What you see is pretty much what you get. (X-Force #1)
Welcome to X-Force! Hope you like leaping! (X-Force #1)
The most amazing thing about this page is the idea that an actual body is supposed to be in that armor. (X-Force #1)
Aw, that’s a noble sentiment! Hope you can keep it up! (X-Force #1)
Two whole pages later.(X-Force #1)
Is there an adult lubricant called Bodyslide? If not, there probably should be. (X-Force #1)
Boom Boom, never change. (X-Force #1)
Guys, that’s not how… ah, never mind. Have fun. (X-Force #1)
G.W. Bridge leverages S.H.I.E.L.D.’s significant spy network to keep a running tally of who has been naughty and who has been nice. (X-Force #1)
Lies? Continuity error? Retcons? WHO EVEN KNOWS ANYMORE? (X-Force #1)
THIS DELIGHTFUL SCAMP! (X-Force #1)
I spent hours combing through and comparing Shatterstar’s use of numbers in this arc. If you are expecting a useful revelation to follow that, you’re out of luck. (X-Force #2)
“No, two BLADES, not two… oh, never mind.” (X-Force #2)
Not pictured: Probably a really enthusiastic hug where Juggernaut picked up Black Tom and spun him around a bunch. (X-Force #2)
Siryn’s costume is actually pretty rad. (X-Force #3)
This commute is the worst. (X-Force #3)
What. (X-Force #3)
Cable, what are you even wearing? (X-Force #3)
That word balloon, though. (Spider-Man #16)
LOOK AT THAT FACE IT IS SO EXCELLENT (Spider-Man #16)
Dispatches from a more innocent time. (Spider-Man #16)
Cannonball is the best, but the faces in this issue are generally just incredibly good. (Spider-Man #16)
Did Todd McFarlane ever draw Judge Dredd? God, I hope so. (Spider-Man #16)
I’m honestly not sure what graphic enucleation would have added to this page; but you do you, I guess? (Spider-Man #16)
PLEASE STOP TRYING TO MAKE “SHATTY” HAPPEN. Please. (X-Force #4)
Remember when they only killed in self-defense, LIKE TWO ISSUES AGO? (X-Force #4)
MAYBE BECAUSE OTHERWISE YOU DROP THEM DOWN ELEVATOR SHAFTS (X-Force #4)
Somewhere, there’s a universe where Mignola drew a bunch of X-Force, and the ’90s were a very different time. (X-Force #4)
NEXT EPISODE: The not even remotely triumphant return of Technet!
LINKS & FURTHER READING
The concerns expressed in Tom Lehrer’s “MLF Lullaby” don’t age wildly well, but it’s still a catchy song.
Mr. Burns, A Post-Electric Play is definitely a thing on Earth-4935, only instead of a Simpsons episode, it’s the Pizza Hut X-Men comic where Cyclops doesn’t think it’s cool to have an adventure in Cyberspace.
In which X-Force is the cotton candy of comics; Jay & Miles overanalyze; eye spots are not the new domino masks; Feral is all about some murder; Black Tom and Juggernaut remain a delightful criminal power couple; Siryn’s costume is on point; over the edge is where we live; Jay gets briefly and intensely into Todd McFarlane; nothing will convince us that Fabian Nicieza did not know exactly what he was doing; and Kelly Thompson is a national treasure.
X-PLAINED:
Rumekistan
X-Force #1-4
Spider-Man #16
Leaping, both literal and metaphorical
Cannonball
Boom Boom
Cable
Domino
Warpath
Feral
Shatterstar
Siryn (Theresa Cassidy) (again)
MLF
The second and third-best-selling issues of all time
The Profit$
A very violent catchphrase
Chalet Shwartzkopf
Power Poses™ with Gideon™
The All-New, All-Different Weapon X (Garrison Kane)
6-Pack
Good vs. Awesome
George Washington Bridge
A moment so dramatic that it produces a second Shatterstar in a single panel
Some sports stuff, kind of
Uncomfortable anachronism
The stylistic necessity of healing factors
Marvel Unlimited view options
Rogue and Gambit
NEXT EPISODE: The not remotely triumphant return of Technet!
Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
In which Abs-lantis will not be denied; “slightly traumatized” is basically the default state of Xavier’s original students; we pick up the slack for Nicieza; Banshee and Moira MacTaggert probably have an active and varied love life; Xavier miscounts the X-Men; we look back over the Claremont/Simonson era of the X-Universe; and Jay makes a case for the re-resurrection of Jean Grey.
X-PLAINED:
X-Men: Red
Namor’s beard
The conclusion of the Muir Island Saga
Uncanny X-Men #280
X-Factor #70.
Cool orange spacesuits that make you immune to telepathy
Off-brand Magneto hats
Literary terrors of our childhoods
Agents DeMarco & Heacock (R.I.P.)
Casual use of nuclear weaponry
The cavalry
The end of the Shadow King
The most dysfunctional timeline
Uncanny X-Men #200-278
The case for an eclectic X-Universe
X-Campus
Resurrections, and when they do and don’t work
NEXT EPISODE: Ed Piskor’s Grand Design
The visual companion to this episode will be up sometime before the end of 2017, by which point Jay’s lungs will hopefully be working again. Yay?
(Seriously, though, fuck this cold. Fuck this cold so much.)
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
In which you are probably more familiar with this show than Jay and Miles are; Paul Smith makes good art; the Shadow King is so extra that his narration has its own narration; Evil Sexy Moira is a fashion queen; there are absolutely no circumstances in which it is appropriate to use the phrase “fist-o-rama”; Legion gets possessed; and we know absolutely nothing about Pokémon.
X-PLAINED:
Universes where people are other people
What Miles thought of Thor: Ragnorok (spoiler-free)
The Muir Island Saga (Part 1)
Uncanny X-Men #278-279
X-Factor #69
Teflon continuity
Our (lack of) favorite episodes of Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men
The Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men wiki
An alternate timeline
Corpse telepathy
A diabolical plan, sort of
Topicality
Theft
Sci-Fi Warlord Moira MacTaggert
Improbable aerodynamics
The greatest thing
The death of Peter Nicholas
The uncanny genital valley
Interesting ways to expand Cyclops’s powers
X-Pokémon
NEXT EPISODE: The Muir Island Saga concludes!
ART CHALLENGE: Send us your horrifying X-Pokémon! (Note: We were not kidding when we said that we know absolutely nothing about Pokémon, which means that we will probably believe anything you tell us about canon. Have fun!)
You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog.
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
“We don’t need no conservation of mass!” (New Mutants Annual #7)
Harness and Piecemeal. It only gets creepier from here. (New Mutants Annual #7)
This is definitely the last thing you see before you die. (New Mutants Annual #7)
Spoiler: Nope. (New Mutants Annual #7)
99% sure these dudes do not actually know how to play chess. (New Mutants Annual #7)
How great would it have been if Cable had made a Gulliver’s Travels joke? So great. (New Mutants Annual #7)
“Attack them with all your sound effects!” (New Mutants Annual #7)
Spoiler: They do, and it’s not. (New Mutants Annual #7)
OH, THANK GOD. (New Warriors Annual #1)
Piecemeal’s shirt is a little on-the-nose. (New Warriors Annual #1)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdJg6Duzzf4 (New Warriors Annual #1)
Namorita is great. (New Warriors Annual #1)
Oh, dear me. (New Warriors Annual #1)
I really like all the character-intro pages in this crossover. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #15)
Mother of the year, y’all. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #15)
You’re never too evil or too sexy for some good, old-fashioned filicide! (Uncanny X-Men Annual #15)
You sure are, James. You sure are. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #15)
Inappropriate, Bobby. (X-Factor Annual #6)
None of my math textbooks were ever this psychedelic. (X-Factor Annual #6)
I briefly considered making this visual companion nothing but character-intro pages. (X-Factor Annual #6)
“Kings of Pain? Oh, yeah, isn’t that the crossover where Cyclops encourages a disturbed youth to commit suicide?” (X-Factor Annual #6)
(Nah, actually, he’s comparatively ethical about it; especially considering that the kid is technically already dead and has been for years.) (X-Factor Annual #6)
Okay, then. (X-Factor Annual #6)
NEXT EPISODE: Summers family bullshit on the moon!
In which we finally announce our NYCC panel lineup; Boom Boom is the Gina Linetti of X-Force; we don’t actually know very much about the New Warriors; Cable grows as a person; Cyclops makes an ethically dubious call; Warren Kenneth Worthington III is a jerk; Jay gets very angry at a fictional character; no one gets a happy ending and the skeleton was inside you all along.
Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!
We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)
“Also, you know that dream about the–” “DUDE, ENOUGH.” (Fallen Angels #6)
Welcome to Coconut Grove! Hope you survive the… y’know. (Fallen Angels #6)
Somewhere there’s an alternate universe that’s just like 616 except that Bobby and Warlock wore these costumes for the rest of New Mutants. (Fallen Angels #7)
Aw, Boom Boom. =( (Fallen Angels #7)
DAMNIT, ARIEL, THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS. (Fallen Angels #7)
That time Warlock learned to love between two issues of a miniseries. (Fallen Angels #8)
In which we relax our definition of X-book; we really want Sunspot to grow a mustache; Miles gets an excuse to say “shillelagh”; Bill the Lobster goes on a rampage; and Fallen Angels is really, really, really wonderful.
X-Plained:
Devil Dinosaur
Moon Boy
Fallen Angels #1-8
Jo Duffy
Assembling a team
Sunspot as a point-of-view character
Compassion as a superpower
Da Costa’s Devils vs. Ma Guthrie’s Gorillas
Goat Simulator
An unfortunate incident
Somewhat harsh student evaluations
The moral compass of Magnum, P.I.
Warlock and Sunspot as mutual foils
Chance
Ariel
Multiple Man (Jamie Madrox) and several notable duplicates
Siryn (Theresa Cassidy)
Gomi
Bill
Don
The Fallen Angels
The Vanisher
The Marvel Girl Fan Club
Lobster feelings
Kirby monsters
Doris Danger
Dinosaur World
Fallen Angels as a spiritual antecedent to Runaways
The tragic death of Don the Lobster
Fallen Angels II
How to party like Dr. Doom
Doom Patrol vs. X-Men
NEXT WEEK: A Sinister debut.
You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog! (Thanks for your patience!)
Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!