Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: john byrne

As Mentioned in Episode 143 – Seduction of the Innocent

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Illustration by David Wynne
Crusader X has a somewhat expanded power set. (Excalibur #21)
Whatthewho, now? (Excalibur #21)
Okay, but that’s actually a pretty rad outfit. (Excalibur #21)
Or any of a large number of other supervillains, but, y’know. (Excalibur #21)
Okay, this Earth’s Hellfire Club is WAY creepier than the one on 616. (Excalibur #21)
So close, and yet so far… (Excalibur #21)
Well, damn. (Excalibur #21)
More X-analogues from Earth-2122. (Excalibur #22)
Well, no, but… (Excalibur #22)
The personification of a dropped plot thread. (Excalibur #22)
Aw, these wacky kids. (Excalibur #22)
ALAN DAVIS! WE MISSED YOU! (Excalibur #23)
The evil trinity. I would totally read an ongoing comic about these three. (Excalibur #23)
One more evil Illyana, just for fun. (Excalibur #23)
Justicer Bull! (Excalibur #23)
That last word balloon, tho. (Excalibur #23)
This is the last Evil Illyana panel. We promise. BUT IT’S SO AWESOME. (Excalibur #23)
Well. That’s… unambiguous. (Excalibur #24)
Meanwhile… (Excalibur #24)
THOSE MATCHING HAIR SWOOPS! (Excalibur #24)
It’s okay. She just sends ’em home. (Excalibur #24)
“I got just what I wanted! SUBTEXT!” (Excalibur #24)
NEXT EPISODE: 2017 Winter Special, featuring Kid Apocalypse and (hopefully) Dennis Hopeless!

143 – Seduction of the Innocent

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Art by David Wynne.

In which the Cross-Time Caper has finally outstayed its welcome; we bid a reluctant farewell to Alan Davis; Inferno may or may not finally actually be over; Evil Doug Ramsey rocks our socks; the Shadow King is not a particularly nuanced villain; Kitty Pryde celebrates a birthday; and Courtney Ross represents an awful lot of dangling plot threads.

X-PLAINED:

  • Nocturne
  • Excalibur #21-24
  • The end of the Cross-Time Caper
  • Post-Alan Davis Excalibur
  • Chris Wozniak
  • Crusader X
  • Earth-2122
  • How to track Excalibur
  • Phoenix-related telepathic idiosyncracies
  • Our general indifference to the Shadow King
  • An alternate history of Earth-811
  • Earth-23238
  • An extended Judge Dredd riff
  • Puberty
  • Another John Byrne cameo
  • Several variations on Courtney Ross
  • Kitty Pryde’s 15th birthday
  • Nightcrawler’s beard
  • The Siege Courageous

NEXT EPISODE: Giant-Size Winter Special, featuring Kid Apocalypse & Dennis Hopeless!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

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As Mentioned in Episode 13 – Last Stand on the Moon

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You can tell she’s evil on account of the foreshortening. (X-Men #135)
Well, that escalated quickly. (X-Men #135)
“Inexorable” is a word we use a lot when talking about the Dark Phoenix Saga. This is one of those moments that can only lead in one devastating direction. (X-Men #135)
You can tell it’s a big deal because of the cameos… (X-Men #135)
…and the cross-promotion. Hi, Silver Surfer! (X-Men #135)
MALEFIC DESTINY! Claremont can be pretty overwrought, but for a story like this, we would argue that he is PRECISELY WROUGHT ENOUGH. (X-Men #135)
See, shit like this? This is why “malefic destiny” is an entirely appropriate and to-scale phrase. (X-Men #135)
AND THAT’S WHY YOU ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE! (X-Men #135)
The Shi’ar: Why You Can’t Have Nice Things. (X-Men #136)
But first, a brief round of Danger Room exposition! (X-Men #136)
In John Grey’s defense, “what to do when your child is possessed by a potentially malevolent cosmic force” is really not covered adequately in most parenting books. (X-Men #136)
Comics Wolverine > Movie Wolverine. (X-Men #136)
If Xander’s crayon speech from that one Buffy episode is not direct homage to this scene, I will EAT MY HAT, and also your hat. (X-Men #136)
GOD DAMNIT, PROFESSOR X. (X-Men #136)
And THAT’S how you do a high-stakes psychic duel! (X-Men #136)
This will definitely not come back to haunt you. DEFINITELY NOT. (X-Men #136)
Maybe we will just put this cover in every single “as mentioned” gallery forever. Really, it deserves it. (X-Men #137)
The Watcher is like the narrative equivalent of pullquotes. (X-Men #137)
One step closer to the end. (X-Men #137)
But first, Beast pretty definitely gets a happy ending from a space massage therapist with epic green sideburns! (X-Men #137)
Again: Comics Wolverine > Movie Wolverine. (X-Men #137)
“I’ll take ‘scenes that always make Rachel tear up’ for 200, Alex.” (X-Men #137)
Yeah. (X-Men #137)
TEAMWORK! (X-Men #137)
“I’ll take ‘scenes that always make Rachel tear up’ for 1000, Alex.” (X-Men #137)
Can we have a moment of silence for this completely and absolutely perfect page? (X-Men #137)
The (definitely absolutely 100% permanent) death of Phoenix. (X-Men #137)
This is one of those covers that will be riffed and referenced until the end of time. (X-Men #138)
X-Men #138 renders 11 of the last 12 episodes of this podcast pretty much redundant.
The end… (X-Men #138)
…and the beginning. (X-Men #138)

P.S. We have some rad new stuff in our store, including dark-background Magneto Made Some Valid Points shirts and Chris Haley’s spiffy new YAYBO! design! Go buy shirts so we can buy comics!

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13 – Last Stand on the Moon

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In which Jean commits genocide, the Shi’ar are total dicks (again), we have feelings about X-Men #137, Claremont and Byrne do what they do best, shit gets real on the moon, Kitty joins the team, and the Dark Phoenix Saga concludes.

 

X-Plained:

  • Inhumans
  • The Kree
  • The Terrigen Mist
  • Teamwork
  • The Dark Phoenix
  • Cameos with cosmic implications
  • The Phoenix event horizon
  • Establishing scale
  • Psychic battles
  • The winged never-nudes of the Marvel Universe
  • Danger-room exposition
  • The Shi’ar’s really dubious justice system
  • Why X-Men #137 is the definitive issue of X-Men
  • Pacing
  • The power of friendship
  • Quiet moments
  • The blue area of the moon
  • The best last stand
  • Moon vandalism
  • The Phoenix Retcon

You can find a visual companion to the episode – and links to recommended reading – on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

As Mentioned In Episode 10 – Not All Mandroids

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Multiple Man’s powers essentiall make him a retcon elemental.
Punching pterosaurs is the gift that keeps on giving. (X-Men #114)
Best Worst Reveal (X-Men #114)
“Robes” (X-Men #114)
We really can’t fault Cyclops for giving up on trying to explain Sauron. (X-Men #115)
The final fight of X-Men #116 Dark City.
Remember when we didn’t know everything about Wolverine? (X-Men #118)
Sadly, this story is really low on Sunfire Sass. Misty Knight, however, is AWESOME. (X-Men #118)
Mandroids. (X-Men #118)
Moses Magnum, P.I. (X-Men #118)
Heist stories are the best stories. (X-Men #119)
That’s Mariko Yoshida. She’s going to be really important later. (X-Men #120)
And that’s why you always leave a note. (X-Men #118)
Spoiler: Nope. (X-Men #109)
Alpha Flight. (X-Men #120)
Vindicator is a thoughtful antagonist. (X-Men #120)
Not actually episode-relevant. We just think these panels are hilarious. (X-Men #120)
Wolverine, we are pretty sure the APA would not approve of your approach to therapy. (X-Men #122)
Don’t fuck with Storm. (X-Men #122)
Ugh, THIS guy. (X-Men #122)
Based on the graffiti, this apartment was previously occupied by the 1970s Marvel bullpen. (X-Men #122)
Cyclops comes to terms with dynamic storytelling. (X-Men #125)
This is an awesome reunion, and notable as one of the only times Cyclops has ever successfully completed a hug. (X-Men #125)
Well, that’s portentous. (X-Men #104)
Angus McWhirter has REALLY STRONG FEELINGS about hovercraft. (X-Men #119)
Moira MacTaggert does science in a superhero uniform, because, comic books. (X-Men #125)
Proteus’s secondary mutation is superhuman levels of creepiness. (X-Men #127)
Well, damn. (X-Men #128)

10 – Not All Mandroids

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In which Phoenix has nothing on Jamie Madrox when it comes to retcons, Pterosaurs have super punchable faces, Colossus gets laid, we are uninterested in the Savage Land, Wolverine and Storm are both pretty interesting, smiling costs extra if you’re Doctor Doom, Banshee saves the day, Alpha Flight tries, Angry Hovercraft Guy comes back, and Proteus is fairly upsetting.

X-Plained:

  • X-Men #109, 114-16, 118-122, and 125-128
  • Multiple Man
  • Metacontinuity
  • The Savage Land
  • Pterosaurs
  • Shi’ar mustache technology
  • Karl Lykos
  • Misty Knight
  • Colleen Wing
  • Wolverine in Japan
  • Mandroids
  • Moses Magnum
  • A Heist
  • Angus McWhirter, disgruntled hovercraft rental guy
  • Alpha Flight
  • Team Dynamics
  • Why you always leave a note
  • Proteus

You can find a visual companion to the episode – and links to recommended reading – on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Next week: Secret origins, shipper wars, the Siege Perilous, and which of us would win in a fight.

As Mentioned in Episode 8 – What We Talk About When We Talk About Claremont

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In a moment of clarity, Cyclops recognizes that the X-Men’s greatest enemy is, in fact, the guy writing the book. (X-Men #96)
Never change, Sunfire. (X-Men #94)
Check out that sweet Dave Cockrum training montage. (X-Men #94)
Welcome to the X-Men, Thunderbird! Hope you survive the… oh. (X-Men #95)
This panel isn’t all that plot-relevant. We just think Havok’s powers look super cool. (X-Men #97)
“There can’t be TWO bondage vikings running around the Marvel universe!” (X-Men #97)
Professor Xavier’s nightmares are AWESOME. (X-Men #97)
Steven Lang: Stable and upstanding member of society. (X-Men #96)
In the Silver Age, superhero romance was limited to soulful gazes and ongoing sexual harassment. (X-Men #98)
I don’t know why they all look so surprised. (X-Men #98)
Cyclops obliterating a Sentinel: never gets old. (X-Men #98)
As far as we can tell, he swam here. From the middle of the ocean. Dr. Peter Corbeau: Ph.D. Badassitude. (X-Men #98)
Those are actually Sentinels designed to look and act like the original X-Men, because, Steven Lang. Just run with it. (X-Men #99)
Oh, hey, it’s the first Fastball Special! (X-Men #100)
You know how we say Jean Grey is underrated? Jean Grey is freakin’ underrated. (X-Men #100)
Aw. man. This whole scene. (X-Men #100)
The (first) death of Jean Grey. (X-Men #100)
And then… (X-Men #101)
This page still gives us chills. (X-Men #101)
Next week: Leprechauns. We’re not even joking.

Links and further reading:

FanBros

Chris Claremont’s X-Men

Episode 05 – The Retcon That Walks Like a Man (Covering Giant-Size X-Men #1)

8 – What We Talk About When We Talk About Claremont

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In which Chris Claremont defines the X-Universe; Sunfire quits the team (again); Nightcrawler is the best; the narrator is nobody’s friend; Colossus is a good kid; Cyclops has a long series of bad days; everyone is a bondage Viking; Rachel is a space pedant, we meet the Phoenix, and Wolverine is the Batman of Marvel.

X-Plained:

  • Polaris’s kinda-powers
  • Our first crossover event
  • How much we love you
  • Chris Claremont, and why he’s the definitive X-writer
  • Comics In Focus: Chris Claremont’s X-Men
  • Why Nightcrawler is the best point-of-view character
  • The long game
  • Tom Orzechowski’s dimension-folding lettering skills
  • Claremontisms
  • The malicious narrator
  • Count Nefaria
  • Sliding-scale ransom
  • The life, death, and occasional reanimation of Thunderbird
  • Friendship
  • The care and feeding of cairns
  • Erik the Red
  • Quiet moments
  • Sentinels and X-Sentinels
  • Steven Lang
  • The (first) death and return of Jean Grey
  • Accents

You can find a visual companion to the episode – and links to recommended reading – on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Next week: Leprechauns!