Nathan Summers – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

349 – Onslaught Secret Weapon Force Power Slammers

October 10, 2021 Jay 24 comments

Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | RSS

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Onslaught nomenclature has some consistency issues; electricity is the new magnetism; Nate Grey mopes; Sinister doesn’t care about your guns; the Xavier mansion blows up (again); and we track down an elusive Sentinel.

X-PLAINED

Doctor Doom’s absolutely irrelevant Onslaught encounter
Cable #34
Incredible Hulk #444
X-Man #18
X-Force #57
Onslaught Phases vs. Impacts
Ozymandias (more) (again)
Post (more) (again)
Cable’s ridiculous motorcycle
Several Hulks
Behemoth
Cable/Storm
The Betty Conspiracy
Rocks that yell
Alpacalypse
Multiversal disambiguation
Some unlikely sound effects
An anti-Sinister failsafe
A self-destruct system
Warpath and Risque
A hug
A very specific Sentinel
Coming out in adulthood

NEXT WEEK: Hawk Talk

NEXT EPISODE: Somehow We Have Made 350 of These (and also more Onslaught)

The visual companion will be up later this week!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 343 – The Water Cooler of Violence

August 15, 2021 Jay 5 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

LIES ALL LIES (X-Force #55)

(Probably not a LMD. This time.) (X-Force #55)

I’m not sure sound works like that, but it’s still cool. (X-Force #55)

And now you know how animated Wolverine feels. (X-Force #55)

Well, that’s one way to open a giant door. (X-Force #55)

Seriously, why is he in his underwear? (X-Force #55)

It’s really not any harder to believe than anything else in this comic. (X-Force #55)

Sacrelicious! (X-Force #56)

The Benjamin Russell storyline really doesn’t make any sense when you break it down… (X-Force #56)

I have nightmares like this. (X-Force #56)

IT WAS GAMESMASTER ALL ALONG SURE WHY NOT (X-Force #56)

We kinda forgot to cover this first time ’round. (X-Men Unlimited #8)

Puberty’s rough, buddy. (X-Men Unlimited #8)

“There’s a new mutant about to manifest! Let’s have the MOST UNSETTLING X-Man go follow him around!” (X-Men Unlimited #8)

Seriously, there is NO evidence at this point that it’s the word “mutant” that sends the kid running and not, say, the lightning. (X-Men Unlimited #8)

This is the part where it starts to feel like one of those books you could get in the ’80s with your kid’s name as the protagonist. (X-Men Unlimited #8)

See what I mean? (X-Men Unlimited #8)

“They usually bring you back in a dozen or so issues. Why?” (X-Men Unlimited #8)

And they all lived happily ever after.* *Joined the Thunderbolts, became Maverick, maybe blew up? (X-Men Unlimited #8)

NEXT EPISODE: Where no mutant has gone before!

LINKS & FURTHER CATASTROPHES:

For the backstory on the Weisman Institute, listen to Episode 304 – Explosive Ops.
Please enjoy the genius that is Hans Jensen.

343 – The Water Cooler of Violence

August 15, 2021 Jay 13 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | RSS

In which X-Force carries on the New Mutants’ tradition of property damage; a lot of people have infiltrated Helicarriers; G.W. Bridge makes it weird; Gamesmaster returns to no particular end; and we go back in time to cover the origins of Chris Bradley.

X-PLAINED:

The deaths of several Worthingtons
X-Force #55-56
X-Men Unlimited #8
A legacy of explosions
Uncanny X-Men #333 (briefly) (again)
A heist
Several of the many characters who had successfully infiltrated Helicarriers as of 1996
Dum Dum Dugan
Contessa Valentina Allegra de Fontaine
The glory days off LASER tag
Church fights
Subtext
The Weisman Institute for the Criminally Insane (more) (again)
How to pronounce “Risque”
Chris Bradley
Hans Jensen
Nostalgia goggles and their absence
Civilian awareness of cosmic Marvel
Asgard, Oklahoma
Annalee

NEXT WEEK: Hawk Talk

NEXT EPISODE: Where No Mutant Has Gone Before

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 301 – Can’t Beat the Real Thing

July 19, 2020 Jay One comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

This is in fact an ENTIRELY REASONABLE position under the circumstances. (X-Men Prime #1)

Dennis is his own disparaging narrator. (X-Men Prime #1)

I don’t know why John Constantine is here to question Trish Tilby’s ethics, but SOMEONE needs to. (X-Men Prime #1)

Why is Val here? WHO KNOWS? (X-Men Prime #1)

Pretty sure this is supposed to be Onslaught, but it’s not going to be confirmed, so… (X-Men Prime #1)

“I repurposed all the brain parts that would normally go to fashion sense. On one hand, I can keep track of every team in play. On the other hand, this is how I dress myself.” (X-Men Prime #1)

Mondays, amirite? (X-Men Prime #1)

That’s… exactly what a chaperone is, though. (X-Men Prime #1)

GUYS SOMETIMES PEOPLE ARE JUST IN A HURRY (X-Men Prime #1)

Just wait ’til Age of X-Man. (X-Men Prime #1)

Emplate: still exceptionally creepy. (X-Men Prime #1)

nopenopenopenopenope (X-Men Prime #1)

I’ve seen at least three horror movies that basically start this way. (X-Men Prime #1)

NEXT EPISODE: The fall of Avalon, and some related situation comedy.

LINKS & FURTHER HOMECOMINGS:

301 – Can’t Beat the Real Thing

July 19, 2020 Jay 19 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | RSS

In which we enter our fourth century of podcasting with brand new theme music; we have both Wolverine questions and wolverine questions; it is extremely rough to be Bishop; the creator of Garfield may or may not live in a sewer on Earth-616; Rogue needs better coping mechanisms; bigotry is depressingly timeless; and everything is Onslaught now.

X-PLAINED:

Joseph’s Brotherhood of Evil Mutants
Our new theme music
X-Men Prime #1
A genuinely cool cover gimmick
What happened after the end of the world
Boundaries
War crimes vs. fashion crimes
Destruction of real landmarks in fiction
A mysterious assailant
Actual embodied chaos god Jim Davis and his Earth-616 namesake
Several memorable Garfield stories
Marrow (Sarah Rushman)
The secret origin of the Morlocks
A friendship we miss
Unhealthy coping mechanisms
The perennially dubious journalistic ethics of Trish Tilby
Dennis
The death of Dennis
Flaws of the mutant metaphor (more) (again)
Several refugees from Earth-295
Mr. Summers and Mr. Summers
The secret origin of the Genoshan mutates
The Acolytes
The continuing relevance of the mutant metaphor (more) (again)
Cross-universe characterization

NEXT EPISODE: The fall of Avalon!

NOTE: The Garfield strips Jay mentions appeared in newspapers, on purpose, in October 1989.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 299 – Toaster Ovens of the Gods

June 28, 2020 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

For full effect, there really needs to be an inset panel of Storm mugging at the reader. (What If? vol. 2 #77)

Forge is a JERK. (What If? vol. 2 #77)

What the hell kind of weird drills does this universe have? (What If? vol. 2 #77)

It’s weird that there’s a universe where both of these kids exist. (What If? vol. 2 #77)

I wonder if the Phoenix designs new costumes every time; and, if so, what its aesthetic phases have been. (What If? vol. 2 #77)

Is this page foreshadowing a Days of Future Past-style dystopia? Discuss. (What If? vol. 2 #77)

No, seriously, he JUST KEEPS SAYING IT. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

That hair. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

Brother Voodoo X-Plains the premise. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

Uncalled for, Ben. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

Damnit, Nate. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

Just had to work it in again, huh? (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

The costume just isn’t the same without metal wings. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

DAMNIT, NATE. (What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse)

Why does Magneto look kind of like Keanu Reeves here? (What If? vol. 2 #81)

The more I look at the art from this issue, the angrier I get about it. (What If? vol. 2 #81)

[cries in comics editor] (What If? vol. 2 #81)

Galactus is a poet, and he didn’t even know it! (He knew it.) (What If? vol. 2 #81)

Relatable sentiment. (What If? vol. 2 #81)

Hello, mid-1990s CG. You… sure do exist. (What If? vol. 2 #81)

NEXT EPISODE: The end of a world. (Also, #300? So, that’s a thing.)

LINKS & FURTHER HYPOTHETICALS

You can hear all about Be X-Tra Safe With the X-Men in Episode 177 – The Less You Know.
Read Teen Vogue. Seriously.
You can see the Havok Care Bear–along with the Cyclops one that Jay made–over here.
Waiting for the Trade Magneto is the One True Magneto, now and forever.

299 – Toaster Ovens of the Gods

June 28, 2020 Jay 15 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | RSS

In which some universes are more pleasant than others; Havok is basically a Care Bear; Wolverine is a P.R. nightmare; Nate Grey tries; stealth is not among the Silver Surfer’s strengths; Night Thrasher ascends to godhood; Jay and Miles dive down the What If rabbit hole.

X-PLAINED:

Earth-200500 (again)
Earth-42409
What If? vol. 2 #77
What If? Featuring X-Men: Age of Apocalypse
What If? vol. 2 #81
Earth-77995
Fashion editorials
One of the worse versions of Forge
Superheroes x fashion
Care Bears vs. X-Men
The Hellfire Club of Earth-77995
A surprisingly normal Grey-Summers family
Several uses for the Phoenix Force
Worst-case scenarios
Earth-93074
Savage Land home ec
Bad choices
The Defenders of Earth-93074
How to manipulate Nate Grey
Narrative benefits of omnipotence
A time loop
Earth-9601
A meeting on the moon
What the Watcher watches
Galactus
The Silver Surfer
Grandpa Magneto
Some remarkable technology
A heavy-handed metaphor
Our takes on What If scenarios
The Corbeau-Grey scale of decision making
Storm’s eyes
Our character voices

NEXT EPISODE: X-Men Omega

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop! This June, we’ll be donating all of the profits to Trans Lifeline!

As Mentioned in Episode 273 – The Back-End Creep

November 17, 2019 Jay 2 comments

Listen to the podcast here!

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Ouch. (Wolverine #85)

Do you think Cable got there early and then waited for someone to say his name so he could make a dramatic entrance? (Wolverine #85)

here is your large adult son (Wolverine #85)

Aw, man, right in the feels. (Wolverine #85)

And again. (Wolverine #85)

I like this cover more than it probably deserves. (Cable #16)

Lang’s tiny panties might be the weirdest thing about the whole Phalanx situation. (Cable #16)

Well, that happened. (Cable #16)

Cable vs. Derrida. (Cable #16)

He really never learns. (Cable #16)

It’s cute how anyone ever thinks Cameron Hodge is going to accept defeat with grace. (Cable #16)

GET IT? ‘CAUSE HE’S POINTY! (Cable #16)

NEXT EPISODE: Talking House of X and Powers of X with Chris Eddleman!

LINKS & FURTHER CATASTROPHES:

WHOA DANG WE’VE BEEN ON A LOT OF PODCASTS LATELY!
- Miles joined Titan Up the Defense for Tales of the Haunted Disco Barn…
- …and got his Dracula on in Exiled’s Assault on Camelot Eternal!
- Meanwhile, Jay joined the Fantasticast for a look at Karma’s debut!
Did you know that Jay co-wrote a Thor novel? Because that happened. (Lila Cheney is in it, so you know it’s gonna be cool.)

273 – The Back-End Creep (The Phalanx Covenant, Part 3 of 3)

November 17, 2019 Jay 9 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | RSS

In which we have been on All the Podcasts; Full Shred Thrash is easier to say that it sounds; the Phalanx uses dial-up; Cable is a very large man; Larry Hama writes excellent banter; Cyclops has been progressively desensitized to plane crashes; Cameron Hodge is never graceful in defeat; and Final Sanction is actually about family.

X-PLAINED:

Mithras
A large number of guest appearances
Thor: Metal Gods
The Phalanx Covenant so far
Full Shred Thrash
Adam Kubert
Wolverine #85
Cable #16
Gorp, Waldo, and Apache
Popping silk
A Summers family reunion
Jean and Nathan
Jean Grey’s astral form
Genetics
Several airplanes
Mountain climbing
Gelatinous yahoos
Several impermanent deaths
Pregnant X-team members
Outside references to the X-Men

NEXT EPISODE: House of X, feat. Chris Eddleman

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!