Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

As Mentioned in Episode 442 – MimeQuest 64

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A story in four parts. (X-Men Unlimited #22)
They have fun. (X-Men Unlimited #22)
In a world of clean-lined cartoony art, Logan is craggy. (X-Men Unlimited #22)
#roasted (X-Men Unlimited #22)
Any of the X-Men could wear that map as a dress! (X-Men Unlimited #22)
(New) Girl Talk (X-Men Unlimited #22)
A well-armed mime-litia. (X-Men Unlimited #22)
Patrick Gleason, master of visually engaging conversations. (X-Men Unlimited #22)
And you told your math teacher you’d never need to know this stuff in real life. (X-Men Unlimited #22)
Shadowcat and Marrow miniseries now, please! (X-Men Unlimited #22)
See, it’s funny, because normally MetroCards charge you! (X-Men Unlimited #22)
Space Ghost: “Dames are like mustard: they taste great on a sandwich. But when you’re not eating a sandwich… they just sit there in the fridge… on a shelf… in a jar… labeled… mustard.” (X-Men Unlimited #22)
1963! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1969! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1978! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1980 (but in the future of 2013)! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
Back to 1975! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1980 again, but not in an alternate future this time! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1982! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1985! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1999! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
1993! (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
Still 1993, but we had to include the Hate Goblin. (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
More 1993. Doom needs a bigger vacuum cleaner. (X-Men / Doctor Doom Annual 1998)
NEXT TIME: Miles talks X-Retail with Katie Pryde of Books With Pictures!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING:

442 – MimeQuest 64

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In which Marrow remains a connoisseur of dead rats; Jay has opinions about the NYC Subway system; U.L.T.I.M.A.T.U.M. are snazzy dressers; Doctor Doom gets excited about Onslaught; Magneto can have a rocket pack if he wants; villainous game recognizes villainous game; weird retcons are the best retcons; and you should totally come to our birthday party.

X-PLAINED:

  • A peculiar side effect of Wolverine’s healing factor
  • Jay & Miles on Bluesky (and other social media)
  • Our upcoming 10th birthday party and live show (and related announcements)
  • X-Men Unlimited #22
  • X-Men/Doctor Doom Annual 1998
  • An unpleasant way to wake up
  • That’s so Kraven
  • Avengers and transit cops
  • U.L.T.I.M.A.T.U.M.
  • Flag Smasher
  • Some miscellaneous New York Subway trivia
  • Audience stand-ins (and how the reading experience changes when the audience stand-in isn’t human-passing)
  • Additional New York Subway trivia
  • Premonitions of Onslaught
  • An X-Men highlight reel
  • A delightful little retcon
  • One way to ruin X-Men #137
  • Healing factor preferences

NEXT EPISODE: Miles and Katie Pryde X-Plain Comics Retail!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

RSVP to our birthday shenanigans!

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As Mentioned in Episode 441 – Dracu-tastic

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Sadly, not a sequel to Banshee’s Angels. (Generation X #48)
I mean, once or twice for most of them, but that’s considered pretty healthy by X-standards. (Generation X #48)
DO NOT TRUST THAT MAN JONO (Generation X #48)
I wish I could have all my arguments while fighting Asgardian trolls. (Generation X #48)
I feel like a lot of women end up making that face at Chamber. (Generation X #48)
Fair point, Gaia, albeit one that raises a number of questions… as do all your points. (Generation X #48)
Husk’s breakup haircut, meet Maggott’s cartoon hearts. (Generation X #49)
Constantine Francis Slaughter IV, level 60 Dwarven Hunter. (Generation X #49)
It’s probably good for Iceman’s self esteem that he never really hung out with Chamber. (Generation X #49)
Emma Frost x-plains Emma Frost. (Generation X #49)
Over the next 26 issues, Adrienne Frost will proceed to ruin absolutely everything. (Generation X #49)
Better or worse than syncing with Glob Herman? (Generation X #49)
Jay cannot even with this face. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
This issue – the highly collectible first appearance of Jubilee’s bunny slippers! (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
Such good horror movie staging. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
Look at these awesome weirdos. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
“BAT!” (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
“It’s the Scary Vampire, Charlie Brown!” (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
And then Dracula’s ghoul gave Chamber the D. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
Jubilee versus fonts. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
We’ve all been there, kid. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
Chamber’s Kirby krackle! Dracula’s impossibly long bloody claws! Husk’s deathly pallor! (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
Man, no one’s powers ever look as cool as when Synch uses them. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
A for effort, though. (Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998)
NEXT TIME: Victor Von Doom X-Plains the X-Men.

LINKS AND FURTHER READING

  • We talked about Dracula here and here!
  • Wet Leg probably met Dracula too.

441 – Dracu-tastic

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In which Banshee should eat the rich; the real Monet is way more of a jerk than the fake one; the Marvel Universe is the world inside your brain-case; Maggott joins and quits Generation X at almost the speed of Sunfire; Dracula gives Chamber the D; and if Jay and Miles die in this episode, they die in real life.

X-PLAINED:

  • Dracula as a universal standard
  • Earth-441
  • Generation X #48-49
  • The missed potential of 13,000-year-old teenager Gaia
  • The Jay Faerber run of Generation X
  • Emma and Banshee’s forgotten X-friendship
  • That time that Moira ripped off Banshee’s skin and wore it like a Halloween costume (again)
  • Cordelia Frost, Emma’s younger sister
  • Adrienne Frost, Emma’s older sister
  • Interpersonal arguments by way of Asgardian combat scenarios
  • Jubilee, fox; versus M, scorpion
  • Alaska, moping capital of the Marvel Universe
  • Clever scene transitions
  • Constantine Francis Slaughter IV and his mustache
  • Puberty as body horror
  • Husk’s breakup haircut
  • Slug emulation
  • Generation X / Dracula Annual 1998
  • The Council of Cross-Time Draculas
  • Chamber’s goofy face
  • Vampire fonts
  • Jubilee’s bunny slippers
  • Charlie Brown in Snow Valley
  • Count von Count (again)
  • Monsters as class metaphor
  • What would happen if Synch synced with Legion
  • Who would pronounce Cable like Britta Perry pronounces bagel

NEXT EPISODE: Victor Von Doom X-Plains the X-Men.

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 440 – Fightin’ and Ballin’

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Fight fight fight, fight fight fight! (X-Men #83)
PHWOOOOOSH PKOOOM YAAIIIHEEE SWOOOOOOOOOSSS (X-Men #83)
‘Sup, demonic sperm? (X-Men #83)
From organic steel to organic… whatever that is. (X-Men #83)
What if Pinocchio but evil Colossus-bot? (X-Men #83)
The other Cerebr(o/ite) design. (X-Men #83)
Design by David Cronenberg? (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Fight fight fight, fight fight fight! (Again again again!) (Uncanny X-Men #364)
The best version of Post. (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Wolverine: vigilante relationship counselor and motivational speaker. (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Eeeuuuugghhh (Uncanny X-Men #364)
Charles Xavier: the world’s most ripped telepath. (X-Men #84)
Cerebro Prime has almost completed its Pokédex! (X-Men #84)
Colossus practices his witty banter. (X-Men #84)
Oil and razor blades and cotton candy and (X-Men #84)
The Xavier Protocols are gorier than expected. (X-Men #84)
Imagine all the people (X-Men #84)
Back home and back to the status quo. (X-Men #84)
NEXT TIME: Dracula.

Links and further reading:

440 – Fightin’ and Ballin’

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From organic steel to organic… whatever that is. (X-Men #83)

In which the Hunt for Xavier remains vaguely disappointing; Gambit is good with kids; nanomachines are the new unstable molecules; Marrow is a walking armory; and we recommend comics for babies.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Hunt for Xavier, Part 2
  • Babies and/or ghosts
  • Chekhov’s repowering
  • X-Men #83-84
  • Uncanny X-Men #364
  • Cerebro / Cerebro Prime
  • Cerebrite Alpha
  • Cerebrite Beta
  • X-Men serial numbers
  • What Gambit’s friends call him
  • How Miles stopped worrying and learned to love Gambit
  • Evil robot sperm
  • Mary Purcell
  • Multiple-monitor displays
  • A computer with a computer
  • AI
  • The Florida facility
  • Post
  • Pile-Driver X
  • A glimpse into the butt of all humanity
  • Comics for babies
  • Name-based powers

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X has Dracula problems!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 439 – Fishfic

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A very loud search party. (Uncanny X-Men #362)
Stooges in shorts. (Uncanny X-Men #362)
The Continuing Saga of Gambit & the Gassy Lady. (Uncanny X-Men #362)
Storm and Marrow have their best conversations while fucking up automobiles. (Uncanny X-Men #362)
*Driving rock intro* (Uncanny X-Men #362)
Gassy ladies, fire ladies… It hard to be Gambit. (Uncanny X-Men #362)
This version of Cerebro doesn’t require telepathy to use, but it does require a cute outfit. (Uncanny X-Men #362)
In medias swamp-rat. (X-Men #82)
He has agreed to take me / To the ice hotel from the magazine (X-Men #82)
Whoa indeed, Keanu. (X-Men #82)
You’ve all had that dream too, right? (X-Men #82)
Clockwise from top-left: blood, black bile, phlegm, yellow bile. (X-Men #82)
I have no idea what kind of metal band Cerebro fronts, but I would listen to them. (X-Men #82)
I miss Toad’s too-many-Liefeldian-teeth look, but this one’s pretty great. (Uncanny X-Men #363)
Maybe the post-Fall era of X-Men will finally explain what Wolverine smelled. (Uncanny X-Men #363)
Cerebro’s other outfit. (Uncanny X-Men #363)
What’s… what’s happening here?! (Uncanny X-Men #363)
Shoulda just complimented her classic fedora-‘n’-trenchcoat look. (Uncanny X-Men #363)
Meanwhile, in the margins of a Wolverine one-shot… (Uncanny X-Men #363)
Somewhat new, somewhat different. (Uncanny X-Men #363)
NEXT TIME: 2 Hunt 2 Xavier

439 – Fishfic

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In which we reach the beginning of an end; Jay totally forgot Gambit was there; we’re all living in the Mary Purcelliverse; the X-Men split the party; and we explore The Bay Area’s Bohemian Hotbed of Student Anarchy.

X-PLAINED:

  • Mary Purcell (sort of)
  • The re-defaulting of the X-Men
  • Uncanny X-Men #362-323
  • X-Men #82
  • Nebraska
  • Pyro (Saint John Allerdyce) and his endless illness
  • Legacy Virus variations
  • Going home again
  • Running back and forth in quarries
  • Marrow, who’s come a long way
  • The two forms of fire: skeleton monsters and sexy ladies
  • Cerebro (the evil one)
  • San Francisco and Tajikinistan
  • Asphalt ball pits
  • A topsy-turvy nonsensical impossible hell
  • Nina the Mannite
  • Desire, love, loss, and fear
  • Skulls and spines
  • The New (New) Brotherhood of Mutants
  • Cerebrites Alpha and Beta
  • A lost, smelly fish
  • Ambiguous art
  • Blood, sweat, and fears
  • Which mutants would cause the most chaos at holiday gatherings
  • Hopes for post-Fall society

NEXT EPISODE: 2 Hunt 2 Xavier

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 438 – The Man of Harsh Business

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The confident sneer of a man with a shillelagh. (Uncanny X-Men #361)
Wolverine, vigilante relationship counselor. (Uncanny X-Men #361)
A Juggernaut diminished. (Uncanny X-Men #361)
Dude’s got his flaws, but Gambit really knows how to make an entrance! (Uncanny X-Men #361)
Shadowcat and Gambit have met before, but never so close to whatever’s in Juggernaut’s pants. (Uncanny X-Men #361)
“I especially don’t want anyone to see my impressive collection of Jonathan Taylor Thomas calendars!” (Uncanny X-Men #361)
The X-Men have their best conversations while fighting ninjas or ninja equivalents. (Uncanny X-Men #361)
Jack of Queen of Hearts Death! (Uncanny X-Men #361)
Comedy gold. (X-Men #81)
I’ve missed this dynamic. (X-Men #81)
It’s so easy to follow the motion of this fight even through still images… Pay attention, every modern action director! (X-Men #81)
The three words every woman longs to hear: “I hurrk hkk”. (X-Men #81)
Hairy hugs! (Wolverine: Black Rio)
THE MAN OF HARSH BUSINESS (Wolverine: Black Rio)
My only complaint with this panel is that the sound effect should actually be SHAAARK (Wolverine: Black Rio)
Logan knows how to party! (Wolverine: Black Rio)
Logan continues to know how to party! (Wolverine: Black Rio)
I have questions. (Wolverine: Black Rio)
To this, we can only say: huh. (Wolverine: Black Rio)
“Sorry I didn’t get here sooner. This thing has, like, a lot of zippers.” (Wolverine: Black Rio)
The road goes Wolver on and on. (Wolverine: Black Rio)
NEXT EPISODE: The Hunt for Xavier begins!

438 – The Man of Harsh Business

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In which Gambit knows how to make an entrance; Rogue and Gambit only have relationship conversations during superhero fights; Wolverine fights a shark; and we have opinions on how to handle certain aspects of backstory.

X-PLAINED:

  • One way to take over Madripoor
  • Uncanny X-Men #361
  • X-Men #81
  • Wolverine: Black Rio
  • The X-Men’s rapid slide back to the status quo
  • Steve Comicraft
  • The fork of loneliness
  • Cyttorak (again)
  • Black Tom Cassidy (again)
  • Peacocks
  • Sarasota Jungle Gardens
  • What’s sticking out of Juggernaut’s pants
  • Favorite versions of the Danger Room
  • Floriography
  • Kali (kind of)
  • Mary Purcell (a bit)
  • Rio Carnival
  • An outfit
  • Detective Antonio Vargas and his mustache
  • Saint Cyrus Leviticus
  • Ezra
  • Comparing mutant and Inhuman culture
  • Demonic homage

NEXT EPISODE: The Hunt for Xavier begins!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!