Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: Skids

As Mentioned in Episode 228 – Thinkin’ Shorts

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
I mean, it’s not that much worse than Botox. (Uncanny X-Men #301)
Of all the people Gamesmaster could choose to bring to the forefront of his mind, he chose these assholes. (Uncanny X-Men #301)
I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING (Uncanny X-Men #301)
Yes, yes, you’ve made some terrible mistakes, Forge – but at least you’re wearing those shorts again! (Uncanny X-Men #301)
Miles would totally buy that action figure. (Uncanny X-Men #301)
This is how you comic book. (Uncanny X-Men #301)
Damn, Romita. Damn, Storm. (Uncanny X-Men #302)
Just repeat to yourself: it’s just a show, I should really just relax! (Uncanny X-Men #302)
Plato called this “the noble lie”. (Uncanny X-Men #302)
You know, I guess that is about how you’d have to angle your hips if you were balancing on one leg because some green-haired jerk from the future cut off your other one. (Uncanny X-Men #302)
Should’ve known that guy was a racist asshole – look at the color of his baseball cap. (Uncanny X-Men #302)
Can’t blame the guy – for being furious or for pummeling Fitzroy. (Uncanny X-Men #302)
Yes, Jay, Kitty looks pretty weird in this panel, but – FEELINGS! (Uncanny X-Men #302)
Dammit, Friends of Humanity, give Madrox his outfit back! And also stop being murderous bigots! (X-Force #24)
Rusty and Skids have been focusing pretty hard on good posture since leaving the New Mutants. (X-Force #24)
Who has the worse employees, Sam Guthrie or Alex Summers? (X-Force #24)
“Thanks for holding me up while I practice my Liefeld kicks, buddy!” (X-Force #24)
Petey the Dog reference: $34.95. Improbable toaster gun: $1750.00. The look on Grizzly’s face: priceless.(X-Force #24)
Magneto is the best at Space Tetris. (X-Force #24)
Boom-Boom and Feral: best frenemies ever. (X-Force #24)
Remember, at least two of these characters used to train with X-Factor. (X-Force #24)
Boom-Boom and Feral: still the best frenemies ever. (X-Force #24)
Fair enough, kids. (X-Force #24)
Jay’s Warlock figure still kinda freaks Miles out.
Next time: our fifth annual Giant-Size Winter Special!

228 – Thinkin’ Shorts

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which it still sucks to be a Rasputin; John Romita Jr. has a solid, if muscular, grasp of anatomy; Jay and Miles are better exes than Forge and anyone; and Cannonball’s many younger siblings have almost prepared him for running X-Force.

X-PLAINED:

  • Peters Parker
  • The Merry X-Men Holiday Special
  • Comic book release schedules vs. J&MXPtXM
  • Uncanny X-Men #301-302
  • Trevor F**king Fitzroy, possibly the worst Upstart
  • Comics Code Authority closeting versus real-life closeting
  • 21st Century Torture Devices
  • Risky mood fonts
  • Robert’s Rules of Upstart Order (this week)
  • Gamesmaster vs. the Isolationist
  • Shinobi Shaw: Good At Sex
  • Russian tragedy (more, again)
  • Charles Xavier and his poor decisions
  • Shi’ar tech support
  • Pants and villainy
  • Racist jerks vs. rhetorical questions
  • TIME PARADOX
  • Weirdly specific contingencies
  • Piotr Rasputin and his justified fury
  • X-Force #24
  • Meaningless (but fun!) timestamps
  • The Friends of Humanity (who are not our friends)
  • Rusty and Skids’ latest arrest
  • Disappointed Dad Sam Guthrie
  • Action vs. public perception
  • Vinz Clortho
  • Domino’s continuing quest to figure out what exactly an X-Force is
  • The dramatic return of… well, you know
  • Spacesuit logistics
  • Numerical universe designations
  • Plastic Warlock

NEXT EPISODE: Our Fifth Annual Giant-Size Winter Special!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 207 – Blood and Metal

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Everyone in this comic book is yelling at all times. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)
There is also a lot of leaping. The early ’90s were very leaping-heavy years. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)
Garrison, you delightful scamp! (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)
That’s right. The Six Pack is named after beer. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)
Grizzly is kind of a delight in this series. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)
Stryfe is ALWAYS a delight. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)
Look at these ridiculous guns. LOOK AT THEM. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)
Every fight in this series is exuberantly ridiculous, and it’s great. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)
Cable is a really, really terrible boss. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)
More leaping! (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)
MORE LEAPING! (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)
Having studied under Cable, Kane knows how to leap into battle. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)
Blood and Metal also does the action-movie thing where the hardboiled dialogue is often vaguely suggestive. (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)
“It makes sense, though. Having an evil clone runs in my family.” (Cable: Blood and Metal #1)
Yes, Garrison. Ninjas. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)
That’s Stryfe; and this explains a thing or three. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)
We forgot to mention this scene in the episode, but at one point, Garrison Kane is just randomly eating a fucking enormous sandwich. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)
And then on the next page, he dramatically rips his shirt off, because, look, SOMETIMES YOU JUST GOTTA. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)
Shorts! (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)
Look, if you haven’t worked out that Stryfe looks like Cable by this point in the series, I’m not sure I can help you. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)
I keep imagining Stryfe yelling, “Brother!” in Liquid Snake’s voice; and now you can, too. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)
“I also got you some unflattering but comfortable briefs. (Cable: Blood and Metal #2)
NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor gets political.

LINKS & FURTHER TOMFOOLERY:

 

207 – Blood and Metal

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Miles has a Dracula problem; we are really, really excited about FlameCon; Fabian Nicieza is the unsung hero of the early ’90s; Jay doesn’t explain the Iranian Hostage Crisis; Cable does not have a good history with trademark disputes; Cable: Blood and Metal is secretly an allegory for the X-books of the early 1990s; friendship and explosions don’t have to be mutually exclusive; and history evokes but doesn’t quite repeat itself.

X-PLAINED:

  • Dracula disambiguation
  • One way to stop a vampire invasion
  • Wang beams
  • Cable: Blood and Metal #1-2
  • The continuing miracle that is Fabian Nicieza
  • Cable (as established in 1992)
  • Stryfe
  • The Wild Pack and/or Six Pack
  • The ongoing evolution of John Romita, Jr.
  • Tolliver
  • Several heists of varying quality
  • Numerous patches and their contents
  • How the Wild Pack became the Six Pack
  • An idiom, examined
  • A total dick move
  • Muscles-and-guns power creep
  • Guns of tomorrow
  • The McNinja point
  • A brief flirtation with Magic: The Gathering
  • A typo that became canon
  • The new She-Ra
  • The new, improved Garrison Kane
  • European nipple lasers
  • Mr. Richter
  • The evolution of Cable

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor gets political.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 201 – Pump Up the Jam

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Listen to the podcast here.

 

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Damn, that’s a nice cover. (X-Men #10)
I mean, one of them is definitely not playing a part. (X-Men #10)
I know, buddy. I know. (X-Men #10)
Wait for it… (X-Men #10)
*snicker* (X-Men #10)
Throwing this in mostly because it’s a gorgeous panel. (X-Men #10)
Not even the end of the issue, really. (X-Men #10)
Wait, wasn’t Jon Bon Jovi blond in 1992? (X-Men #10)
That is some choice sideeye. (X-Men #11)
A little bit louder, and a little bit worse. (X-Men #11)
“Hey, wanna see if we can make the Psylocke/Cyclops sexual tension even MORE uncomfortable?” (X-Men #11)
TFW you’re just thankful the control booth is lined with Mojonium(TM). (X-Men #11)
Toxic masculinity saves the day! (X-Men #11)
Mojo directing his own murder is a little bit creepy. (X-Men #11)
YOU’D THINK ONCE WOULD HAVE BEEN ENOUGH, BUT NO. (X-Men #11)
“Know what would be the worst, though? If we were all characters in a comic book.” (X-Men #11)
I don’t understand what’s happening around Maverick’s crotch; and frankly, I don’t care to. (X-Men #10)
This guy. (X-Men #10)
Can we get a close-up on that caption, though? (X-Men #10)
GOD FUCKING DAMNIT, HARRAS. (X-Men #10)
Thaaaaaat’s our Maverick! (X-Men #11)
It really, really looks like Professor X’s head isn’t attached to his body. (X-Men #12)
Carter Ryking has come unstuck in time, but not really. (X-Men #12)
Aw, man, it’s nice to have a reminder of why I sometimes really like these two together. (X-Men #12)
I mean, Gambit and Rogue are doing okay, so the dysfunction had to go somewhere… (X-Men #12)
ART CHALLENGE: What’s in the file? Fill in those empty pages! (X-Men #12)
And the skeletons are like, “Dude, we’re RIGHT HERE.” (X-Men #12)
While these are all valid concerns, they’d be alleviated somewhat if anyone ever bothered to draw Professor X with a decent wheelchair. Seriously, X-Men artists, DO SOME BASIC RESEARCH ON THIS. (X-Men #12)
Now there’s a guy who knows how to put the “fun” in “funeral.” (X-Men #12)
Yeah, Logan, don’t get into a feels-off with Rogue. You won’t win. (X-Men #13)
Nicieza’s Beast is really, really good. (X-Men #13)
Aw, Jubilee. (X-Men #13)
Show him what he’s won, Rusty and Skids! (X-Men #13)
NEXT EPISODE: A musical interlude with X-Factor!

201 – Pump Up the Jam

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we begin our third podcast century; Cyclops is bi-inclusive; we have high standards for Mojoworld; Dazzler can survive your big-budget horror show; Jim Lee makes his exit; video games that involve Protomen are better than video games that don’t; and plasma is the new magnetism.

X-PLAINED:

  • Carter Ryking and his Very Durable Underpants
  • Fontanelle
  • Jay & Miles Town Cry ye X-Men
  • An upcoming event
  • X-Men #10-13
  • A somewhat disappointing Wizard of Oz pastiche
  • Those who like to go both ways
  • A mysterious, shadowy figure; revealed
  • Several of Cyclops’s uncoolest Dad moments
  • Zima
  • Moist Alley
  • Mojo II: The Sequel
  • The Image exodus
  • Mojonium™
  • An announcement
  • Longshot in the Mojoverse vs. Longshot in the 616
  • A Maverick adventure
  • Alexander Ryking
  • The other Xavier File
  • Warhawk
  • The Ryking Hospital for Paranormal Research
  • A poorly defined power set
  • Technicolor skeletons
  • When and where paper was invented
  • A likely-irrelevant pattern
  • The devil who haunts Stryfe’s dreams
  • Some non-X Marvel recommendations
  • Rusty Collins’s codename

NEXT EPISODE: A musical interlude with X-Factor!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 141 – Reason to Go to the Devil

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. No print this week, but you can contact David to purchase the original!
Bella is slightly suspicious of this whole “snow” thing.
Say what you will about Liefeld, but his craggy, gnarled Vulture is pretty damn delightful. (New Mutants #86)
I was just gonna clip Nitro, but then I noticed the faces in the inset panel. (New Mutants #86)
It’s the Mutant Liberation Front! (New Mutants #87)
Tempo’s hella sweet Fleer trading card.
Cable’s official on-page debut (not counting a “next issue” blurb): (New Mutants #87)
OH, HI, STRYFE. (New Mutants #87)
“Yeah, well, so’s your mom!” (New Mutants #88)
Young lady, you put your feet back on the ground this instant! (New Mutants #88)
Fun Fact: this is in fact EXACTLY HOW HE’S GOING TO DIE. (New Mutants #88)
Cable is so… Cable. (New Mutants #89)
The combination of the visible belly button and the coloring really make it look like Sam’s wearing a pink tube top. (New Mutants #89)
Evil!Sexy!Moira! (New Mutants #89)
NEXT EPISODE: Angel broods like it’s the Silver Age!

141 – Reason to Go to the Devil

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Art by David Wynne. No print this week, but you can contact David to purchase the original!

In which we ring in the new year with Cable’s on-page debut; it’s really the ’90s now; we enter the third major era of New Mutants; what Liefeld lacks in craft he makes up for in energy; we pitch a new “What if–” line; Rusty and Skids are terrible superheroes; X-Factor has probably given up on a lot of things; we speculate at gratuitous length on the content of Cable’s pouches; you have reason to go to the devil; and Cable makes a lot more sense when you realize he’s of, by, and for teenagers.

X-PLAINED:

  • How the Legacy Virus got loose
  • New Mutants #86-89
  • Cable’s on-page debut
  • Rob Liefeld
  • The third major era of New Mutants
  • A shift in the balance of power
  • A comics shop to probably avoid if you time-travel back to the mid 1990s
  • The stupid adventures of Rusty & Skids
  • Yet another Acts of Vengeance tie-in
  • Nitro
  • An accidental prison break
  • Cops, or maybe protestors
  • The Mutant Liberation Front
  • Feet
  • A goody two-shoes man-stealing redheaded werewolf
  • Wildside
  • Reaper
  • Strobe
  • Thumbelina
  • Tempo
  • Forearm
  • Zero
  • Stryfe
  • Stryfe’s armor
  • Spooning with Cable

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor kicks it Silver Age.

You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

No prints this week. Contact David Wynne to purchase the original illustration!

As Mentioned in Episode 132 – Nornheim Lemonade

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
“I mean, seriously, this is how EVERY FIGHT YOU’VE GOTTEN INTO THIS STORY has gone. Are you really surprised?” (New Mutants #82)
Aw, man. Rictor is such a good dude. (New Mutants #82)
Hela: Actually really good at this whole “villainous plan” business. (New Mutants #82)
“Also, I’m super into wrestling.” (New Mutants #83)
AND THAT’S WHY YOU ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE (New Mutants #83)
Volstagg’s kids are so awesome. (New Mutants #84)
Ula and the Savage Swarm! (New Mutants #84)
If you can’t punch pterosaurs, punching the jerks riding them is the next best option. (New Mutants #84)
Let’s have a moment of awed silence for the sheer audacity of Baldur’s outfit. (New Mutants #84)
FIIIIIIIGHT! (New Mutants #85)
Asgard: where you can have a dramatic death and then show up again WITHOUT resorting to retcons! (New Mutants #85)
Evil Dani is EVIL, man. (New Mutants #85)
And that’s how you sound-effect. (New Mutants #85)
Hela, of course, manages to work in one final villain speech. Because she’s a pro. (New Mutants #85)
Considering that Rob Liefeld’s run starts next issue, I’m gonna go with “no.” (New Mutants #85)
Meanwhile on Midgard*, Rusty and Skids basically play out variations on this gag forever. (New Mutants #84)

*Earth
Bret Blevins does draw a pretty splendid Vulture, though. (New Mutants #83)
NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor vs. Celestials!

LINKS:

  • We covered the first half of the Asgard Adventure in Episode 127 – Disaster City.
  • COME SEE US AT VEGAS VALLEY COMIC BOOK FEST ON NOVEMBER 5! It’s an awesome convention, and we will be doing a VERY SPECIAL live show.

132 – Nornheim Lemonade

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Podcast: Play in new window | Download

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which Rusty is an honorary Bluth; we bid a sad farewell to Bret Blevins; Hogan the Grim is probably the best at bedtime stories; Asgard has really tight hat game; Hela is a remarkably competent supervillain; there are some sound effects you have to earn; Rusty and Skids fight the Vulture; and Miles has so many feelings about Thor.

X-PLAINED:

  • Cortex
  • Damian Tryp
  • Our weird 2016 recording schedule
  • Jay & Miles at Vegas Valley Comic Book Fest 2016
  • Recent ResurrXion announcements
  • The second half of the Asgard Adventure
  • The end of Bret Blevins’ New Mutants run
  • New Mutants #82-85
  • The Odinsleep
  • A fairly upsetting board game
  • Volstagg’s awesome kids
  • Tiwaz of the Wastes
  • Many excellent hats
  • Ula and the Savage Swarm
  • Garm
  • Miles’s favorite Fenrir story
  • A remarkably clever villainous plan
  • A signature sound effect
  • Karnilla the Norn Queen
  • Cable’s relationship to Longshot
  • Recommendations for a comics newcomer

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor vs. Celestials, as Judgment War concludes!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!