In which sky pirates are the best pirates; Wolverine eats chicken in the woods; Xavier’s area loses its status as our least favorite panel; Cable is suspiciously credulous; we search in vain for a consistent metaphor; Storm has a thing or two to learn about restorative justice; and this entire miniseries should probably just have been an annual.
Storm’s pirate adventures
The Morlocks (more) (again)
Several memes of yesteryear
The new Worst Panel
Several variations on the Ceremony of Light
How not to identify a body
The Hill (Limbo)
The inconsistent portrayals of Mikhail Rasputin
Still more members of Gene Nation
A new costume
The most obscure stories we’ve covered
That time Wolverine at his own arm
NEXT EPISODE: Jay’s favorite issue of X-Factor (and some others)!
Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!
In which the Hand probably doesn’t even offer dental; literally everyone is less creepy than the Joker and Harley Quinn; toxic masculinity is Sabretooth’s adamantium; Mark Trail is a wild ride; Wolverine trashes the dress code and gets funky; Larry Hama is your god now; and Sabretooth: Death Hunt scores a solid six on the butt-kick scale.
Mark Trail vs. X-Men
Sabretooth (Victor Creed)
Clones of Sabretooth
Sabretooth: Death Hunt #1-4
Ps[i don’t remember; that one guy]
A somewhat tasteful omission, I guess
The glow (and its counterintuitive sound effect)
Tribune (Graydon Creed)
Affirmations with Sabretooth
The butt-kick scale
A tearaway tuxedo
Dubious grenade handling
Parenting with Mystique
One thing Wolverine knows
The CHK-LIT gun
A very qualified recommendation
Our preferred versions of Sabretooth’s origin
NEXT EPISODE: Siena Blaze and the Mystery of the Missing Leprechauns!
In which we discuss several Very Special Issues; the real cautionary tale is not to trust Hank McCoy; horses are vehicles of lies and heartbreak; the X-Men shill for a state fair; whatever you’re doing, Cyclops is here to stop you; smoking is a gateway to some really weird vices; and we want YOU to design the latest X-Men PSA!
The alternate-timeline terrible choices of Hank McCoy
Our wholly unfounded theories about Spongebob Squarepants
Be X-Tra Safe With Blockbuster KidPrint and the X-Men
Some Fundamental Problems With Superhero PSAs
A man who may or may not be D-Man
Why Cable should deliver more PSAs
Why D.A.R.E. doesn’t work
Varying coherent cautionary tales
The Uncanny X-Men at the State Fair of Texas
A tragic lack of carnies
Danny the centaur and his very intense feelings about horses
Several exciting attractions at the State Fair of Texas
Some of the lesser-known danger of smoking
Whether Danny Rand can turn into a centaur
Hanging out and other gateways to delinquency
The South Side Social Club
Etiquette of following teenagers around
A villainous plan so ineffective that it’s actually kind of sad
X-Men you should hire for your PSAs
Our thoughts on the Disney/Fox merger
Where to find Bloodstorm
NEXT EPISODE: Giant-Size Winter Special!
LISTENER CHALLENGE: Send your X-Men PSAs to [email protected] with the subject PSA by December 27!
You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog.
In which the plot thickens; Jay and Miles fix Avatar; Ship is a good bro; you are in space right now; the Beginagains go full This Island Earth; Cyclops weaponizes love; voting is really important; and you’re listening to ten straight hours of soft jazz and subversion on ZZ-105
The other Dazzler (Bertram Worthington)
Our newest t-shirt
A metaphor within a metaphor, in space
The first half of Judgment War (briefly) (again)
A prisoner exchange
Hairstyles of the possessed and famous
Proper use of Cable
A case for retcons
Iceman vs. Archangel
A feisty little fellow from the stars
The secret origin of Ship
The core of Iceman’s personality
Beast and the Rejects
Some terrible hats
An unfair fight
A nefarious plot
The power of love
Why we use the word “queer”
Several theoretical and unlikely crossovers
NEXT EPISODE: Live at Vegas Valley Comic Book Festival, with musical guest Scott Koblish!
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!