Lucas Bishop – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

386 – No Puppies for Storm

September 25, 2022 Jay 9 comments

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which treading water isn’t always a bad thing; Storm remains an irresponsible leader; nobody should ever trust Dark Beast; we are befuddled by a large metal man; Maggott makes his debut; and we ship the heck out of Deathbird and Bishop.

X-PLAINED:

The time Captain America dated a supervillain
Treading water
Gene Nation (again)
Uncanny X-Men Annual 1997
Uncanny X-Men #345
Razors
Humanity’s Last Stand
Surprise
Boost and Tether
D’gard
A Star Trek allusion
The Morlock retcon
Maggott (Japheth)
A large metal individual
Foreshadowing
A large, inconvenient spaceship
Magneto’s relationship to Judaism
Recovery from the Legacy Virus

NEXT EPISODE: Field Trip to Mount Wundagore!

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As Mentioned in Episode 379 – Stardate: Today

July 24, 2022 Jay Leave a comment

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

FAO Schwarz, allegedly. (Uncanny X-Men #341)

Gladiator is not great at diplomacy. (Uncanny X-Men #341)

I AM SO WORRIED ABOUT THIS POOR MAN AND HIS HORSE (Uncanny X-Men #341)

New Outfits: Trish (Uncanny X-Men #342)

New Outfits: Bishop and Rogue (Uncanny X-Men #342)

New Outfits: Gambit, Joseph, and Beast (Uncanny X-Men #342)

Well, that’s a new look for the Phalanx. (Uncanny X-Men #343)

One for your reaction files. (Uncanny X-Men #343)

Word balloons on the cover are an underrated gimmick. (Uncanny X-Men #344)

Where babies come from! (Uncanny X-Men #344)

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X vs. Black Tom Cassidy!

379 – Stardate: Today

July 17, 2022 Jay 7 comments

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In which what happens in space stays in space; a horse is imperiled; Joseph does some dubious science; Gladiator’s name is absolutely not Gary; everybody gets new costumes; and we learn where babies come from.

X-PLAINED:

Shi’ar taxonomy, sort of
The Shi’ar (again)
The Phalanx (again)
Uncanny X-Men #341-344
A whole bunch of callbacks to X-Men #98
A carriage ride
The Z’noxx chamber (again)
One way to have safer sex
FAO Schwarz
The Shi’ar Imerial Guard (again)
Diplomacy, kind of
Space outfits
Trademarks
Pure Phalanx
Dinosaur Kingdom 2
Where Shi’ar babies come from
Flirting
The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl vs. Isca the Unbeaten
Characters we would happily voice if invited to do so

NEXT WEEK: Hawk Talk

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X vs. Black Tom Cassidy!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

As Mentioned in Episode 369 – Carly Askani

April 17, 2022 Miles Leave a comment

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

“This ought to give you” *POW* “a new perspective” *BIFF* “on things, Alex!” (Uncanny X-Men #339)

Head trauma for Lucas BIshop! (Uncanny X-Men #339)

I mean, she’s not wrong. (Uncanny X-Men #339)

“You think I just fell off the turnip truck, McCoy? No one pulls a fast one on J. Jonah Jameson!” (Uncanny X-Men #339)

“I’m Ororo Munroe, and I’m here to x-plain the X-Men… because it’s about time someone did.” (Uncanny X-Men #339)

Never trust a Summers when he tells you he’s fine. (Uncanny X-Men #339)

Well, if they can print it, I guess we can post it. (X-Men #59)

Head trauma for Lucas Bishop! Again! (X-Men #59)

Hell of a Wolverine you’ve got there, Mr. Kubert. (X-Men #59)

JOSEPH I AM CALLING THE POLICE (X-Men #59)

Not quite as good as the Rogue/Gambit kiss from #41, but still… whoa. (X-Men #59)

I’M HUGE (X-Men #59)

“For instance, I can see through this utterly massive chin.” (Wolverine Annual 1996)

Josef Stalin..? (Wolverine Annual 1996)

Up… (Wolverine Annual 1996)

…and up… (Wolverine Annual 1996)

…and up. (Wolverine Annual 1996)

“General Grievious, sir, it’s the Jedi!” (Wolverine Annual 1996)

You know, I think this might be Sunfire’s best non-Age of Apocalypse look! (Wolverine Annual 1996)

*Pacific Rim music plays* (and now it’s in your head too) (Wolverine Annual 1996)

Logan, that… that was there before. Maybe you need to adjust your bandana. (Wolverine Annual 1996)

NEXT TIME: The Silver Age with Max Carleton!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING

369 – Carly Askani

April 17, 2022 Miles 23 comments

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In which Storm & Joseph X-Plain the X-Men, Alex Summers is not brainwashed this time, he promises, Scott Lobdell writes better moments than stories, Ed McGuinness draws very large chins, and it’s Denver the Last Dinosaur, not Denver the Lost Dinosaur

X-PLAINED:

Uncanny X-Men #339
Spider-Man disambiguation
A. Kubert disambiguation
J. Jonah Jameson (again) (hooray!)
Sneaking songs
The history of smoking regulation on airlines
Creed disambiguation
Havok’s Brotherhood of Evil Mutants
Bonding while falling out of planes
X-Men #59
The copyright status of Mr. Smith Goes to Washington
Well-drawn Wolverines
Hercules vs The Tick
Wolverine Annual 1996
The tragic death of Mariko Yashida
Silver Samurai (Kuniuchio Harada)
Sunfire (Shiro Yoshida) and what he’s been up to since Fatal Attractions
Josef Stalin, apparently?
Red Ronin and its nemesis, a time-lost dinosaur who we assure you is not Godzilla
Jedi and/or samurai vs. doors
Our logo fonts
James Howlett, guidance counselor
Onslaught but not evil
Whether Magneto could wield Mjolnir

NEXT EPISODE: The Silver Age with Max Carleton!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 363 – Licked by a Shadow

February 20, 2022 Jay 6 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

It’s hard to be Warren Kenneth Worthington III. (Uncanny X-Men #338)

Hey, feathers! (Uncanny X-Men #338)

Peep those teeny peepers! (Uncanny X-Men #338)

YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN? SHE’S TOTALLY POUNCING ON PSYLOCKE! (Uncanny X-Men #338)

That’s our J. Jonah Jameson! (Uncanny X-Men #338)

Guys. GUYS. (Uncanny X-Men #338)

Ouch. (X-Men #58)

In which William Drake has a rare moment of conscience. (X-Men #58)

Rogue can’t sleep without dramatic irony. (X-Men #58)

“What do kids like these days? Dirtbikes, right?) (X-Men Annual 1996)

Well, that’ll ruin a baseball game. (X-Men Annual 1996)

Aw, man. (X-Men Annual 1996)

Can we discuss the apparent existence of X-Beer? (X-Men Annual 1996)

ALLL RIIIGHT indeed. (X-Men Annual 1996)

LOOK AT ALL THOSE X-MANS! (X-Men Annual 1996)

NEXT EPISODE: Pryde & Wisdom

363 – Licked by a Shadow

February 20, 2022 Jay 8 comments

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In which standing in fields looking confused is a way of life; Psylocke gets a new superpower; when you gotta confess you gotta confess; Iceman’s dad stands up for justice; we mourn a Sentinel; and it’s probably a good thing that most companies don’t do mind melds as a team-building exercise.

X-PLAINED:

Levels of mutant power
Omicron-level mutations
Miles’s brief baseball career
Uncanny X-Men #338
X-Men #58
X-Men Annual 1996
Archangel’s wings
Joseph vs. Holographic Magneto
Shadow teleportation
The errand theory of confession
Graydon Creed (more) (again)
“Drake Roberts” and “Samson Guthry”
Several ways to memorialize the Mutant Massacre
Onslaught, but an anteater
A fight
Several JJJ cameos
X-baseball games
A highly atypical Sentinel
Several oblique warnings
X-Men ‘97
Media inspired by the X-Men

NEXT EPISODE: Pryde & Wisdom

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 347 – Onslaught Begins

September 26, 2021 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

What, indeed? (Uncanny X-Men #334)

He’s a man of simple pleasures. (Uncanny X-Men #334)

We ship it. (Uncanny X-Men #334)

What the HELL, Professor X? (Uncanny X-Men #334)

Again: THE HELL?! (Uncanny X-Men #334)

It sucks to be Dark Beast, as it should. (X-Men #54)

The wreck of Professor Xavier’s office… (X-Men #54)

…and the wreck of Professor Xavier. (X-Men #54)

Before there was SIXIS, there was OVALZNO. (Onslaught: X-Men #1)

Shielded thoughts get red borders. (Onslaught: X-Men #1)

HE’S SO DRAMATIC (Onslaught: X-Men #1)

I know he’s evil right now, but I bet Xavier was also just a super creepy kid. (Onslaught: X-Men #1)

NEXT EPISODE: More Onslaught.

LINKS & FURTHER ALLUSIONS

Muscle March sure is a real video game that actually exists.

347 – Onslaught Begins

September 26, 2021 Jay 14 comments

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In which we stop procrastinating and dive headfirst into Onslaught; Professor Xavier is a jerk; Dark Beast wasn’t even supposed to be here today; Onslaught declaims like it’s the Silver Age; Bishop gets some long-awaited closure; and we pitch alternate candidates for the X-traitor.

X-PLAINED:

Hyperstorm
Onslaught (entity)
Onslaught (event)
Uncanny X-Men #334
X-Men #54
Onslaught: X-Men #1
How to pronounce “Buccellato”
The opposite of a pep talk
Nate Grey vs. Professor X
The Z’noxx (again)
One of several times Charles Xavier has faked his own death
Muscle March
Franklin Richards
The Gem of Cyttorak
A villain speech
That one recording Bishop found in the future
The X-traitor
Li’l Charlie
Magneto’s hood ornament
Alternate takes on the X-traitor

NEXT EPISODE: Onslaught continues.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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