Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: Uncanny X-Men

282 – The Tide Takes the Castle

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which the Xavier Institute for Higher Learning should really be the setting of a stoner comedy; Garrabed Bashur’s brain is probably 90% porn by now; the tide always takes the castle; William Drake remains terrible; Adam X the X-Treme deserved better; Jay pitches a series; disability is not a boolean and exclusively medically-defined state; and we are all about some weird X-Men tie-in products.

X-PLAINED:

  • Mariko Yoshida in the afterlife
  • Moon Talk
  • Some upcoming X-books
  • X-Men #38-39
  • Uncanny X-Men #319
  • Many unhealthy coping mechanisms
  • Sinister foreshadowing
  • Fancy hair
  • Commcast (Garabed Bashur)
  • Hawk sex
  • An exceptionally resonant callback
  • Intersectional bigotry
  • The domestic dynamics of the Drake household
  • The remarkably poignant return of Adam X the X-Treme
  • The opposite of a Jack London story
  • An unlikely intergenerational frienship
  • A novel use of a novel superpower
  • Mutation as and intersecting with disability
  • X-Men tie-in products we’d like to see

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor fills in!

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As Mentioned in Episode 275 – End of the Summer

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
HI, PROSH. (X-Force #39)
Look at this charming weirdo. (X-Force #39)
You see what I mean about the frolicking? (X-Force #39)
Damn skippy! (X-Force #39)
Well, that can’t be good. (X-Force #39)
I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING (X-Force #39)
This whole issue has a very Looney Toons vibe. (X-Factor #107)
It’s good that they can find common ground. (X-Factor #107)
Gravity: she’s a harsh mistress. (X-Factor #107)
Again: I really love the way the art here leans into Strong Guy’s inherent cartoonishness. (X-Factor #107)
Ouch. (X-Factor #107)
That cover! (Uncanny X-Men #318)
The choker really does seem to have an extra layer of symbolism, especially considering the color vs. the rest of her outfit. (Uncanny X-Men #318)
You tried, buddy. (Uncanny X-Men #318)
Serious X-Terminators vibes, right? (Uncanny X-Men #318)
“But, y’know, good luck with that.” (Uncanny X-Men #318)
She’s not wrong, Warren. (Uncanny X-Men #318)
…it works, though. (Uncanny X-Men #318)
NEXT EPISODE: The Soul Sword Trilogy!

LINKS & FURTHER CRYPTIDS:

275 – End of the Summer

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Professor is too cool for the Phalanx; fatphobia is significantly more dangerous than Fred Dukes; Strong Guy catches a plane; Emma Frost will not let you coast; Jubilee says goodbye to the X-Men; and it’s probably for the best that we have avoided corporate advertisers.

X-PLAINED:

  • Mr. M
  • Thor: Metal Gods
  • Ship (more) (again)
  • The Phalanx vs. the Borg
  • Several cover homages
  • X-Force #39
  • X-Factor #107
  • Uncanny X-Men #318
  • Prosh
  • The myriad delights of embodiment
  • A complex theory about Leprechauns
  • Benefits of single-issue stories
  • Strong Guy vs. the Blob
  • Strong Guy vs. Gravity
  • Strong Guy vs. an airplane
  • Strong Guy vs. biology
  • Several explosions
  • The kids of Generation X
  • Deluxe-format comics
  • The Xavier Institute for Higher Learning
  • Goodbyes
  • Dazzler’s relative immortality
  • Jay’s X-Men Happy Meal Toy wish list
  • How to make a page-accurate Warlock toy

NEXT EPISODE: The Soul Sword Trilogy

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 271 – Abs for Days

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
And we open our cover spotlight series with Monet, who is, for some reason, tiptoeing in big clunky boots. (Uncanny X-Men #316)
A name AND implied backstory? Yeah, she’s doomed. (Uncanny X-Men #316)
Okay, yeah, Kubert’s Banshee can get it. (Uncanny X-Men #316)
This is actually a great look. Too bad it’s a Phalanx doppelgänger. (Uncanny X-Men #316)
There they are, folks: Banshee’s abs. (Uncanny X-Men #316)
Next up: Synch! (X-Men #36)
He just looks so wrong with the intact glasses! (X-Men #36)
Showing a bunch of predominantly white cops holding guns on an unarmed black teenager while claiming that superpowers are the only issue in play is a pretty good illustration of exactly how the mutant metaphor fails at intersectionality. (X-Men #36)
Oh, hey, the Phalanx got legit scary! (X-Men #36)
[whispered] but why does the phalanx need abs (X-Men #36)
Heck, yeah, dynamic covers! (Uncanny X-Men #317)
The gang’s (almost) all here! (Uncanny X-Men #317)
Seriously, he might as well just wear a t-shirt that says “I’m a supervillain pretending to be a teenager.” (Uncanny X-Men #317)
nope (Uncanny X-Men #317)
For those of you wondering: Yes, they will eventually hook up. (Uncanny X-Men #317)
What I’m mostly getting from this is that the Phalanx offers great dental. (Uncanny X-Men #317)
Chekhov’s teleportation accident. (Uncanny X-Men #317)
Monet is actually both of her younger sisters right now, but try not to think too much about it. (Uncanny X-Men #317)
I liked the last one better. (X-Men #37)
Definitely the French lessons. (X-Men #37)
Husk’s powers are so gross and awesome! (X-Men #37)
Such a cool use of layout. (X-Men #37)
Aw, man. (X-Men #37)
NEXT EPISODE: No puppy for Forge.

LINKS & FURTHER TRAVELS:

  • If you like picture books, it’s worth taking some time to check out the work of Peter Sís.

271 – Abs for Days (The Phalanx Covenant, Part 1 of 3)

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we’re finally both back in the virtual studio; Generation X is the new Inferno; the Phalanx Covenant begins; we’re not talking about Hickman in our coverage of this story; Banshee is the adult in the room; the Phalanx is pretty sexist; and gross powers are cool.

X-PLAINED:

  • Blink
  • Peter Sís
  • The Phalanx Covenant
  • “Generation Next” (but not Generation Next)
  • Uncanny X-Men #316-317
  • X-Men #36-37
  • Yet another way to do a crossover event
  • Some very good visual branding
  • What we’re not covering
  • Sexy Banshee
  • Retired Colonel Gayle Cordbecker
  • Monet St. Croix (kind of)
  • Coaxing
  • Early days of the Internets
  • Everett Thomas (Synch)
  • The fate of Sara Grey
  • Phalanx Phashion
  • Angelo Espinosa (Skin)
  • Clarice Ferguson (Blink)
  • Some guy allegedly named Gregor
  • Harvest
  • A very expensive house
  • An apparent death

NEXT EPISODE: Forge does not get a puppy.

NOTE: Jay was right: LiveJournal first launched in 1999.

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 267 – The Saddest Joyride

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
One of those images that has really, really stuck with us over the years. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
It took a lot of self restraint not to post every single drawing of Emma in Bobby’s body from this issue. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
Those Sienkiewicz inks! (Uncanny X-Men #314)
DAMN, Emma. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
You can almost see Generation X forming between the panels. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
Programming a hologram of his dead sister to harangue him in the Danger Room may be the most Bishop move yet. (Uncanny X-Men #314)
He sewed that cape out of SO MANY cheap vinyl Catwoman costumes. (X-Men Annual #18)
Never take teenagers hostage; they’ll just judge you ’til you let them go out of sheer insecurity. (X-Men Annual #18)
[Insert Jude the Obscure joke here.] (X-Men Annual #18)
Don’t fuck with Jean Grey. (X-Men Annual #18)
WHY IS THERE A GIANT SQUID HERE (X-Men Annual #18)
Aw, Bishop. (X-Men Annual #18)
For more of this beautiful friendship, we’d recommend giving canon a miss and going straight to fellow X-Podling Adam Reck’s delightful Bish & Jubes–and, while you’re at it, supporting the collected edition on Kickstarter!
On Fridays, we wear fuchsia. (Uncanny X-Men #315)
That is one sweet coma beard. (Uncanny X-Men #315)
Yes, this is a good speech; but also, I just realized that given that the whole trial happens in space, it definitely falls under maritime law, AND I FORGOT TO MAKE ANY JOKES ABOUT IT IN THE EPISODE. (Uncanny X-Men #315)
NEXT EPISODE: We’re so close to nearly reaching what’s almost the Phalanx Covenant!

LINKS & FURTHER ACTION POINTS

267 – The Saddest Joyride

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Emma Frost is a better Iceman than Bobby Drake; Generation X is aggressively foreshadowed; Malcolm and Randall are the Rosencrantz and Guildenstern to Bishop’s Hamlet; and we launch a campaign for our own Multiversal designation.

X-PLAINED:

  • The first time the X-Men met Emma Frost
  • Uncanny X-Men 314-315
  • X-Men Annual #18
  • A game show nobody should ever under any circumstances actually make
  • Emma Frost’s recruitment tactics
  • Previously unexplored ice powers
  • The direct prelude to Generation X
  • Caliban (more) (again)
  • SoftPaws(TM)
  • The giant squids of New York
  • The neophyte
  • A trial, kind of
  • X-Men power fantasies
  • Earth-X-Plain

NEXT EPISODE: We’re so close to nearly reaching what’s almost the Phalanx Covenant!

Game show music by MusicManiac301; used with permission.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 253 – Autumn in the Uncanny Valley

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Aw, these kids. (Uncanny X-Men #208)
THEY’RE SO BAD AT BEING PEOPLE AND I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. (Uncanny X-Men #208)
I also love them. (Uncanny X-Men #208)
Really, this is one of those issues that just makes me want the X-Men to always be happy and never have to do any superhero stuff. (Uncanny X-Men #208)
Fucking hawks, always poaching passes on the gridiron. (Uncanny X-Men #208)
Jean “Grab fate by the throat and hold on until it stops moving” Grey. (Uncanny X-Men #208)
What do YOU think Jean is saying here? Fill in her word balloon for a chance to, I dunno, I guess we could publish a gallery of them? (Uncanny X-Men #208)
The second scariest face in this issue. (Uncanny X-Men #208)
NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE (Uncanny X-Men #208)
Excellent use of ironic juxtaposition, there. (Uncanny X-Men #208)
It’s very text-heavy in Charles Xavier’s brain. (Uncanny X-Men #209)
“Now, let’s talk about my silvery mane.” (Uncanny X-Men #209)
I bet he wouldn’t be so depressed if he knew how good his depression beard looked! (Uncanny X-Men #209)
WHY DOES NOBODY IN THIS UNIVERSE HAVE APPROPRIATE PROFESSIONAL BOUNDARIES?! (Uncanny X-Men #209)
Version 1. (Uncanny X-Men #209)
Version 2. (Uncanny X-Men #209)
Ah, there it is. (Uncanny X-Men #209)
“Funny, I don’t remember that day being quite so caption-heavy.” (Uncanny X-Men #210)
“Later, we’re all going to go break into the zoo and flash the zebras. Trust us. It’s TRADITION.” (Uncanny X-Men #210)
Not a lot, Carl. Not a lot. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
“Look, Nathan, this is basically how we bond in my family.” (Uncanny X-Men #210)
He just hangs out in that position. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
“Let’s see. I went after a man in hospice care and got my ass kicked. What’s even lower-hanging fruit?” (Uncanny X-Men #210)
I can’t stop imagining them having to bat those captions out of the way as they run forward. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
He looks so mad about it! (Uncanny X-Men #210)
NEXT EPISODE: Obviously.

LINKS & FURTHER HEADLINES

253 – Autumn in the Uncanny Valley

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which an engagement begins; Jean Grey’s Walden Puddle counterpart is definitely Nicole; Cyclops is the telepathic equivalent of a pit trap with spikes at the bottom; Charles Xavier’s subconscious is very dialogue-heavy; nobody ever has appropriate professional boundaries; Cable dabbles in passive aggression; and the best is yet to come.

X-PLAINED:

  • Some of Blaquesmith’s recent activities
  • Uncanny X-Men #308-310
  • A very sweet retcon
  • Thanksgiving “traditions”
  • How to scare crows
  • Emplates
  • Feelings and telepathy
  • A proposal
  • A misprint
  • Thanksgiving at the Xavier School
  • A somewhat alarming manifestation of a conscience
  • The lies Charles Xavier tells himself
  • Xavier’s depression beard
  • The evolution of Amelia Voght
  • Angry Claremontean Narrator: The Movie
  • The anticlimactic return of Carl “X-Cutioner” Denti
  • An unexpected resolution
  • Foreshadowing
  • Trans voices in the larger comics conversation

NEXT EPISODE: The wedding!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, or your favorite podcatcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

HAPPY PRIDE! This month, we’re donating all of the proceeds from our TeePublic shopto Trans Lifeline!

As Mentioned in Episode 250 – Minding the DNA, feat. Fabian Nicieza

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There’s no visual companion to this episode, but here’s some cool stuff we talked about!