Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: Nathaniel Essex

As Mentioned in Episode 210 – The End of Tomorrow

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
What Rogue’s wearing was actually our school uniform back in 1992! (Uncanny X-Men #294)
Scott, you chowderhead. (Uncanny X-Men #294)
Do NOT invite Caliban to your wedding. Or probably to anything. (Uncanny X-Men #294)
You know, sometimes Professor Xavier really isn’t a jerk. (Uncanny X-Men #294)
Professor Xavier is shot in the dark future of Earth-811… (New Mutants #18)
…and in the dark present of Earth-616. (Uncanny X-Men #294)
Kids, your day is not going to get better from here. (Uncanny X-Men #294)
Have we mentioned we love Jae Lee’s art? We love Jae Lee’s art. (X-Factor #84)
At karaoke, Archangel’s voice is just okay, but his performance is 10/10. (X-Factor #84)
I mean, let’s be real – that’s pretty hot. (X-Factor #84)
EVERYBODY FIGHTS EVERYBODY (X-Factor #84)
The X-Men are so good at posing in this era. (X-Factor #84)
“Dear diary: I finally said it! I said the line!” (X-Factor #84)
Man, Andy Kubert could draw someone doing their taxes and it’d look superheroic. (X-Men #14)
Except that time 16 years later when you shoot him in the head, ya doof. (X-Men #14)
Jean Grey: CGC 8.4 Scott Summers: CGC 7.2 (X-Men #14)
Not Rictor’s best pickup line… But also not his worst. (X-Men #14)
Apocalypse, you have got to turn your shower temperature down. That hot water is awful for your skin. (X-Men #14)
That’s a clove cigarette, in case you can’t tell. (X-Men #14)
X-Force: both very sympathetic and very colorful! I miss when badasses wore colors other than black. (X-Force #16)
EVERYBODY FIGHTS EVERYBODY SOME MORE (X-Force #16)
“You see, Piotr, this is how we entered every building back in our X-Factor days!” (X-Force #16)
Mister Sinister: pleased as punch. (X-Force #16)
There’s seriously nothing we can add to this. (X-Force #16)
Best not to dwell. (X-Force #16)
NEXT EPISODE: It is definitely not.

LINKS & FURTHER ADVENTURES:

210 – The End of Tomorrow: X-Cutioner’s Song (Part 1 of 3)

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which you may or may not have your own Black Bug Room; FlameCon was in fact every bit as wonderful as we projected (and more); Caliban hates true love; no one will ever be as extra as Mister Sinister; X-Cutioner’s Song is secretly a farce; we achieve Peak Cable; and the quintessential ’90s crossover event begins!

X-PLAINED:

  • The Black Bug Room
  • A good deal of pre-event status quo
  • Uncanny X-Men #294
  • X-Factor #84
  • X-Men #14
  • X-Force #16
  • Trading card taxonomy
  • The opening strains of a crossover event
  • A concert that worked out better in theory than in practice
  • An abduction
  • Several attempted murders
  • A large number of awkward reunions
  • An even larger number of inter-team brawls
  • Two villains pretending to be other villains
  • Cape logistics
  • Peak Cable
  • Many pouches
  • Many guns
  • The origin of Hope Summers
  • Our hopes for mutants in the MCU

NEXT EPISODE: Aw, Stryfe, no.

NOTE: At one point in this episode, Miles said “X-Force” when he actually meant “X-Factor.” If you can tell us where, you win the prize of eternal smugness (not as much smugness as Sinister, but still a lot).

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 112 – Embers of Inferno (feat. Sam Humphries)

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Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
“So, y’know–business as usual.” (Amazing Spider-Man #313)
The Ghostbusters references just keep coming! (Amazing Spider-Man #313)
HE’S NOT WRONG. (Peter Parker: The Spectacular Spider-Man #146)
This is in fact literally what it is like to work in publishing, all the time. (Peter Parker: The Spectacular Spider-Man #147)
CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW JARVIS’S MOM IS A HUGE WRESTLING AFICIONADO? (Avengers #298)
Well, then. (Avengers #298)
He does this every time he fights a possessed machine. (Avengers #298)
No, seriously. Every time. (Avengers #299)
Stories involving Nanny and the Orphanmaker are never not super sad and messed up. (Avengers #299)
That one time the Avengers got back together in a tie-in to someone else’s crossover event. (Avengers #300)
Never leave your house. Seriously. (Power Pack #42)
Actually, no. Your house isn’t safe, either. (Power Pack #42)
And then a group of young children looked back nostalgically at the time they fought Sabretooth in a sewer. (Power Pack #44)
Aw. (Power Pack #44)
LIES. (The Mutant Misadventures of Cloak and Dagger #4)
For full effect, you have to imagine the narration being read by David Attenborough. (Daredevil #262)
And that was how Daredevil beat up a vacuum cleaner. (Daredevil #262)
It’s actually pretty surprising that no one else thought to do anything with possessed hospital equipment, because that is TERRIFYING. (Daredevil #263)
Officer Drillbit, in all his glory. (Daredevil #265)
For 1989 Daredevil, this ending is positively chipper. (Daredevil #265)
NEXT EPISODE: So. Much. Wolverine.

112 – Embers of Inferno (feat. Sam Humphries)

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which we cover (almost) all of the Inferno tie-ins with the help of writer Sam Humphries; the Marvel Universe used to be really X-Centric; Jarvis is unstoppable; Daredevil fights a vacuum cleaner; it’s probably best not to ask about the whole Celestial Madonna thing; Power Pack gets incredibly upsetting; working in comics makes you appreciate crossovers on a whole new level; and we’d all really have liked to have seen Guy Davis’s Inferno.

X-PLAINED:

  • Peter Quill’s brief music career
  • Widget
  • The Amazing Spider-Man #311-313
  • Spectacular Spider-Man #146-148
  • Web of Spider-Man #47-48
  • Avengers #298-300
  • Power Pack #42-44
  • Daredevil #262, 263, 265
  • Cloak and Dagger (vol. 3) #4
  • Fantastic Four #322-324
  • Inferno, as a whole
  • The fate of Madelyne Pryor
  • Jay’s Madelyne Pryor song
  • How working in comics taught us to appreciate crossovers
  • Our ideal Inferno artists

NEXT EPISODE: So. Much. Wolverine.

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes, Google Play, or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 102 – Baby Race 2000

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Okay, then. (X-Factor #32)
I wanna hang out there. (X-Factor #32)
Please note that Boom Boom pauses to put on sunglasses before doing cool cool stuff. Boom Boom knows what’s up. (X-Factor #32)
MVP. (X-Factor #32)
Well, that’s certainly one way to do that. (X-Factor #33)
In Boom Boom’s defense, shopping is terrible. (X-Factor #33)
Go set something on fire for justice, kiddo! (X-Factor #33)
BEAST! We missed you! (X-Factor #33)
Y’know, most people would just send a C&D. (X-Factor #33)
Kinda answered your own question, there, buddy. (X-Factor #34)
Nanny and the Orphan-Maker walk the line between sad and terrifying SO beautifully. (X-Factor #34)
N’astirh got no time for your rationalizations, Hodge. (X-Factor #34)
Later, he’s going to go home and listen to Stabbing Westward in the dark. (X-Factor #34)
Aw. (X-Factor #34)
It’s okay. He’ll be back. (X-Factor #34)
Yes, Warren, we get it. (X-Factor #34)
Welcome to the State Home for Gaslighting. Hope you survive the… (X-Factor #35)
Worst. Orphanage. Ever. (X-Factor #35)
GAH. There is literally nothing in this issue that is not wildly unsettling. (X-Factor #35)
The orphanage is a metaphor that is also a real fictional orphanage. (X-Factor #35)
‘Kay. (X-Factor #35)
Sometimes you gotta prioritize. (X-Factor #35)
NEXT WEEK: Excalibur goes ongoing!

102 – Baby Race 2000

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which Beast’s DNA is basically held together with spit and baling wire; Boom Boom wins MVP; Angel goes full goth; Cameron Hodge loses his head; Cyclops is basically a Silent Hill protagonist; and the Nebraska Department of Social Services is probably not adequately equipped to deal with Mister Sinister.

X-PLAINED:

  • The Horsemen of Death
  • X-Factor #32-35
  • Xartans
  • Superheroic triage
  • A vague prophecy
  • Fake Avengers
  • Fake-band disambiguation
  • KiLLeR DWaRfS
  • Crippled Puppies
  • Audiophile Apocalypse
  • Shopping
  • Dubiously zealous trademark protection
  • Acronym disambiguation
  • The death of Candy Southern
  • The not-exactly death of Cameron Hodge
  • Nanny
  • Orphan-Maker
  • Baby Race 2000
  • An orphanage that is also a metaphor
  • Unreliable narration
  • The dubious partnership of Mister Sinister and Apocalypse
  • Best iterations of Boom Boom

NEXT EPISODE: Excalibur goes ongoing!

InfernoWatch

  • Malicious inanimate objects
  • Early signs of Marvel Girl’s returning telepathy
  • First clues of Cyclops’s connection to Sinister
  • First mention of Goblin Queen by name

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Hang out with us on Imzy!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 66 – The Mutant Massacre, Part 2

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Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/26/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
If this week’s illustration reminds you of last week’s, that’s because they’re two parts of this rad panorama! Again, prints are available until 7/26/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
Mystique, what are you even doing? (X-Factor #9)
This, again. (X-Factor #9)
Passing privilege in action! (X-Factor #9)
That’s actually pretty clever. (X-Factor #9)
MOPPETS. (X-Factor #9)
Meanwhile in Apartment 3G… (X-Factor #10)
WRONG CHOICE, ANGEL. (X-Factor #10)
One horseman down, three to go. (X-Factor #10)
Damn, Jean. (X-Factor #10)
Ouch. (X-Factor #10)
OUCH. (X-Factor #10)
There is never a worst time to be a Power kid than during an X-line crossover. (Power Pack #27)
Everyone hates X-Factor. (Power Pack #27)
It really does kind of cheapen Sabretooth’s menace when a bunch of kids can take him down–even these kids. (Power Pack #27)
COMICS FOR KIDS. (Power Pack #27)
And then everything was sad forever. (Power Pack #27)
BEHOLD THIS MAJESTIC THUNDER GOD AND HIS MAJESTIC BEARD! (The Mighty Thor #373)
No, but seriously, though. (The Mighty Thor #373)
Thor has frog friends. (The Mighty Thor #373)
Have we mentioned that we love Thor? We love Thor. (The Mighty Thor #373)
There’s a reason that Walter Simonson is the gold standard for epic dialogue. (The Mighty Thor #374)
Aw. (The Mighty Thor #374)
There’s a lot of straight-up killing on the hero side of this event. (The Mighty Thor #374)
(X-Men #9, specifically.) (The Mighty Thor #374)
Thor: Definitely the best dude you know. (The Mighty Thor #374)
It’s funny, because miscommunication. (X-Factor #11)
“Run! It’s a crossover issue!” (X-Factor #11)
X-Factor drinking game: Drink every time someone has to explain the relationship between X-Factor and the X-Terminators. (X-Factor #11)
Halfway there, Apocalypse! (X-Factor #11)
Ouch. (X-Factor #11)
On the upside: Boom-Boom! (X-Factor #11)
NEXT WEEK: The New Mutants party like it’s 1299!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

  • Listen to Episode 65–The Mutant Massacre, Part 1–here!
  • You can find the Mutant Massacre reading order here.
  • Have you read Walter Simonson’s run of The Mighty Thor yet? You should really go do that. It starts here.

66 – The Mutant Massacre, Part 2

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/26/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/26/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.

In which we wrap up our first official two-parter; Gambit ruins everything; Rachel has a theory about Mister Sinister; Marvel communication technology is behind the times; Trish Tilby is tired of your bullshit; Walter Simonson is the best of the best; X-Factor pulls it together; Power Pack gets uncomfortably dark; Miles has Thor feelings; and even more mutants die.

NOTE: This episode is the second of a two-parter! If you haven’t listened to Episode 65, where we cover the first half of the mutant massacre, you should probably do that before you listen to this one!

X-PLAINED:

  • Masque
  • Tentacle disambiguation
  • More of the Mutant Massacre
  • A Sinister hypothesis
  • Several Marauder-related retcons
  • X-Factor #9-11
  • Power Pack #27
  • The Mighty Thor #373-374
  • Trish Tilby
  • Artie & Leech
  • Several awkward reunions
  • Walter Simonson
  • The fall of Angel
  • Apocalypse’s horsemen
  • Yet another crossover that will probably scar the Power kids for life
  • Franklin Richards
  • Thor, Donald Blake, and Sigurd Jarlson
  • The best issue of any comic, ever.
  • The Tunnelers
  • Ongoing repercussions of the Mutant Massacre
  • Rachel & Miles’s horseman identities
  • Which X-Men could and should wield Mjolnir

NEXT WEEK: The New Mutants party like it’s 1299!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 65 – The Mutant Massacre, Part 1

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Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/19/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
And so it begins. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
Dazzler vs. Dazzler. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
We’d make a joke about taking a drink for every X-Men/X-Factor near miss, but you’d die of alcohol poisoning before the end of the crossover. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
Aw, Colossus. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
Not sure why Alanis Morisette didn’t bring this up in “Ironic.” (Uncanny X-Men #210)
Good job Kitty. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
Well, damn. (Uncanny X-Men #210)
There’s something really unsettlingly cheery and Silver-Age about this page. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
No idea who the purple individual is, which is a shame, because they seem awesome. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
STORM, NO! DON’T SPLIT THE PARTY! (Uncanny X-Men #211)
Whoa. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
This is the closest they’ll come to an actual conversation until Inferno. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
Whoops. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
So, THAT happened. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
SO, THAT HAPPENED. (Uncanny X-Men #211)
Dani Moonstar’s powers are METAL AS FUCK. (New Mutants #46)
“My powers are limited to the counterculture.” (New Mutants #46)
Powerlessness and the sense of being able to accomplish too little too late are pervasive themes in the Mutant Massacre. (New Mutants #46)
Everything’s sadder when teenagers are reacting to it. (New Mutants #46)
Well, shit. (New Mutants #46)
How have they not learned to listen to Doug by now? He is ALWAYS RIGHT. (New Mutants #46)
Cold, Wolverine. (Uncanny X-Men #212)
In her defense, everything is in fact well and truly fucked. (Uncanny X-Men #212)
And again. See what I meant about the alcohol-poisoning thing? (Uncanny X-Men #212)
You can, however, take a drink when Storm takes off her clothes for no clear reason. (Uncanny X-Men #212)
First mention of the man with the plan! (Uncanny X-Men #212)
Well done, Wolverine! (Uncanny X-Men #212)
I don’t care who you are: Callisto is better at leadership than you. (Uncanny X-Men #212)
It’s cool. It’s just Thor; we’ll be covering that stuff next episode. (Uncanny X-Men #212)
Psylocke’s psychic projection is adorable and also super creepy. (Uncanny X-Men #213)
NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE (Uncanny X-Men #213)
Betsy Braddock is hardcore. (Uncanny X-Men #213)
Two classic Claremontisms… (Uncanny X-Men #213)
…on a single page. (Uncanny X-Men #213)
Damn, Psylocke. (Uncanny X-Men #213)
How much do we love Psylocke’s totally femme-princess superhero costume? SO MUCH. (Uncanny X-Men #213)
Next Week: The Mutant Massacre, Part 2!

If you want to follow along with the crossover, you can find a guide to the reading order–and how we’re dividing it between episodes–here.

 

65 – The Mutant Massacre, Part 1

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/19/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/19/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.

In which we hit the first big X-centric crossover; a lot of Morlocks die; X-Factor is a dark farce; Kitty Pryde talks down a mob without using racial slurs; when Doug Ramsey tells you there’s a problem, you listen; and Callisto should be one of the iconic leaders of the Marvel Universe.

X-PLAINED:

  • Death by intellectual-property dispute
  • The Mutant Massacre
  • Mutant Massacres that might have been
  • Uncanny X-Men #210-213
  • New Mutants #46
  • The Marauders
  • The best way to guarantee the New Mutants’ involvement in a storyline
  • Limbo fashion
  • The responsibility of leadership
  • Wolverine vs. Sabretooth
  • Psylocke vs. Sabretooth
  • The evolution of crossovers
  • Characters we’d like to see more of post-Secret Wars

NEXT WEEK: The Mutant Massacre, Part 2!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!