Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

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As Mentioned in Episode 488 – There Goes the Moon (Mutant X May, Part 3)

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Color-coded Horsemen of Apocalypse! (Mutant X #19)
What’s the magic word? (Mutant X #19)
Someone let that flying aerobics instructor in! The rain is going to wreck her hair! (Mutant X #20)
That A on his belt stands for Ally! (Mutant X #20)
Note that Charles Xavier’s Evil Mullet is never seen outside of these two panels. (Mutant X #21)
Not a bad riff on the Phoenix costume, honestly. (Mutant X #21)
And then Professor X turned into Doctor Fate. (Mutant X #22)
“That’s right, my friends! We must strike Galactus with every color of the traffic light!” (Mutant X #22)
You ever have a dream where someone is mean to you and then you’re still mad at them when you see them in real life? (Mutant X #23)
Behold! Bargain-basement X-Man, with bonus moppets! (Mutant X #23)
Just a hell of a cover. (Mutant X #24)
Why would you put a portal to the Negative Zone in the goddamn FLOOR?! At least put up a guard rail or something! I’m calling OSHA! (Mutant X #24)
Spoiler: they all just go to a bar. (Mutant X #25)
Flowers for Beast-gernon. (Yes, yes, we know Algernon is the mouse.) (Mutant X #25)
ah jeez (Mutant X #25)
It’s cool, Bloodstorm. We’ve all been there. (Mutant X #26)
The Marauders! (Mutant X #26)
Meet Dagger. And also sorta Cloak. (Mutant X #27)
Awwwwww (Mutant X #27)
Okay, that kid is way too chill. (Mutant X #28)
That’s way better than Evil Xavier’s mullet! (Mutant X #29)
Why, it’s the brand new Sabre-Roaster 3000, as seen on TV! (Mutant X #29)
Plus Iron Giant Man, but he’s too big for this panel! (Mutant X #30)
(This caption intentionally left blank) (Mutant X #31)
After this, they blow up the moon! (Mutant X #31)
The Beyonder x-plains Mutant X! And also eats Captain America. (Mutant X Annual 2001)
It’s really hard to pick a favorite! (Mutant X Annual 2001)
Benjamin E. Yonder, you put the population of New York City down right now! (Mutant X Annual 2001)
Well, I would have said “WHAT?!” (Mutant X #32)
Dracula dies not with a bang, but with a PFFFT. (Mutant X #32)
*sniffle* (Mutant X #32)
Goodbye, Earth-1298. It’s been a hell of a ride. (Mutant X #32)
NEXT TIME: Black ops in black leather!

488 – There Goes the Moon (Mutant X May, Part 3)

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In which we reap the consequences of our choices; possession is 18/10 of the law; Sinister dresses for the occasion; Hank gets his groove back; Havok of Earth-1298 is a jerk; Hank loses his groove; Captain America blows up the moon; the Beyonder experiences a stirring; Dracula makes a deal; and Mutant X May comes to an end.

X-PLAINED:

  • The aftermath of Mutant X
  • Mutant X #19-32
  • Mutant X Annual 2001
  • The story so far
  • Character color coding
  • Some telepathic misdirection
  • Apocalypse of Earth-1298
  • Charles Xavier of Earth-1298
  • Professor X’s Juggernaut-fightin’ mullet
  • A whole lot of possession
  • Fake Galactus
  • Several fears
  • X-Man of Earth-1298
  • Child batteries
  • The worst place for a portal to the Negative Zone
  • How Hank McCoy became the Brute
  • Vampire problems
  • The Marauders of Earth-1298
  • The Outcasts of Earth-1298
  • Cloak & Dagger of Earth-1298
  • James Hudson of Earth-1298
  • The Avengers of Earth-1298
  • The Beyonder of Earth-1298 who is also kind of the Goblin Force
  • Several additional superheroes
  • A last stand
  • The appeal of alternate timelines
  • Earth-1298’s best glow-ups

NEXT EPISODE: Attack of the Meatspore Stormtroopers!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 485 – The House of Correction

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Being the boss means you get the yellow pouches! (Generation X #63)
Teenagers! (Generation X #63)
The new and… improved… Emma Frost. (Generation X #63)
DEAR GOD THOSE PANTS (Generation X #63)
Remember, this issue came out before we knew what happened to Synch… (Generation X #63)
NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE (Generation X #64)
Fashion? (Generation X #64)
Fashion! (Generation X #64)
Jubilee, you are the worstbest. (Generation X #64)
The most dangerous game! (Generation X #64)
Super-speed, part one! (Generation X #65)
Super-speed, part two! (Generation X #65)
I see no flaws with this plan. (Generation X #65)
We have our complaints about this era, but… man, it can just be so charming! (Generation X #65)
I have so many questions, and yet I do not want them answered. (Generation X #66)
Miles just saw Eraserhead at a David Lynch retrospective, and you know that mix of revulsion and pity you feel toward the baby in that movie? …yeah. (Generation X #66)
Banshee, you rule and we’re sorry everyone always forgets you exist. (Generation X #66)
An only slightly less abrupt ending than that of X-Factor #149. (Generation X #66)
NEXT TIME: Yes, really.

485 – The House of Correction

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In which we go back to the future of Generation X; Jay once again gets pedantic about lettering; Generation X takes on the carceral state; we take a deep dive into the late ‘90s; Jubilee does her best Nick Fury; and superpowers should be noisier.

X-PLAINED:

  • Earth-14042
  • Marvel Disk Wars: The Avengers
  • Generation X #63-66
  • Revolution and Counter X (more) (again)
  • An evil Oyster
  • Warden Coffin
  • The Decency Defecit
  • Some shit we wish was fictional
  • Underpants
  • Souped up powers
  • Newsgroups
  • The Columbine school shooting
  • The Grid
  • Cable vs. ISDN Internet
  • Jonathan Somers
  • Generation X’s new costumes
  • The House of Correction
  • Hacking
  • Trophies
  • Baxter
  • ‘90s X-Men outside of comics
  • How superpowers sound

NEXT EPISODE: Mutant X May begins!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 481 – Chekhov’s Butt-Gun

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In which Adrienne Frost flirts with a corpse. (Generation X #67)
Oh man, Monet’s left sock is going to be all wet and gross for the rest of the morning… (Generation X #67)
I used to love it when the cafeteria served GReeBo C back in high school. (Generation X #67)
I think those bullies were held back a few years… like maybe 30 or so. (Generation X #67)
Just some really fun faces on this page. (Generation X #67)
NO PRETTY BOYS. (Generation X #67)
It’s like a romance comic cover exploded! (Generation X #68)
Hey, that shirt’s just painted on! (Generation X #68)
Teens are the worst, Jubilee. (Generation X #68)
“And I assure you, that’s far from the most dangerous thing in this skirt.” (Generation X #68)
Everyone reacts to bad news in their own way. Penance’s way is to stick a Mjolnir sticker to her face. (Generation X #68)
Well shit. (Generation X #68)
The snowy calm before the fiery storm. (Generation X #69)
“The Leprechauns of Cassidy Keep never gave me this much grief.” (Generation X #69)
What fighting game is this supposed to be?! And don’t say Ninja Boogie! (Generation X #69)
Effortless. (Generation X #69)
What is this, Black Friday? (Generation X #70)
Kid’s got a point, Sean. (Generation X #70)
You really feel the crush of humanity in this issue. (Generation X #70)
Everett Thomas: hero ’til the end. (Generation X #70)
Bye, Adrienne. See ya never. (Generation X #70)
Left-to-right, the answers will be: make bad decisions as part of X-Factor, become a vampire mom, have sex with Angel in the sky above Ma Guthrie, get crucified on the X-Mansion’s lawn, and find out you’re a descendent of Apocalypse. (Generation X #70)
NEXT TIME: X-Force goes Counter-X!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING:

481 – Chekhov’s Butt-Gun

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In which Adrienne Frost is absolutely terrible (and so was Ronald Reagan); you should not put guns in your butt; Synch deserved better; and Jay and Miles inventory their favorite dangling plot threads of the ‘90s.

X-PLAINED:

  • Several potential origins of Havok’s stupid hat
  • Generation X #67-70
  • Revolution (more) (again)
  • Shockwave (more) (again)
  • Adrienne Frost (more) (again)
  • The New Xavier School and/or Massachusetts Academy (more) (again)
  • Possible necrophilia
  • Dorm life
  • How not to draw clothing
  • Rules of entry to Jubilee’s dorm room
  • The Rich Person Store
  • How to say the word “consigliere”
  • The ‘90s
  • Blackmail
  • Limits of telepathy
  • Arson
  • Ninja Boogie
  • Panic
  • How to keep Synch safe
  • Adultification
  • Failure to keep Synch safe
  • Where to pick up to follow along with us
  • Plot threads we’d like to see picked back up

NEXT EPISODE: X-Force goes Counter-X!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 476 – The Moppets Take Manhattan

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Moppets on the run! (Generation X #59)
The meme before the meme but after the thing that became the meme. (Generation X #59)
Generation X vs. New Warriors. (Generation X #59)
Can’t really argue with that. (Generation X #59)
R.I.P., Butter Rum. (Generation X #59)
Oh, hey, it’s Mondo! (Generation X #60)
I don’t know if it’s the pose, or the color and font of the text, or what, but I can’t shake the idea that this is their holiday card. (Generation X #60)
Have you ever seen him in the same place as Santa? I REST MY CASE. (Generation X #61)
Spirit Halloween Hellfire Club. (Generation X #60)
Look at this silly-ass Dracula. (Generation X #60)
He will hypnotize you with the power of… ugly wallpaper! (Generation X #61)
Vampire quick-change? (Generation X #62)
Vampire quick-change! (Generation X #62)
NEXT EPISODE: Ages of Apocalypse!

Links & Further Conflagrations:

476 – The Moppets Take Manhattan

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In which we remain adamant pro-POG advocates; Artie and Leech have adventures; Firestar and Emma Frost get some resolution; Santa Claus may or may not be the avatar of Cyttorak; Black Tom Cassidy exceeds expectations; and Monet has vampire problems.

X-PLAINED:

  • Marvel’s Revolution line
  • POGs (somewhat) (again)
  • Who’s on Generation X these days
  • Generation X #59-62
  • Artie and Leech’s adventures in NYC
  • Holidays at the Massachusetts Academy
  • Cordelia Frost (more) (again)
  • Mondo (the real one)
  • Santa Claus / Juggernaut disambiguation
  • An overly convoluted plot
  • Parenting?
  • St. Croix family problems
  • Vampire problems
  • Legacies of Generation X

NEXT EPISODE: Ages of Apocalypse!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 468 – Sasquatch Road Trip

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Based on that kid’s shirt, Penance is really protective of fans of Harley Quinn? Yeah, I can see it. (Generation X #58)
“I just barely got away before she gave me a really questionable haircut!” (Generation X #58)
Generation X isn’t always autumnal… but it’s often autumnal. (Generation X #58)
What do you think they’re singing? My vote’s for the a cappella portion of Bohemian Rhapsody. (Generation X #58)
“Dad, you always take his side!” (Generation X #58)
Bigfoots and sharp ladies: natural enemies since the dawn of time. (Generation X #58)
Know what question she won’t answer? Literally anything about what her deal is now that she’s no longer inhabited by St. Croixes. (Generation X #58)
Hugh Jackman is fine and all, but I want Wolverine to look like that in the next X-Men movie. (Generation X Annual 1999)
“But horses? Horses make a man strong. Lady horses? Not sure what to make of those.” (Generation X Annual 1999)
I guess I wouldn’t remember that guy either. (Generation X Annual 1999)
Jubilee’s actually really good at this stuff. (Generation X Annual 1999)
Still less panic-inducing than the original iPhone alarm sound. (Generation X Annual 1999)
Smokin’ Dad Pipes, talkin’ about Dad Stuff. (Generation X Annual 1999)
Nice pacing. (Generation X Annual 1999)
Angelo Espinosa, reverse alarm clock. (Generation X Annual 1999)
And then Jubilee fired her fireworks up in the air while going AHHHHH. (Generation X Annual 1999)
Goodbyes, part one. (Generation X Annual 1999)
Goodbyes, part two. (Generation X Annual 1999)
NEXT TIME: Wolverine’s dead! And Wolverine’s back!

468 – Sasquatch Road Trip

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In which St. Croix History reminds us of a Martian with a big butt; Penance’s escape is ambiguous; Avengers Academy Infinity Comic successfully reinvents Emplate; you should not learn to flirt from Vanilla Ice; Jubilee fires two fireworks blasts into the air whilst going aaahhh; and we go in through the ears.

X-PLAINED:

  • Apocalypse’s influence
  • The Big House (about which we are confused)
  • Generation X #58
  • Cartier and/or Louis St. Croix
  • Our college’s Dean, naked jogger
  • Things that are sharp in the woods
  • HUMP
  • Penance (Hollow)
  • Emplate, spoiled teenager
  • Generation X Annual 1999
  • Epistolary fonts
  • Jubilee’s pre-X past
  • Round Wolverine
  • Hunter Brawn (again, sigh)
  • Recognizing random dudes from pictures
  • Dad Things and Dad Pipes
  • Juggernaut and Black Tom as a relationship model
  • Jubilee, competent veteran
  • A murder mystery
  • Legault, cosplaying bodyguard
  • Taking notes on comics
  • Magneto’s telepathy-blocking (or not) helmet

NEXT EPISODE: Wolverine’s dead! And Wolverine’s back!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!