Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Author: Miles

As Mentioned in Episode 428 – Naked in a Cake

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So who is that in the cake? (Excalibur #124)
A bridal shower! (Excalibur #124)
A bachelor party! (Excalibur #124)
Seriously, why is this a thing (Excalibur #124)
Yep, we’ve missed the Crazy Gang. (Excalibur #124)
Awk-ward (Excalibur #124)
To answer Suzy Eddie Izzard’s question: cake and death! (Excalibur #124)
And then Feron’s life got even worse. (Excalibur #124)
And a good time was had by all… especially Captain UK and Mimic, I assume. (Excalibur #124)
Love and chaos. (Excalibur #125)
Cameos! (Excalibur #125)
More cameos! (Excalibur #125)
I have questions about this pipe organ. (Excalibur #125)
Healthy… communication? Is that a thing in the Marvel Universe? Is that allowed? (Excalibur #125)
WHO INVITED THE NAZIS (Excalibur #125)
And have they ever earned it. (Excalibur #125)
Gatecrasher has the weeds! (Excalibur #125)
Lockheed, I know you want Piotr and Kitty to get together, but I assure you this will not work out. (Excalibur #125)
Nobody does wedding receptions like the Starlight Citadel of Otherworld. (Excalibur #125)
Man, that really is a shockingly tiny invitation. (Excalibur #125)
See, Feron? Just because everyone forgets about you doesn’t mean you have to jump out of a cake to try to murder people! (Excalibur #125)
Saturnyne, this is literally the worst possible time. (Excalibur #125)
Kurt, this is… also not a great time. (Excalibur #125)
Dammit, now I’m tearing up. (Excalibur #125)
And that, as they say, is that. (Excalibur #125)
NEXT TIME: X-Factor is back! Kind of!

428 – Naked in a Cake

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Love and chaos. (Excalibur #125)

In which you shouldn’t invite nazis to your wedding, there’s a lot of multiverse, Captain Britain and Meggan are pretty heteronormative but make it work, everybody forgot Feron, and the next husband will be Gatecrasher’s.

X-PLAINED:

  • Captain Britain varieties
  • The history of Brian Braddock and Meggan Puceanu, abridged
  • Excalibur #124-125
  • Mutants most likely to jump out of a cake
  • The Crazy Gang (again)
  • Meggan’s crush on Colossus
  • Colossus’s guilt about Meggan’s crush on Colossus
  • A surprise bridal shower
  • The return of Captain UK
  • Brian Braddock’s teetotaling techniques
  • Mimic’s ever-changing facial hair
  • Glorious, glorious chaos
  • Poor, poor Feron
  • Multiple awkward conversations
  • The return of Widget and also everyone else
  • Lightning Force (dammit)
  • A lengthy but not exhaustive list of Captains Britain
  • So many cameos
  • …Seriously, so many cameos
  • Dai Thomas’s anti-iron
  • Shockingly healthy communication
  • Bouquet brawls and garter gar-nage
  • A bittersweet ending
  • Nightcrawler’s best outfit
  • The universe where the X-Men X-Plain Jay & Miles
  • Our hypothetical post-finale Excalibur lineup

NEXT EPISODE: The return of X-Factor! Kind of!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 427 – Standard Deviation

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Why doesn’t Adam Pollina draw all the mythology? (X-Force #81)
Just another day for X-Force. (X-Force #81)
You could take away the word balloons and we’d still know so much about these characters just from their outfits and body language! (X-Force #81)
This panel doesn’t have much to do with continuity, but it sure is pretty. (X-Force #81)
Again: JUST ANOTHER DAY FOR X-FORCE (X-Force #81)
Siryn flirts. (X-Force #81)
“Your first clue should have been the rad halo-thing Adam Pollina drew behind me.” (X-Force #81)
We’ll miss you, Adam Pollina. Thanks for the memories. (X-Force #81)
Hi, Jesse Aaronson AKA Bedlam! Hi, Cait Sith! (X-Force #82)
I enjoy how “rebuilt from the brink of death” also translates to “wearing a super-cool set of insectoid armor.” (X-Force #82)
Pollina may be gone, but the action scenes are still pretty awesome. (X-Force #82)
Jesse, that is not how you give a massage. (X-Force #82)
“Sorry we’re late, it took us a while to adequately rip up our clothes.” (X-Force #82)
Yeah, okay – we love this guy. (X-Force #82)
Sam Guthrie X-Plains (his time on) the X-Men. (X-Force #83)
I think your guts may actually be tied up in abs, Sam. (X-Force #83)
Just enough of that yellow and purple left to still make them look like a team – and just enough folks without that uniform to make it clear how long it’s been since those days. (X-Force #83)
You may have thought we were being euphemistic when we said Jesse was sent off to live on a farm – but nope, actual farm. (X-Force #83)
Pig-riding blonde Lara Croft thinks these gentlemen make some excellent points. (X-Force #83)
This sentai team looks mean. (X-Force #84)
Loyalty, punching, and heroism. That’s our Sam. (X-Force #84)
It’s cool, Guthrie – not everyone can be photogenic. (X-Force #84)
Nobody ever gets to finish a conversation in the Marvel Universe. (X-Force #84)
Arcadia has the power to make people look really cool. (X-Force #84)
Jim Cheung does Jack Kirby. (X-Force #84)
NEXT EPISODE: The end of Excalibur!

As Mentioned in Episode 419 – Stuff Happens

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Run, Penance! The retcons are coming for you! (Generation X #40)
Hey, that’s not how telepathy works! (Generation X #40)
I’d be responding with a lot more middle fingers and lawsuits than Synch is here. (Generation X #40)
Monet, I know your brother is super evil and all, but do you really have to be so mean about it? (Generation X #40)
I see someone just earned their Villainous Wordplay merit badge! (Generation X #40)
Huh, that was easy. (Generation X #40)
…as Disney’s copyright lawyers back slowly away… (Generation X #40)
This issue’s an odd and somewhat troubling one, but damn that art is great. (Generation X #41)
Jubilee: from youngest X-Man to youngest Gen X’er. (Generation X #41)
AAAAAAAHHHHHHH (Generation X #41)
And once more I say AAAAAAAHHHHHHH (Generation X #41)
I’m impressed we can tell Emma and Paige apart for once, but what really impresses me is EVERYTHING ABOUT JUBILEE’S HAIR (Generation X #42)
Is… is this how flirting works? Have we been doing it wrong? (Generation X #42)
We’ll get to this. (Generation X #42)
The color of PAIN (Generation X #42)
It must be hard to be Just Some Dude in the Marvel Universe. (Generation X #42)
Why Gaia is probably actually a Neutrino from TMNT, figure 1. (Generation X #42)
Why Gaia is probably actually a Neutrino from TMNT, figure 2. (Generation X #42)
Hi, Elsie-Dee and Albert! Bye, Elsie-Dee and Albert! (Generation X #42)
I feel like Emma makes that face at Sean a lot. (Generation X #43)
This run may be baffling and bizarre, but I can’t say I’m not having a good time. (Generation X #43)
FUN FACT: Did you know that 1996’s Super Mario RPG was the first time Princess Peach, then called Princess Toadstool, used a frying pan as a weapon? (Generation X #43)
Oh right, these guys. (Generation X #43)
NEXT EPISODE: Queering Wolverine with Dr. Christopher Michael Roman!

419 – Stuff Happens

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Run, Penance! The retcons are coming for you! (Generation X #40)

In which the St. Croix family is constructed largely of retcons; Generation X adjusts surprisingly quickly to a massive status quo shift; Psi-War is coming soon to a podcast near you; Snow White – I mean, Bianca LaNeige – has an intriguing but exceptionally minimal backstory; and if you die in this podcast episode, you die in real life.

X-PLAINED:

  • Hellfire Club history
  • Generation X #40-43
  • MillXnials
  • Mercy General Hospital vs Our Mother of Mercy Hospital
  • Ambiguous psionic overlap
  • Nicole & Claudette & Monet & Marius St. Croix
  • The Downtown Stomp
  • Synch, agreeable and bland (for now)
  • Vincent Adultman
  • The nature of Penance
  • A glacial but effective pace
  • Bianca LaNeige, evil Snow White from space
  • Warpy, Stinky, Spiky, Windy, Greasy, Brainy, and Blurry
  • The Enchanted Forest of Oregon
  • Claremont:Body Swaps::Hama:Getting Stuck In Other Dimensions
  • Jay vs. Accents
  • Terminal Dream Syndrome
  • A surprisingly gruesome fill-in
  • An underrated era for Emma Frost
  • Betty & Veronica, presenting like mandrills
  • Zak the Neutrino
  • Albert & Elsie-Dee (briefly)
  • The Dodsons vs Mike Allred
  • Dr. Bronner’s uncredited Marvel career
  • Our coverage of Ultimate X-Men (or lack thereof)
  • Dr. Phil Zimbardo’s xplainthexmen study

NEXT EPISODE: Queering Wolverine with Dr. Christopher Michael Roman!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 412 – Yappin’ and Scrappin’

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And then Cyclops left for Alaska again. (X-Men #71)
Dark Phoenix athleisure! (X-Men #71)
As Piglet and Tigger slowly back away… (X-Men #71)
The past didn’t go anywhere. (X-Men #71)
Between Kelly and Pacheco, that is a hell of a compelling conversation. (X-Men #71)
So, how was the trip to Counter-Earth? What was your favorite part? Didja bring us anything? (X-Men #71)
Battle of the gross bone-spikes (X-Men #72)
Marrow’s online handle is xXBloodReaper69Xx (X-Men #72)
Not a good look, Ororo. (X-Men #72)
Fun fact: every case study in Miles’s college neuropsychology text book was about a brain injury from a motorcycle accident! (Uncanny X-Men #351)
“It’s a hypnotic pterodactyl wearing jorts in a metal box, obviously!!! (Uncanny X-Men #351)
To be fair, they don’t look very nice. (Uncanny X-Men #351)
And yet, Pyro’s insurance company still would have encouraged him to go to Urgent Care instead. (Uncanny X-Men #351)
Where’s Waldo? (Uncanny X-Men #351)
Cecilia has no time for Daredevil’s bullshit… and Daredevil has a lot of bullshit. (Uncanny X-Men #351)
Jay and Miles after recording an episode. (Uncanny X-Men #351)
Oh no (Uncanny X-Men #352)
“Honey, I think the new neighbors may be… weird.” (Uncanny X-Men #352)
“…ya dick.” (Uncanny X-Men #352)
ZIELL ZIELL (Uncanny X-Men #352)
Does “evil custodians” belong in r/rareinsults or r/brandnewsentence? (Uncanny X-Men #352)
Then panel below this shows Miles’s face melting into that time he accidentally deleted his Final Fantasy VI save right after unlocking the Paladin Shield. (Uncanny X-Men #352)
See you in the desert, Sam! (Uncanny X-Men #352)
Jean Grey, action hero! (Uncanny X-Men #352)
It… it’ll be fine. Yeah, fine. Probably. (Uncanny X-Men #352)
NEXT TIME: X-Force goes to Burning Man!

Links & Further Reading

412 – Yappin’ and Scrappin’

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In which Kelly and Seagle’s X-runs begin with immense promise; dark psychic residue gets just everywhere; Storm’s past is literally buried; Wolverine is just saying is all; Cecilia Reyes’s job doesn’t deserve her, and Cyclops and Phoenix are the worst at being normal.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Grey family reunion
  • X-Men #71-72
  • What counts as an Uncanny X-Men #138 cover reference
  • Baggage and also suitcases
  • Steve Seagle’s (scuttled) Phoenix plans
  • Bone whiskers
  • Telemarketer power moves
  • Cecilia Reyes
  • Marrow (Sarah)
  • Sam Guthrie’s tiny ponytail
  • The ol’ wall-of-televisions trope
  • The cost of one banana
  • Sebastian Shaw vs the IRS (maybe)
  • A mostly empty attic
  • Wolverine’s etiquette lessons
  • The dessert claw vs the salad claw
  • The physicality of Carlos Pacheco’s art
  • Cannonball, the grown-up in the room
  • Magneto’s increasingly complicated past
  • Magnus, Erik, and Max (again)
  • Uncanny X-Men #351-352
  • Cecilia Reyes’s return-to-office
  • Intersectionality
  • Pyro, forever dying of the Legacy Virus
  • Daredevil vs Cecilia Reyes’s bedside manner
  • Kevin, Lord of the Jungle
  • Ending conversations by turning into a bird
  • A.I.M.* (*Advanced Idea Mechanics)
  • Crows of Ill Portent
  • A Box of Entity
  • Condors and Cockatoos
  • Logan’s denim proclivities
  • Arcade vs. Mojo

Special thanks to Dylan Higgins for edits and production assistance!

NEXT EPISODE: X-Force goes to Burning Man!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

HAWK TALK – Independent Comics

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This would usually be a skip week, but thanks to some generous donors to Equality Florida, Hawk Talk is back! This week: independent comics!

X-PLAINED

  • What makes a comic independent
  • Superbutch
  • Little Garden
  • 44 Presidents and a Letter to a Cat
  • Finder
  • Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (again)
  • Elfquest
  • Nexus
  • Prince of Persia
  • Love & Rockets
  • Jim Ottaviani’s science comics
  • Wet Moon

As Mentioned in Episode 404 – Marvel UK, Yes?

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And now for something completely different. (Death’s Head II #1)
Death’s Head I, complete with tiny horns and giant tusks! (Death’s Head II #1)
Meet Minion and his terrifying… everything. (Death’s Head II #1)
Dr. Evelyn Necker, wearing more clothing than we’ll ever see her in again. (Death’s Head II #1)
An online meeting in the year 2020? Yeah, that sounds about right. (Death’s Head II #1)
The death of Death’s Head. (Death’s Head II #1)
It’s the feel-good romantic comedy of the year! (Death’s Head II #2)
Ben Grimm, you are a treasure. (Death’s Head II #2)
Stretch and the Tomato, coming to a theater near you! (Death’s Head II #2)
It’s no Last Stand at Gjallerbru, but I love it. (Death’s Head II #2)
“I believe you mean SMEK, Madam!” (Death’s Head II #2)
And now for something completely completely different. (Death’s Head II #3)
My favorite thing about this is all of the things. (Death’s Head II #3)
Meet Tuck. (Death’s Head II #3)
Ewwwwww (Death’s Head II #3)
Okay, it’s a den of horribleness, but damn if this place doesn’t look cool. (Death’s Head II #3)
I… I love this comic so much. (Death’s Head II #3)
Our heroes. (Death’s Head II #3)
YIKES (Death’s Head II #3)
You predicted screaming green melted skeletons..? (Death’s Head II #3)
The last of the Avengers, part 1. They’re all going to die. (Death’s Head II #4)
The last of the Avengers, part 2. They’re also all going to die. (Death’s Head II #4)
Hot Topic, Claire’s, or Orange Julius first? (Death’s Head II #4)
Charnel mark 1. (Death’s Head II #4)
Charnel mark 2. (Death’s Head II #4)
Now that’s how you end a fight. (Death’s Head II #4)
It’s a mad, mad, mad, mad Marvel UK. (Death’s Head II #4)
NEXT TIME: Flashback! And Jay’s back!

404 – Marvel UK, Yes?

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And now for something completely different. (Death’s Head II #1)

In which Death’s Head gets around universes; AIM fails to recognize closed narrative loops; we need more huscarls in comics; time travel occasionally solves the problems it creates; and we bid a fond farewell (for now) to Al Kennedy.

X-PLAINED:

  • Death’s Head
  • Death’s Head II #1-4
  • Marvel UK
  • Death’s Head I
  • Minion
  • Earth-8410
  • The far future of 2020
  • Dr. Evelyn Necker
  • How to dress for time travel
  • Reed Richards’s mother’s name
  • Earth-12892
  • Robin Hood of Future Past
  • Heavily armed nuns
  • Tuck
  • Spratt
  • The Lord High Protector
  • Huscarls
  • Baron Strucker V
  • Charnel
  • A large number of deaths
  • A deft solution to a complex problem
  • Essential Marvel UK
  • Marvel UK vs. Marvel US
NEXT WEEK:
Go outside and touch some grass!
NEXT EPISODE:
The return of Jay!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!