callbacks – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

As Mentioned in Episode 326 – Son of a Gun

March 21, 2021 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Fun times with holograms! (X-Factor #119)

Oh, THAT guy. (X-Factor #119)

If I had a dollar for every date that ended this way… (X-Factor #119)

Sir, your gun appears to be several cardboard boxes. (X-Factor #120)

Well, that’s going to be a problem. (X-Factor #120)

Okay, but seriously, why is Roma in this, again>? (X-Factor #121)

OH SNAP (X-Factor #121)

326 – Son of a Gun

March 14, 2021 Jay 20 comments

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In which it’s hard to be a hologram; the Internet is terrible and you should probably avoid it; we have no idea how Naze is still alive; this is not your mom’s Adversary (if your mom is Fall of the Mutants); Forge is an order muppet; and Sabretooth is not a great addition to most teams.

X-PLAINED:

Skrulls in American history
X-Factor’s attrition rate
The spirit spell (again)
The Adversary (again)
X-Factor #119-121
Hypercolor(TM) t-shirts
Oblivion vs. masturbation
Mark Trail (more) (again)
Forge’s complicated relationship with magic
The death of X-Factor
Several retcons
The resurrection of X-Factor
(Mis)representation of indigenous cultures in X-books
Jim Jaspers vs. the Adversary
The spirit spell (YET AGAIN)
The Feron of X-Factor
Val ‘n’ Victor
Dubious use of technology
A red herring
The lingering spectre of Days of Future Past
Our tech issues
Reasonable accommodations at the Xavier School

NEXT EPISODE: Cable vs. X-Force

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 321 – Revolving Doors

January 24, 2021 Jay One comment

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Damn, those bunny slippers are intense.(X-Force #48)

Please note that Siryn has her own personal breeze. (X-Force #48)

“Y… you’re not?” (X-Force #48)

Large. (Uncanny X-Men #328)

LARGE. (Uncanny X-Men #328)

THAT IS NOT HOW YOU FIRST-AID A MAJOR ABDOMINAL WOUND (Uncanny X-Men #328)

We may never know why Professor X chose to install Cerebro in a Multi-Axis Trainer, but he certainly appears to have done so. (Sabretooth Special #1)

Dang, that’s a lot of drop shadows. (Sabretooth Special #1)

Deja vu all over again. We may never know why Professor X chose to install Cerebro in a Multi-Axis Trainer, but he certainly appears to have done so. (Sabretooth Special #1)

NEXT EPISODE: INTO THE CLONE ZONE!

321 – Revolving Doors

January 24, 2021 Jay 14 comments

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In which Sabretooth does not get effectively rehabilitated; nobody has the moral high ground; Val Cooper is the worst possible person to call in any emergency; Bishop needs a better support system; Jay knows several things about onions; and not everything has to be a mammal.

X-PLAINED:

Sabretooth (more) (again)
X-Force #48
Uncanny X-Men #328
Sabretooth Special #1
Bunny slippers
An intervention
Stages of grief
What not to do with Sabretooth
An evil squirrel
Onions
The three genders
Mutant Massacre callbacks
Caption disambiguation problems
The overabundance of boobs on fictional non-mammalian species

NEXT EPISODE: INTO THE CLONE ZONE!

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Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 282 – The Tide Takes the Castle

January 26, 2020 Jay One comment

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Hank McCoy is his own worst enemy–and best audience! (X-Men #38)

Bobby Drake somehow experienced the ’90s harder than most of his peers. (X-Men #38)

She’s not wrong. (X-Men #38)

“I, um, think I might have left something in Alaska. Bye.” (X-Men #38)

Every day, Bishop gets a little less enchanted with his heroes. (X-Men #38)

Aw, these two and their friendship. (X-Men #38)

[SOBS IN CALLBACK] (Iceman #3)

Has anyone ever stopped to notice the fact that Bobby Drake is a fucking spectacular sculptor? Seriously, he should be doing THAT professionally. (Uncanny X-Men #219)

William Drake: a jerk then, a jerk now. (Uncanny X-Men #219)

There is no rage like the rage of a man quietly spooning mashed potatoes onto plates. (Uncanny X-Men #219)

HE’S SO AWFUL. (Uncanny X-Men #219)

Aw, these kids. (Uncanny X-Men #219)

Meanwhile, in Hawk Talk! (Uncanny X-Men #219)

Planes are a Summers family tradition; as, apparently, is crashing them. (X-Men #39)

He’s a good kid. (X-Men #39)

A good kid with a good cap. (X-Men #39)

Weirdly, the heart just sort of hovers around outside the boathouse, and nobody can figure out how to make it go away. (X-Men #39)

See what we mean about the difference the right artist makes to Adam X (X-Men #39)

Man, I just want Philip and Deborah to adopt him and basically be the Kents. (X-Men #39)

Y’know what? Sure. Why not? (X-Men #39)

He came back! (X-Men #39)

HE’S SUCH A GOOD KID. (X-Men #39)

NEXT EPISODE: Still not technically Legion Quest!

LINKS & FURTHER DELIGHTS:

When not making our endless nonsense sound good, producer Matt Hunter makes really excellent music, and you should go listen to some!
Jay does not actually write things on hackertyper.com, but he wishes he could.
We covered Rogue’s solo series in Episode 245 – Natural Causes.
This is the plane Philip flew in WWII, if that’s your kind of thing.

282 – The Tide Takes the Castle

January 26, 2020 Jay 7 comments

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In which the Xavier Institute for Higher Learning should really be the setting of a stoner comedy; Garrabed Bashur’s brain is probably 90% porn by now; the tide always takes the castle; William Drake remains terrible; Adam X the X-Treme deserved better; Jay pitches a series; disability is not a boolean and exclusively medically-defined state; and we are all about some weird X-Men tie-in products.

X-PLAINED:

Mariko Yoshida in the afterlife
Moon Talk
Some upcoming X-books
X-Men #38-39
Uncanny X-Men #319
Many unhealthy coping mechanisms
Sinister foreshadowing
Fancy hair
Commcast (Garabed Bashur)
Hawk sex
An exceptionally resonant callback
Intersectional bigotry
The domestic dynamics of the Drake household
The remarkably poignant return of Adam X the X-Treme
The opposite of a Jack London story
An unlikely intergenerational frienship
A novel use of a novel superpower
Mutation as and intersecting with disability
X-Men tie-in products we’d like to see

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor fills in!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 218 – Careful What You Lick

October 21, 2018 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

They are very excited to be here. (Uncanny X-Men #298)

This is exactly how we dress to watch TV, too. (Uncanny X-Men #298)

Ugh, THESE jerks. (Uncanny X-Men #298)

I mean, they were living there anyway, and it’s probably just as well that you saved them from being murdered, but you do you. (Uncanny X-Men #298)

Forge, you have never been reassuring in your life. (Uncanny X-Men #299)

Somewhere, a damp Magneto is skittering around waiting for his new carapace to harden. (Uncanny X-Men #299)

While I get that Warren’s intentions are probably good here, breaking into schools and holding the children while they sleep is generally frowned upon by LITERALLY EVERYONE. (Uncanny X-Men #299)

Look at him evade like a pro. (Uncanny X-Men #299)

BECAUSE WE WERE TOO MENNY (Uncanny X-Men #299)

Hank McCoy for President. (Uncanny X-Men #299)

I wish they just lied continually to Bishop about the modern world. (Uncanny X-Men #299)

Look at all those Xs! (Uncanny X-Men #300)

Forge, settle down, buddy. (Uncanny X-Men #300)

Iceman speaks for us all, here. (Uncanny X-Men #300)

PROFESSOR XAVIER IS KIND OF CREEPY. (Uncanny X-Men #300)

A good hug. (Uncanny X-Men #300)

And that’s why you always leave a note! Or don’t murder Magneto! One of those, probably! (Uncanny X-Men #300)

These villains are not wildly memorable. (Uncanny X-Men #300)

A rematch that’s been a long time coming. (Uncanny X-Men #300)

Even ’90s Cyclops has his moments. (Uncanny X-Men #300)

There’s the mutant metaphor, and then there’s the Jean Grey metaphor, which is related but not identical. (Uncanny X-Men #300)

“Magnets… I’ve had a few…” (Uncanny X-Men #300)

GLOWER. (Uncanny X-Men #300)

And then nobody was ever happy again. (Uncanny X-Men #300)

NEXT EPISODE: The Emma Frost Appreciation Society (feat. Seanan McGuire, Leah Williams, et. al.)

LINKS & FURTHER NONSENSE:

Come see us at Vegas Valley Comic Book Festival!
The delightful PDX Broadsides will also be there!
This episode involves a LOT of references to past story arcs. Here’s where you can hear us talk about those:
- Learn about one of the less obvious reasons not to masturbate with cacti in Episode 78 – The Eye Killers and Other Cautionary Tales.
- You can hear about the beginning of X-Men vol. 2 in Episode 178 – Giant-Size Special #6.
- We covered God Loves, Man Kills in Giant-Size Special #1.
You can see Miles’s childhood X-Men drawings in Jay & Miles Made a Zine About the X-Men, now available on Gumroad!

218 – Careful What You Lick

October 15, 2018 Jay 28 comments

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In which X-Cutioner’s Song may be over, but its repercussions continue; Uncanny X-Men hits a major milestone; superhero comics are and always have been political; Bishop learns to banter; the X-Men gain an unlikely ally; and Magneto remains exceptionally difficult to kill.

X-PLAINED:

Jay & Miles at VVCBF
Uncanny X-Men #298-300
The Acolytes (more) (again)
The Upstarts (more) (again)
Several important lessons
A very fancy room
A very fancy brain
The unpleasant fate of Sharon Friedlander
The all-new, all-different Acolytes
Carmella Unuscione
The return of one of our favorite antagonists
A sick burn
The fate of Asteroid M
Molting
A debate
Graydon Creed (more) (again)
The tentative redemption of Robert Kelly
How to lose a debate with Joe Biden
A large number of prescient political references
Friends of Humanity
How to engage with a fascist in a televised debate
Noah DuBois
Fatale
A generic rural mob
Milan
A narratively convenient superpower
Amelia Voght
Seamus Mellencamp
Neophyte
The gospel of Magneto
A joyous reunion
The helmet that wouldn’t die
Ponytail ethics
Timelust
Several accents
The current state of Rogue’s powers

NEXT EPISODE: All Emma All Episode (feat. Seanan McGuire, Leah Williams, and more)!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 215 – Mon de Orb Uno

September 23, 2018 Jay 2 comments

Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

While this cover may be the first story page, it still follows the general rule of Excalibur covers: It’s funny when bad things happen to Captain Britain. (Excalibur #55)

Aw, they look so fancy! (Excalibur #55)

Alan Davis hair: expressive AND extra! (Excalibur #55)

HIS FOOT POPPED. (Excalibur #55)

Remember this plot thread? Alan Davis does. Alan Davis remembers EVERY plot thread. It is his blessing and his curse. (Excalibur #55)

Speaking of threads… (Excalibur #55)

This is both an excellent disguise and a quality Cross-Time Caper callback. (Excalibur #56)

Oof. (Excalibur #56)

This party is the worst. (Excalibur #56)

Captain Britain X-Plains the Plot. (Excalibur #56)

(There’s a lot of plot.)(Excalibur #56)

On one hand, Sat-Yr-9 is very evil. On the other hand, this is still very satisfying. (Excalibur #56)

Meggan is so badass. (Excalibur #56)

There’s a Monty Python sketch about this. (Excalibur #56)

“Next, you eat the banana, thus disarming him!” (Excalibur #56)

Too little, too late, Nick. (Excalibur #56)

Remember this kid? ALAN DAVIS DOES! (Excalibur #57)

KITTY, NO. (Excalibur #57)

Cyclops X-Plains X-Factor #41-42. (Excalibur #57)

(And so forth.) (Excalibur #57)

I don’t know why this is a thing. It doesn’t actually impact the story in any significant way. (Excalibur #57)

GAMBIT, NO. (Excalibur #57)

These jerks, again. (Excalibur #58)

This is a ruse, except for the part about Cyclops’s secret boot radio, because Cyclops is a nerd. (Excalibur #58)

I really, really want to know more about Margaret. (Excalibur #58)

TEAM-UP! (Excalibur #58)

Amazing what they cover in undergrad chemistry programs these days. (Excalibur #58)

JUST USE THE PHONE YOU RIDICULOUS PEOPLE (Excalibur #58)

And they all lived happily ever after! (Excalibur #58)

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor vs. therapy, with guest X-Pert Dr. Andrea Letamendi!

LINKS & FURTHER MISADVENTURES

You can hear all about Tom and the trolls’ first encounter in Episode 118 – Extrude the Grappling Arms!
Here is one way to defend yourself against a man armed with a banana.
The Brussels Sewer Museum is super cool, and if you get the chance, you should absolutely check it out.

215 – Mon de Orb Uno

September 23, 2018 Jay 11 comments

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In which we finally emerge from the other side of X-Cutioner’s Song; rich people are different from us; Brian Braddock is probably not comfortable with menstruation; Dai Thomas cleans up pretty well; someone FINALLY remembers Sat-Yr-9; Psylocke knows how to defend herself from a man armed with a banana; the (non-Internet) trolls return; and we are fairly sure that Gambit does not actually speak French.

X-PLAINED:

Winzeldorf
Excalibur (so far)
Excalibur #55-58
Lip massage
The death of Alysande Stuart
A banana fight
Alchemy (again)
Many trolls
A fairly joyous reunion
The Brussels Sewer Museum
A fake heel turn
Our hopes and worries for the New Mutants movie
Comics covers

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor vs. Therapy, with Guest X-Pert Dr. Andrea Letamendi!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

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