In which the Beast miniseries is actually a cleverly disguised Karma miniseries; Gateway’s moral alignment remains a mystery; Cannonball rocks some sideburns; there are many reasons to dislike Viper; and every #1 is somebody’s first.
X-PLAINED:
An off-panel death
X-Force #62
Beast #1-3
Karma’s family and backstory (again)
Twin absorption
MacGuffins and/or children
Clearcut and Mindmeld
Unconsciousness
Spiral (again)
Marios
What to do (visually) with six arms
Spiral’s mutates
Some very impressive body horror
MId-fight stalling
Misplaced revenge
Hank McCoy’s multiversal offspring
The history of Karma’s sexual orientation
NEXT EPISODE: Jay and Connor Goldsmith X-Plain X-Plaining!
Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
CONTENT NOTE: Episode 113 contains fairly extensive discussions of fictional violence, including gun violence. If you don’t want to listen to that right now, that is absolutely okay. If you want to listen to it later, it’ll still be here. And if you never want to listen to it, that is absolutely okay, too.
We were on the fence about whether to post this episode today. We ultimately decided to go ahead, for two reasons:
There’s value in routine in the face of tragedy.
There are times when continuing to exist visibly and publicly is itself an act of defiance.
Love and solidarity to everyone who’s grieving right now, and especially to our Florida friends and family, and to fellow members of the queer community.
-Jay & Miles
EPISODE 113: PLAY IT AGAIN, PATCH
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
In which Wolverine gets an ongoing series; the constitution of Madripoor is probably just a list of pulp noir genre conventions; Tyger Tiger is a kinder, gentler crimelord; Jessica Drew gets possessed a lot; the Silver Samurai and Lindsay McCabe are our dream team; Joe Fixit is a font of endless delight; and someone should probably sit Wolverine down and explain how disguises work.
X-PLAINED:
The Murasama
The other Murasama
Life after Inferno
Madripoor
Wolverine #1-10
The Princess Bar
O’Donnell
The hierarchy of Casablanca references
Roche
Razorfist
The Inquisitor
Sapphire Styx
Tyger Tiger
What makes a good solo series
Lindsay McCabe
Wolverine’s signature drink
Possession pants
Silver Samurai (again)
Patch
Bloodsport & Roughouse
Archie Corrigan and his plane
Landau, Luckman, & Lake
Chief Tai
General Nguyen Ngoc Coy
Prince Baran and His Remarkable Pants
Joe Fixit
The worst possible way to celebrate someone’s birthday
NEXT EPISODE: Havok & Wolverine: Meltdown!
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 8/30/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Spoiler: They will be back next issue. (New Mutants #51)
“If they’d learned anything from me, they’d be faking their own deaths!” (New Mutants #51)
DRAMA! (New Mutants #51)
No, the OTHER Plan Omega. (New Mutants #51)
Kevin Nowlan draws a rad Hepzibah. (New Mutants #51)
PROFESSOR XAVIER IS A JERK. (New Mutants #51)
“Well, I should probably see what the study group thinks, but I’m thinking fuchsia.” (New Mutants #51)
Sebastian Shaw takes dress codes seriously. (New Mutants #51)
She even LOOKS like she stepped off a power metal album cover. (New Mutants #52)
HE’S NOT WRONG. (New Mutants #52)
Aw, kiddo. (New Mutants #52)
Fighting xenomorphs, from the look of it. (New Mutants #52)
Love the body language on this page. (New Mutants #52)
We keep saying that this whole era feels like an inexorable escalation toward Inferno, and, yeah. That. (New Mutants #52)
I was gonna make a “subtext: not just for the ladies” joke, but I’m pretty sure it’s just text at this point. (New Mutants #53)
Aw, man. (New Mutants #53)
TWIST! Don’t worry, this’ll come back up eventually. (New Mutants #53)
“…But can you take them anywhere?” Spoiler: NO. No, you can’t. (New Mutants #53)
Magik intimidating Empath is the gift that keeps on giving. (New Mutants #53)
Make good choices, Cypher! (New Mutants #53)
Or, y’know, not. (New Mutants #53)
Sam Guthrie: Everyone’s best big brother. (New Mutants #54)
“I love you, but I have to leave the team because your costumes are SO BAD.” (New Mutants #54)
SO, THAT HAPPENED. (New Mutants #54)
Has anyone else noticed that Doug’s superhero career is basically a series of dress rehearsals for his eventual death. (New Mutants #54)
I genuinely can’t tell if this is a good burn or not: on one hand, the New Mutants’ costumes are objectively way worse; but on the other hand, the Hellions’ costumes are way more circus-y. (New Mutants #54)
NEXT WEEK: It’s hard to be Havok.
LINKS:
If you’re curious about the Starjammers, go listen to Episode 7 – Cyclops Has a Good Day, in which we discuss them at length with Greg Rucka.
The podcast where two dudes watch and review Grown Ups 2 every week is an actual, real thing, which you can listen to here.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 8/30/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
In which the New Mutants return from space; Professor Xavier ruins everything; Magneto is the Craig Pelton of X-Men; Cypher carouses shamefully with Hellfire tramps; Karma quits the team; and we wrap up Chris Claremont’s New Mutants run.
X-PLAINED:
Leong and Nga Coy Manh
New Mutants #51-54
The Starjammers (again)
The paradox of Professor X
Several dramatic speeches
The Hellfire Club for Creative Anachronism
Plan Omega (but not that one)
A fairly epic dress-code violation
Magik vs. Limbo
A very specific bit of fancasting
Best Magneto
What X-fans (may or may not) live for
A well-wrought nightmare
Hellion disambiguation
Doug Ramsey’s Fancy Hair
New Mutants X Frank Zappa
Wacky teen hijinks at the Hellfire Club
Carousing shamefully with Hellfire tramps
A heroic challenge
A counterintuitive heart’s desire
Claremont’s New Mutants run.
Libraries
Emma Frost’s accent
The sounds of blastin’
NEXT WEEK: It’s hard to be Havok.
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 8/2/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
And that’s why you always leave a note. (New Mutants #47)
This jerk. (New Mutants #47)
Meet Sad Darin Morgan Magneto. Next issue, he’ll be bathing his corgi. (New Mutants #47)
For the record: We ran this page by Jamie from the British History Podcast, and he says Robert the Bruce’s outfit is super bullshit (but he said it more eloquently). (New Mutants #47)
What. (New Mutants #47)
Robert the Bruce was kind of a shallow dude. (New Mutants #47)
WHAT. (New Mutants #47)
This raises some questions. (New Mutants #48)
Future Mirage is METAL AS HELL. (New Mutants #48)
More Sad Darin Morgan Magneto. (New Mutants #48)
Note that even in a dark dystopian future, neither Sam nor Dani is desperate enough to wear those awful graduation costumes. (New Mutants #48)
I seriously want to write a one-shot about this Sentinel. MARVEL: CALL ME. (New Mutants #48)
FIGHT THE FUTURE. (New Mutants #48)
Hint: It’s the friend who can turn into a sinister-looking silhouette. (New Mutants #49)
Are they, though? Really? (New Mutants #49)
Katie Power: More badass than you at any age. (New Mutants #49)
There’s no such thing as a happy Magneto flashback. (New Mutants #49)
Did they just not notice the cover? (New Mutants #49)
Whoadang. (New Mutants #50)
Know how we keep talking about Inferno? This is where it starts. This scene. Right here. (New Mutants #50)
This scene is everything. (New Mutants #50)
You’re a good kid, Illyana. (New Mutants #50)
AND THAT’S WHY YOU ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE! (New Mutants #50)
Peak Magma. (New Mutants #50)
HACK THE PLANET! (New Mutants #50)
The first appearance of Karma’s codename. (Marvel Team-Up #100)
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/19/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
And so it begins. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
Dazzler vs. Dazzler. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
We’d make a joke about taking a drink for every X-Men/X-Factor near miss, but you’d die of alcohol poisoning before the end of the crossover. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
Aw, Colossus. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
Not sure why Alanis Morisette didn’t bring this up in “Ironic.” (Uncanny X-Men #210)
Good job Kitty. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
Well, damn. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
There’s something really unsettlingly cheery and Silver-Age about this page. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
No idea who the purple individual is, which is a shame, because they seem awesome. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
STORM, NO! DON’T SPLIT THE PARTY! (Uncanny X-Men #211)
Whoa. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
This is the closest they’ll come to an actual conversation until Inferno. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
Whoops. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
So, THAT happened. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
SO, THAT HAPPENED. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
Dani Moonstar’s powers are METAL AS FUCK. (New Mutants #46)
“My powers are limited to the counterculture.” (New Mutants #46)
Powerlessness and the sense of being able to accomplish too little too late are pervasive themes in the Mutant Massacre. (New Mutants #46)
Everything’s sadder when teenagers are reacting to it. (New Mutants #46)
Well, shit. (New Mutants #46)
How have they not learned to listen to Doug by now? He is ALWAYS RIGHT. (New Mutants #46)
Cold, Wolverine. (Uncanny X-Men #212)
In her defense, everything is in fact well and truly fucked. (Uncanny X-Men #212)
And again. See what I meant about the alcohol-poisoning thing? (Uncanny X-Men #212)
You can, however, take a drink when Storm takes off her clothes for no clear reason. (Uncanny X-Men #212)
First mention of the man with the plan! (Uncanny X-Men #212)
Well done, Wolverine! (Uncanny X-Men #212)
I don’t care who you are: Callisto is better at leadership than you. (Uncanny X-Men #212)
It’s cool. It’s just Thor; we’ll be covering that stuff next episode. (Uncanny X-Men #212)
Psylocke’s psychic projection is adorable and also super creepy. (Uncanny X-Men #213)
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/19/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
In which we hit the first big X-centric crossover; a lot of Morlocks die; X-Factor is a dark farce; Kitty Pryde talks down a mob without using racial slurs; when Doug Ramsey tells you there’s a problem, you listen; and Callisto should be one of the iconic leaders of the Marvel Universe.
X-PLAINED:
Death by intellectual-property dispute
The Mutant Massacre
Mutant Massacres that might have been
Uncanny X-Men #210-213
New Mutants #46
The Marauders
The best way to guarantee the New Mutants’ involvement in a storyline
Limbo fashion
The responsibility of leadership
Wolverine vs. Sabretooth
Psylocke vs. Sabretooth
The evolution of crossovers
Characters we’d like to see more of post-Secret Wars
NEXT WEEK: The Mutant Massacre, Part 2!
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
In Episode 63, we asked you to design the New Mutants some alternate graduation costumes, since the canonical ones… left a bit to be desired. And dang, did you deliver! We’ve collected the first batch here, but we’ll be putting up another late this or early next week (or both, depending on volume), so you’ve still got time to get yours in! (E-mail to xplainthexmen(at)gmail(dot)com, with the subject line GRADUATION.)
Magik, by Nelson Hernandez. (TRUE FACT: Superheroes in jackets are the best superheroes.)
Magma, by Kate Schwarz
Wolfsbane, by Scott Sheldon
Mirage, by Casey Cookson. Casey specifies: “Dani’s “X” is actually the flag for the Northern Cheyenne, I couldn’t find out if she is actually Northern or if she is Southern Cheyenne. If you or your viewers know I’d love to get feedback so I can fix it.”
Magik, by Casey Cookson.
Warlock and Cypher, by Casey Cookson.
The full team, by Mike Becker. I particularly love the many subtle nods to future teams and costumes!
