Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: Artie Maddicks

As Mentioned in Episode 375 – One Thousand Kicks to the Face

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So many textures! (X-Men #60)
Ororo, you’re a good enough thief that you could probably afford clothes without holes in them… or is that a style thing? (X-Men #60)
I mean, this is definitely implying that Storm ran around the bronze age with Candra’s Heart as a fashion accessory, right? (X-Men #60)
“Dammit Ororo, did you learn nothing from my brother?!” (X-Men #60)
Candra as shibari lobster once more, now with ear-mandibles! (X-Men #60)
Remember that one Punisher movie where Frank set a bunch of cars on fire in the shape of a big skull? That was kinda cool. (X-Men #60)
Tiny mustache or shadow – you be the judge! (X-Men #60)
I know the Shadow King is supposed to be dead at this point, but that has to be him! Look at the speech bubble borders! (X-Men #60)
Suddenly, ninjas. (X-Men #61)
Ooh, nice visual flow. (X-Men #61)
“As opposed to that time I had kidney stones, which was only about three hundred kicks to the face!” (X-Men #61)
Logan is tasting the air like a snake! (X-Men #61)
Storm gets Candra’s hopes up… (X-Men #61)
…before Cyclops ZARKs them upon the rocks. That’s cold, guys. (X-Men #61)
Is it, though? (X-Men Unlimited #14)
Matching nightshirts! (X-Men Unlimited #14)
Whoa. Nicely done, Jim Cheung. (X-Men Unlimited #14)
Idyllic! (X-Men Unlimited #14)
Never change, Artie. (X-Men Unlimited #14)
Ever see Children of the Corn, Joe? (X-Men Unlimited #14)
I wish everyone had a dad this supportive. (X-Men Unlimited #14)
No moppet should moppet alone! (X-Men Unlimited #14)
NEXT TIME: Back to Asgard!

 

375 – One Thousand Kicks to the Face

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In which there is definitely a wrong way to enjoy your comics; Storm could probably use a more secure storage system; the Externals need more camp; and Joseph makes some valid points.

X-PLAINED

  • What Storm’s up to
  • X-Men Unlimited #7 (again) (briefly)
  • X-Men #60-61
  • X-Men Unlimited #14
  • Karima
  • Jamil
  • Candra (again)
  • A surprising absence of Howard Mackie
  • Candra’s heart
  • Some excessively complex psychic powers
  • Phylacteries
  • The origin of Storm’s romance with T’Challa
  • Kicks to the face as a unit of pain
  • Undercloaks
  • The alternate universe where the McCoys live in Indiana
  • The moppet squad (again)
  • Dunfee, IN
  • Yet another angry mob
  • Multiverse-variable powers
  • Favorite X-relationships

Correction: The Brandalorian let us know that “Phylacteries (tefillin) are not Chasidic; they’re a ritual object mentioned by the Torah, used by Jews of all sorts.” Apologies for our error, and we appreciate the correction!

NEXT EPISODE: X-Force goes to Asgard!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 358 – Giant-Size Special #10

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
I’d have picked this off the rack for its title treatment alone. (Daydreamers #1)
Skrull or Green Goblin? You be the judge! (Daydreamers #1)
(No fingernails were used in the construction of this possibly-imaginary boat.) (Daydreamers #1)
Damnit. (Daydreamers #1)
The first sign (heh) of the direction this universe is headed… (Daydreamers #2)
A passel of unlicensed guest stars. (Daydreamers #2)
WHAT THE DUCK?! (Daydreamers #2)
Howard’s idyllic not-actually family. (Daydreamers #3)
It’s weird, right? (Daydreamers #3)
Ouch. (Daydreamers #3)
This whole sequence is both very creepy and very sad. (Daydreamers #3)
Franklin deals with grief. (Daydreamers #3)

LINKS & FURTHER DUCKERY

 

358 – Giant-Size Special #10

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Hub & Lisa X-Plain Howard the Duck; Jay & Miles X-Plain Daydreamers; and Jonathan Hickman X-Plains his tenure on the X-line!

X-PLAINED:

  • The many lives of Moira MacTaggert
  • Feral moppets
  • Man-Thing and several characters who closely resemble Man-Thing
  • Howard the Duck
  • At least one Nexus of All Reality
  • Duck sex
  • Daydreamers #1-3
  • Never-Never Narnozbia
  • Tana Nile
  • A shadowy hunter and his ship of empty souls
  • A reasonably good Dr. Seuss riff
  • Duckworld, or an appealing facsimile thereof
  • H.E.R.B.I.E.
  • Jonathan Hickman on X-Men
  • The 7th Annual Super Doctor Astronaut Peter Corbeau Awards for Excellence at X-Cellence

(Note: Our interview with Jonathan Hickman contains spoilers for September 2021’s Inferno #1!)

NEXT EPISODE: Excalibur!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 166 – Proteus Has Two Mommies

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
“We don’t need no conservation of mass!” (New Mutants Annual #7)
Harness and Piecemeal. It only gets creepier from here. (New Mutants Annual #7)
This is definitely the last thing you see before you die. (New Mutants Annual #7)
Spoiler: Nope. (New Mutants Annual #7)
99% sure these dudes do not actually know how to play chess. (New Mutants Annual #7)
How great would it have been if Cable had made a Gulliver’s Travels joke? So great. (New Mutants Annual #7)
“Attack them with all your sound effects!” (New Mutants Annual #7)
Spoiler: They do, and it’s not. (New Mutants Annual #7)
OH, THANK GOD. (New Warriors Annual #1)
Piecemeal’s shirt is a little on-the-nose. (New Warriors Annual #1)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdJg6Duzzf4 (New Warriors Annual #1)
Namorita is great. (New Warriors Annual #1)
Oh, dear me. (New Warriors Annual #1)
I really like all the character-intro pages in this crossover. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #15)
Mother of the year, y’all. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #15)
You’re never too evil or too sexy for some good, old-fashioned filicide! (Uncanny X-Men Annual #15)
You sure are, James. You sure are. (Uncanny X-Men Annual #15)
Inappropriate, Bobby. (X-Factor Annual #6)
None of my math textbooks were ever this psychedelic. (X-Factor Annual #6)
I briefly considered making this visual companion nothing but character-intro pages. (X-Factor Annual #6)
“Kings of Pain? Oh, yeah, isn’t that the crossover where Cyclops encourages a disturbed youth to commit suicide?” (X-Factor Annual #6)
(Nah, actually, he’s comparatively ethical about it; especially considering that the kid is technically already dead and has been for years.) (X-Factor Annual #6)
Okay, then. (X-Factor Annual #6)
NEXT EPISODE: Summers family bullshit on the moon!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

 

166 – Proteus Has Two Mommies

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we finally announce our NYCC panel lineup; Boom Boom is the Gina Linetti of X-Force; we don’t actually know very much about the New Warriors; Cable grows as a person; Cyclops makes an ethically dubious call; Warren Kenneth Worthington III is a jerk; Jay gets very angry at a fictional character; no one gets a happy ending and the skeleton was inside you all along.

X-PLAINED:

  • Penance (but not that Penance)
  • Our actual, for-real NYCC panel details
  • “Kings of Pain”
  • New Mutants Annual #7
  • New Warriors Annual #1
  • Uncanny X-Men Annual #15
  • X-Factor Annual #6
  • The Alliance of Evil
  • Harness
  • Piecemeal
  • Genetech
  • IDIC
  • Symbolic chess
  • The New Warriors
  • The Clean Plate Club from Hell
  • The Pec Twins
  • ReBoot
  • A really screwed up debate
  • Magneto vs. Human Nature
  • Privilege and Callouts

NEXT WEEK: Summers Family Bullshit on the Moon!

COME SEE US LIVE AT NEW YORK COMIC CON, WITH SPECIAL GUESTS CHRIS CLAREMONT AND LOUISE SIMONSON!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 106 – The X-Terminators

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Hi, Bill Gaines! (X-Terminators #1)
In which Bogdanove goes full Silver-Age romance-cover! (X-Terminators #1)
And so it was. (X-Terminators #1)
Wellp. (X-Terminators #1)
Can Bogdanove draw Boom Boom forever, please? (X-Terminators #1)
THIS KID IS AWESOME. (X-Terminators #1)
The cartoonishness of this series is really, really fun. (X-Terminators #1)
“Classic goblin behavior.” Did she learn about this in school? (X-Terminators #1)
JAIL BREAK TIME! (X-Terminators #1)
Boom Boom vs. vending machines. (X-Terminators #2)
I love the extent to which Hostess Fruit Pies became a running joke within actual Marvel comics. (X-Terminators #2)
So doomed. (X-Terminators #2)
This is probably a little too niche to describe as “every parent’s worst nightmare,” but I’m sure it hit home for someone. (X-Terminators #2)
#WINNING (X-Terminators #2)
Seriously, though–wouldn’t it be funnier if this were just a regular Viewmaster? (X-Terminators #2)
I can’t find the Ghostbusters production photo this is an homage to, but I swear it exists. (X-Terminators #3)
The living landscape of NYC quickly becomes legitimately terrifying, without ever quite losing its cartoonishness. (X-Terminators #3)
Incidental transitional panel, or hidden pitch for a whole new series? (X-Terminators #3)
Magic spells are ridiculous. (X-Terminators #3)
THOSE FACES. (X-Terminators #4)
You know that feeling when a crossover flies in from nowhere and whacks you in the back of the head? Yeah. (X-Terminators #4)
OKAY, THEN. (X-Terminators #4)
Wouldn’t that be multiplying it by 100? (X-Terminators #4)
Are… pigeons particularly notorious for meekly accepting destruction? Is that a thing? (X-Terminators #4)
And they all lived happily ever–HA, NO, JUST KIDDING. GO READ NEW MUTANTS. (X-Terminators #4)
NEXT WEEK: The fall of Magik.

LINKS & FURTHER LISTENING:

106 – The X-Terminators

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which Nextwave is both canon and not-canon; Inferno officially begins; X-Terminators is basically a cartoon; Bill Gaines cannot catch a break; Artie and Leach are superbabies; Takeshi Matsuya is fantastic; you should probably never take our advice about anything; Boom Boom is pretty good at superhero costume design; Walter Peck was right; Miles still won’t stop saying that one line about stealing a baby; N’astirh is no pigeon; and “No Mutant Is an Island” is a patently inaccurate statement.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Beyond Corporation
  • The Defilers
  • X-Terminators #1-4
  • The first 35 issues of X-Factor, briefly
  • Two teams with the same name
  • Fredric Wertham
  • Bill Gaines
  • Crotus
  • Babies
  • A boarding school that may or may not be Phillips Exeter Academy
  • Muffy
  • Saint Simon’s Academy
  • Wiz Kid (Takeshi Matsuya)
  • Nuprin
  • Medical advice from goblins
  • The Goblin Buster
  • Metareferential snack food
  • RadSport Sport Fashion Outfitters
  • An exceptionally specific Ghostbusters reference
  • Helen and Tim
  • Dubious spell semantics
  • How not to incorporate a crossover into a miniseries, and vice versa
  • “No Mutant Is an Island”
  • A brief history of Magneto’s helmet
  • Definitive Magnetos

NEXT WEEK: The fall of Magik.

Special thanks to multiversal metacontinuity wizard Al Ewing for the last-minute assist on the cold open!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes, Google Play, or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 102 – Baby Race 2000

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Okay, then. (X-Factor #32)
I wanna hang out there. (X-Factor #32)
Please note that Boom Boom pauses to put on sunglasses before doing cool cool stuff. Boom Boom knows what’s up. (X-Factor #32)
MVP. (X-Factor #32)
Well, that’s certainly one way to do that. (X-Factor #33)
In Boom Boom’s defense, shopping is terrible. (X-Factor #33)
Go set something on fire for justice, kiddo! (X-Factor #33)
BEAST! We missed you! (X-Factor #33)
Y’know, most people would just send a C&D. (X-Factor #33)
Kinda answered your own question, there, buddy. (X-Factor #34)
Nanny and the Orphan-Maker walk the line between sad and terrifying SO beautifully. (X-Factor #34)
N’astirh got no time for your rationalizations, Hodge. (X-Factor #34)
Later, he’s going to go home and listen to Stabbing Westward in the dark. (X-Factor #34)
Aw. (X-Factor #34)
It’s okay. He’ll be back. (X-Factor #34)
Yes, Warren, we get it. (X-Factor #34)
Welcome to the State Home for Gaslighting. Hope you survive the… (X-Factor #35)
Worst. Orphanage. Ever. (X-Factor #35)
GAH. There is literally nothing in this issue that is not wildly unsettling. (X-Factor #35)
The orphanage is a metaphor that is also a real fictional orphanage. (X-Factor #35)
‘Kay. (X-Factor #35)
Sometimes you gotta prioritize. (X-Factor #35)
NEXT WEEK: Excalibur goes ongoing!

102 – Baby Race 2000

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which Beast’s DNA is basically held together with spit and baling wire; Boom Boom wins MVP; Angel goes full goth; Cameron Hodge loses his head; Cyclops is basically a Silent Hill protagonist; and the Nebraska Department of Social Services is probably not adequately equipped to deal with Mister Sinister.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Horsemen of Death
  • X-Factor #32-35
  • Xartans
  • Superheroic triage
  • A vague prophecy
  • Fake Avengers
  • Fake-band disambiguation
  • KiLLeR DWaRfS
  • Crippled Puppies
  • Audiophile Apocalypse
  • Shopping
  • Dubiously zealous trademark protection
  • Acronym disambiguation
  • The death of Candy Southern
  • The not-exactly death of Cameron Hodge
  • Nanny
  • Orphan-Maker
  • Baby Race 2000
  • An orphanage that is also a metaphor
  • Unreliable narration
  • The dubious partnership of Mister Sinister and Apocalypse
  • Best iterations of Boom Boom

NEXT EPISODE: Excalibur goes ongoing!

InfernoWatch

  • Malicious inanimate objects
  • Early signs of Marvel Girl’s returning telepathy
  • First clues of Cyclops’s connection to Sinister
  • First mention of Goblin Queen by name

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Hang out with us on Imzy!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!