Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Author: Jay

As Mentioned in Episode 324 – Snack Attack

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
So, yeah, there's a lot going on. (Generation X Annual 1995)
So, yeah, there’s a lot going on. (Generation X Annual 1995)
Not who they appear to be, which honestly doesn't even really matter in context. (Generation X Annual 1995)
Not who they appear to be, which honestly doesn’t even really matter in context. (Generation X Annual 1995)
His sovereignty over the Hellfire Club is dubious, but he's definitely the king of shade. (Generation X Annual 1995)
His sovereignty over the Hellfire Club is dubious, but he’s definitely the king of shade. (Generation X Annual 1995)
6_Annual1
Ouch. (Generation X Annual 1995)
Ouch. (Generation X Annual 1995)
Wait, what? (Generation X Annual 1995)
Wait, what? (Generation X Annual 1995)
I still can't tell if this is him not knowing she kidnapped him or telling her that it's fine that she did... (Generation X Annual 1995)
I still can’t tell if this is him not knowing she kidnapped him or telling her that it’s fine that she did… (Generation X Annual 1995)
Well, that's some Silent Hill-inflected creepiness. (Generation X Annual 1995)
Well, that’s some Silent Hill-inflected creepiness. (Generation X Annual 1995)
This party is an odd mix of formality levels. (Generation X #10)
This party is an odd mix of formality levels. (Generation X #10)
Look, it happens to all of us eventually. (Generation X #10)
Look, it happens to all of us eventually. (Generation X #10)
We would read the HELL out of a series about Banshee's Interpol adventures. (Generation X #10)
We would read the HELL out of a series about Banshee’s Interpol adventures. (Generation X #10)
OH HEY WE KNOW THAT DUDE (Generation X #10)
OH HEY WE KNOW THAT DUDE (Generation X #10)
They are a genuinely fun pair. (Generation X #10)
They are a genuinely fun pair. (Generation X #10)
NEXT EPISODE: MOTHERFUCKIN' GHOST PIRATES!
NEXT EPISODE: MOTHERFUCKIN’ GHOST PIRATES!

324 – Snack Attack

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Cordelia Frost is a terrible friend; Mondo is better than the story arcs that surround him; and we’d really love to see a series about Sean Cassidy’s super groovy past.

X-PLAINED:

  • The one who got away
  • Generation X Annual 1995
  • Generation X #10-11
  • A failed seduction attempt
  • Mondo and a plant-based facsimile thereof
  • An emergency
  • The very personal and private journal of Monet St. Croix
  • A party
  • Omega Red (again)
  • Sean Cassidy’s Interpol days
  • An unlikely informant
  • A somewhat surreal monitoring system
  • The Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men Wiki

NEXT EPISODE: GHOST PIRATES!

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As Mentioned in Episode 323 – Baby Talk

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Seriously--they look like little adults! (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
Seriously–they look like little adults! (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
This gag was probably inevitable, honestly. (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
This gag was probably inevitable, honestly. (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
Enter the X-Babies! (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
Enter the X-Babies! (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
I feel like public opinion of Sentinels would go way up if they looked like dinosaurs. (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
I feel like public opinion of Sentinels would go way up if they looked like dinosaurs. (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
Arcade X-Plains the premise. (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
Arcade X-Plains the premise. (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
THIS IS REALLY DARK FOR WHAT IT IS. (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
THIS IS REALLY DARK FOR WHAT IT IS. (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
Is this actually Sinister? We never really find out, but it's gotta be, right? (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
Is this actually Sinister? We never really find out, but it’s gotta be, right? (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
Hooray! (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
Hooray! (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
...that's a lotta X-Babies. (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
…that’s a lotta X-Babies. (Pint-Sized X-Babies #1)
Absolutely iconic cover. (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
Absolutely iconic cover. (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
Damn good interior art, too. (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
Damn good interior art, too. (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
Kirby's art has leveled up exponentially between Murderama and Reborn; I particularly dig his Spiral. (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
Kirby’s art has leveled up exponentially between Murderama and Reborn; I particularly dig his Spiral. (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
Expanded geography of the Mojoverse. (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
Expanded geography of the Mojoverse. (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
Man, I wanna live in a closed-down theater! (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
Man, I wanna live in a closed-down theater! (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
The textbook sisters. (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
The textbook sisters. (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
'Vengers Assembly! (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
‘Vengers Assembly! (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
That it's an obvious joke doesn't stop it from being funny. (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
That it’s an obvious joke doesn’t stop it from being funny. (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
All-New Psychilde! (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
All-New Psychilde! (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
Seriously, who WOULDN'T read about the adventures of Baby Doom? (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
Seriously, who WOULDN’T read about the adventures of Baby Doom? (X-Babies: Reborn #1)
That Skottie Young cover! (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #1)
That Skottie Young cover! (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #1)
Mr. Veech and Nandy. (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #1)
Mr. Veech and Nandy. (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #1)
Good times. (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #1)
Good times. (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #1)
Our first glimpse of the Star Comics characters. (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #1)
Our first glimpse of the Star Comics characters. (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #1)
Planet Terry (Bowdlerized version). (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #1)
Planet Terry (Bowdlerized version). (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #1)
Wally and the Wizard (Bowdlerized version). (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #2)
Wally and the Wizard (Bowdlerized version). (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #2)
Royal Roy (Bowdlerized version). (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #2)
Royal Roy (Bowdlerized version). (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #2)
Top Dog (Bowdlerized but still helpful version). (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #3)
Top Dog (Bowdlerized but still helpful version). (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #3)
The actual, exiled Royal Roy, Planet Terry, and Top Dog. (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #3)
The actual, exiled Royal Roy, Planet Terry, and Top Dog. (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #3)
oh shit (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #3)
oh shit (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #3)
And they all pretty much lived happily ever after, probably, I guess. (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #4)
And they all pretty much lived happily ever after, probably, I guess. (X-Babies: Stars Reborn #4)
NEXT EPISODE: Aging up to X-teens!
NEXT EPISODE: Aging up to X-teens!

LINKS & FURTHER JUVENALIA

323 – Baby Talk

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we spend a large amount of time on a group of small characters; X-Babies stories cover a wide range of quality; Mojo is relegated to public access; the ‘Vengers rebel against their creator; the X-Babies excavate Star Comics; we adjust our opinion of the mid-‘90s; and WandaVision is probably not connected to the Mojoverse.

X-PLAINED:

  • Fun with blood
  • The X-Babies
  • Mojo
  • Pint-Sized X-Babies #1
  • X-Babies Reborn #1
  • X-Babies: Stars Reborn #1-4
  • The Brotherhood of Mutant Bullies
  • X-Baby nomenclature
  • The Pix
  • Hell’s Kitchen
  • The Wildways (more) (again)
  • Monkey Wagon
  • Bubblefield
  • Marshmallow Marsh
  • Gamesboro
  • The Textbook Sisters
  • The ‘Vengers
  • A transformation
  • Mr. Veech
  • Nandy
  • Star Comics and several characters therefrom
  • The Adorable X-Babies
  • Our opinions on the mid-‘90s
  • Welcome to Westview

NEXT EPISODE: X-Teens!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 322 – Do More Crimes

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Never let Gambit take you anywhere. (X-Men #46)
Never let Gambit take you anywhere. (X-Men #46)
Jean, seriously, do you have any idea how old your niece and nephew are? (X-Men #46)
Jean, seriously, do you have any idea how old your niece and nephew are? (X-Men #46)
Bobby, no. (X-Men #46)
Bobby, no. (X-Men #46)
We have X-Babies. This is not a drill. (X-Men #46)
We have X-Babies. This is not a drill. (X-Men #46)
Charming, ain't they? (X-Men #46)
Charming, ain’t they? (X-Men #46)
Wait... who?! (X-Men #46)
Wait… who?! (X-Men #46)
HI, DAZZLER! (X-Men #47)
HI, DAZZLER! (X-Men #47)
This whole issue feels kind of like a Western, helped along by this incredibly classic framing. (Uncanny X-Men #327)
This whole issue feels kind of like a Western, helped along by this incredibly classic framing. (Uncanny X-Men #327)
"Okay, but also, your face is melting." (Uncanny X-Men #327)
“Okay, but also, your face is melting.” (Uncanny X-Men #327)
OH SNAP denied (Uncanny X-Men #327)
OH SNAP denied (Uncanny X-Men #327)
This is legitimately adorable. (Uncanny X-Men #327)
This is legitimately adorable. (Uncanny X-Men #327)
"Y'know... stuff." (Uncanny X-Men #327)
“Y’know… stuff.” (Uncanny X-Men #327)
NEXT WEEK: Hawk talk! NEXT EPISODE: SOMEHOW, EVEN MORE X-BABIES!
NEXT WEEK: Hawk talk!

NEXT EPISODE: SOMEHOW, EVEN MORE X-BABIES!

LINKS & FURTHER MISDIRECTION:

322 – Do More Crimes

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which the X-Babies fail to charm; clones are people, too; Iceman doesn’t (quite) come out; Gambit and Bishop bond; Joseph comes into ambiguous being; and Principal Nezu and Charles Xavier would probably get along okay.

X-PLAINED:

  • Inconsistent quality
  • X-Men #46-47
  • Uncanny X-Men #327
  • The X-Babies (more) (again)
  • Sfogliatelle
  • Gog
  • Gog’n’Magog
  • Politics of the Mojoverse
  • Personhood of constructed entities
  • What makes an X-Babies story work
  • Jay’s favorite episodes of The Muppet Show
  • Age-appropriate literature
  • Fictional books
  • Fun with Bishop
  • Several restaurants
  • Hypothetical casting
  • What Magneto’s been up to
  • Joseph
  • Sister Maria
  • Why Magneto gets de-aged a lot
  • Amnesia
  • Various orphans and individuals affiliated therewith
  • How to keep up with upcoming X-titles
  • A cross-media friendship
  • True Believer: The Rise and Fall of Stan Lee

NEXT EPISODE: HAWK TALK

THE ONE AFTER THAT: MORE X-BABIES SO MANY X-BABIES

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 321 – Revolving Doors

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Damn, those bunny slippers are intense.(X-Force #48)
Damn, those bunny slippers are intense.(X-Force #48)
Please note that Siryn has her own personal breeze. (X-Force #48)
Please note that Siryn has her own personal breeze. (X-Force #48)
"Y... you're not?" (X-Force #48)
“Y… you’re not?” (X-Force #48)
Large. (Uncanny X-Men #328)
Large. (Uncanny X-Men #328)
LARGE. (Uncanny X-Men #328)
LARGE. (Uncanny X-Men #328)
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU FIRST-AID A MAJOR ABDOMINAL WOUND (Uncanny X-Men #328)
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU FIRST-AID A MAJOR ABDOMINAL WOUND (Uncanny X-Men #328)
We may never know why Professor X chose to install Cerebro in a Multi-Axis Trainer, but he certainly appears to have done so. (Sabretooth Special #1)
We may never know why Professor X chose to install Cerebro in a Multi-Axis Trainer, but he certainly appears to have done so. (Sabretooth Special #1)
Dang, that's a lot of drop shadows. (Sabretooth Special #1)
Dang, that’s a lot of drop shadows. (Sabretooth Special #1)
Deja vu all over again. We may never know why Professor X chose to install Cerebro in a Multi-Axis Trainer, but he certainly appears to have done so. (Sabretooth Special #1)
Deja vu all over again. We may never know why Professor X chose to install Cerebro in a Multi-Axis Trainer, but he certainly appears to have done so. (Sabretooth Special #1)
NEXT EPISODE: INTO THE CLONE ZONE!
NEXT EPISODE: INTO THE CLONE ZONE!

321 – Revolving Doors

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Sabretooth does not get effectively rehabilitated; nobody has the moral high ground; Val Cooper is the worst possible person to call in any emergency; Bishop needs a better support system; Jay knows several things about onions; and not everything has to be a mammal.

X-PLAINED:

  • Sabretooth (more) (again)
  • X-Force #48
  • Uncanny X-Men #328
  • Sabretooth Special #1
  • Bunny slippers
  • An intervention
  • Stages of grief
  • What not to do with Sabretooth
  • An evil squirrel
  • Onions
  • The three genders
  • Mutant Massacre callbacks
  • Caption disambiguation problems
  • The overabundance of boobs on fictional non-mammalian species

NEXT EPISODE: INTO THE CLONE ZONE!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 320 – The Accountability Wagon

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
I know the cover blurb isn't actually foreshadowing, but the cover blurb is kiiiinda foreshadowing. (Excalibur #91)
I know the cover blurb isn’t actually foreshadowing, but the cover blurb is kiiiinda foreshadowing. (Excalibur #91)
There's writing a phonetic accent... and then there's writing someone making fun of someone else's accent, phonetically. (Excalibur #91)
There’s writing a phonetic accent… and then there’s writing someone making fun of someone else’s accent, phonetically. (Excalibur #91)
Aw. (Excalibur #91)
Aw. (Excalibur #91)
For your Twitter fight needs. (Excalibur #91)
For your Twitter fight needs. (Excalibur #91)
This is roughly how I react to having to share personal information with colleagues, too. (Excalibur #91)
This is roughly how I react to having to share personal information with colleagues, too. (Excalibur #91)
They're good friends. (Excalibur #91)
They’re good friends. (Excalibur #91)
THE SUBTITLES THO (Excalibur #91)
THE SUBTITLES THO (Excalibur #91)
Creeeeeepy. (Excalibur #91)
Creeeeeepy. (Excalibur #91)
I know his teeth are also supposed to be steel, but they look just off enough from the rest of his face that I can't shake the idea that they're normal teeth, which idea is profoundly and inexplicably unsettling. (Excalibur #92)
I know his teeth are also supposed to be steel, but they look just off enough from the rest of his face that I can’t shake the idea that they’re normal teeth, which idea is profoundly and inexplicably unsettling. (Excalibur #92)
Huh. (Excalibur #92)
Huh. (Excalibur #92)
You sure did. (Excalibur #93)
You sure did. (Excalibur #93)
[Music rises] (Excalibur #93)
[Music rises] (Excalibur #93)
Ah, Rahne. You're such a good kid. (Excalibur #93)
Ah, Rahne. You’re such a good kid. (Excalibur #93)
FUCK YEAH RAHNE SINCLAIR! (Excalibur #93)
FUCK YEAH RAHNE SINCLAIR! (Excalibur #93)
NEXT EPISODE: Same Sabretooth, different day.
NEXT EPISODE: Same Sabretooth, different day.

320 – The Accountability Wagon

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Pete Wisdom is the guy you love to glare at; Nightcrawler is right (and a delightfully complex individual); Colossus has a lot of issues; and Wolfsbane gets the confrontation we’ve been waiting for since the New Mutants graphic novel.

X-PLAINED:

  • Wolfsbane’s powers
  • Excalibur #91-93
  • The somewhat nebulous age of Kitty Pryde
  • Betrayal
  • What’s been up on Muir Isle
  • Organized sports, Excalibur-style
  • Pubs and what happens in them
  • Drinking with Excalibur
  • Shovel talks
  • Phonetic accents, redeemed
  • A fairly one-sided fight
  • Colossus’s issues (more) (again)
  • Anatomy and physiology of organic steel
  • Accountability, trauma, and their intersections
  • An exceptionally cathartic confrontation
  • A hoodie Jay desperately wants
  • Where cold opens come from
  • Whether and how Gambit passes for human

NEXT EPISODE: Same Sabretooth, different day

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!