Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

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As Mentioned in Episode 329 – Scheming and Argument

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Same cover, different week. (Excalibur #94)
Rahne “Aleph from Global Frequency” Sinclair. (Excalibur #94)
Sorry. I just can’t accept this as Tangerine. (Excalibur #94)
He could totally have rocked the swim cap, though. (Excalibur #94)
Ew, they’re all goopy. (Excalibur #94)
Well, damn. (Excalibur #94)
We call that a “Muir Hello.” (X-Man #12)
It also goes PING! (X-Man #12)
Okay: That is legitimately cool. (X-Man #12)
The actual tagline of Squeezits(TM) was “Squeeze the fun out of it.” I swear to g-d I’m not making this up. (X-Man #12)
Look at those mid ’90s computer graphics! (Excalibur #95)
Moira doesn’t give a fuck if she’s not your real mom; she’s grounding you anyway. (Excalibur #95)
Oh, Rory. Buddy. (Excalibur #95)
This is also roughly how it feels to read like 20 years of X-Men in a sitting. (Excalibur #95)
What Excalibur’s thinking about. (Excalibur #95)
NEXT EPISODE: The herald of Onslaught; but also this fashion situation.

329 – Scheming and Argument

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Nate Grey has the soul of a man in a mesh shirt; Black Air is somehow even worse than you thought it was; Hulk does not want to be x-treme teen from alternate dimension; we are excited as hell for the upcoming Frasier/Ewing Gamma Flight; and Moira MacTaggert is (sometimes) the adult we need.

X-PLAINED:

  • Nate Grey’s (possible) demon zombie baby
  • What Excalibur’s been up to lately
  • Excalibur #94-95
  • X-Man #12
  • Yet another take on roughly the same dark future
  • Dark-future disambiguation
  • Bangs
  • The Black Wall
  • Leather vs. vinyl
  • Sentinels pooping sentinels
  • Nate Grey (more) (again)
  • Gamma Flight
  • Excessively silly diagnostic technology
  • Squeezits(TM)
  • A minor intervention
  • X-characters most likely to lead a successful book club
  • Warlock on Krakoa

NEXT EPISODE: The Herald of Onslaught (for real, this time, we promise)!

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As Mentioned in Episode 320 – The Accountability Wagon

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
I know the cover blurb isn’t actually foreshadowing, but the cover blurb is kiiiinda foreshadowing. (Excalibur #91)
There’s writing a phonetic accent… and then there’s writing someone making fun of someone else’s accent, phonetically. (Excalibur #91)
Aw. (Excalibur #91)
For your Twitter fight needs. (Excalibur #91)
This is roughly how I react to having to share personal information with colleagues, too. (Excalibur #91)
They’re good friends. (Excalibur #91)
THE SUBTITLES THO (Excalibur #91)
Creeeeeepy. (Excalibur #91)
I know his teeth are also supposed to be steel, but they look just off enough from the rest of his face that I can’t shake the idea that they’re normal teeth, which idea is profoundly and inexplicably unsettling. (Excalibur #92)
Huh. (Excalibur #92)
You sure did. (Excalibur #93)
[Music rises] (Excalibur #93)
Ah, Rahne. You’re such a good kid. (Excalibur #93)
FUCK YEAH RAHNE SINCLAIR! (Excalibur #93)
NEXT EPISODE: Same Sabretooth, different day.

320 – The Accountability Wagon

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which Pete Wisdom is the guy you love to glare at; Nightcrawler is right (and a delightfully complex individual); Colossus has a lot of issues; and Wolfsbane gets the confrontation we’ve been waiting for since the New Mutants graphic novel.

X-PLAINED:

  • Wolfsbane’s powers
  • Excalibur #91-93
  • The somewhat nebulous age of Kitty Pryde
  • Betrayal
  • What’s been up on Muir Isle
  • Organized sports, Excalibur-style
  • Pubs and what happens in them
  • Drinking with Excalibur
  • Shovel talks
  • Phonetic accents, redeemed
  • A fairly one-sided fight
  • Colossus’s issues (more) (again)
  • Anatomy and physiology of organic steel
  • Accountability, trauma, and their intersections
  • An exceptionally cathartic confrontation
  • A hoodie Jay desperately wants
  • Where cold opens come from
  • Whether and how Gambit passes for human

NEXT EPISODE: Same Sabretooth, different day

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 311 – Love Makes a Super Team

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
This friendship really never gets old. (X-Men Annual 1995)
Freakin’ Genesis, man. (X-Men Annual 1995)
The Nasty Boys, they are not. (X-Men Annual 1995)
Nathaniel Essex: The Hollywood Dracula Years. (X-Men Annual 1995)
The ladies love the cape. (X-Men Annual 1995)
In all fairness, I’m not sure I’d want to be naked in Teen Hank and Bobby’s makeouts cabin without cleaning first, either. (X-Men Annual 1995)
Meanwhile in the UK, a dramatic man and his dramatic ponytail! (X-Men Annual 1995)
I still think the photos were a bit much. (X-Men Annual 1995)
Anniversary or no, this image does not justify a double gatefold. (Uncanny X-Men #325)
Jean Grey: thirsty on main. (Uncanny X-Men #325)
Me, too, Monet. Me, too/ (Uncanny X-Men #325)
Damn, Piotr. (Uncanny X-Men #325)
“Non, mon ami, I do not have Prince Albert in a can.” (Uncanny X-Men #325)
Marrow may be bloodthirsty, but she’s also inclusive! (Uncanny X-Men #325)
What. (Uncanny X-Men #325)
Ew. (Uncanny X-Men #325)
This is why we can’t have nice things and/or organs. (Uncanny X-Men #325)
NEXT EPISODE: The Nobody People, with author Bob Proehl!

311 – Love Makes a Super-Team

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which we decide to stop recognizing the nominal difference between X-Men and Uncanny X-Men; time travel may or may not wait for you; Mister Sinister has probably appeared in at least one Ed Wood film; we are a pro-Tingle podcast; X-Men is about family; the Braddock twins catch up; Sailor Moon > Shinobi Shaw; Generation X is inducted into the baseball tradition; and Storm does what she does with Morlocks in sewers.

X-PLAINED:

  • Franklin Richards’ impressive lineage
  • 311
  • Yet another structure for annuals
  • X-Men Annual 1995
  • Uncanny X-Men #325
  • Serious academic discussions
  • Faye Livingstone
  • Mister Sinister’s Hollywood adventures
  • Tyler Dayspring / Tolliver / Genesis (again)
  • Teenage optimism
  • An absolutely nonsensical villainous plot
  • A Hank McCoy that might have been
  • Friendship
  • Fraternal correspondence
  • Romance
  • Morlocks
  • The first time Storm stabbed a Morlock leader in the heart
  • Gene Nation
  • A really excessive cover
  • An intergenerational baseball game
  • Another fairly nonsensical villainous plot
  • The second time Storm stabbed a Morlock leader in the heart
  • X-horror
  • Other media X-fans may enjoy reading, playing, or watching

NEXT EPISODE: Bob Proehl X-Plains the Resonant Duology!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 300 – Götterdämmerung

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Trust us–it looks better on foil. (X-Men: Omega)
Those skulls can’t be stable. (X-Men: Omega)
The gang’s mostly here! (X-Men: Omega)
[Cries in Dark Phoenix Saga] (X-Men: Omega)
Truly, he has been preparing for this moment for his entire life.
It’s cute how Nate assumes that it’s possible to talk Magneto out of fighting anybody, ever. (X-Men: Omega)
I’d like to imagine that the M’Kraan crystal made the conscious choice not to show her Onslaught. (X-Men: Omega)
YES! (X-Men: Omega)
Just, um, imagine that he’s holding a gun and also using his powers out of… enthusiasm? For the gun? I guess? (X-Men: Omega)
“Wait, are you the angry Claremontean narrator?!” (X-Men: Omega)
It’s okay. He’ll be back in about 14 years. (X-Men: Omega)
Nobody expects an ongoing series! (X-Men: Omega)
And that, as they say, is that. (X-Men: Omega)
NEXT EPISODE: Back in the 616!

LINKS & FURTHER EPICS:

300 – Götterdämmerung

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which the Age of Apocalypse comes to an end; Angel briefly lives up to his potential; Bishop was sometimes right; It’s not a climactic ending without an X-Men #137 reference; Colossus breaks our hearts; X-Men: Marvels Snapshot will be out in September; and somehow we have made 300 of these things.

X-PLAINED:

  • Beast vs. Dark Beast
  • X-Men: Omega
  • The entirety of the (first) Age of Apocalypse
  • Potpourri vs. incense
  • Dramatic hair
  • Many, many errors
  • Unforeseen consequences
  • A long-anticipated team-up
  • Many deaths
  • Art as artifact
  • Narration that has haunted Jay for 20 years
  • One of the more persistent deaths of David Haller
  • Blast Attack
  • The end of a world
  • Refugees from the Age of Apocalypse
  • Our favorite X-milestone issues
  • Theoretical teams
  • Orphans
  • When X-Men: Marvels Snapshot is actually coming out
  • Our favorite show bits
  • How Jay’s chickens-in-law are doing

NEXT EPISODE: X-Men Prime

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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As Mentioned in Episode 293 – The Monster Under the World

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!
Almost as cool as the way the backgrounds of the Marvel Universe Series 3 trading cards can be laid out as two giant space-pictures.
Husk, you’ve changed! And Chamber, you… have a face! (Generation Next #1)
Red and yellow outfit, banded metal skin, muscles on muscles, utterly broken by the world… I guess Earth-295 isn’t that different. (Generation Next #1)
We’ve seen Kitty bully younger mutants before… just usually not with as much stabbing. (Generation Next #1)
“I mean, we don’t want them to be inexperienced at dying, do we?” (Generation Next #1)
Know-It-All is pretty sure the depiction of technology in Hackers is way too bland and boring. (Generation Next #1)
Drums. Drums in the deep. (Generation Next #2)
Do minibuses look like that? No. But should they? (Generation Next #2)
This was one of the weirder anti-smoking PSAs of the 90s. (Generation Next #2)
Quietus is troubling. (Generation Next #2)
Paige has a zero-tolerance policy for Monty Python references. (Generation Next #2)
Only Chris Bachalo could make relatively normal people and monsters like that look at home in the same panel. (Generation Next #3)
“Like, the spiritual concept, not like Xi’an from New Muta… You know what, never mind.” (Generation Next #3)
Weirdly, I’ve had this exact same dream. (Generation Next #3)
Meanwhile, everything is terrible. (Generation Next #3)
YIP! (Generation Next #3)
Enclosed V Exposed: Dawn of Panel Layouts (Generation Next #4)
And then Sugar Man ate through his own mangled corpse and burrowed into the next scene. As one does. (Generation Next #4)
noooooo (Generation Next #4)
NOOOOOOOO (Generation Next #4)
Not to downplay the effectiveness of SPLOT SPLANG BONK THOPP, but it’s those irregular, sharp panel borders that really sell the impact. (Generation Next #4)
It all happens so quickly. (Generation Next #4)
And I’ll remember those panels for the rest of my life. (Generation Next #4)
Ever. (Generation Next #4)
NEXT EPISODE: Happy Mother’s Day!

293 – The Monster Under the World

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Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

In which not all Mondos are created equal; the kids are only rarely all right; the Age of Apocalypse is not Magneto’s fault; Sugar Man is the stuff of universal nightmares; “cartoonish” is not necessarily a plus; and the Age of Apocalypse is not particularly sustainable.

X-PLAINED:

  • Generation Next #1-4
  • The tradition of YA horror in X-books
  • Bachalo unchained
  • Whose fault the Age of Apocalypse is
  • Adaptive technology vs. Apocalypse
  • Chamber of Earth-295
  • Husk of Earth-295
  • Skin of Earth-295
  • Mondo of Earth-295
  • Vincente Cimetta
  • Know-It-All (Claudia)
  • An abysmal training exercise
  • Colossus of Earth-295
  • Shadowcat of Earth-295
  • Gardner Monroe (Flashback)
  • Quietus
  • Sugar Man
  • The Portland and/or Seattle Core
  • Illyana Rasputin
  • Ace
  • Human collaborators
  • A gratuitous Monty Python reference
  • The difference between mass and volume
  • Number Six
  • The fall of Generation Next
  • Growing up in the Age of Apocalypse
  • Illyana 2.0
  • Subtext vs. queerbaiting

NEXT EPISODE: X-Calibre!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!