Miles

440 – Fightin’ and Ballin’

February 11, 2024 Miles 6 comments

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From organic steel to organic… whatever that is. (*X-Men* #83)

In which the Hunt for Xavier remains vaguely disappointing; Gambit is good with kids; nanomachines are the new unstable molecules; Marrow is a walking armory; and we recommend comics for babies.

X-PLAINED:

The Hunt for Xavier, Part 2
Babies and/or ghosts
Chekhov’s repowering
X-Men #83-84
Uncanny X-Men #364
Cerebro / Cerebro Prime
Cerebrite Alpha
Cerebrite Beta
X-Men serial numbers
What Gambit’s friends call him
How Miles stopped worrying and learned to love Gambit
Evil robot sperm
Mary Purcell
Multiple-monitor displays
A computer with a computer
AI
The Florida facility
Post
Pile-Driver X
A glimpse into the butt of all humanity
Comics for babies
Name-based powers

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X has Dracula problems!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 439 – Fishfic

February 4, 2024 Miles 4 comments

Listen to the episode here.

A very loud search party. (Uncanny X-Men #362)

Stooges in shorts. (Uncanny X-Men #362)

The Continuing Saga of Gambit & the Gassy Lady. (Uncanny X-Men #362)

Storm and Marrow have their best conversations while fucking up automobiles. (Uncanny X-Men #362)

*Driving rock intro* (Uncanny X-Men #362)

Gassy ladies, fire ladies… It hard to be Gambit. (Uncanny X-Men #362)

This version of Cerebro doesn’t require telepathy to use, but it does require a cute outfit. (Uncanny X-Men #362)

In medias swamp-rat. (X-Men #82)

He has agreed to take me / To the ice hotel from the magazine (X-Men #82)

Whoa indeed, Keanu. (X-Men #82)

You’ve all had that dream too, right? (X-Men #82)

Clockwise from top-left: blood, black bile, phlegm, yellow bile. (X-Men #82)

I have no idea what kind of metal band Cerebro fronts, but I would listen to them. (X-Men #82)

I miss Toad’s too-many-Liefeldian-teeth look, but this one’s pretty great. (Uncanny X-Men #363)

Maybe the post-Fall era of X-Men will finally explain what Wolverine smelled. (Uncanny X-Men #363)

Cerebro’s other outfit. (Uncanny X-Men #363)

What’s… what’s happening here?! (Uncanny X-Men #363)

Shoulda just complimented her classic fedora-‘n’-trenchcoat look. (Uncanny X-Men #363)

Meanwhile, in the margins of a Wolverine one-shot… (Uncanny X-Men #363)

Somewhat new, somewhat different. (Uncanny X-Men #363)

NEXT TIME: 2 Hunt 2 Xavier

439 – Fishfic

February 4, 2024 Miles 9 comments

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In which we reach the beginning of an end; Jay totally forgot Gambit was there; we’re all living in the Mary Purcelliverse; the X-Men split the party; and we explore The Bay Area’s Bohemian Hotbed of Student Anarchy.

X-PLAINED:

Mary Purcell (sort of)
The re-defaulting of the X-Men
Uncanny X-Men #362-323
X-Men #82
Nebraska
Pyro (Saint John Allerdyce) and his endless illness
Legacy Virus variations
Going home again
Running back and forth in quarries
Marrow, who’s come a long way
The two forms of fire: skeleton monsters and sexy ladies
Cerebro (the evil one)
San Francisco and Tajikinistan
Asphalt ball pits
A topsy-turvy nonsensical impossible hell
Nina the Mannite
Desire, love, loss, and fear
Skulls and spines
The New (New) Brotherhood of Mutants
Cerebrites Alpha and Beta
A lost, smelly fish
Ambiguous art
Blood, sweat, and fears
Which mutants would cause the most chaos at holiday gatherings
Hopes for post-Fall society

NEXT EPISODE: 2 Hunt 2 Xavier

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 438 – The Man of Harsh Business

January 28, 2024 Miles One comment

Listen to the episode here.

The confident sneer of a man with a shillelagh. (Uncanny X-Men #361)

Wolverine, vigilante relationship counselor. (Uncanny X-Men #361)

A Juggernaut diminished. (Uncanny X-Men #361)

Dude’s got his flaws, but Gambit really knows how to make an entrance! (Uncanny X-Men #361)

Shadowcat and Gambit have met before, but never so close to whatever’s in Juggernaut’s pants. (Uncanny X-Men #361)

“I especially don’t want anyone to see my impressive collection of Jonathan Taylor Thomas calendars!” (Uncanny X-Men #361)

The X-Men have their best conversations while fighting ninjas or ninja equivalents. (Uncanny X-Men #361)

Jack of Queen of Hearts Death! (Uncanny X-Men #361)

Comedy gold. (X-Men #81)

I’ve missed this dynamic. (X-Men #81)

It’s so easy to follow the motion of this fight even through still images… Pay attention, every modern action director! (X-Men #81)

The three words every woman longs to hear: “I hurrk hkk”. (X-Men #81)

Hairy hugs! (Wolverine: Black Rio)

THE MAN OF HARSH BUSINESS (Wolverine: Black Rio)

My only complaint with this panel is that the sound effect should actually be SHAAARK (Wolverine: Black Rio)

Logan knows how to party! (Wolverine: Black Rio)

Logan continues to know how to party! (Wolverine: Black Rio)

I have questions. (Wolverine: Black Rio)

To this, we can only say: huh. (Wolverine: Black Rio)

“Sorry I didn’t get here sooner. This thing has, like, a lot of zippers.” (Wolverine: Black Rio)

The road goes Wolver on and on. (Wolverine: Black Rio)

NEXT EPISODE: The Hunt for Xavier begins!

As Mentioned in Episode 437 – Dismember the Titans

January 14, 2024 Miles 3 comments

Listen to the podcast here.

“Hot Topic Rennfaire” was a somewhat controversial choice for X-Force’s prom theme. (X-Force #85)

I’m impressed Pandemonia is so well put-together after 600 years in captivity! I was wearing pajama pants by day three of the pandemic. (X-Force #85)

“I’ll never forget that day… Rusty was inexplicably blonde, I was in a costume I wouldn’t have for months, and all was right in the world.” (X-Force #85)

You can tell Sam and Dani are in great shape: they’re having a conversation about feelings and continuity during a run while most of us couldn’t manage more than “*wheeze* *cough*” (X-Force #85)

“This place seems different! Did somebody replace a lamp or something?” (X-Force #85)

…How long have they been posing like that? (X-Force #85)

Nice fight scene, Angel Unzueta! (X-Force #85)

As distinct from prolific video game voice actress Jennifer Hale! (X-Force #85)

Say it, Dani! Focused totality… you know the next part… (X-Force #85)

“We’re here to cast glamours and rock out for Satan, and we’re all out of glamours!” (X-Force #85)

Pictured: Hades in disguise, Hades’s girlfriend, and Hades’s surprisingly detailed and colorful statue of Hades. (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)

It’s no Larry Stroman crowd scene, but still, pretty great! (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)

Cannonball wants to axe Meltdown what she was thinking. (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)

“Well, at least it’s not a, you know.” (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)

To Meltdown’s credit, that lady does seem like she’s about to take a bite out of Cannonball. (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)

“Why were we the members of this team? Well, we happened to all be free on a Tuesday.” (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)

Magic! Flirtation! Fonts! (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)

“Happy tenth high school reunion, everybody!” (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)

Now THAT’S playing the long game. (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)

Don’t feel bad, I always mix them up with the Defenders too. (X-Force & Champions Annual 1998)

NEXT TIME: A very Wolverine Wolverine story.

437 – Dismember the Titans

January 14, 2024 Miles 16 comments

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In which the overlap between Rocky Horror and ‘90s X-Force fans is probably pretty significant; Pandemonia has priorities; the warehouse gets an evil, sexy glowup; swears are great; Johnny Blaze’s motorcycle probably shouldn’t still be on fire; and there is no single definitive X-Men experience.

X-PLAINED:

Master Pandemonium
X-Force #85
X-Force/Champions Annual 1998
What X-Force has been up to lately
The regrettable absence of Doctor Doom
Possession
Community
Cougars (euphemistic)
The thrift cycle
Rusty Collins on Krakoa
Fashion
An eons-old accord between the Houses of Chaos and the Lord of Valhalla
Jennifer Kale
The list
Swears
A statue of Hades
Various appendages sticking out of the earth
Hercules
The mystic power of sarcasm
The greatest fear of a Titan
Monet St. Croix vs. the Count of Monte Cristo
Good X-books for your fifteen-year-old niece

NEXT EPISODE: Wolverine vs. Vampires (again)!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 434 – Return to Cape Citadel

December 31, 2023 Miles Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Happy anniversary! Have a brand-new team! (Uncanny X-Men #360)

The first of a number of Giant-Size X-Men #1-style origin stories. (Uncanny X-Men #360)

In which the long-absent Excalibur mutants remind us of the first team they were all on. (Uncanny X-Men #360)

The All-New, Slightly-Off X-Men attack! (Uncanny X-Men #360)

Meanwhile: all that’s left of the X-Men. Err, the most recent team of X-Men. Not the returning ones. Or the fake ones. Look, there are a lot of different X-Men in this issue, okay? (Uncanny X-Men #360)

Hey, looks like Thomas Wolfe was wrong! (Uncanny X-Men #360)

Who needs panel borders when you’ve got layouts like this? (Uncanny X-Men #360)

Hey, it’s like the last issue’s cover – but with actual X-Men! (X-Men #80)

Comics’ greatest superhero soap opera. (X-Men #80)

Gotta admit, this is not Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau’s greatest showing. (X-Men #80)

A lot’s changed since you’ve been gone, Pete. (X-Men #80)

*raised heavy metal horns accompany a single heavy metal tear* (X-Men #80)

They’ve been back together for only a few hours and are already dramatically posing like champs! (X-Men #80)

“Hey, that’s not Professor X! He has a… you know!” (X-Men #80)

…rocket? (X-Men #80)

More couples’ therapy should include fastball specials. (X-Men #80)

I mean, I know they were kinda jerks, but… jeez! (X-Men #80)

NEXT EPISODE: Our tenth annual Giant-Size Winter Special!

As Mentioned in Episode 431 – Doctor Jennifer Murder’s Drop-In Deathatorium

November 19, 2023 Miles Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Alright, who stuck their surprisingly awesome fan-zine on this comics rack? (Generation X Underground Special #1)

Do the extra-long fingers help or hurt? (Generation X Underground Special #1)

Triumphant walk! (Generation X Underground Special #1)

Cibo Matto! (Generation X Underground Special #1)

“I’m just not sure about this neighborhood. Let’s head over to Crime Alley instead.” (Generation X Underground Special #1)

No notes. (Generation X Underground Special #1)

(Former since the Donut Day Riots) Detective Lucas Bishop. (Generation X Underground Special #1)

Eat your heart out, Jack Kirby. (Generation X Underground Special #1)

You and me both, random gangster. (Generation X Underground Special #1)

And, in fact, that very funk will save the day. (Generation X Underground Special #1)

Chamber’s secondary mutation is to be more heavily inked when he’s depressed. (Generation X Underground Special #1)

If you’re ever this heavily inked, please talk to someone. (Generation X Underground Special #1)

Al made a shirt and so can you! (Generation X Underground Special #1)

Man vs. Man, Man vs. Nature, Beatniks vs. Hostess Fruit Pies… (Generation X Underground Special #1)

Nate is such a good dude sometimes. (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

What an oddly relevantly helpful old woman! (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

Downtown Transylvania circa 1998, I assume. (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

Hey, your face isn’t even all that bony! (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

See, kids? This is why you shouldn’t smoke. (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

She had to wait days for a lightning storm epic enough for her to make her entrance properly. (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

How has no one brought this delightful villain back since this issue?! (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

Didn’t see that one coming… (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

NO NOTES. (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

Doctor Von Mort’s home office is way cooler than mine. (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

Abysnthia Von Mort x-plains Absynthia Von Mort. (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

“Help! We’ve been filed!” (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

I’m not crying you’re crying (X-Man: All Saints Day #1)

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X suits up!

431 – Doctor Jennifer Murder’s Drop-In Deathatorium

November 19, 2023 Miles 4 comments

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In which Synch is a more versatile character than he originally got credit for; “eep” and “eek” are likewise underused; space makes everything better; Nate Grey is the proto-himbo; and if you can decipher the secret code in this episode, you, too, can win a Silver Surfer jet ski!

X-PLAINED:

Diablo
Generation X Underground Special
X-Men Unlimited #30
X-Man: All Saints Day
Jim Mahfood
Skin’s video-game preferences
Strange superpowers
Poster pirates
Visual representations of the passage of time
“Banshee’s Angels”
Charlie’s Angels
The infamous donut-day riots
Perfect costumes
Adequate restraints for small children
The raw power of funk
Generation X vs. the Beat Generation
The greatest disco event in the universe
Nate Grey
Some kid named Jerome
Countess Absynthia Von Mort
Transylvania
Dr. Cindy’s Castle
The state of Phoenix affairs
The color bar at the top of the page in ‘90s comics

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X suits up!

Check out visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!