As Mentioned – Page 28 – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

As Mentioned in Episode 156 – Genosha Strikes Back

April 23, 2017 Jay 6 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Contact David to purchase the original!

Just in case you’ve forgotten since last week! (Uncanny X-Men #271)

Here, have some New Mutants, while we’re at it. (Uncanny X-Men #271)

The Technicolor Knight Returns! (Uncanny X-Men #271)

When even Evil!Sexy Moira has better scientific ethics than you, you’ve got some thinking to do, Moreau. (Uncanny X-Men #271)

“I mean, I know I played a central role in subjugating an entire people and subjecting them to unspeakable horrors, but sometimes I felt kinda bad about it!” (Uncanny X-Men #271)

She’s not wrong, dude. (Uncanny X-Men #271)

Awk-ward. (Uncanny X-Men #271)

Ahhh, THERE it is! (Uncanny X-Men #271)

Spoiler: Nah. (Uncanny X-Men #271)

Liefeld kick! Take a drink! (New Mutants #96)

“Also can I draw on her face with a sharpie?” (New Mutants #96)

When threatened, the wild Jubilee will fan out her tail in a display meant to intimidate predators. (New Mutants #96)

Jean’s face, tho. “Ugh, AGAIN.” (X-Factor #61)

Because we never get tired of those dramatis personae pages. (X-Factor #61)

Bogdanove’s Hodge really is the best Hodge. (X-Factor #61)

I’m pretty sure this is the first hint we’ve gotten at Cable’s mutant powers. (Based on eventually-established continuity, he should be dying of the T-O virus right now, but that wouldn’t be written in until much later.) (X-Factor #61)

These nerds. (X-Factor #61)

I wonder what’s in Xavier’s telepathically-derived files! (X-Factor #61)

That Charles Xavier keeps detailed files on which of his students want to bang each other is the least surprising thing I’ve read in my life. (X-Factor #61)

“I mean, except for the chokehold part! (X-Factor #61)

NEXT EPISODE: Revenge of the return of the X-Men!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

“Politics and the English Language,” by George Orwell, is one of Jay’s favorite essays of all time.
Now you, too, can be robot Jean Valjean.
Here’s Elle Collins’s X-Men reboot pitch at the late, great Comics Alliance.

As Mentioned in Episode 155

April 16, 2017 Jay 8 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Contact David to purchase the original!

“I HATE THIS SHIRT!” (X-Men #270)

X-Men… (X-Men #270)

…and New Mutants. (Not pictured: X-Factor.) (X-Men #270)

Look, dude, I am PRETTY SURE they have schedules in the future and you’re just being a dick. (X-Men #270)

Strong Guy FTW! (X-Men #270)

The X-Men, summed up in a single perfect panel. (X-Men #270)

“It’s impossible! Unless there was an unscrupulous redhead, or I guess if he got bored…” (X-Men #270)

Fortunately, the Genoshans were able to outfit them with strategically placed shadows and thought balloons. (New Mutants #95)

THAT’S NOT REASSURING. (New Mutants #95)

My first kiss was basically exactly like this. (New Mutants #95)

Well, then. (New Mutants #95)

The weirdly anticlimactic death of Warlock. (New Mutants #95)

In the land of Genosha… and Manhattan… and some random airstrip… and, look, they use this basic plotline a lot. (X-Factor #60)

Ah, THAT’S the Hodge we know and love! (X-Factor #60)

“Son, do you have a license for that esoteric paraphernalia?” (X-Factor #60)

Boom Boom’s dad is a jerk. (X-Factor #60)

Awwww, they’re learning! (X-Factor #60)

You’d think they’d eventually wise up and get clothes resistant to their own and each other’s powers, but, no. (X-Factor #60)

This is just delightful. (X-Factor #60)

Scott, that’s not how you–you know what? Never mind. (X-Factor #60)

I know they hadn’t been retconned to be father and son yet, but this is some great accidental foreshadowing all the same. (X-Factor #60)

NEXT EPISODE: This asshole, again.

LINKS & FURTHER READING

For more on Miles’s upcoming project, Thor: The Lightning and the Storm, check out http://www.thelightningandthestorm.com!

As Mentioned in Episode 153 – Mermaid Parade

April 3, 2017 Jay Leave a comment

Listen to the podcast here.

Art by David Wynne. Contact David to purchase the original!

These two have their moments. (Excalibur #28)

Aw. (Excalibur #28)

“I’m Brian’s significantly more fashion-forward brother.” (Excalibur #28)

…’kay. (Excalibur #28)

Well, then. (Excalibur #28)

I don’t know what you do in fights, but… (Excalibur #28)

Man, these Sweet Valley High novels are getting weird. (Excalibur #28)

The Excalibur #29 wall of shame.

Not every day. Just, y’know, most days. (Excalibur #29)

HEY, KIDS! COMICS! (Excalibur #29)

I just. Wow. (Excalibur #29)

Okay, so, that’s a pretty cool layout.

NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE (Excalibur #29)

Breakfast with Excalibur is aggressively informal. (Excalibur #29)

Alysande “I knew I’d have been better off staying home and drinking” Stuart. (Excalibur #30)

Not mentioning W.H.O. here was kind of a waste. (Excalibur #30)

And then Captain Britain got his ass kicked by the elderly. (Excalibur #30)

Good dog. (Excalibur #30)

These delightful scamps! (Excalibur #30)

[Insert Second Coming joke here.] (Excalibur #31)

I really hope they never stop bringing that up, because it never stops being funny. (Excalibur #31)

Um. Can we… maybe not? (Excalibur #31)

LOOK AT THIS GOOFY TURTLE-LOOKING DUDE (Excalibur #31)

They’re about as effective as they look. (Excalibur #31)

NEXT EPISODE: Talking Iceman with Sina Grace!

As Mentioned in Episode 151 – Czars of Kung Fu

March 20, 2017 Jay 9 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Contact David to purchase the original!

WELL, THEN. (Uncanny X-Men #264)

“Also, we think they might be slightly evil.” (Uncanny X-Men #264)

Seriously, though, THEY ARE NEVER GOING TO MENTION THE TENTACLES AGAIN. (Uncanny X-Men #264)

But can it teach aerobics? I DON’T THINK SO. (Uncanny X-Men #264)

Wolverine WWII flashbacks are usually pretty fun. (Uncanny X-Men #268)

No, YOU ship it. (Uncanny X-Men #268)

Her hair is so great, though. (Uncanny X-Men #268)

How can one character be so awesome? It seems kind of unfair. (Uncanny X-Men #268)

Don’t fuck with Seraph. She’ll kick your ass and leave you with a blood debt to Viper. (Uncanny X-Men #268)

“Look, it was this or leather pants.” (Uncanny X-Men #268)

It’s fair to assume that whatever Jubilee is doing in the background is roughly a million times more entertaining than whatever’s going on in the A-plot. (Uncanny X-Men #268)

Jim Lee cocktail dresses, topped off with Jim Lee hair. (Uncanny X-Men #268)

It was REALLY HARD to not make this whole visual companion nothing but Jubilee. I hope you appreciate my restraint. (Uncanny X-Men #268)

Remember that time Cap made an awkward pass at Wolverine? (Uncanny X-Men #268)

Come for the broken spine; stay for spoiling the surprise twist! (And yet, somehow, we still love this cover.) (Uncanny X-Men #269)

If I had a dollar for every day I’ve woken up like this… (Uncanny X-Men #269)

In which Jim Lee does a pretty solid Barry Windsor Smith. (Uncanny X-Men #269)

“Now put on some damn pants and fight me!” (Uncanny X-Men #269)

“But you’re… you’re so evil! And sexy!” (Uncanny X-Men #269)

Well, that explains a thing or two. (Uncanny X-Men #269)

It’s really not the Savage Land without a sexy montage. (Uncanny X-Men #269)

Okay. This looks bad. (Uncanny X-Men #269)

It’s easy to make fun of this page, but at the same time, it’s really damn cool. (Uncanny X-Men #269)

Lila Cheney: falls into the heart of a sun, comes back more stylin’ than ever! (Uncanny X-Men #269)

NEXT EPISODE: Days of Future Present!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

As Mentioned in Episode 148 – That’s So Ravens

February 27, 2017 Miles 4 comments

Listen to the podcast here.

Bernard the Poet, you’ve changed! And we’re terrified! (X-Factor #54)

“Warren, be a good boy and you’ll get a prize after the appointment!” (X-Factor #54)

This image really shouldn’t work as well as it does. (X-Factor #54)

It’s a vampire dress! You know, for vampires! (X-Factor #54)

X-Factor in a single panel. (X-Factor #54)

Jeez, devouring people’s souls isn’t enough – you have to be all mean-girls about it too? (X-Factor #56)

The phrase ‘costume drama’ has never been quite so literal. (X-Factor #56)

Miles has never been hospitalized and is pretty sure this right here is just sort of how it goes. (X-Factor #56)

This is basically what that Azrael guy from 90s Batman was hoping to be, right? (X-Factor #56)

“We just got back from our aerobics class and didn’t have time to change. So, what’s up?” (X-Factor #56)

Suddenly, green guys! Nice work, Andy Kubert. (X-Factor #57)

I wish Crimson wore this costume more in this arc. (X-Factor #57)

Accidental bank robbery: one of Jay’s favorite tropes. Also, the whole mirror thing is drawn really nicely. (X-Factor #57)

WELL THAT’S LEGITIMATELY TERRIFYING (X-Factor #57)

“Illusion, Michael.” (X-Factor #57)

“Vampire dress, dilapidated theater, occult trappings – check. Let’s get this LARP night started!” (X-Factor #58)

Surprise, kid! Your mom’s a liar and also kidnapped! (X-Factor #58)

Man, nobody ever invites us to these parties. (X-Factor #58)

So much is happening in this panel! (X-Factor #58)

Charlotte Jones is the hero we need. (X-Factor #58)

Jeez, guys! Knock first! (X-Factor #59)

Charlotte’s mother-in-law is basically the greatest. (X-Factor #59)

“This… this is how parenting works, right?” (X-Factor #59)

God, that last panel. Perfect. (X-Factor #59)

WOOOOO SPRING BREAK (X-Factor #59)

Next time: Old Man Logan.

As Mentioned in Episode 147 – The Beginning of the End of the Beginning

February 25, 2017 Miles 10 comments

Listen to the podcast here.

Art by David Wynne. Buy prints at Redbubble, or contact David to purchase the original!

The first of many vertical two-page spreads (that could probably have just been a normal page, but hey). (New Mutants #90)

Copying and pasting artwork from The Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe – work smarter, not harder! (New Mutants #90)

Just… Just talk to her, Rictor! Talk to anyone! Even the reader!(New Mutants #90)

To be fair, that’s actually pretty in-character for Sunspot. (New Mutants #90)

Okay, that’s just awesome. (New Mutants #90)

“We’ve got to save our friend! But first – pose!” (New Mutants #90)

Behold – crotches! And also a pretty cool fight. (New Mutants #91)

“Shouldn’t our parents have signed permission slips for this field trip, teach?” (New Mutants #91)

Preeeeetty sure this is the beginning of a complicated mating dance. Or just the start of date night. (New Mutants #91)

And then Cable fought robots so well that Rictor forgave him for killing his dad. (New Mutants #91)

That pretty much says it all, huh? (New Mutants #93)

Hey, Rictor got a new costume! And a lot more hair! (New Mutants #93)

“We’re from Japan! Can you tell?” (New Mutants #93)

“My god! Not another use!” (New Mutants #93)

“Why, someone who’s too awesome for backgrounds, of course!” (New Mutants #93)

Give the laxatives some time to work, guys. It’ll be okay. (New Mutants #94)

And then the 90s 90s’d us right in the 90s. (New Mutants #94)

Please note that Cannonball is stealing a key from Dragoness’s headdress in the bottom panel. With his hair, I guess? (New Mutants #94)

Okay, that’s just adorable. (New Mutants #94)

Magneto this guy ain’t.

And that was the last we ever saw of Stryfe and the MLF! (New Mutants #94)

Almost forgot the lovingly-rendered butt!

Next time: X-Factor versus psychic vampires!

As Mentioned in Episode 146 – Asshole Factor

February 16, 2017 Jay 2 comments

Listen to the podcast here.

Art by David Wynne. Buy prints at Redbubble, or contact David to purchase the original!

This Sidney Poitier movie has taken an unexpected turn. (Excalibur #25)

Chris Wozniak is not Alan Davis; but then, few are. (Excalibur #25)

Death, Death, Death, and Death. (Excalibur #25)

This cannot possibly end badly, right? (Excalibur #26)

Dark Phoenix Saga callback! (Excalibur #26)

Days of Future Past callback! We’re hitting all the classics this issue! (Excalibur #26)

The best ruse. (Excalibur #26)

“…you asshole.” (Excalibur #26)

Oh, man. Barry Windsor-Smith and Bill Sienkiewicz should draw all the reality warpers. (Excalibur #27)

Nigel is just incredibly persistently awful. (Excalibur #27)

Even odds that they’ll be legitimately intimidated by Vixen’s killer abs. (Excalibur #27)

Meanwhile in Nth Man… (Excalibur #27)

Excalibur in a nutshell. (Excalibur #27)

‘Kay. (Excalibur #27)

I appreciate the de facto citation. (Excalibur #27)

NEXT EPISODE: Yep.

As Mentioned in Episode 145 – Remy & ‘Ro

February 5, 2017 Miles 6 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Buy prints at RedBubble, or contact David to purchase the original!

This will be important later. Much later. (Uncanny X-Men #265)

“If only there were some sort of… dangerous… room in which to train! (Uncanny X-Men #265)

Man, dig that body language. Lots of folks forget that the Orphan-Maker is a kid – not Bill Jaaska. (Uncanny X-Men #265)

The Shadow King is the worst, but his Jacob Reisz incarnation is extra-the-worst. (Uncanny X-Men #265)

“Dad, you grew a beard! Mom, you grew a OH DEAR GOD WHAT THE HELL IS THAT” (Uncanny X-Men #265)

When life gives you amnesia-lemons, make thievery-lemonade! (Uncanny X-Men #265)

Seriously: Extra The Worst. (Uncanny X-Men #265)

Storm commands the lightning and the storm and the wet towel right in your face! (Uncanny X-Men #266)

It’s kind of arbitrary that the Shadow King and Storm are nemeses, but damn if it doesn’t completely work. (Uncanny X-Men #266)

Hey, it’s Gambit’s first full panel! “Who is that mysterious and surprisingly colorful man?” (Uncanny X-Men #266)

Gambit’s powers used to work a little differently. Well, for one issue, anyway – the whole eyes-and-spikes thing will be mostly gone by next time. (Uncanny X-Men #266)

This, for the record, is the speech that Evil Lian Shen sees as being full of innuendo. (Uncanny X-Men #266)

I knew you’d been together for a long time, Mystique and Destiny, but I didn’t know that you were SUPER HOT. (Uncanny X-Men #266)

Any scene involving Mystique: exactly as it seems, of course. (Uncanny X-Men #266)

Suddenly, Jim Lee! (Uncanny X-Men #267)

Gambit’s too good for panel borders. (Uncanny X-Men #267)

Okay, that’s legitimately charming. (Uncanny X-Men #267)

I would read an entire series about what happens on this page. (Uncanny X-Men #267)

Ororo Munroe: badass at any age. (Uncanny X-Men #267)

Robot-suit fight! (Uncanny X-Men #267)

*triumphant wailing guitars* (Uncanny X-Men #267)

Next time: Excalibur meanders.

As Mentioned in Episode 144 – Giant-Size Special #5 (feat. Kid Apocalypse)

January 29, 2017 Miles 5 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Buy prints at Redbubble, or contact David to purchase the original!

Your friend is extremely agitated and saying strange things. Do you: a) call a super-scientist like Reed Richards, b) call a telepath like Jean Grey, or c) throw her in a straitjacket and hope for the best? (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Wolverine violently poses forward! (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Cable as a wizard with Warlock as a wizard-staff? YES PLEASE (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

You can tell a lot about an artist by how they draw Warlock. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Oh, Doug the Peasant – you may not have your 616 counterpart’s mutant linguistic abilities or Alan Davis Hair Swoop, but at least you have… a mom who’s kind of a jerk? (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

“I mean, jeez, Richard! I could have been on the can or something! (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Yeah, that’s pretty much the normal way to check how strong booze is. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Congratulations, Princess Rain! Now that you’re properly orphaned, you can start your quest – grab a wooden sword and cloth armor and get going! (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Fantasy-Magneto’s outfit: not all that different from Normal-Magneto’s outfit. That reflects well on both of them. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

“You make a valid point owwwwww” (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Magnus’s text parser needs some work. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

New Mutants, Earth 616 style… (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

…and Earth 1991 style. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Andy Kubert draws a pretty kick-ass Werewolf Rahne. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Okay, I know Wolverine’s the bad guy right now, but that’s legit badass. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

This was my favorite part of Hugh Jackman’s Les Miserables. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Cable: master of witty comebacks in any reality. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Wolverine improving his catchphrase? Magnus playing Sentinel? This spread has it all! (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

This is no one’s finest hour. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Wake up, punch Cable, fall back asleep. I’d call that a successful day! (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Wolverine, I know you meant that to be reassuring, but it actually sounds pretty threatening. (Wolverine: Rahne of Terra)

Next time: this guy.

THE 2016 SUPER DOCTOR ASTRONAUT PETER CORBEAU AWARDS FOR EXCELLENCE IN X-CELLENCE

Best X-Writer: Dennis Hopeless
Best X-Artist: Alti Firmansyah
Best X-Colorist: David Curiel
Best Ongoing Series: All-New Wolverine
Best Miniseries: Worst X-Man Ever
Good Sport Award: Scott Koblish
Best Book Miles Wishes He Hadn’t Put Off Reading For This Long: Marjorie Liu’s X-23
Fun-Matters-More-Than-Good Award: X-Men: Apocalypse
Best Actual Wolverine Award: Jonathan the Actual Wolverine
Irene Adler Memorial Award for Most Anticipated Upcoming Book Or Series: Generation X
Cyclops Has A Good Day award: Cyclops had no good days.
Best Stealth X-Series: New Avengers
Kristafer Anka Award For Best Withering Sneer In An X-Book: Emma Frost in Inhumans vs. X-Men #1
Wet Noodle Award: The Noodle Incident
Making Lemonade Award: Inhumans vs. X-Men
Best Non-X Marvel Book: The Vision

CLASSIC CORBEAUS (for older X-material covered in the podcast during 2016)

Best Cover Ever Forever: Excalibur #4
Buried Treasure: Havok & Wolverine: Meltdown
Why-Isn’t-This-Collected Award: X-Factor: Judgment War
Still Crying Award: New Mutants #64
The Unhand That Elf Award: “Unhand that elf!”
Better To Reign In Hell Award: Madelyne Pryor
You Tried Award: Illyana Rasputin
ABD Award: Havok, for still not finishing his dissertation

AND

Still the Best Listeners of Any Podcast, Ever – You!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING:

Find Kid Apocalypse on Twitter and Bandcamp!
Listen to Dennis Hopeless’s original, super-secret, censored version of the Noodle Incident in the cold open of Episode 104!
You can hear Scott Koblish’s rap battle with Jay in the cold open to Episode 105…
…and his performance of Jay’s song about Summers continuity in the cold open to Episode 134!