In which the Phalanx would make pretty fun novelty candy; “B-Plot” implies that we only have 26; nobody will take Jubilee to the movies; Repo Man and Repo: The Genetic Opera are in fact two entirely different films; Storm is a fashion icon; Sabretooth is the monster in the basement; it’s really rough to be the kid on the X-Men; Yuko gives Gambit a shovel talk; and a number of familiar faces return to the page.
X-PLAINED:
One of the many problems with Sentinels
Uncanny X-Men #311-313
Whether the Phalanx is squishy
Robo-Candy
Plotline disambiguation
A cult classic
Carl the X-Cutioner (again)
Creative use of Bishop’s powers
Storm fashion
Technical difficulties
A decision Iceman will come to regret
Bishop vs. Sabretooth
What If Vol. 2 #87
Variations on Iceman’s appearance
Early seeds of Generation X
A night out with Yukio
A heavily euphemized relationship
Xavier’s mutant underground
The Phalanx
A shovel talk
The return of Steven Lang (and some other people)
How Cyclops cries
Cassandra Nova’s signature look
NEXT EPISODE: Additional and Varyingly Literal Blasts from the Past
NOTE: Per our expert source Doctor Internet, what Miles knows as “water weenies” are mostly sold as “water wigglers” or “water snakes.”
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Storm and Polaris: a study in contrasts. And not just the hair. (X-Factor #101)
Guido’s smile is his mask… (X-Factor #101)
…and sometimes that mask falls. (X-Factor #101)
You know how you could tell how much trouble the heroes were in on early seasons of Star Trek: Voyager by how messed up Janeway’s hair was? Havok is like that too, but with angst and stubble. (X-Factor #101)
…and plasma blasts. (X-Factor #101)
We are so, so here for Forge’s pettiness. (X-Factor #101)
Thank you, DeMatteis, for remembering to let Moira mourn too. (X-Factor #101)
You know, now that Forge has gotten over himself a little, he and Storm are a pretty great couple. (X-Factor #101)
Mutant power as metaphor. Yes please. (X-Factor #102)
Not only does Rahne have her freedom and independence back, but she also has one of the best friendships in the Marvel Universe! (X-Factor #102)
It’s the biggest character redemption for Moira MacTaggert until we find out that… eh, that’s probably a little too current to spoil. (X-Factor #102)
“Specifically, it may or may not be a PowerBook 500 series with one o’ them newfangled Ethernet ports!” (X-Factor #102)
He’s been practicing that line in the mirror for months. (X-Factor #102)
The next morning, Forge found a “#1 BOSS” coffee mug on his desk with a thank-you card from Polaris. (X-Factor #102)
God damn, Jan Duursema sure can draw a fight scene. (X-Factor #102)
Polaris has your number, Random. (X-Factor #102)
Crap crap fucky fucky (X-Factor #102)
“And I see you brought your abs!” (X-Factor Annual #9)
Half the cast may be gone, but X-Factor sure still is X-Factor. (X-Factor Annual #9)
“This is my good side, though. It is my butt. My butt is my good side.” (X-Factor Annual #9)
Man, LEGO figures got weird in the 90s. (X-Factor Annual #9)
The Shores of Oblivion feature mist, candles, and PowerPoint presentations! (X-Factor Annual #9)
“This will be much easier now that I’ve finally made it into an actual X-book!” (X-Factor Annual #9)
BOOOOO THIS PLOTLINE (X-Factor Annual #9)
Haven X-Plains Haven. (X-Factor Annual #9)
YOUR FETUS’S FACE IS FAMILIAR (X-Factor Annual #9)
Aww, Guido… (X-Factor Annual #9)
We didn’t talk about this pinup by Steve and Marianne Lightle, but it is delightful. (X-Factor Annual #9)
Not only did Miles have a partially-neon Bart Simpson shirt in the early 90s (as did the much older kid next to him), he also had a truly questionable mullet.
In which we explore the aftermath of Multiple Man’s death; X-Factor has a lot of feelings; it probably sucks to grieve with Charles Xavier; neither power nor responsibility is particularly fun; we finally find out who was trying to kill Polaris; Professor Power makes it to the big leagues; and the ‘90s were one long leg day.
X-PLAINED:
Vectors of Malice transmission
X-Factor #101-102
X-Factor Annual #9
The aftermath of Jamie Madrox’s death
Several ways to grieve
Captain Capitalism and Plucky the Girl Wonder
A foiled robbery
Several guest stars
Multiple Man’s Muir Island years
Several assassination attempts
Some shady government shenanigans
Beatrice Conners (sort of)
A surprisingly muscular astral projection
Haven’s deeply dubious origin story
Professor Power
A surprisingly muscular android
One way to clean a room
Creative uses of mutant powers
Top-ten lists
NEXT EPISODE: Live at FlameCon with Vita Ayala!
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I know we talked about her shirt in the episode, but whatever is going on with Threnody’s pelvis in this panel may be even more upsetting. (X-Men #27)
This all seems a tad hypocritical from a man who literally named himself “Mister Sinister.” (X-Men #27)
That’s our Sinister! (X-Men #27)
The lesions really are EXACTLY the same color as her hair. (X-Men #27)
Why did Lefferts’ data require the use of this fancy viewmaster? WHY NOT? (X-Men #27)
He’s basically glam Charles Xavier. (X-Men #27)
Aw, man. (X-Men #27)
SEE WHAT I MEAN?! (X-Men #28)
Jean Grey was right. (X-Men #28)
SCOTT: I understand what you see in Wolverine. His lust for life, his impulsive nature, his soulful eyes, his sensuous hands…
JEAN: Well, this has taken a turn.
(X-Men #28)
No, but seriously. (X-Men #28)
Don’t. Mess. With. Jean. Grey. (X-Men #28)
THIS IS A TERRIBLE IDEA WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS (X-Men #29)
You’d think the Hellfire Club could afford a decent calligrapher. (X-Men #29)
Betsy Braddock has UNQUESTIONABLY hunted humans for sport. (X-Men #29)
This outfit is amazing. (X-Men #29)
“No, I just didn’t recognize you without your skateboard.” (X-Men #29)
I love how extra Archangel is. (X-Men #29)
Warren, you are definitely not getting invited to Shinobi’s next birthday party. (X-Men #29)
NEXT EPISODE: Haven and her many, many, MANY candles!
Here’s Ben Martin on the Legacy Virus as an AIDS allegory:
I wanted to get a deeper take on the Legacy Virus as an analogy for AIDS. As you’ve mentioned more than once on the pod, it’s clear that’s what the writers had in mind, but I feel it misses the mark in a couple of important ways over the life of the story element.
My first issue with the analogy is that the big stigma about AIDS in the early days was that it only affected gay men, when in fact that was not the case. I was born with a genetic blood disorder called hemophilia, and many of the kids and staff from the hemophilia summer camp I attended as a teenager in the 1990s contracted HIV from contaminated blood products used for treatment. While I was fortunate to avoid the contaminated products, many I grew up with did not, as half of all people with hemophilia in the U.S., including 90% of those with severe hemophilia, contracted HIV. You may remember Ryan White, who did a lot of public outreach about HIV and AIDS after contracting it through treatment for his hemophilia. With the exception of Moira MacTaggart, the Legacy Virus only targeted mutants, meaning it missed the mark on the way AIDS was incorrectly and maliciously used as a propaganda weapon against homosexuals, when in fact it was something that could affect anyone who contracted it. Leaving out that aspect is a disservice to the wide range of people affected by HIV and AIDS in my view. I would have loved to see a human villain use the Legacy Virus to stir up hatred, only to find out they contracted it themselves. Maybe that’s what they tried to do with Moira, but I recall either Beast or Xavier saying it’s likely she only contracted it through prolonged exposure to it while studying it.
My second issue is that, through the magic of comic book science, the Legacy Virus was altogether wiped out (with the exception of a few samples in test tubes that popped up in an X-Force run as far as I know). My friends who are still living with HIV and AIDS today do so with a decreased quality of life and tons of medication. They are, fortunately, alive, but their lives are not what they were before. That’s a smaller nitpick, but I personally think it would have been really interesting to see characters contract the virus, receive the cure, but still be living with some consequences of the disease in some way, whether it be a change to their mutant powers or just poor health in general or something like that.
On a side note, if you can find it, there’s a fantastic 2010 documentary called “Bad Blood: A Cautionary Tale” currently available on Amazon Prime that explores the impact of HIV on the hemophilia community. It’s very powerful and is an important story.
In which Jay proposes a new way of comparing superheroes; Beast faces an ethical dilemma; Mister Sinister has an Xavier moment; Sabretooth is a terrible houseguest; Cyclops totally gets what you see in Wolverine; Psylocke would absolutely be into hunting humans for sport; Sage probably vapes; rich people are definitely not like us; Shinobi Shaw is his own best friend; and Classic X-Men backup stories are canonical as hell.
X-PLAINED:
Blue Team vs. Gold Team
X-Men #27-29
Threnody
The fate of Infectia
One of Mister Sinister’s favorite aliases
Dr. Gordon Lefferts
Several complicated choices
A very frustrating cover
A secret meeting
The dubious evolution of Charles Xavier
Communication
An invitation
A sick burn
Rich people
The key to happiness
The theoretical adventures of Honey Badger and Princess Powerful
NEXT EPISODE: Val Cooper joins a cult!
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In which Magneto may or may not own a Namor body pillow; Cyclops probably doesn’t color-code his files; Colossus is Not Okay; bats are nature’s flashers; there are a lot of reasons to be mad at Fatal Attractions; Charles Xavier is surprisingly durable; the X-Men know their Aeschylus; Jean Grey goes in through the face; and bringing Wolverine to fight the guy who controls metal was probably not a great idea.
X-PLAINED:
Mutant Alpha
Uncanny X-Men #304
X-Men #25
False foreshadowing
Costume storage and display
Relative moral event horizons
The character dehabilitation of Magneto
The Magneto Protocols
How Cyclops organizes his files
An excellent eulogy
The complicated legacy of Illyana Rasputin
Several noteworthy absences
A memorable funeral
The ‘behold’ thing
A protective mesh of electromagnetic fire
A well-played callback
A strategically dubious plan
Several Prometheus Bound quotations
An uncharitable assumption
The blood-brain barrier
A severe costume injury
The definitive scene of Fatal Attractions
The root of Onslaught
Which X-Men would podcast
Our preferred comics formats
NEXT EPISODE: Colossus still can’t catch a break
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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
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In which X-Men Unlimited begins; Cyclops’s powers remain wildly inconsistent; electromagnetic fields are the gamma rays of the early ‘90s; Siena Blaze should probably take some science courses; Magneto is a complex dude; and the Marvel Universe could really use adequate mental healthcare.
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
