In which ballistics get weird; Black Air is no W.H.O.; we have surprisingly mixed feelings about Pete Wisdom and Kitty Pryde as a couple; there is an actual creepy clown bar in Portland; blood eagles are excessively ostentatious; the Uncreated just want to be cool; and Rory Campbell continues his descent into supervillainy.
X-PLAINED:
The Forever Man
Turner D. Century
Excalibur #87-90
Excalibur (more) (again)
Genosha (more) (again)
Some extremely confusing bullets
Philip Moreau
Jenny Ransome
Black Air
Dream Nails
Spy bars
Foundations of Kitty Pryde and Pete Wisdom’s relationship
Captions
Work/life separation
A creepy clown bar
Easy Tiger
Blood eagles
Shrine
A virus and/or bacteria
The Uncreated
Gor the God-Butcher
Data security
Rory Campbell vs. Spoor
How the X-Men got their name
Terrigen toxicity
NEXT EPISODE: Starjammers!
Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
In which we enter the era of bomber jackets; the covers are the cards; Genosha remains neither green nor pleasant; the A is for “Avengers,” not “A-list”; Henry Peter Gyrich is the straightest of men; Cyclops sets an important precedent; Exodus is a huge jerk; we speculate about movies we have definitely not seen; Stephen Strange is not a qualified OBGYN; the Avengers are really weird even by our standards; and Max manages to connect two of Marvel’s most complicated family trees.
X-PLAINED:
One way to name babies
Blood Ties
Infinite bomber jackets
Avengers #368-369
X-Men #26
Avengers West Coast #101
Uncanny X-Men #307
Several very fancy covers
A shadow government, but not that kind of shadow government
Genosha (more) (again)
The Avengers, as of 1993
A special delegation
The Genoshan resistance
U.S. Agent
A time Cyclops told someone other than Dracula to follow their heart
The many belts of Nicholas Fury
Several members of the Maximoff family (more) (again)
Black Knight (Dane Whitman)
Sersi
A very drawn-out fight
Roy Thomas dialogue
The racist icing on the racist cake
Exodus (Bennet du Paris)
Diplomacy, kind of
Apolitical avenging
Magneto’s dream
A green and pleasant beverage
Yet another energy-dome-enclosed crisis
The giant, angry disembodied head of Charles Xavier
What is definitely the actual plot of the Purge movies
The surprisingly torrid private lives of the Maximoffs
Scarlet Witch and Vision’s kids
Master Pandemonium and his weird baby hands
Damian Hellstrom
How we’d handle Magneto’s family in modern Marvel
Robopaternity
A possible link between the Summers and Maximoff families
NEXT EPISODE: Live at Emerald City Comic Con, with Vita Ayala, Seanan McGuire, and Leah Williams!
Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
No matter how many times I look at this, I still imagine this dude moving like tumbleweed. (X-Factor #82)
HEY, LOOK, MARVEL GOT A NEW LICENSE! (X-Factor #82)
Havok: Actually a reasonably good boss! (X-Factor #82)
I spent a LOT of time googling jaw injuries to try to figure out what the hell the hardware on Lorna’s face is supposed to be. Verdict: IT’S A MYSTERY. (X-Factor #82)
Live your best life, Toad. (X-Factor #82)
The fastest withering insults in the West. (X-Factor #82)
The new Phantazia.
THIS IS A VALID CONCERN. (X-Factor #82)
(It’s okay; Sam’s fine and possibly immortal.) (X-Factor #82)
Remember like five pages ago when it was a big deal that Lorna’s jaw was wired shut? (X-Factor #82)
I feel you, Lukas. (X-Factor #83)
Oh, this is gonna be awkward. (X-Factor #83)
WELL THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY. (X-Factor #83)
They’re going to bond over how much they hate everyone else. (X-Factor #83)
I’m still trying to figure this out. Maybe mutate children are artificially physically matured as part of the mutate process? (X-Factor #83)
Stairs are funny. (X-Factor #83)
Sure, why not? (X-Factor #83)
Aw, they’re best friends now. Because they’re both jerks. (X-Factor #83)
Poor Zachary. (X-Factor #83)
He’ll be okay, but this storyline is not going to get resolved until after X-Cutioner’s Song. (X-Factor #83)
Rick Chalker, on the other hand, will definitely not be okay. (X-Factor #83)
In which nobody wears the pants in the X-Plain family; Havok is a remarkably okay boss; Polaris may want to find a new doctor; Quicksilver has no time for your nonsense; we are very conditionally okay with resurrections; and if you spoil Season 5 of Steven Universe for Miles, we will never ever ever forgive you.
X-PLAINED:
Jay & Miles at FlameCon
Advantages of recording remotely
X-Factor #81-83
What Genosha’s been up to
Prodigal
An impassioned speech
An unfortunate accident
Yet another return(ish) of Sauron
Chain of command
Lukas
Pirouette
Yet another justification for the name of the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants
Phantazia (again)
Immovable vs. unstoppable
What you do on a boat
Taylor
When Havok still cared
“The Mutant Rap”
Adventures in New York
How to bond with Quicksilver
An angry mob
A derailed storyline
The ignominious death of Rick Chalker
Our opinions on the revolving door of death
X-Men vs. electronics
Superheroes from the Balkans
Theoretical X-Men and Steven Universe team-ups
NEXT EPISODE: X-Editor Jordan D. White!
Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
Art by David Wynne. Contact David to purchase the original!
WELL, THEN. (Uncanny X-Men #264)
“Also, we think they might be slightly evil.” (Uncanny X-Men #264)
Seriously, though, THEY ARE NEVER GOING TO MENTION THE TENTACLES AGAIN. (Uncanny X-Men #264)
But can it teach aerobics? I DON’T THINK SO. (Uncanny X-Men #264)
Wolverine WWII flashbacks are usually pretty fun. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
No, YOU ship it. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
Her hair is so great, though. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
How can one character be so awesome? It seems kind of unfair. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
Don’t fuck with Seraph. She’ll kick your ass and leave you with a blood debt to Viper. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
“Look, it was this or leather pants.” (Uncanny X-Men #268)
It’s fair to assume that whatever Jubilee is doing in the background is roughly a million times more entertaining than whatever’s going on in the A-plot. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
Jim Lee cocktail dresses, topped off with Jim Lee hair. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
It was REALLY HARD to not make this whole visual companion nothing but Jubilee. I hope you appreciate my restraint. (Uncanny X-Men #268)
Remember that time Cap made an awkward pass at Wolverine? (Uncanny X-Men #268)
Come for the broken spine; stay for spoiling the surprise twist! (And yet, somehow, we still love this cover.) (Uncanny X-Men #269)
If I had a dollar for every day I’ve woken up like this… (Uncanny X-Men #269)
In which Jim Lee does a pretty solid Barry Windsor Smith. (Uncanny X-Men #269)
“Now put on some damn pants and fight me!” (Uncanny X-Men #269)
“But you’re… you’re so evil! And sexy!” (Uncanny X-Men #269)
Well, that explains a thing or two. (Uncanny X-Men #269)
It’s really not the Savage Land without a sexy montage. (Uncanny X-Men #269)
Okay. This looks bad. (Uncanny X-Men #269)
It’s easy to make fun of this page, but at the same time, it’s really damn cool. (Uncanny X-Men #269)
Lila Cheney: falls into the heart of a sun, comes back more stylin’ than ever! (Uncanny X-Men #269)
Art by David Wynne. Contact David to purchase the original!
In which Laura easily is worth a dozen Old Mans Logan; Charlotte Jones is the EveryCop; Genosha remains a fairly versatile allegory; Hydra are totally Nazis; Jubilee gets the best sound effects; Rogue has a bad day; and it’ll take more than a sun to stop Lila Cheney.
X-PLAINED:
Graydon Creed
Logan oversaturation (more) (again)
Uncanny X-Men #264, 268, 269
A somewhat convoluted status quo
Death by Derrida
New York’s sewers (kind of) (maybe)
The Misty Knight rule
Jackets of the ’90s
Cap’s cape
Mustache metaphysics
The Press Gang (again)
VR.5
The Doctrine of Hot Pursuit
Dazzler, in handy grenade form
A prescient scenario
Jim Lee signature cocktail dresses
A dubious approach to first aid
Wolverine’s sexy friends
Nazi ducks
Seraph
Ivan Petrovitch
Sexy subversion
Rogue vs. Carol Danvers
Mutants vs. the Terrigen Mists
TaXonomy of ambiguously X-characters
NEXT EPISODE: Days of Future Present!
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
In which we continue to follow the post-Siege Perilous X-Men; Dazzler finally makes her big-screen debut; Callisto gets a day job; Colossus gets a ponytail; still more X-Men fake their deaths; Jean Grey gets tentacles; Professor Wolverine is a jerk; and Jay overthinks Community.
X-PLAINED:
The new-new Howling Commandos
Hit-Monkey
Uncanny X-Men #259-263
Dazzler: The Movie (again)
Freddie Stanacheck
Eric Beale
What Dazzler would do
Peter Nicholas
Jenny Ransome and Phillip Moreau (again)
Twin Peaks references, canonical and otherwise
Genoshan foreign policy
The value of allegory
Some regrettable X-costumes
That time Jean Grey got tentacles
Molly the cat
Dubious medical ethics
Hardcase and the Harriers
An unlikely pizza party
A theoretical Community/X-Men costume party
NEXT EPISODE: Spotlight on the Starjammers!
You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
