Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

182 – Lunch With Technet

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Alan Davis spins dangling plot threads into gold; comics artists are storytellers; Technet is a feature, not a bug; Brian Braddock’s issues reach their boiling point; if you’re going to learn about Earth from TV, you should probably stick with PBS; and our Lila Cheney t-shirts are officially canon!

X-PLAINED:

  • An unlikely alliance
  • Jay & Miles at Emerald City Comic Con
  • Alan Davis’s return to Excalibur
  • Excalibur #42-44
  • Breakfast with Excalibur
  • Hard-Boiled Henry
  • Horatio Cringebottom
  • Bert
  • Earth-148 (Ee’rath)
  • Kylun (Colin McKay)
  • Unlikely houseguests
  • A romance
  • A fracas
  • The trial of Captain Britain
  • Multiversal moral relativity
  • Micromax (Scott Wright)
  • Lunch with Technet
  • Why public television funding is important
  • How Shadowcat’s phasing interacts with extreme temperatures
  • Our opinions on X-Men: Gold Annual #1

NEXT EPISODE: Omega Red!


Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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181 – Badgers Everywhere

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which X-Force is the cotton candy of comics; Jay & Miles overanalyze; eye spots are not the new domino masks; Feral is all about some murder; Black Tom and Juggernaut remain a delightful criminal power couple; Siryn’s costume is on point; over the edge is where we live; Jay gets briefly and intensely into Todd McFarlane; nothing will convince us that Fabian Nicieza did not know exactly what he was doing; and Kelly Thompson is a national treasure.

X-PLAINED:

  • Rumekistan
  • X-Force #1-4
  • Spider-Man #16
  • Leaping, both literal and metaphorical
  • Cannonball
  • Boom Boom
  • Cable
  • Domino
  • Warpath
  • Feral
  • Shatterstar
  • Siryn (Theresa Cassidy) (again)
  • MLF
  • The second and third-best-selling issues of all time
  • The Profit$
  • A very violent catchphrase
  • Chalet Shwartzkopf
  • Power Poses™ with Gideon™
  • The All-New, All-Different Weapon X (Garrison Kane)
  • 6-Pack
  • Good vs. Awesome
  • George Washington Bridge
  • A moment so dramatic that it produces a second Shatterstar in a single panel
  • Some sports stuff, kind of
  • Uncomfortable anachronism
  • The stylistic necessity of healing factors
  • Marvel Unlimited view options
  • Rogue and Gambit

NEXT EPISODE: The not remotely triumphant return of Technet!


Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

180 – Lawful Badass

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Jay is deeply invested in The Gifted; Trevor Fitzroy is generally inexcusable; there are a lot of reasons to be uncomfortable in the Hellfire Club; the mix just got altered in this little clambake; Jean Grey (kind of) dies (again); Earth-1191 gives the Age of Apocalypse some glam competition; Lucas Bishop is a pretty decent metaphor for fan culture; everyone is probably Kang the Conqueror; and now Miles really has no excuse for not watching The Prisoner.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Chronomancer and his Chronobots
  • The Gifted
  • Lucas Bishop’s creative origins
  • Trevor Fitzroy
  • Goatee Theory
  • X-Factor #67
  • Uncanny X-Men #281-283
  • Dapper Lesbian Shinobi Shaw
  • A briefly useful mnemonic
  • Cybernetic fuckboys
  • The return of Warren Kenneth Worthington III’s hair
  • Beef and Bevatron
  • The deaths of the Hellions
  • Warhammer
  • Some of the challenges of X-Plaining the ’90s
  • Bringing a knife to a Sentinel fight
  • Bantam
  • A bunch of bad guys from the future
  • Bishop
  • Randall
  • Malcolm
  • Earth-1191
  • The Gamemaster
  • X-Men we’d like to see come out as trans (revisited)
  • Whether either or both of us are Kang the Conquerer

NEXT EPISODE: Pouches and Guns


Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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179 – Sincerely, An Evil Individual

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which X-Factor gets a revamp; Larry Stroman is the best part of 1991; Havok used to have principles; Multiple Man is his own worst enemy; Jay’s Doonesbury knowledge finally becomes relevant; Strong Guy breaks the Washington Monument; and Val Cooper may or may not have married Mister Sinister.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Madrox who got away
  • Alan Disambiguation
  • The X-Factor that might have been
  • X-Factor #71-75
  • Banter™
  • A small selection of a gratuitously large volume of pop-culture references
  • An evil individual
  • One of the many deaths of Multiple Man
  • Larry Stroman extras
  • Professor Vic Chalker
  • A Sinister scheme
  • The iteration of X-Factor most likely to end up naked on television
  • Your real-life Jamie Madrox reference
  • GeeCees
  • A canonical Doonesbury reference
  • One way to get out of writing a term paper
  • The proper plural of Madrox
  • Ricochet
  • The Nasty Boys
  • Death by irony
  • The evolution of Magik’s Soul Sword
  • Why female superheroes rarely date civilian men

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

178 – Giant-Size Special #6

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we enter a new era of X-Men; Magneto reluctantly returns to villainy; Jay tries to like X-Men volume 2; when in doubt, you should open your story with a space fight; Nick Fury has so many pouches; experimenting on babies unsurprisingly backfires; psychic powers are pink; Claremont deserved better; Producer Matt makes his on-air debut; and you (yes, you!) are once again the recipients of a Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau Award for Excellence in X-Cellence.

X-PLAINED:

  • Loa
  • The 1991 relaunch of X-Men
  • X-Men vol. 2 #1-3
  • Chris Claremont’s departure from Marvel
  • X-Men vs. Uncanny X-Men
  • Blue Team
  • Gold Team
  • Why Magneto is emblematic of Claremont’s vision for the X-Men
  • Why there are so many copies of X-Men #1
  • How comics sales are counted
  • Our very different perspectives on X-Men #1
  • A space fight
  • Revision vs. reversion
  • What may or may not be in Nick Fury’s pouches
  • Daring loungewear worn well
  • Fabian Cortez
  • Flatscans
  • Disproportionate escalation
  • The Acolytes
  • Delgado, kind of, maybe
  • Several notable absences
  • The Magneto Protocols
  • That one time Magneto got turned into a baby
  • Some dubious science
  • A semi-invisible plane
  • Code Silver
  • Further miracles of magnetism
  • Producer Matt Hunter
  • Chiptunes
  • Podcasting about video games
  • The Fourth Annual Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau Awards for Excellence at X-Cellence
  • Best X-Toon holiday episodes

NEXT EPISODE: Havok gets a job!


Special thanks to Cordelia for her help on the episode opening!


Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

177 – The Less You Know

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we discuss several Very Special Issues; the real cautionary tale is not to trust Hank McCoy; horses are vehicles of lies and heartbreak; the X-Men shill for a state fair; whatever you’re doing, Cyclops is here to stop you; smoking is a gateway to some really weird vices; and we want YOU to design the latest X-Men PSA!

X-PLAINED:

  • The alternate-timeline terrible choices of Hank McCoy
  • Our wholly unfounded theories about Spongebob Squarepants
  • Be X-Tra Safe With Blockbuster KidPrint and the X-Men
  • VHS tapes
  • Blockbuster KidPrint
  • Mariano Nicieza
  • Some Fundamental Problems With Superhero PSAs
  • A man who may or may not be D-Man
  • Terrence
  • Why Cable should deliver more PSAs
  • Why D.A.R.E. doesn’t work
  • Varying coherent cautionary tales
  • The Uncanny X-Men at the State Fair of Texas
  • A tragic lack of carnies
  • Danny the centaur and his very intense feelings about horses
  • Several exciting attractions at the State Fair of Texas
  • Big Tex
  • Activities
  • Smokescreen
  • Bret Jackson
  • Some of the lesser-known danger of smoking
  • Whether Danny Rand can turn into a centaur
  • Hanging out and other gateways to delinquency
  • The South Side Social Club
  • Jake
  • Etiquette of following teenagers around
  • A villainous plan so ineffective that it’s actually kind of sad
  • X-Men you should hire for your PSAs
  • Our thoughts on the Disney/Fox merger
  • Where to find Bloodstorm
  • Baby Jumping

NEXT EPISODE: Giant-Size Winter Special!


LISTENER CHALLENGE: Send your X-Men PSAs to [email protected] with the subject PSA by December 27!


You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

176 – My Flashback With Andre

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we were on public radio; it’s probably best just to ignore Romulus; Miles still hasn’t seen the Prisoner and should be very ashamed of himself; toy licensing is the stuff of nightmares; you can upgrade your bloodbath for an additional $1.25; Jay may or may not have family ties to Weapon X; we are suckers for die-cut covers; Wolverine knows how to commit to a gag; and you have some pretty remarkable dreams.

X-PLAINED:

  • Wolverine’s CIA contacts
  • Murder-related birthday traditions
  • Wolverine #48-50
  • The ship Righteous Indignation and the ‘ship Righteous Indignation
  • Wolverine size creep
  • Injudicious footwear
  • Serial sidekicks
  • Miles’s continual failure to watch The Prisoner
  • The Summers Crash model of flashbacks
  • Panties and/or grenades
  • Several varyingly reliable flashbacks
  • How memory works
  • Mastodon
  • Andre
  • How memory doesn’t really work
  • Kids’ toy licensing
  • Quasimodo’s hangout
  • Women in Refrigerators
  • Secret agent skills
  • The Dalton school of argument
  • A legitimately cool cover gimmick
  • Wolverine vs. the Helicarrier
  • Adamantium handicrafts
  • Shiva (but not that one)
  • Silver Fox (again) (kind of)
  • A cataclysmic memory backlash
  • Antarctic X-Hijinks
  • Jay & Miles’s adventures in YOUR DREAMS

NEXT EPISODE: Centaurs of Texas


CORRECTION: Kyle Rayner’s girlfriend was the source of the Women In Refrigerator’s trope–not Hal Jordan’s, as Jay stated in this episode.


You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

175 – Lady Windermere’s Fan Club

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Gambit is transatlantically terrible; Rick Leonardi is the poor man’s Alan Davis (but in a good way); we try and fail to care about British royals; Miles should probably read some Oscar Wilde already; Jay has a lot of feelings about The Rocketeer; Shadowcat gets a genuinely stylish costume; and we would read the hell out of a series about Destiny, Mystique, and Wolverine’s WWII adventures.

X-PLAINED:

  • Why Gambit isn’t welcome in the United Kingdom
  • X-Men: True Friends #1-3
  • The poor man’s Alan Davis
  • Trad night
  • Laird Alasdhair Kinross and his nonthreatening but convenient heterosexuality
  • Inexplicably absent familial relationships
  • Queen Lilibet the Second
  • Lady Regina Windermere
  • Several notable British fascists of the 1930s
  • A snazzy airplane
  • Several nefarious plots
  • Formal pajamas
  • The mystery of the Hypercolor™ kilt
  • A large number of strong feelings about The Rocketeer
  • Kitty Pryde’s best costumes
  • Weaponized cosmic queerness (again)
  • Power, agency, and the Dark Phoenix Saga
  • How characters end up with their specific mutations.

NEXT EPISODE: Wolverine, again.


You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

174 – Ed Piskor’s Grand Design

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Jay sits down with cartoonist Ed Piskor to talk about the upcoming X-Men: Grand Design!

NEXT EPISODE: X-Men: Gal Pals!


The visual companion to this episode can be found in X-Men: Grand Design #1, available from your local comics shop this December!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

173 – The Muir Island Saga, Part 2

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Abs-lantis will not be denied; “slightly traumatized” is basically the default state of Xavier’s original students; we pick up the slack for Nicieza; Banshee and Moira MacTaggert probably have an active and varied love life; Xavier miscounts the X-Men; we look back over the Claremont/Simonson era of the X-Universe; and Jay makes a case for the re-resurrection of Jean Grey.

X-PLAINED:

  • X-Men: Red
  • Namor’s beard
  • The conclusion of the Muir Island Saga
  • Uncanny X-Men #280
  • X-Factor #70.
  • Cool orange spacesuits that make you immune to telepathy
  • Off-brand Magneto hats
  • Literary terrors of our childhoods
  • Agents DeMarco & Heacock (R.I.P.)
  • Casual use of nuclear weaponry
  • The cavalry
  • The end of the Shadow King
  • The most dysfunctional timeline
  • Uncanny X-Men #200-278
  • The case for an eclectic X-Universe
  • X-Campus
  • Resurrections, and when they do and don’t work

NEXT EPISODE: Ed Piskor’s Grand Design


The visual companion to this episode will be up sometime before the end of 2017, by which point Jay’s lungs will hopefully be working again. Yay?

(Seriously, though, fuck this cold. Fuck this cold so much.)

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)