Hellfire Club – Page 5 – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

117 – How to Pee Like a Supervillain

July 17, 2016 Jay 36 comments

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which Gossamyr definitely probably doesn’t get blown up; we engage in a long and surprisingly canon-based exploration of Hellfire Club bathroom etiquette; the New Mutants break up with Magneto; you should probably never go swimming in the Marvel Universe; and it is possible (but unlikely) that Jay yells “IMPERIUS REX” more than is strictly necessary.

X-PLAINED

New Son/New Sun
Post-Inferno New Mutants
New Mutants #74-76
Babies
Ship shipping
Inanimate objects Warlock has attempted to befriend
Hellfire Club bathroom etiquette
A long-anticipated showdown
Magneto’s on-again-off-again children
The Mutant Wars
The Grey King (but not The Grey King)
Undersea creatures that have no business near New York
An Atlantean artificat of dubious provenance
How to deter a giant and possibly supernatural octopus
Recycled powers
Friendly sentinels

NOTE: The Dispossessed is in fact by Ursula K. Le Guin.

NEXT EPISODE: Trolls!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes, Google Play, or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 115 – So Many Teeth

June 26, 2016 Jay 6 comments

Listen to the podcast here.

No gallery this week–instead, Max put together a visual addendum covering stuff we talked about while watching but forgot to mention in the episode:

LINKS & FURTHER READING:

115 – So Many Teeth (feat. Max Carleton)

June 26, 2016 Jay 12 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which Jay and Max brave the X-Men anime; the problem isn’t in Wolverine’s pants; Xavier is for once less villainous than he seems; Emma Frost gets ruffly; Cyclops wasn’t even supposed to be here today; and we both really want to hang out with Scott Porter.

X-PLAINED:

Billy Kaplan and Tommy Shepherd
Waiting for the Trade
The X-Men Anime
Marvel Anime
Scott Porter
Jay’s ongoing attempts to assemble a coherent X-Men/Speed Racer conspiracy theory
Floating Hands Theater Wolverine
An unlikely T.A.
Several recurring flashbacks
The U-Men
The other U-Men
Armor (Hisako Ichiki)
Emma Frost, but ruffly
Evil Moira MacTaggert (Yui Sasaki)
The Sasaki Institute
The other Inner Circle
Marsh
Rat
Neuron
Takeo Sasaki
Potluck night at the Hellfire Club
Living vs. dead Jean Grey

NEXT EPISODE: Jubilee!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes, Google Play, or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 107 – Fairy Tale Ending

May 1, 2016 Jay 4 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

He’s not wrong; he’s just an asshole. (New Mutants #71)

Aw, kiddo. (New Mutants #71)

There’s a lot of more overtly awful stuff S’ym has done, but very little of it gets under my skin as badly as this scene. (New Mutants #71)

Brett Blevins’ Inferno might be the best Inferno. (New Mutants #71)

WELL, THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY. (New Mutants #71)

N’astirh Guy(TM) (New Mutants #71)

Nothing that begins with this line ever ends well. (New Mutants #71)

Okay. This looks bad. (New Mutants #71)

On its own, this is a perfectly serviceable cover; but it’s also a subtle and pretty brutal nod to the last issue of the Magik miniseries. (New Mutants #72)

Possibly the most metal title page to ever appear in an X-book. (New Mutants #72)

Calling it: Blevins’s is my hands-down favorite take on Inferno-infested New York. (New Mutants #72)

GAH. (New Mutants #72)

And now, a brief and delightful respite from the tragedy playing out in the A plot. (New Mutants #72)

Savor this moment: it’s not often you get to see New Mutants making a responsible choice! (New Mutants #72)

WELL, THEN. (New Mutants #72)

N’astirh levels up… (New Mutants #72)

…But so does Illyana. (New Mutants #72)

Death of Supergirl homage cover. Take a drink. (New Mutants #73)

T-O S’ym is so creepy, y’all. (New Mutants #73)

THERE ARE NOT ADEQUATE WORDS FOR HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS PAGE. (New Mutants #73)

That Colossus makes room in his rather minimal uniform for a photo wallet is kind of adorable an very much in character. (New Mutants #73)

“And that’s what you get for teaching new math!” (New Mutants #73)

We didn’t think of this until after the episode was recorded, but Illyana’s final armored form bears a lot of resemblance to her brother’s. (New Mutants #73)

This dude is pretty great. (New Mutants #73)

The Darkchilde in her final form. (New Mutants #73)

And so it ends… (New Mutants #73)

…or does it? (New Mutants #73)

“Or stick around in the background and then die of the Legacy Virus and come back like 20 years later without a soul. The point is, you’ve got options.” (New Mutants #73)

NEXT WEEK: The rise of the Goblin Queen.

LINKS AND FURTHER LISTENING:

We discussed the Magik miniseries in Episode 19 – Acorns and Swords.

107 – Fairy Tale Ending

May 1, 2016 Jay 39 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which everyone’s got Inferno issues; Brett Blevins makes it work; Belasco is conspicuously absent from Inferno; you should never go into Hell barefoot; the greatest X-Men stories are about loss; and Illyana Rasputin finally gets a fairy tale ending.

X-PLAINED

Tempus (Eva Bell)
Storm and Illyana: Magik #1-4 (briefly)
The two major Inferno plotlines
New Mutants #71-73
The best of Brett Blevins
The rise and fall of Magik
The ethics of time-travel interventions
A weaponized retcon
N’astirh Guy™
A chair that is also a moral event horizon
A significant soul-armor upgrade
Several variations on a chapter title
Possessed New York
An overly complex conspiracy theory
A bittersweet reunion
The Kobayashi Maru scenario as applied to X-Men
An even more bittersweet victory (of sorts)
The eventual return of Magik (sort of)
Why it’s really irresponsible to affiliate your school with a superhero team
Our favorite versions of Wolfsbane’s transitional form

NEXT WEEK:

The Rise of the Goblin Queen!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes, Google Play, or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 87 – It’s Always Darkest…

December 14, 2015 Jay 2 comments

Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

Don’t get too attached to these guys. (New Mutants #59)

Roll for initiative! (New Mutants #59)

Lookit this E.C. lookin’ jerk! (New Mutants #59)

Truth. (New Mutants #59)

Seriously, the Ani-mator is so creepy. (New Mutants #60)

Or you could just–you know what? Never mind. Forget it. Freakin’ teenagers. (New Mutants #60)

And that’s why you always leave a note. (New Mutants #60)

Oh, THAT guy. (New Mutants #60)

How many times has he done this so far? Two? Three? (New Mutants #60)

Well, fuck. (New Mutants #60)

Well, fuck. (New Mutants #60)

Later, she justifies this by saying that it’s what Doug would have wanted, which seems questionable. (New Mutants #60)

Meanwhile, in the other 2/3 of the event… (New Mutants #61)

Even horses, Warlock. (New Mutants #61)

Aw, man. These kids. (New Mutants #61)

Aw, man. These kids. (New Mutants #61)

It really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really sucks to be New Mutants-era Magneto. (New Mutants #61)

And to add insult to injury, somehow the graduation costumes got even worse. (New Mutants #61)

NEXT WEEK: The Fall of the Mutants concludes with X-Factor!

87 – It’s Always Darkest… (Fall of the Mutants, Part 2 of 3)

December 14, 2015 Jay 24 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which the New Mutants learn that they are not, in fact, immortal; Louise Simonson finds her stride; the Ani-Mator makes Cameron Hodge look downright reasonable; hating humans is Magneto’s security blanket; Doug Ramsey dies; and we continue our coverage of the Fall of the Mutants.

X-PLAINED:

Sugar Man
New Mutants #59-61
Bird Brain
The Ani-Mator
The Ani-Mates
Stylistic whiplash
Why you always leave a note
The death of Doug Ramsey
Black Condor’s amazing origin story
Interpersonal dynamics in New Mutants
Parsing ongoing series
Why Doug died
616 characters we’d trade for their Battleworld counterparts
Storytelling trends and the decline of though balloons

NEXT WEEK: …Just Before Dawn

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 71 – The Once and Fuchsia King

August 24, 2015 Jay 4 comments

Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 8/30/2015 at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

Spoiler: They will be back next issue. (New Mutants #51)

“If they’d learned anything from me, they’d be faking their own deaths!” (New Mutants #51)

DRAMA! (New Mutants #51)

No, the OTHER Plan Omega. (New Mutants #51)

Kevin Nowlan draws a rad Hepzibah. (New Mutants #51)

PROFESSOR XAVIER IS A JERK. (New Mutants #51)

“Well, I should probably see what the study group thinks, but I’m thinking fuchsia.” (New Mutants #51)

Sebastian Shaw takes dress codes seriously. (New Mutants #51)

She even LOOKS like she stepped off a power metal album cover. (New Mutants #52)

HE’S NOT WRONG. (New Mutants #52)

Aw, kiddo. (New Mutants #52)

Fighting xenomorphs, from the look of it. (New Mutants #52)

Love the body language on this page. (New Mutants #52)

We keep saying that this whole era feels like an inexorable escalation toward Inferno, and, yeah. That. (New Mutants #52)

I was gonna make a “subtext: not just for the ladies” joke, but I’m pretty sure it’s just text at this point. (New Mutants #53)

Aw, man. (New Mutants #53)

TWIST! Don’t worry, this’ll come back up eventually. (New Mutants #53)

“…But can you take them anywhere?” Spoiler: NO. No, you can’t. (New Mutants #53)

Magik intimidating Empath is the gift that keeps on giving. (New Mutants #53)

Make good choices, Cypher! (New Mutants #53)

Or, y’know, not. (New Mutants #53)

Sam Guthrie: Everyone’s best big brother. (New Mutants #54)

“I love you, but I have to leave the team because your costumes are SO BAD.” (New Mutants #54)

SO, THAT HAPPENED. (New Mutants #54)

Has anyone else noticed that Doug’s superhero career is basically a series of dress rehearsals for his eventual death. (New Mutants #54)

I genuinely can’t tell if this is a good burn or not: on one hand, the New Mutants’ costumes are objectively way worse; but on the other hand, the Hellions’ costumes are way more circus-y. (New Mutants #54)

NEXT WEEK: It’s hard to be Havok.

LINKS:

If you’re curious about the Starjammers, go listen to Episode 7 – Cyclops Has a Good Day, in which we discuss them at length with Greg Rucka.
The podcast where two dudes watch and review Grown Ups 2 every week is an actual, real thing, which you can listen to here.

71 – The Once and Fuchsia King

August 24, 2015 Jay 24 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

In which the New Mutants return from space; Professor Xavier ruins everything; Magneto is the Craig Pelton of X-Men; Cypher carouses shamefully with Hellfire tramps; Karma quits the team; and we wrap up Chris Claremont’s New Mutants run.

X-PLAINED:

Leong and Nga Coy Manh
New Mutants #51-54
The Starjammers (again)
The paradox of Professor X
Several dramatic speeches
The Hellfire Club for Creative Anachronism
Plan Omega (but not that one)
A fairly epic dress-code violation
Magik vs. Limbo
A very specific bit of fancasting
Best Magneto
What X-fans (may or may not) live for
A well-wrought nightmare
Hellion disambiguation
Doug Ramsey’s Fancy Hair
New Mutants X Frank Zappa
Wacky teen hijinks at the Hellfire Club
Carousing shamefully with Hellfire tramps
A heroic challenge
A counterintuitive heart’s desire
Claremont’s New Mutants run.
Libraries
Emma Frost’s accent
The sounds of blastin’

NEXT WEEK: It’s hard to be Havok.

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 60 – Rachel Summers and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

June 8, 2015 Jay 4 comments

Listen to the podcast here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 6/14/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.

The last thing you see before you die. (Uncanny X-Men #206)

Do you ‘ship Storm and Bree Morrell now? You probably should. (Uncanny X-Men #206)

The outfits in this arc are just 100% amazing. (Uncanny X-Men #206)

Damnit, Rachel. This is why we can’t have nice things. (Uncanny X-Men #206)

“Teamwork! Our only weakness!” (Uncanny X-Men #206)

“It’s Madelyne! They’ve shot her! And dyed her hair! And given her fairly extensive cosmetic surgery!” (Uncanny X-Men #206)

Wolverine hates Arizona. (Uncanny X-Men #207)

We were going to make up a drinking game based around how many times Wolverine really or metaphorically kills Rachel in this story, but you would die of alcohol poisoning by the end of the first issue. (Uncanny X-Men #207)