 – The Sounds of Gravity

2 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
"My son murdered me and all I got was this cool scar." (X-Force #49)
“My son murdered me and all I got was this cool scar.” (X-Force #49)
Alas, poor Stansfield. (X-Force #49)
Alas, poor Stansfield. (X-Force #49)
I think we've all been on that visit home. (X-Force #49)
I think we’ve all been on that visit home. (X-Force #49)
Aw, this guy. I've missed him. (X-Force #49)
Aw, this guy. I’ve missed him. (X-Force #49)
Look at all that cover! (X-Force #50)
Look at all that cover! (X-Force #50)
Go, team! (X-Force #50)
Go, team! (X-Force #50)
Correction: not actually a two-page spread. (X-Force #50)
Correction: not actually a two-page spread. (X-Force #50)
Sure, why not? (X-Force #50)
Sure, why not? (X-Force #50)
"Remember when we read all those comics?" (X-Force #50)
“Remember when we read all those comics?” (X-Force #50)
That is an unsettlingly good home haircut. (X-Force #51)
That is an unsettlingly good home haircut. (X-Force #51)
NO. (X-Force #51)
NO. (X-Force #51)
One for the reaction files. (X-Force #51)
One for the reaction files. (X-Force #51)
NEXT EPISODE: A tale of two Beasts!
NEXT EPISODE: A tale of two Beasts!

327 – The Sounds of Gravity

26 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | RSS

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which nobody’s ages ever make sense; Sebastian Shaw catches up on villain speeches; nobody puts Louise Simonson in a corner; Tabitha Smith has a bad day; Gambit and Bat Manuel have a lot in common; and Warpath outruns Adam X.

X-PLAINED:

  • X-Force #49-51
  • Haircuts
  • The return off Sebastian Shaw
  • Stansfield
  • A series of kidnappings
  • Solar-powered superpowers
  • Attempted murder
  • Memories
  • Cable as an audience surrogate
  • Tabitha’s new codename
  • The first Tick live-action series
  • Warpath’s running speed
  • Risqué
  • What gravity sounds like
  • X-leisure activities
  • Magneto’s human name/s

NEXT EPISODE: A Tale of Two Beasts

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 326 – Son of a Gun

Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Fun times with holograms! (X-Factor #119)
Fun times with holograms! (X-Factor #119)
Oh, THAT guy. (X-Factor #119)
Oh, THAT guy. (X-Factor #119)
If I had a dollar for every date that ended this way... (X-Factor #119)
If I had a dollar for every date that ended this way… (X-Factor #119)
Sir, your gun appears to be several cardboard boxes. (X-Factor #120)
Sir, your gun appears to be several cardboard boxes. (X-Factor #120)
Well, that's going to be a problem. (X-Factor #120)
Well, that’s going to be a problem. (X-Factor #120)
Okay, but seriously, why is Roma in this, again>? (X-Factor #121)
Okay, but seriously, why is Roma in this, again>? (X-Factor #121)
OH SNAP (X-Factor #121)
OH SNAP (X-Factor #121)

326 – Son of a Gun

20 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | RSS

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which it’s hard to be a hologram; the Internet is terrible and you should probably avoid it; we have no idea how Naze is still alive; this is not your mom’s Adversary (if your mom is Fall of the Mutants); Forge is an order muppet; and Sabretooth is not a great addition to most teams.

X-PLAINED:

  • Skrulls in American history
  • X-Factor’s attrition rate
  • The spirit spell (again)
  • The Adversary (again)
  • X-Factor #119-121
  • Hypercolor(TM) t-shirts
  • Oblivion vs. masturbation
  • Mark Trail (more) (again)
  • Forge’s complicated relationship with magic
  • The death of X-Factor
  • Several retcons
  • The resurrection of X-Factor
  • (Mis)representation of indigenous cultures in X-books
  • Jim Jaspers vs. the Adversary
  • The spirit spell (YET AGAIN)
  • The Feron of X-Factor
  • Val ‘n’ Victor
  • Dubious use of technology
  • A red herring
  • The lingering spectre of Days of Future Past
  • Our tech issues
  • Reasonable accommodations at the Xavier School

NEXT EPISODE: Cable vs. X-Force

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!