Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: professor x

As Mentioned in Episode 456 – Until/Unless

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Techno-organic cover #1! (Uncanny X-Men #371)
Cheer up, Chuck – it’s just naptime at your school! I guess they all forgot their red and blue mats. (Uncanny X-Men #371)
I’m not so sure about this plot development, but… she’s just so happy! (Uncanny X-Men #371)
Hey, don’t judge: you look way grosser under your outer layer. (Uncanny X-Men #371)
“Dis was not in Gambit’s horoscope!” (Uncanny X-Men #371)
The Phalanx Covenant by Doctor Seuss. (Uncanny X-Men #371)
Techno-organic cover #2! (X-Men #91)
Take that, Billy G! You know what you did. (X-Men #91)
I love these weird faces and terrifying bone-trees! (X-Men #91)
Oof, brutal. (But nice dress, Rogue!) (X-Men #91)
URRKK indeed! (X-Men #91)
And for one panel, we were joined by the spirit of Bill Sienkiewicz. (X-Men #91)
Techno-organic cover #3! Yep, that’s Colossus’s arm from the last cover – we didn’t realize they connected until our listener Alex pointed it out on the blog! (X-Men Annual 1999)
This montage is way more efficient at describing continuity than our podcast. (X-Men Annual 1999)
Colonel Nicholas J. Fury, leading with guns and crotch. (X-Men Annual 1999)
Red Skull loves the Power Glove. It’s so bad. (X-Men Annual 1999)
Miles learned about the field of neurosurgery’s Thumbtack Technique back in college. (X-Men Annual 1999)
Go, Gadget, Go! (X-Men Annual 1999)
Yes, we know Douglock’s robo-suspenders started out as a miscoloring of his New Mutants uniform, but… they kinda work? (X-Men Annual 1999)
None of these new series will make it past a year. (X-Men Annual 1999)
NEXT TIME: Cecilia’s back!

456 – Until/Unless

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In which there’s nothing inherently wrong with monster-of-the-week; Marrow’s makeover extends to her font; Red Skull gets a Power Glove; Marvel sets up a slate of spinoffs; and you should hire Matt Hunter to produce your podcast!

X-PLAINED:

  • What Danger’s been up to lately
  • Uncanny X-Men #371
  • X-Men #91
  • X-Men Annual 1999
  • Crossover cover design
  • Skrullverine
  • Machine Man
  • Dethlok vs. Dethklok
  • Jack Truman (Agent 18) (to some extent)
  • A nice dress
  • An awkward reunion
  • Gambit as a mentor
  • Billy G.
  • A daring but silly rescue
  • Several upcoming series
  • Marrow’s bone bikini and/or pubes
  • Whether Rogue can absorb animals

NEXT EPISODE: Cecilia Reyes returns from retirement!

Want to hire J&MXPtXM producer Matt Hunter to produce your podcast? Email him!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 455 – Space, Geeks, and Galactus

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Where the streets have no [right angles in their fr]ame (X-Men #89)
“Hey, this gravestone’s taken! Get your own!” (X-Men #89)
Perhaps our very favorite Spider-Man. (X-Men #89)
Still more competent than the Great Lakes Avengers. (X-Men #89)
Kitty meets “Kitty”. (X-Men #89)
PICTURED: the computer lab Jay and Miles worked in back in college. (X-Men #89)
You’re all dead! And wear red! And from your employers you have fled! (X-Men #89)
Just a hell of a nice cover. (Uncanny X-Men #370)
I mean, Fake-Vision’s not wrong. (Uncanny X-Men #370)
“Over”-acting? I don’t understand what that phrase means. (Uncanny X-Men #370)
“As you know, Skrull-Bob…” (Uncanny X-Men #370)
That is an exceptionally Muppet-y Skrull. (Uncanny X-Men #370)
Superbeings to the left of me, space pirates to the right… (Uncanny X-Men #370)
Skrull-ternative medicine. (Uncanny X-Men #370)
Hey, those Skrulls are Muppet-y too! (X-Men #90)
In which Alan Davis draws everybody. (X-Men #90)
Okay, so Professor X’s plan doesn’t work, but… hell of a speech, Chuck. (X-Men #90)
“I said just a little off the top!” (X-Men #90)
Welp, here we go. (X-Men #90)
Who designed this thing?! (X-Men #90)
Well damn. (X-Men #90)
“You come around here often, reflection?” (X-Men #90)
NEXT TIME: Douglock’s back!

455 – Space, Geeks, and Galactus

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In which Roadhouse is basically a Wolverine story; Spider-Man does crimes; space names are derivative; there are lots of good reasons to yell at Professor Xavier; the X-Men do Doctor Who; Galactus is not interested in your puny human feelings; Marrow gets a new look; the Skrulls need a crash course in UI; and we overthink bones.

X-PLAINED:

  • The time the Skrulls did “A Piece of the Action”
  • The trouble with benevolent dictatorships
  • X-Men #89-90
  • Uncanny X-Men #370
  • A New York City that is not in fact New York City
  • “Spider-Man”
  • A ruse
  • Faces
  • Skrull problems
  • Mar-Vell
  • Adam Warlock
  • Sass vs. joviality
  • Skrull Cop City
  • Disguises
  • Nova (Frankie Raye)
  • How Galactus eats planets
  • Condiments
  • Several melees
  • Bone pubes
  • Skrull UI
  • Whether Moopsy could drink Wolverine’s bones
  • X-Musicals

NEXT EPISODE: The return of Douglock!

The Roald Dahl short story whose title Jay couldn’t recall is “Beware of the Dog.”

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 451 – Meanwhile in Another Dimension

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Spoiler: No. (Uncanny X-Men #368)
I need a black-and-white numbered legend for this panel. (Uncanny X-Men #368)
HAMMER PANTS (Uncanny X-Men #368)
And now, for something completely different. (Uncanny X-Men #368)
Specifically, this. (Uncanny X-Men #368)
Well, then. (X-Men #88)
“Good lord!” (X-Men #88)
The Trion. (X-Men #88)
Alan Davis’s Black Tom Cassidy is a looker. (X-Men #88)
Coooooool (X-Men #88)
Storm and Ororo. (Uncanny X-Men #369)
Tentacles from the tentacle dimension. (Uncanny X-Men #369)
THEY WENT IN THROUGH THE FACE (Uncanny X-Men #369)
The Trion, revisited. (Uncanny X-Men #369)
I fuckin’ love it when anyone carries Wolverine like this. (Uncanny X-Men #369)
Juggernaut vs. Jugger-not. (Uncanny X-Men #369)
Whoops. (Uncanny X-Men #369)
NEXT EPISODE: Magneto Rex!

 

451 – Meanwhile in Another Dimension

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In which we remain fascinated by Magneto’s robot butler; murder is Logan’s love language; the Juggernaut punches a hole in reality; Professor Xavier makes it weird; and Storm lectures several gods.

X-PLAINED:

  • Silly mutant powers
  • Uncanny X-Men #368-369
  • X-Men #88
  • Alan Davis’s X-Men run
  • Magneto’s robot butler
  • Joseph’s funeral
  • Nun-sense
  • A voyage to another dimension
  • Eyebrow power
  • Ejulp
  • The Trion
  • The other Gem of Cyttorak that’s like the first one but somehow worse
  • Several comas
  • Juggernaut vs. Juggernaut
  • Evil, kind of
  • Vacationing with X-Men characters
  • Illyana Rasputin and Rachel Summers

NEXT EPISODE: Magneto Rex

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 445 – Dick War

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This cover, man. (X-Men: The Magneto War #1)
Rogue’s dream bikini. (X-Men: The Magneto War #1)
His powers are just icky. (X-Men: The Magneto War #1)
Please enjoy Nightcrawler’s adorable pajamas. (X-Men: The Magneto War #1)
That’s… that’s not Trish Tilby. (Uncanny X-Men #366)
…what… (Uncanny X-Men #366)
Magneto knows from villainous lairs. (Uncanny X-Men #366)
Ferris is a cutie. (Uncanny X-Men #366)
NEXT EPISODE: Magneto wins.

LINKS & FURTHER ADVICE

 

445 – Dick War

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In which not every story needs to be an event; Alan Davis returns to the X-line; X-mansion security is not what it once was; Rogue needs some new fantasies; and Magneto wants a country.

X-PLAINED:

  • A poor governance decision
  • X-Men: The Magneto War #1
  • Uncanny X-Men #366
  • Astral demerits
  • A very dramatic dream
  • The yolk of oppression
  • Several Acolytes
  • Nightcrawler’s nightcap
  • Our standards for advertisers
  • Suburban Magneto
  • Ferris
  • Magnet problems
  • Forged DNA
  • Mutants from Georgia, Florida, and Indiana
  • Flying with Storm

NEXT EPISODE: Magneto wins.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

RSVP to our birthday shenanigans!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 440 – Fightin’ and Ballin’

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Fight fight fight, fight fight fight! (X-Men #83)
PHWOOOOOSH PKOOOM YAAIIIHEEE SWOOOOOOOOOSSS (X-Men #83)
‘Sup, demonic sperm? (X-Men #83)
From organic steel to organic… whatever that is. (X-Men #83)
What if Pinocchio but evil Colossus-bot? (X-Men #83)
The other Cerebr(o/ite) design. (X-Men #83)
Design by David Cronenberg? (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Fight fight fight, fight fight fight! (Again again again!) (Uncanny X-Men #364)
The best version of Post. (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Wolverine: vigilante relationship counselor and motivational speaker. (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Eeeuuuugghhh (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Charles Xavier: the world’s most ripped telepath. (X-Men #84)
Cerebro Prime has almost completed its Pokédex! (X-Men #84)
Colossus practices his witty banter. (X-Men #84)
Oil and razor blades and cotton candy and (X-Men #84)
The Xavier Protocols are gorier than expected. (X-Men #84)
Imagine all the people (X-Men #84)
Back home and back to the status quo. (X-Men #84)
NEXT TIME: Dracula.

Links and further reading:

440 – Fightin’ and Ballin’

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From organic steel to organic… whatever that is. (X-Men #83)

In which the Hunt for Xavier remains vaguely disappointing; Gambit is good with kids; nanomachines are the new unstable molecules; Marrow is a walking armory; and we recommend comics for babies.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Hunt for Xavier, Part 2
  • Babies and/or ghosts
  • Chekhov’s repowering
  • X-Men #83-84
  • Uncanny X-Men #364
  • Cerebro / Cerebro Prime
  • Cerebrite Alpha
  • Cerebrite Beta
  • X-Men serial numbers
  • What Gambit’s friends call him
  • How Miles stopped worrying and learned to love Gambit
  • Evil robot sperm
  • Mary Purcell
  • Multiple-monitor displays
  • A computer with a computer
  • AI
  • The Florida facility
  • Post
  • Pile-Driver X
  • A glimpse into the butt of all humanity
  • Comics for babies
  • Name-based powers

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X has Dracula problems!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!