warren worthington – Page 6 – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

218 – Careful What You Lick

October 15, 2018 Jay 28 comments

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which X-Cutioner’s Song may be over, but its repercussions continue; Uncanny X-Men hits a major milestone; superhero comics are and always have been political; Bishop learns to banter; the X-Men gain an unlikely ally; and Magneto remains exceptionally difficult to kill.

X-PLAINED:

Jay & Miles at VVCBF
Uncanny X-Men #298-300
The Acolytes (more) (again)
The Upstarts (more) (again)
Several important lessons
A very fancy room
A very fancy brain
The unpleasant fate of Sharon Friedlander
The all-new, all-different Acolytes
Carmella Unuscione
The return of one of our favorite antagonists
A sick burn
The fate of Asteroid M
Molting
A debate
Graydon Creed (more) (again)
The tentative redemption of Robert Kelly
How to lose a debate with Joe Biden
A large number of prescient political references
Friends of Humanity
How to engage with a fascist in a televised debate
Noah DuBois
Fatale
A generic rural mob
Milan
A narratively convenient superpower
Amelia Voght
Seamus Mellencamp
Neophyte
The gospel of Magneto
A joyous reunion
The helmet that wouldn’t die
Ponytail ethics
Timelust
Several accents
The current state of Rogue’s powers

NEXT EPISODE: All Emma All Episode (feat. Seanan McGuire, Leah Williams, and more)!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 214 – Stryfe’s Burn Book

September 16, 2018 Jay 7 comments

Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Look at this gorgeous monstrosity. (Stryfe’s Strike File)

This dude would not appear in the main Marvel Universe until about a decade after he was introduced here. (Stryfe’s Strike File)

FORESHADOWING! (Stryfe’s Strike File)

Mystique’s worst kid, by a fairly wide margin. (Stryfe’s Strike File)

Remember her; she’ll be a big deal later. (Stryfe’s Strike File)

Stryfe: The Worst Kid in Your Fandom. (Stryfe’s Strike File)

SPOILER: This cover is profoundly misleading. (Uncanny X-Men #297)

WARREN KENNETH WORTHINGTON III, YOU DID WHAT?! (Uncanny X-Men #297)

A rare moment of candor from Professor X. (Uncanny X-Men #297)

The only part of this issue that I REALLY have trouble believing is that Jubilee was carying around a second pair of ‘blades just for funsies. Those things are cumbersome as heck. (Uncanny X-Men #297)

DAMNIT, JUBILEE. THIS IS WHY NOBODY TRUSTS YOU. (Uncanny X-Men #297)

Aw. (Uncanny X-Men #297)

And Aw, again. (Uncanny X-Men #297)

Yet a third Aw. (Uncanny X-Men #297)

She’s beauty, she’s grace, she’ll explode your face. (X-Force #19)

Bobby has had a pretty rough year. (X-Force #19)

Slow clap. (X-Force #19)

Vanessa is not having a great time post-X-Force. (X-Force #19)

PHOENIX II DECOLLETAGE! (X-Force #19)

Those are actually… really snazzy team uniforms. Dang. (X-Force #19)

And that was the end of THAT particular metaphor. (X-Force #19)

NEXT EPISODE: Rich people are different from us.

LINKS & FURTHER CONVERSATIONS:

Check out the first Very Official Episode Transcript, over on the J&M wiki!
(Did you know we have a wiki? We have a wiki!)
If you want to get involved in the transcripts–or just hang out with rad folks–come join us on Discord! (Transcription organization happens in the Greymalkin channel.)
You can hear the WHAT?! supercut in Episode 52!

214 – Stryfe’s Burn Book

September 16, 2018 Jay 10 comments

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In which “wolves” proves a remarkably broad category in the 616; we at least nominally wrap up X-Cutioner’s Song; Stryfe could really use a style guide; we issue our first-ever music challenge; Jubilee is an agent of chaos; Gambit’s powers are a metaphor; Charles Xavier has a complicated relationship to disability; the quality of Jay’s penmanship is a matter of official record; Boom Boom is a remarkably good costume designer; Cannonball comes into his own as a leader; and every “WHAT?!” you hear on this show is fresh and original.

X-PLAINED:

Wolves, to a very limited extent
Jay & Miles (kinda) at NYCC
Transcripts
X-Cutioner’s Song
Stryfe’s Strike File
Uncanny X-Men #297
X-Force #19
A gentle bird caught in a swirling tornado of lust and desperation
Shades of me
Shades of you
Shades of them
Our first-ever music challenge
Some foreshadowing
Nostalgia
A very nice hug
The one good side effect of Stryfe’s technoorganic virus
Charles Xavier vs. disability politics
Several practical jokes in very poor taste
Teacher-student bonding
An excellent epithet
Some lettering choices
An extended Hail Caesar riff
The Clooney Scale
An enduring mystery
Clone powers
Exclamatory logistics

NEXT EPISODE: Hey, remember Excalibur?

MUSIC CHALLENGE: Write and record a song based on or using text from Stryfe’s Strike File (or any of his rants from X-Cutioner’s Song)! Send your masterpieces (or links to ’em) to xplainthexmen(at)gmail(dot)com, with the subject STRYFE SONG!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 200 – Lightning in a Bottle, with Louise Simonson

June 3, 2018 Jay 3 comments

Listen to the episode here.

LINKS & FURTHER LISTENING:

For the beginning of Louise Simonson’s X-Factor run, check out Episode 64 – Ski Lodge of Apocalypse.
We started covering Simonson’s New Mutants run in Episode 82 – Birds and Boys.
Hear about the aftermath of Doug Ramsey’s death in Episode 91 – The Saddest Story Ever Told.
For a close look at Havok & Wolverine: Meltdown, click over to Episode 114 – Meltdown.
You can learn more about the Judgment War arc in Episode 128 – A Stupid Way to Die, and Episode 133 – Feisty Little Fellow from the Stars.
Louise previously appeared on the show–along with Chris Claremont–in Episode 168 – Live at NYCC.
(We interviewed Chris at more length in Episode 100 – Unexpected Wonder.)
And we talked a lot about the mutant metaphor and current politics in Episode 164 – This Is the Mutant Revolution: Live at Rose City Comic Con.
The new Power Pack podcast we mentioned this episode is Unpacking the Power Pack. Go give ’em a listen!

200 – Lightning in a Bottle, with Louise Simonson

June 3, 2018 Jay 29 comments

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In which we celebrate a major milestone with the coolest person ever to work on the X-books and look back at the last four-plus years of the podcast; and nobody ends up on trial at the Hague.

NEXT WEEK: Jay & Miles take a much-needed vacation.

NEXT EPISODE: The X-Men take the fight to Mojoworld!

Check out our blog for links to the stuff we discussed in this episode!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 198 – How to Destroy the Universe Without Really Trying

May 20, 2018 Jay 2 comments

Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Alas, the Walter Simonson cover is a false alarm. (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

Sweet threads, Brigadier! (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

Life Model Decoy life is hard. (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

At this point, she should really just change her code name to “Ripley.” (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

Thiiiiiiiiis guy. (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

“Maybe, like, a buck fifty?” (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

And that’s why we don’t experiment on ourselves, Dr. Cayre. (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

Air-Walker is a cyborg who loves his work. (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

And now, a whole bunch of Lockheed making really good shifty faces! (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

Seriously, it’s basically just this for like six images. (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

What, you thought I was joking? (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

I was not joking. (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

(Okay, fine, I also threw in a Captain Britain suit on fire.) (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

But here’s one more Lockheed, for good measure! (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

“Remember when I basically destroyed the universe? Good times!” (Excalibur: Air Apparent)

Well, it’s no Excalibur #41 or 52, but I guess it’ll do. (Excalibur: XX Crossing)

He’s got style, I’ll give him that. (Excalibur: XX Crossing)

Doom is a tough audience. (Excalibur: XX Crossing)

Scott Summers: hopelessly uncool in just about any time period. (Excalibur: XX Crossing)

World War II Angel may in fact be the best Angel. Dang! (Excalibur: XX Crossing)

But what could it be?! (Excalibur: XX Crossing)

IT’S A HONKER OF DOOM! (Excalibur: XX Crossing)

Sure, why not? (Excalibur: XX Crossing)

This is one of those costumes that really only works in specific art styles; but this is one of them. (Excalibur: XX Crossing)

I mean, he is kind of a notorious dick… (Excalibur: XX Crossing)

He died as he lived: crushed under a tower of word balloons. (Excalibur: XX Crossing)

That Kitty and Bobby briefly dated later makes this much funnier. (Excalibur: XX Crossing)

NEXT EPISODE: Shattershot!

LINKS & FURTHER READING:

How to Snakes is one of the best things on YouTube. Watch, listen, and learn.
Our RoboCop Remake is amazing and ABSOLUTELY NOT SAFE FOR WORK. You’ve been warned.
This Monty Python sketch may clarify a few of Jay’s more bizarre moments in this episode.
To learn all about Honkers, listen to Episode 197 – Wolverine and the Honker of Doom.

198 – How to Destroy the Universe Without Really Trying

May 20, 2018 Jay 41 comments

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In which Excalibur goes 16-bit platformer; Alysande gets new threads; Shadowcat should probably just change her code name to Ripley; Captain Britain may or may not destroy the universe; Doctor Doom tries his hand at human resources; Excalibur is at home with weirdness; and no lizard needs breasts.

X-PLAINED:

Invisible Boy
Human heralds of Galactus
Excalibur Special Editions
Excalibur: Air Apparent
Excalibur: XX Crossing
Dr. Jonothon Cayre
Norm the LMD
Lava pits of Scotland
Some dubious herpetology
Eric the Cyborg (Coldblood-7)
Robert Cop
Special Man
Air-Walker and/or Gabriel Lam
A cosmic explosion
Captain Britain’s extra costume
Sidestep
An exceptionally awkward job interview
A counterintuitive plan
The other time-displaced X-Men
The best version of Angel
Angel’s third-greatest nemesis
Gladiator Hank
A very fancy vest
The best Excalibur Special Edition
The Phalanx vs. the Technarchy
Warlock vs. gender
Our thoughts on Avengers: Infinity War

Note: according to the letter column from Excalibur #54, at least some of the art credits for Excalibur: XX Crossing were incorrect, so some of our descriptions of who drew what in this episode are wrong. See the comments below for more information!

NEXT EPISODE: Shattershot!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 193 – Sewers of Tomorrow

April 15, 2018 Jay 8 comments

Listen to the podcast here!

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

On one hand: These dudes are pretty rad. On the other hand: being able to detect normal humans is a pretty ridiculous mutant power. (Uncanny X-Men #277)

John Romita, Jr. can be hit-or-miss, but he definitely draws some rad miscreants of the future. (Uncanny X-Men #277)

WOMP. (Uncanny X-Men #277)

Compulsory Fitzroy Hair Appreciation Moment(TM). (Uncanny X-Men #277)

The Witness, in all his really creepy glory. (Uncanny X-Men #277)

Can you imagine trying to have a conversation with this dude? (Uncanny X-Men #277)

I don’t understand what’s happening with Cyclops’s torso; and, frankly, I don’t want to. (Uncanny X-Men #278)

“Look! A distraction!” (Uncanny X-Men #278)

The first appearance of the letter… (Uncanny X-Men #278)

…and the second, FROM THE SAME FLIPPIN’ PAGE. (Uncanny X-Men #278)

Thaaaaat’s our Archangel! (Uncanny X-Men #278)

Can confirm. -Jay (Uncanny X-Men #278)

*Today, at least. (Uncanny X-Men #278)

Long Island cops are clearly unfamiliar with Cyburai. (Uncanny X-Men #279)

Mystique is exceptionally bad at helping. (Uncanny X-Men #279)

Damnit, Forge. (Uncanny X-Men #279)

Storm’s reaction is appropriate. (Uncanny X-Men #279)

Bobby. Have you MET your parents? (Uncanny X-Men #279)

Best. Date. Ever. (Uncanny X-Men #279)

Remember that time Mikhail Rasputin turned a random skater into a tree? Because that certainly happened. (Uncanny X-Men #280)

Hanging out naked in the rain? This dude is DEFINITELY learning the ropes from Storm. (Uncanny X-Men #280)

DAMNIT, Forge. (Uncanny X-Men #280)

NEXT EPISODE: Brood trouble in the Big Easy!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

Learn all about the Cyburai in Episode 160 – Hank McCoy and the Hickey of Destiny!
Laura Dern is precious and must be protected at all costs.

193 – Sewers of Tomorrow

April 15, 2018 Jay 28 comments

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In which we pour one out for Malcolm and Randall; Cyclops is the worst at fun; Storm is better than you and always will be; Bishop forgets his first name; the X-Men can’t tie bow ties; Iceman’s dad is spectacularly awful; Mikhail Rasputin may have some lingering issues; and Doug Ramsey would probably have been pretty entertained by Hackers if he had survived long enough to see it.

X-PLAINED:

Whether Professor Xavier is dead
Marvel time vs. podcast time
Uncanny X-Men #287-290
The Wit and Wisdom of Henry McCoy
A dance of death and destruction
Styglut
Future flashbacks
Sewers of tomorrow
The Witness
“Fun”
Blood math
A mysterious letter
A terrible date
Several capes
The return of the cyburai
A theoretical Hackers crossover

NEXT EPISODE: Brood trouble in the Big Easy!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 186 – Right in the Melee

February 25, 2018 Jay One comment

Listen to the podcast here!

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Sunfire’s new costume. (Uncanny X-Men #284)

Spoiler: Nah. (Uncanny X-Men #284)

The shiniest Predators. (Uncanny X-Men #284)

This is gonna seem more ironic in a few pages. (Uncanny X-Men #284)

That’s our Sunfire! (Uncanny X-Men #284)

Yep. The folks in the Predator masks look… exactly like humans. (Uncanny X-Men #284)

Spoiler: The cake is a lie. (Uncanny X-Men #285)

Interdimensional travel faces. (Uncanny X-Men #285)

A very expository landing. (Uncanny X-Men #285)

I would make a “No groveling! This is a proper Soviet household!” joke, but I feel like The Twelve Chairs might be an excessively deep cut even by my standards. (Uncanny X-Men #285)