Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: Joseph

As Mentioned in Episode 451 – Meanwhile in Another Dimension

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Spoiler: No. (Uncanny X-Men #368)
I need a black-and-white numbered legend for this panel. (Uncanny X-Men #368)
HAMMER PANTS (Uncanny X-Men #368)
And now, for something completely different. (Uncanny X-Men #368)
Specifically, this. (Uncanny X-Men #368)
Well, then. (X-Men #88)
“Good lord!” (X-Men #88)
The Trion. (X-Men #88)
Alan Davis’s Black Tom Cassidy is a looker. (X-Men #88)
Coooooool (X-Men #88)
Storm and Ororo. (Uncanny X-Men #369)
Tentacles from the tentacle dimension. (Uncanny X-Men #369)
THEY WENT IN THROUGH THE FACE (Uncanny X-Men #369)
The Trion, revisited. (Uncanny X-Men #369)
I fuckin’ love it when anyone carries Wolverine like this. (Uncanny X-Men #369)
Juggernaut vs. Jugger-not. (Uncanny X-Men #369)
Whoops. (Uncanny X-Men #369)
NEXT EPISODE: Magneto Rex!

 

451 – Meanwhile in Another Dimension

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In which we remain fascinated by Magneto’s robot butler; murder is Logan’s love language; the Juggernaut punches a hole in reality; Professor Xavier makes it weird; and Storm lectures several gods.

X-PLAINED:

  • Silly mutant powers
  • Uncanny X-Men #368-369
  • X-Men #88
  • Alan Davis’s X-Men run
  • Magneto’s robot butler
  • Joseph’s funeral
  • Nun-sense
  • A voyage to another dimension
  • Eyebrow power
  • Ejulp
  • The Trion
  • The other Gem of Cyttorak that’s like the first one but somehow worse
  • Several comas
  • Juggernaut vs. Juggernaut
  • Evil, kind of
  • Vacationing with X-Men characters
  • Illyana Rasputin and Rachel Summers

NEXT EPISODE: Magneto Rex

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As Mentioned in Episode 445 – Dick War

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This cover, man. (X-Men: The Magneto War #1)
Rogue’s dream bikini. (X-Men: The Magneto War #1)
His powers are just icky. (X-Men: The Magneto War #1)
Please enjoy Nightcrawler’s adorable pajamas. (X-Men: The Magneto War #1)
That’s… that’s not Trish Tilby. (Uncanny X-Men #366)
…what… (Uncanny X-Men #366)
Magneto knows from villainous lairs. (Uncanny X-Men #366)
Ferris is a cutie. (Uncanny X-Men #366)
NEXT EPISODE: Magneto wins.

LINKS & FURTHER ADVICE

 

445 – Dick War

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In which not every story needs to be an event; Alan Davis returns to the X-line; X-mansion security is not what it once was; Rogue needs some new fantasies; and Magneto wants a country.

X-PLAINED:

  • A poor governance decision
  • X-Men: The Magneto War #1
  • Uncanny X-Men #366
  • Astral demerits
  • A very dramatic dream
  • The yolk of oppression
  • Several Acolytes
  • Nightcrawler’s nightcap
  • Our standards for advertisers
  • Suburban Magneto
  • Ferris
  • Magnet problems
  • Forged DNA
  • Mutants from Georgia, Florida, and Indiana
  • Flying with Storm

NEXT EPISODE: Magneto wins.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 417 – Pterodactyl with a Gun

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Rogue anxiety dreams like nobody’s business. (Uncanny X-Men #353)
We call this move the “Lois Lane.” (Uncanny X-Men #353)
I love it when people remember that the Xavier School is–at least ostensibly–a real school. (Uncanny X-Men #353)
WOLVERINE, WHAT THE HELL?!? (Uncanny X-Men #353)
Not the best place to hide incredibly sensitive mechanical equipment, y’all. (Uncanny X-Men #353)
This is supposed to be a clever bait-and-switch, but that hand is fairly obviously not Rogue’s. (Uncanny X-Men #353)
He sure is. (Uncanny X-Men #353)
Valid question, buddy. (Uncanny X-Men #354)
Sauron’s current whereabouts, X-Plained. (Uncanny X-Men #354)
Continued from previous. (Uncanny X-Men #354)
Fuckin’ Marvel Canadians. (Uncanny X-Men #355)
Remember answering machines? (Uncanny X-Men #355)
Yes, excellent. (Uncanny X-Men #355)
Hi, brainwashed Alpha Flight! (Uncanny X-Men #355)
This sequence is objectively perfect. (Uncanny X-Men #355)
Jean, you REALLY don’t spring that costume on someone. (Uncanny X-Men #354)
…Fair, though. (Uncanny X-Men #355)
NEXT EPISODE: this whole mess

417 – Pterodactyl with a Gun

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In which you, too, can use Cerebro; Jubilee is here, for some reason; the Xavier School should absolutely not be accredited; Hulk Hands would solve many of Rogue’s problems; Sauron gets a gun; Psylocke pulls a Lois Lane maneuver; you really shouldn’t spring a Phoenix costume on anybody; Joseph has (another) identity crisis; and Canada has problems.

X-PLAINED:

  • Miles at SDCC
  • Uncanny X-Men #353-355
  • X-Men #73
  • A running motif
  • Wolverine’s sons
  • Margaret Stone
  • “fun”
  • The location of the original X-jet
  • A red herring
  • Sauron (more) (again)
  • Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy… in space!
  • How to ship a pterodactyl
  • Mighty appendages
  • The Agee Institute
  • Boundaries
  • Wallpaper
  • Joseph (more) (again)
  • New Year’s Resolutions
  • Sebastian Shaw and his wraith buddy (again)
  • The X-Men’s answering machine
  • What Wolverine does
  • Alpha Flight
  • Canada problems
  • A crossover
  • Phoenix problems
  • Jean Grey’s ‘90s costume
  • Found families
  • What makes the Dark Phoenix Saga an X-Men story

NEXT EPISODE: Reignfire, resolved!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 400 – Loud Noises

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Marauders to the left of me, X-Men to the right, and I’m stuck in the middle with you… (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Listen, Gambit, it was either this or a Tupperware(TM) for that chunk of your brain. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Their relationship seems healthy. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Eh, it’s still in better shape than the car Miles drove in high school. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Where? Oh, there. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
“He’s here again, Professor.” (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Speaking of different eras of the X-Men – check out Julian Totino Tedesco’s decade variant covers! Here’s the 60s… (All-New X-Men #18)
The 70s… (All-New X-Men #18)
The 80s… (All-New X-Men #18)
The 90s… (All-New X-Men #18)
…and the 2000s. (All-New X-Men #18)
After this, it’s off to the Justice Exhibit through the Justice Hall and then to the Justice Shop. If anyone needs the Little Justice’s Room, it’s on the left. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Thunderbird, sure… but a version of Blink from an alternate universe? (Uncanny X-Men #350)
NOOOOORM! (Uncanny X-Men #350)
I’ve never been picked during jury selection, but I’m pretty sure this is how trials work, right? (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Rogue x-plains Gambit’s dark secret. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
As little sense as Rogue’s decision makes, damn if Joe Madureira (or Andy Smith?) doesn’t make it work anyway. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Erik the Red was really Erik the Red and Purple! (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Okay, okay – they’re no Cyclops, Wolverine, Storm, Colossus, Nightcrawler, and Thunderbird, but I like them anyway. (X-Men #70)
Dig that speech bubble transition. (X-Men #70)
Cecilia Reyes and Marrow, best of friends. (X-Men #70)
Why don’t more artists work in the telekinetic Phoenix flare? (X-Men #70)
Cecilia takes charge. (X-Men #70)
And you know Sam will 100% pay them back later. (X-Men #70)
I love these three. (X-Men #70)
The cavalry arrives. (X-Men #70)
For once, too much dialogue is a good thing. (X-Men #70)
Gross mutant powers are the best mutant powers. (X-Men #70)
Maggott 2.0, courtesy Joe Kelly. (X-Men #70)
The X-Men: often at their best when their lives are at their worst. (X-Men #70)
NEXT TIME: Generation X vs. Christmas.

NOTES & FURTHER READING:

400 – Loud Noises

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which legacy numbering is best left alone; all roads lead to the Antarctic; we finally learn Gambit’s big secret; Erik the Red gets yet a third identity; no one soils the Juggernaut; Maggott saves the day; and we have somehow made (technically more than) 400 of these things.

X-PLAINED

  • Spat
  • The tragic loss of the Cyber Comics
  • How not to back up your work
  • Uncanny X-Men #350
  • X-Men #70
  • A shambles
  • What’s been happening since Operation Zero Tolerance
  • A very fancy cover
  • Insufficient outerwear
  • Senses
  • Justice as a decorating theme
  • Baffling statuary
  • The return of Erik the Red
  • Erik the Red (again)
  • Ferris
  • Gambit’s big secret
  • A large number of continuity errors
  • A total dick move
  • De-icing
  • Untitled Marrow Game
  • A big fight
  • Living room surgery
  • Legal documents
  • Favorite anniversary issues
  • Dangling plot threads

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X vs. Christmas

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 398 – Shanna the Wee Devil

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
We would never, Maggott. (Uncanny X-Men #347)
Grovel, allergic to sticks. (Uncanny X-Men #347)
Spat: just your average reverse-aging cavegirl bounty hunter. (Uncanny X-Men #347)
Weirder or less weird than the time the Morlocks healed Professor X and then dressed him in bondage gear? (Uncanny X-Men #347)
Big Mother Truckers no more. (Uncanny X-Men #347)
Alas, poor Landscape! I barely knew him, Joseph: a fellow of infinite power, of most excellent colors. (Uncanny X-Men #347)
Nanny’s great and all, but LOOK AT THAT BAT! (Uncanny X-Men #347)
I wish we got to see more of that robo-dragon in the back. (Uncanny X-Men #348)
Thankfully, Bishop is no stranger to being impaled by pipes. (Uncanny X-Men #348)
SabreRogue. (Uncanny X-Men #348)
This is pretty unambiguous, right? (Uncanny X-Men #348)
Chris Bachalo’s back! (Uncanny X-Men #349)
Beast, Beast, Beast of the Jungle, strong as he can be! (Uncanny X-Men #349)
Whoa, that volcano base got a lot more complicated when we switched artists. (Uncanny X-Men #349)
Even Maggott’s hair gets more impressive when he goes into battle-mode! (Uncanny X-Men #349)
Bachalo draws chaos well. (Uncanny X-Men #349)
“Excess”? What do you mean by that word? (Uncanny X-Men #349)
All together now: “DAMMIT REMY!” (Uncanny X-Men #349)
NEXT EPISODE: X-Force hits the road!

398 – Shanna the Wee Devil

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
In which the rest of the X-Men return from space; Maggott is the new cool; Gambit’s past catches up with him; Chris Bachalo takes over as regular artist on Uncanny X-Men; Deathbird flirts singularly aggressively; Eany and Meany eat a truck; dating a telepathic ninja is going to take some getting used to; and Havok predictably remains ABD.
X-PLAINED
  • Motormouth (Harley Davis)
  • Motormouth and Killpower
  • Uncanny X-Men #347-349
  • Grovel and Spat
  • A horse guy who is actually a cat-frog-lizard guy
  • An extraordinarily half-assed action figure
  • Load-bearing backstory
  • Landscape
  • The other Nanny
  • Elegant foreshadowing
  • Beast’s appearance as a mutant power
  • Gambit’s chest hair
  • The end of playtime
  • CCA-compliant foliage
  • Deathbird and Bishop
  • A vanity plate
  • Eany and Meany
  • One-off psychometry
  • Psylocke vs. Maggott
  • Decompression
  • Havok’s enduring lack of a Ph.D.
NEXT EPISODE: X-Force hits the road!
NOTE: In this episode, Miles theorized Grovel’s voice as sounding halfway between Cable and Kermit the Frog without realizing that he was in fact just describing Sweetums. -Jay

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!