Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

As Mentioned in Episode 280 – Business-Casual Basilisk

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Agent Coulson of Earth-1218 is mostly in it for the belly rubs.
What you see is what you get; and what you get is a large man with large guns and large feelings. (Bishop #1)
The gravitas of the X.S.E. is somewhat undercut by the fact that Bishop’s gun very clearly uses Nerf ammo. (Bishop #1)
You see what I mean about the shirt, right? (Bishop #1)
Do you think the other future criminals made fun of Mountjoy for not wearing a bunch of neon or having a mullet? (Bishop #1)
Bishop X-plains Mountjoy. (Bishop #1)
This effect is so creepy! (Bishop #1)
It’s okay, buddy. We’ve all been there. Sort of. Not really. (Bishop #2)
The utter disconnect between the expressions in this one is such a good detail. (Bishop #2)
TFW your holographic sister will not sit like a normal person on your futuristic bladed motorcycle. (Bishop #2)
Additional evidence against Hancock being Cyclops: he probably wouldn’t imply that his optic blasts generate heat. (Bishop #3)
Mountjoy is everyone! (Bishop #4)
NEXT EPISODE: Callasantos family reunion!

280 – Business-Casual Basilisk

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which the future is not great at codenames; spot foil is cool as hell; Mountjoy is bafflingly business-themed; Bishop goes full Point Break; Jean Grey and Lorna Dane should absolutely be friends; and Jay & Miles are heading to ECCC 2020!

X-PLAINED:

  • Lola vs. L.O.L.A.
  • A very good cat
  • Bishop #1-4
  • Lucas Bishop
  • Earth-1191
  • X.S.E.
  • A surprising convergence
  • Guilt
  • Bantam
  • Mountjoy
  • Some terrible banter
  • Several nontraditional modes of possession
  • Shard Bishop
  • How the kids talk these days
  • Hancock
  • Fashion of the future
  • A complex ethical struggle

NEXT EPISODE: More Cats references.

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As Mentioned in Episode 279 – Giant-Size Special #8

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
IT BEGINS! (Generation X #1)
Seriously, though, that is really gross. (Generation X #1)
I want to read a miniseries about this kid. (Generation X #1)
They are so very, very parents. (Generation X #1)
Sean Cassidy, OF ALL PEOPLE, should know EXACTLY how dangerous trees can be. (Generation X #1)
An old friend–of ours, and apparently of Monet’s. (Generation X #1)
Emplate is so cool and creepy! (Generation X #1)
Also cool and creepy: Chamber. (Generation X #1)
The covers of this series are so inviting. (Generation X #2)
For the record, HICK is worth 13 points to LOSER’s 5. (Generation X #2)
Penance is nothing if not efficient.
Ooh, Monet is GREAT. (Generation X #2)
That horror-movie framing! (Generation X #2)
DAMN, Paige! (Generation X #3)
Chamber is a neat dude. (Generation X #3)
Nanny X-plains puberty. (Generation X #3)
Mondo and Cordelia are… complicated. (Generation X #3)
If it weren’t for the two troubles in a row, this cover would be pretty darn near perfect, gradient and all. (Generation X #4)
Bachalo’s marginalia is WONDERFUL. (Generation X #4)
Seriously, so good. (Generation X #4)
Hi, Eliot. (Generation X #4)
Not all the images are gonna be of these guys, but it was tempting. (Generation X #4)
Fortunately, sometimes they intersect with plot. (Generation X #4)
And sometimes not. (Generation X #4)
I… I just love them so much. (Generation X #4)
Orphanmaker grew up! (Generation X #4)
Meanwhile, everything is terrible. (Generation X #4)
Well, maybe not everything. (Generation X #4)
This is one of my favorite scenes in any comic, ever. (Generation X #4)
And then, Legion Quest ended. (Generation X #4)
So, yeah, this is a thing, and you can watch it here should you find yourself so inclined.
NEXT WEEK: Jay & Miles on vacation!
NEXT EPISODE: Bishop goes solo!

LINKS & FURTHER FESTIVITY:


The full list of winners of the 2019 Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau Awards for Excellence at X-Cellence will be posted separately on 12/30.

279 – Giant-Size Special #8

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Jay would absolutely fight Christmas; we welcome guest X-Perts Christina Strain and Chip Zdarsky; a gift arrives; we consider the relationship of Generation X to Generation X; it is really not okay to leave your discarded skins lying around; D.O.A. is inordinately delightful; Chamber is the punk Shadow; Gateway goes to school; the Generation X TV movie is very, very bad; telepathy is free; the grown-ups are all right; home sucks; freedom rocks; Mondo deserves better; Matt Frewer did most things first; Kevin McNulty has appeared in literally everything; and you remain our favorites, ever.

X-PLAINED:

  • Mutation, for some value of the term
  • Holidays and the observation thereof
  • December 9
  • Jay’s ideal Christmas
  • How Chris Bachalo’s name is pronounced (more) (again) (sorry)
  • Several promotions
  • Generation X
  • Generation X #1-4
  • Generation X
  • Husk (Paige Guthrie)
  • M (Monet St. Croix)
  • Skin (Angelo Espinosa)
  • Synch (Everett Thomas)
  • Chamber (Jonothon Starsmore)
  • The New Xavier School for Gifted Youngsters
  • Counting Genises
  • The housekeeping implications of body horror
  • The M retcon
  • Continuity in costume design
  • The Danger Grotto
  • Emplate (somewhat)
  • D.O.A.
  • Penance (not that one)
  • Scrabble burns
  • An alternate take on power duplication
  • Mondo ()
  • The return of Nanny and the Orphanmaker
  • Eliot ()
  • A tentative friendship
  • How the Age of Apocalypse comes to Generation X
  • A movie that never fails to disappoint
  • The vagaries of adaptation
  • The best on-screen Emma Frost
  • Gang emails of the 1990s
  • Refrax
  • Buff
  • William Castle
  • The comedic genealogy of Max Headroom
  • Hatley Castle
  • The 2019 Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau Awards for Excellence at X-Cellence

NEXT WEEK: Jay & Miles go on vacation!
NEXT EPISODE: Bishop goes solo!

Special thanks to Christina Strain, Douglas Wolk, and Chip Zdarsky; and–always–to Matt Hunter, David Wynne, Tea Fougner, Anna Sheffey, and all of our patrons and listeners!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 278 – A Sheep in Wolf’s Clothing

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Fun times with the MLF. (X-Force Annual #3)
They were really pushing the idea that he was Roberto. (X-Force Annual #3)
I get that it’s supposed to be a bad thing; but, man, Dani’s horse got AWESOME. (X-Force Annual #3)
“Of course, they won’t need to figure out my password if they walk in on me journaling in IMAX.” (X-Force Annual #3)
The Collective Man! (X-Force Annual #3)
These two are just really not good at false identities, are they? (X-Force Annual #3)
Sometimes a family is a ghost and her imaginary baby. (X-Force Annual #3)
Alas, contrary to the implications of this cover, Storm will not be seduced by a giant statue of a lady in this story. (X-Man Annual #3)
“Chess is sexy, right?” (X-Man Annual #3)
Gene Ha draws a really terrific Storm. (X-Man Annual #3)
Do they usually? (X-Man Annual #3)
“Squares.” (X-Man Annual #3)
She’s not wrong. (X-Man Annual #3)
(It’s okay; it’s only a dream.) (X-Man Annual #3)
These are the most lackluster Lords Cardinal I’ve ever seen. (X-Man Annual #3)
“Even sixth base?” (X-Man Annual #3)
I unrepentantly love this silliness. (X-Man Annual #3)
Ugh, seriously, so good. (X-Man Annual #3)
NEXT EPISODE: NEXT EPISODE: Giant-Size Winter Special, feat. Christina Strain & Chip Zdarsky…
…hope you survive the experience!

LINKS & FURTHER ATROCITIES:

278 – A Sheep in Wolf’s Clothing

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Moonstar really wasn’t fooling anybody; Bird Brain is somehow still alive; Cassidy Keep is weird; Gene Ha draws excellent Storm; Reeva Payge makes her sole comics appearance; and Shinobi Shaw is wrong about everything.

X-PLAINED:

  • A not-particularly-cunning disguise
  • Upcoming coverage
  • X-Force Annual #3
  • X-Men Annual #3
  • The MLF
  • Reignfire (more) (again)
  • Moonstar (more) (again)
  • An unconventional way to keep a secret diary
  • A bittersweet semi-reunion
  • 3Peace
  • Murphy Keep
  • A ghost, maybe
  • The kind of thing that happens at Cassidy Keep
  • An excellent burn
  • Leather
  • “Neurotoxins”
  • Sex House as the definitive artifact of the 2010s
  • How not to draw someone having a nightmare
  • A very short-lived version of the Hellfire Club
  • How not to villain
  • Coming to terms with bad fictional tech

NEXT EPISODE: Giant-Size Winter Special, feat. Christina Strain & Chip Zdarsky!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 277 – Hedgehogs of Cairo

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Sauron has hella abs… (X-Men Unlimited #6)
…and apparently a come-hither gaze? (X-Men Unlimited #6)
Sauron’s backstory is a wild ride even by Silver Age standards. (X-Men Unlimited #6)
“Also, I get three mana of any color.” (X-Men Unlimited #6)
That’s our Sauron! (X-Men Unlimited #6)
Karl Lykos is a cheerful guy. (X-Men Unlimited #6)
They say it’s the smell, but I bet the other pterosaurs are actually judging him for his jorts. (X-Men Unlimited #6)
Meanwhile in Cairo… (X-Men Unlimited #7)
It really doesn’t seem like Candra should be able to bend her arms and legs. (X-Men Unlimited #7)
Truly, a fancy beard. (X-Men Unlimited #7)
Urchins: 1, Gambit: 0. (X-Men Unlimited #7)
Later, this kid will be retconned to have been imaginary. Don’t think too hard about it. (X-Men Unlimited #7)
STEALTH! (X-Men Unlimited #7)
X-Men vs. Urchins. (X-Men Unlimited #7)
Seriously, Candra, Storm will stab you in a sewer and not even care. (X-Men Unlimited #7)
NEXT EPISODE: Sex?

LINKS & FURTHER DINOSAURS

277 – Hedgehogs of Cairo

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Sauron is a huge nerd; the Savage Land is where Marvel stores the weird stuff; an etymology detour does not come from the X-Pert you’d expect; and Storm will straight-up stab you.

X-PLAINED:

  • Responsible weapon storage
  • X-Men Unlimited #6-7
  • A very large creative team
  • Sauron (more) (again)
  • Blood-derived powers
  • The Mutates
  • A pterosaur glow-up
  • Achmed El-Gibar
  • Street urchins (and the etymology thereof)
  • How to get a t’ieve mentor
  • Style vs. taste
  • The proportional relationship between knife skills and leadership potential
  • Tattoos vs. healing factors

NEXT EPISODE: Sex?

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 276 – Wizard Problems

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
I’m still kind of angry that this isn’t the interior art style. (Excalibur #83)
But are there roller skates? (Excalibur #83)
Still creepy; still cool. (Excalibur #83)
‘Kay. (Excalibur #83)
There’s something very Philip Bond about this pair of panels; and I, for one, am here for it. (Excalibur #83)
Ew. (Excalibur #83)
Evil Kitty’s hair is SO GREAT. (Excalibur #84)
Seriously. So. Excellent. (Excalibur #84)
Is it, though? (Excalibur #84)
Purple on purple. (Excalibur #84)
“Magic, subtext, whatever.” (Excalibur #84)
Choices, choices. (Excalibur #84)
It’s like when a character has been written out of a show but the actor’s contract isn’t up so they have to keep doing flashbacks. (Excalibur #85)
Starring Eliot Spencer as Wolverine. (Excalibur #85)
That’s just… not true. Like, at all. (Excalibur #85)
AND THAT’S WHY YOU ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE (Excalibur #85)
Next Episode: Jorts Unlimited!

LINKS & FURTHER DIVERSIONS:

276 – Wizard Problems

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Excalibur gets a regular writer again; we judge a book against against its covers; nothing good ever comes from being sexy on Muir Isle; and the soul sword’s real power is cutting through continuity.

X-PLAINED:

  • Stegron
  • Dinosaur powers
  • Excalibur #83-85 (The Soul Sword Trilogy)
  • Warren Ellis on Excalibur
  • Excalibur (more) (again)
  • Bends Sinister and Bend Sinister
  • Outsider days
  • Mail
  • Boundaries
  • Darkoth
  • Gravemoss
  • The Winding Way
  • Shrill
  • A problematic prosthesis
  • Roger Corman’s The Raven
  • A large number of continuity errors
  • Gratuitous dickery
  • An untold tale
  • The semantics of skin removal
  • Possession vs. retrograde amnesia
  • The circle of nostalgia

NEXT EPISODE: Jorts Unlimited!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!