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As Mentioned in Episode 339 – Luck Be a Lady

July 11, 2021 Jay Leave a comment

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(Press the “i” icon in the bottom-right to see captions in the gallery. It’s a known WordPress bug we’re still looking for a way around!)

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Wolverine, now with 100% less nose. (Uncanny X-Men #332)

Because no X-Man has ever made a worse decision, ever, right? (Uncanny X-Men #332)

Honestly, I’d be worried, too. (Uncanny X-Men #332)

Aw, Nate. (Uncanny X-Men #332)

Way to make it weird, Logan. (Wolverine #101)

Never not adorable. (Wolverine #101)

Elektra cameo! (Wolverine #101)

Meanwhile in a Bob Ross painting… (Uncanny X-Men Annual 1996)

Preacher needs to get better at stretching his canvases. (Uncanny X-Men Annual 1996)

The Bishop carry. (Uncanny X-Men Annual 1996)

Ouch. (Uncanny X-Men Annual 1996)

Oh, THAT guy, again. (Uncanny X-Men Annual 1996)

Seriously, this seems logistically unlikely. (Uncanny X-Men Annual 1996)

Depixelization is no fun, apparently. (Uncanny X-Men Annual 1996)

And she’s back! (Uncanny X-Men Annual 1996)

NEXT EPISODE: X.S.E.!

LINKS & FURTHER TOMFOOLERY

Learn more about Preacher in Episode 317 – Acquaintances of Humanity.
Kate Beaton’s Wolverine is an eternal delight.
Please note that Dave Cockrum’s art of Nightcrawler and Storm doing that is not remotely work-safe.

339 – Luck Be a Lady

July 11, 2021 Jay 4 comments

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In which evil robots are fundamentally more optimistic than climate change; Ozymandias could probably use a new hobby; Wolverine goes full Kate Beaton; “Luck Be a Lady” would be a kickass hymn; Shard gets a body (kinda); and the X-Men definitely do that.

X-PLAINED:

Some of Stryfe’s team-ups
Fatal Attractions (briefly)
X-Cutioner’s Song (briefly)
Genesis / Tolliver / Tyler Dayspring
Several other individuals named Genesis
Lost noses, historical and fictional
Uncanny X-Men #332
Wolverine #100-101
Uncanny X-Men Annual 1996
Zoe Culloden (The Expediter)
Ozymandias
Wolverine, golden retriever
An Elektra cameo
Wild Thing
Bishop and Shard (again)
The return of Preacher
The Hound (again)
A reunion
Deplxelation
Krakoan team niches
What heroes do

NEXT: X.S.E.

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 331 – Surprised by Brood

April 25, 2021 Jay 2 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

…Maybe it’s one of those really small motels where none of the bedding matches? I don’t know. (X-Men vs. Brood #1)

Secret Origins of Hannah Conover, part 1 of 2. (X-Men vs. Brood #1)

Secret Origins of Hannah Conover, part 2 of 2. (X-Men vs. Brood #1)

Meet the Firstborn! (X-Men vs. Brood #1)

Lookitthat blastin’-mussed hair! (X-Men vs. Brood #1)

And wet hair! Brian Hitch is a treasure. (X-Men vs. Brood #1)

She protec but she also attac (X-Men vs. Brood #1)

I dunno, man; angels are pretty weird. (X-Men vs. Brood #1)

#relationshipgoals (X-Men vs. Brood #1)

And she’s still in that pod today. Somewhere. Probably. (X-Men vs. Brood #1)

Maybe Chick tracts have made me excessively cynical about Jesus showing up in comic books. (X-Men vs. Brood #1)

NEXT EPISODE: And so they do.

LINKS & FURTHER INFESTATIONS:

Learn more about Hannah’s origins in Episode 95 – Earthfall!

331 – Surprised by Brood

April 25, 2021 Jay 11 comments

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In which we take a break from the lead-up to Onslaught; Hannah Conover is the queen of dangling plot threads (and also of the Brood); Wolverine is the strangest angel; William Conover is the chillest minister in the Marvel Universe; and Excalibur writer Tini Howard gives us the inside scoop on Gambit’s trench coat.

X-PLAINED:

Mutant Brood
The Brood vs. Brood X cicadas
X-Men vs. Brood: Day of Wrath #1-2
Theological origins of John Ostrander
Hair
An unspoken motif in pin-up art
Reverend William Conover (more)(again)
Hannah Conover (more)(again)
The Brood (more)(again)
The Brood Empress
The Firstborn
Atypical Queen-Broodling power dynamics
Brood of the future
A strange angel
What Gambit’s trench coat is made of

NEXT WEEK: Hawk Talk

NEXT EPISODE: The end of the Externals!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 330 – Suddenly, Ninjas

April 25, 2021 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Photo backgrounds are among his arcane talents. (Uncanny X-Men #329)

*skitter* (Uncanny X-Men #329)

Seriously, I love this concept. (Uncanny X-Men #329)

If I had a dollar for every time I’d seen an angry man pull a tiny dude out of the back of an old woman, I would be… well, broke, but that’s not the point. (Uncanny X-Men #329)

Ah, yes, the sacred goth club. (Uncanny X-Men #329)

Seriously, there is no reasonable justification for this. (Uncanny X-Men #330)

Note: He pulled that figurine out of Archangel’s chest. (Uncanny X-Men #330)

Looks like one of those days. (X-Men #50)

Sure, why not? (X-Men #50)

WHY DOES HE LOOK LIKE BEAST? (X-Men #50)

Another day, another giant floating head in the Xavier manor. (X-Men #50)

NEXT EPISODE: Brooding.

330 – Suddenly, Ninjas

April 18, 2021 Jay 40 comments

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In which the podcast turns seven; Matt has officially edited half the podcast; a lot of things are made by metal; Doctor Strange is a big weirdo; Gambit is a scoundrel, not a villain; Wolverine goes goth; Onslaught could probably use a better herald; Bishop fires two guns whilst going aaaaaaa; and we commit to making what sense we can of Onslaught.

X-PLAINED:

How Betsy got her body back
Several simultaneous anniversaries
Uncanny X-Men #329-330
X-Men #50
Some ninja bullshit
A lot of less-benign-than-it-looks racism
Excellent use of a neon sign
An odd couple
The evolution of art tools
Steam vs. metal
Gomurr the Ancient
The Ebon Vein
Catastrophic magic
Our favorite iterations of Doctor Strange
The Crimson Dawn
How one becomes Gomurr the Ancient
Tar (Proctor of the Crimson Dawn)
Post (Herald of Onslaught)
An entity who may or may not be Onslaught
Continuity party tricks
Survivors of the Age of Apocalypse

NEXT EPISODE: Brood X!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 325 – Captain Bloodscream

February 28, 2021 Jay One comment

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

I’m sorry; I cannot accept this as Cable. (X-Force/Cable Annual 1995)

The Impossible Teens. (X-Force/Cable Annual 1995)

Yay, Team-Ups! (Spider-Man Team-Up #1)

Tessa, Shade Queen of the Hellfire Club. Spider-Man Team-Up #1

SERIOUSLY, WHAT IS THE GOLD CROTCH THING (Spider-Man Team-Up #1)

Also Tessa. (Spider-Man Team-Up #1)

NO, SERIOUSLY: 30-50 FERAL HOGS. (X-Men Unlimited #9)

FUCKING GHOST PIRATES Y’ALL (X-Men Unlimited #9)

YES AS A MATTER OF FACT I WILL BE CAPTIONING ALL THE IMAGES FROM THIS ISSUE IN ALL CAPS (X-Men Unlimited #9)

LOOK AT THIS MAN. THIS IS A MAN LIVING HIS DREAM. (X-Men Unlimited #9)

SURE WHY NOT (X-Men Unlimited #9)

SHARK FIGHT SHARK FIGHT (X-Men Unlimited #9)

THIS VISUAL IS LIKE ALL THE GOOFINESS OF THE EPISODE IN A NUTSHELL (X-Men Unlimited #9)

KING OF THE CAT PEOPLE (X-Men Unlimited #9)

FOOTNOTES FOR THE FOOTNOTE GODS (X-Men Unlimited #9)

FISH! FISH OF DECEIT! (X-Men Unlimited #9)

OH HEY WE KNOW THAT GUY (X-Men Unlimited #9)

THE NEXT TWO IMAGES WILL JUST BE KICKASS BLOODSCREAM YOU’RE WELCOME (X-Men Unlimited #9)

I WISH HIM THE BEST (X-Men Unlimited #9)

NEXT EPISODE: The Adversary probably does not actually join X-Factor.

325 – Captain Bloodscream

February 28, 2021 Jay 12 comments

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In which we recommend against having a birthday in the Marvel Universe; Shinobi Shaw was a proto-Quentin Quire; Lee Forrester returns under the best possible circumstances; Bloodscream lives his best unlife; Belasco is apparently master of the cat people now; and a former Marvel intern returns to solve a mystery.

X-PLAINED:

Bloodscream (again)
X-Force/Cable Annual 1995
Spider-Man Team-Up #1
X-Men Unlimited #9
The Impossible Man (and his slacker kids)
The Clone Saga
Benedict Kine
A really superlative insult
The continuity box
Still more Bloodscream
30-50 feral hogs
GHOST PIRACY
Belasco (more)(again)
The N’garai (more) (again)
A follow-up to a mystery from Episode #323

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor vs. the Adversary

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 317 – Acquaintances of Humanity

December 20, 2020 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Oh, c’mon, you did NOT need a double gatefold for that. (X-Men #45)

OW.

(Not a metaphor.) (X-Men #45)

Included to showcase some really damn good use of balloon and caption placement. (X-Men #45)

Aw, Rogue. (X-Men #45)

Damn, that’s good composition. (X-Men #45)

Just here to rub salt in the wound by out-glamming you. (X-Men #45)

It’s true: there’s something extra sad about brooding in shorts. (Uncanny X-Men #326)

IT SURE IS 1995 IN HERE. (Uncanny X-Men #326)

Seriously, Boomer, don’t be friends with Sabretooth. (Uncanny X-Men #326)

To those of you who get reaction images from these: You’re welcome. (Uncanny X-Men #326)

Gambit clearly subscribes to the Rory Campbell school of rehabilitation. (Uncanny X-Men #326)

Well, WE certainly recognize it! (Uncanny X-Men #326)

Now, that’s a wraparound cover! (X-Men Annual 1995)

Somebody’s been reading Age of Apocalypse. (X-Men Annual 1995)

“They’re never sure how many of them they are, and the uncertainty is difficult to live with.” (X-Men Annual 1995)

These three look like time travelers dressed in what each is certain everyone was wearing in 1995. (X-Men Annual 1995)

At least they’re stylish? I guess? (X-Men Annual 1995)

“I see hair more glam than any in this universe.” (X-Men Annual 1995)

“Several, at this point.” (X-Men Annual 1995)

Well, kinda. (X-Men Annual 1995)

Also, they all, um, teleported away. To a farm. Where they can run and play with the other villains. (X-Men Annual 1995)

NEXT: Leprechauns, obviously.

317 – Acquaintances of Humanity

December 14, 2020 Jay 12 comments

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In which Nicholas Cage is more of a concept than a human being; Rogue’s angst-fueled road trip continues; Gambit and Sinister have complementary aesthetics; there are a lot of Guthries; the Trasks are never up to any good; and whether or not it is canon, Ghost Rider has definitely teamed up with Johnny Cash.

X-PLAINED:

Ghost Rider (film)
Nicholas Cage
Rogue and Gambit
X-Men #45
Uncanny X-Men #326
Uncanny X-Men Annual 1995
A gratuitous gatefold
Alliteration vs. consonance
Osmium
Fancy captions
Aesthetics
Shorts
Gambit vs. Sabretooth
Questionable medical policy
AIDS and the Legacy Virus, revisited
Humanity’s Last Stand
Guthries
Preacher
The evolution of killer robots
Superhero-musician team-ups
Otherworld vs. the M’Kraan crystal

NEXT EPISODE: THE LEPRECHAUNS RETURN

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

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