Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: Alison Blaire

As Mentioned in Episode 183 – Mutant Death Factor

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All of those facial expressions are great. (X-Men #4)
Ewwwww. (X-Men #4)
File this one under “references that haven’t aged all that coherently.” (X-Men #4)
She yelled so hard it changed the shape of the panels! (X-Men #4)
These jerks and their delightful wardrobe! (X-Men #4)
Why is he allowed to live there, again? (X-Men #4)
That is… an outfit. (X-Men #4)
You can almost hear the inchoate yelling. (X-Men #5)
Cerebro is officially ridiculous. I mean, more ridiculous than usual. (X-Men #5)
Psylocke, just admit that you were sunbathing. No one will judge you. (X-Men #5)
More Fenris fashions. (X-Men #5)
“We worked really hard to reconcile the continuity between these two titles, and we wanted to make damn sure that you appreciated the effort.” (X-Men #5)
Cyclops was right. (X-Men #5)
That’s actually a really cool way to transition into a flashback. (X-Men #5)
“In addition to a Mutant Death Factor, I come with my own exposition!” (X-Men #6)
Someone’s crossed the X-axis! (X-Men #6)
He’s also got a dark pink tie in some panels. (X-Men #6)
SERIOUSLY WHAT ARE THOSE THINGS HE’S STUCK IN (X-Men #7)
Psylocke is the master of the deadpan plot twist. (X-Men #7)
If you don’t automatically hear this line delivered by Christian Kane as Eliot Spencer, I don’t know what to tell you. (X-Men #7)
Maverick. (X-Men #7)
It’s rough to be Alison Blaire. (X-Men #5)
I unironically love this trio of dramatic poses; and also the fact that I absolutely believe that these characters would pose dramatically before fights. (X-Men #6)
Aw. (X-Men #6)
NEXT EPISODE: Larry Stroman somehow manages to make the MLF look cool. (Also, there’s a Hulk crossover.)

LINKS & FURTHER READING

  • COME SEE US AT EMERALD CITY COMIC CON! We’ll be at T-11 in Artist Alley all weekend; check back here for panel and party details!
  • I’m fairly sure I’ve linked to “Class of ’64” before, but it’s one of the best-developed reimaginings of the X-Men I’ve found, in or out of canon.
  • Unfortunately, R. Orion Martin’s “X-Men of Color” series no longer appears to be online, but you can learn more about it here and here. (Also worth reading: Darryl Ayo’s rebuttal to Martin’s article.)

183 – Mutant Death Factor

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David is on vacation this week! We hope you enjoy this substitute illustration of two gentlemen enjoying each other’s company.

In which Miles is almost caught up on The Gifted (but still hasn’t seen The Prisoner and should be very ashamed of himself); Omega Red is a cool action figure but a boring character; Professor Xavier definitely knows what you did last night; Fenris remains delightfully trashy; Weapon X had an improbably high survival rate; Sabretooth cleans up pretty well; we need to work some new rules for dividing up character voices; the Mojoverse has terrible employee benefits; and mongoose blood will definitely not give you superpowers.

X-PLAINED:

  • Refugees from the Age of Apocalypse
  • Creative use of teleportation
  • X-Modifiers
  • Jay & Miles at Emerald City Comic Con
  • X-Men vol. 2 #4-7
  • The sitcom model of creative logistics
  • One way to bring someone back to life
  • Mutant Death Factor
  • Omega Red (Arkady Gregorivich)
  • Wolverine’s school pictures
  • Gambit’s ponytail and the logistics thereof
  • Sex at the X-Mansion
  • Fenris fashion
  • Ritualistic facepalming
  • Moira MacTaggert’s nightmares
  • Formalwear and motorcycle safety
  • An elegantly choreographed cockblock
  • Retracting tentacle logistics
  • Carbonadium synthesizers
  • Dr. Pepper Twizzlers
  • Ponytails as moral compasses
  • Sabretooth’s excellent taste in formalwear
  • Ornithology
  • Those big, weird tube handcuff things
  • Cyclops and Wolverine’s eventual friendship
  • The return of Longshot
  • What would happen if you gave a human a transfusion of mongoose blood
  • Some X-Cellent fanfiction
  • X-details we’d change

NEXT EPISODE: X-Factor Meets the Hulk!

Special thanks to consulting X-Pert and Actual Scientist Dr. Lauriel Earley!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

138 – What Would Dazzler Do?

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Art by David Wynne

In which we continue to follow the post-Siege Perilous X-Men; Dazzler finally makes her big-screen debut; Callisto gets a day job; Colossus gets a ponytail; still more X-Men fake their deaths; Jean Grey gets tentacles; Professor Wolverine is a jerk; and Jay overthinks Community.

X-PLAINED:

  • The new-new Howling Commandos
  • Hit-Monkey
  • Uncanny X-Men #259-263
  • Dazzler: The Movie (again)
  • Freddie Stanacheck
  • Eric Beale
  • What Dazzler would do
  • Peter Nicholas
  • Jenny Ransome and Phillip Moreau (again)
  • Twin Peaks references, canonical and otherwise
  • Genoshan foreign policy
  • The value of allegory
  • Some regrettable X-costumes
  • That time Jean Grey got tentacles
  • Molly the cat
  • Dubious medical ethics
  • Hardcase and the Harriers
  • An unlikely pizza party
  • A theoretical Community/X-Men costume party

NEXT EPISODE: Spotlight on the Starjammers!

You can find the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re in the process of migrating our official shop to TeePublic! Click over to check it out! (You can still find the designs we haven’t moved yet at Redbubble.)

As Mentioned in Episode 124 – The Cruelest Planet

9 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
“Yep, those four seconds of fighting totally justified the millions of dollars we spent on this Wolverine robot. Thanks, crime!” (Uncanny X-Men #248)
Musical X-Men! Ricochet Rita! Involuntary foreshadowing! This issue’s got it all. (Uncanny X-Men #248)
Goodbye, Longshot. (Uncanny X-Men #248)
“This Jim Lee workout program has been working really well! Also, Ali, maybe you should start using sunscreen?” (Uncanny X-Men #248)
Intentions versus outcomes. Oh, Havok… (Uncanny X-Men #248)
Goodbye, Storm. (Uncanny X-Men #248)
This way, no one will ever forget where to sit! Also, tragedy. So much tragedy. (Uncanny X-Men #249)
We didn’t talk much about this in the episode, but Polaris’s life is pretty terrible when this arc starts. (Uncanny X-Men #249)
Colossus’s teacher is totally going to call Mr. and Mrs. Rasputin in for a parent-teacher conference. (Uncanny X-Men #249)
“Hey, we heard there was a party going on here? We brought brewskis!” (Uncanny X-Men #249)
BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM (Uncanny X-Men #249)
Everything in this issue is both epic and overly abrupt. (Uncanny X-Men #250)
EWWWWWWW (Uncanny X-Men #250)
Psylocke makes some incredibly questionable decisions next issue to get the X-Men out of Australia, but I can’t fully blame her… (Uncanny X-Men #250)
Suddenly, it’s every notable Savage Land character ever! Hi, guys! (Uncanny X-Men #250)
This scene: so weird. So awesome. But also so weird. (Uncanny X-Men #250)
By Crom! (Uncanny X-Men #251)
A fine dose of dream logic, fueled by pure continuity. (Uncanny X-Men #251)
Goodbye, Colossus. (Uncanny X-Men #251)
Goodbye, Dazzler. (Uncanny X-Men #251)
Goodbye, Havok. (Uncanny X-Men #251)
Goodbye, Psylocke. (Uncanny X-Men #251)
The visual equivalent of show, don’t tell. (Uncanny X-Men #251)
Ever have a day so shitty you hallucinated the future? (Uncanny X-Men #251)
Damn, Logan. Damn. (Uncanny X-Men #251)
NEXT WEEK: Giant-Size Summer Special: Evolution Edition!

LINKS & FURTHER READING:

124 – The Cruelest Planet

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which everyone dies (or something); every Summers is miserable in their own way; we are pretty done with Nanny and the Orphanmaker; Lady Deathstrike is a surprisingly astute art critic; the X-Men’s digital invisibility does not extend to the White Pages; we venture into slightly less charted territory; Wolverine has a really bad day; and you should totally come hang out with us at Rose City Comic Con!

X-PLAINED:

  • Origins of Lady Deathstrike
  • Jay & Miles at Rose City Comic Con
  • X-Ray party etiquette
  • Uncanny X-Men #248-251
  • The precise inverse of an anticlimax
  • The Siege Perilous (more) (again)
  • Dramatic parallels
  • Summers tragedy disambiguation
  • Jim Lee’s first X-issue
  • The apparent death of Storm (this time)
  • The merged Reavers
  • What it takes for Jay to play a sidescroller
  • An X-band
  • Longshot’s departure
  • A really ineffective rescue
  • Art-critic Deathstrike
  • Administrative assistant Jubilee
  • Zaladane
  • An unconventional approach to genealogy
  • The ickiest method of mind control
  • Dark Claw

NEXT EPISODE: GIANT-SIZE SUMMER SPECIAL!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 109 – The Passion of Madelyne Pryor

9 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
It’s the whole gang! Kind of! And some of them are evil! BUT STILL! (Uncanny X-Men #242)
No, it’s not. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
SEE? (Uncanny X-Men #242)
Only one of many reasons that enthusiastic consent is important. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
Iceman is so underrated. Dude’s the heart and conscience of the original five. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
WELL, THEN. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
N’astirh may be evil, but he has impeccable taste in infernal vehicles. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
That’s the cold wind of metaphor, Alex. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
Madelyne Pryor knows from genre conventions. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
Aw, man. These two. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
Inferno’s a pretty dark crossover, but it has some really damn delightful moments. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
Love N’astirh’s face in that first panel. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
No one draws a possessed skyline like Silvestri. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
SUCKERS. You’ve still got three issues left! (Uncanny X-Men #242)
I’m genuinely curious as to whether this splash page started out as a cover design. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
“We’ll laugh about this later.” (X-Factor #38)
THAT SOUND EFFECT! (X-Factor #38)
Madelyne Pryor is the best at villain speeches. (X-Factor #38)
This panel is awesome, which is probably why there are going to be a lot of callbacks to it. (X-Factor #38)
This sequence is kind of a great encapsulation of a lot of Scott and Alex’s relationship. (X-Factor #38)
Jean’s rocky and reluctant alliance with the Phoenix force makes each of them a good deal more interesting. (X-Factor #38)
The most important relationship–and scenes–in Inferno are between Jean and Madelyne. I really wish we’d gotten more of the two of them together. (X-Factor #38)
“We’ll need to harness the power of all of our best sound effects!” (X-Factor #38)
Perfect panel is perfect. (X-Factor #38)
On one hand: this is all kind of Scott’s fault. On the other hand: it’s hard not to feel bad for him. (X-Factor #38)
Inferno: In which everyone is wrong and everyone is sympathetic. (X-Factor #38)
OH, YEAH! (Uncanny X-Men #243)
X-Factor will continue to play with this idea to some extent, but it’ll fade away pretty fast, and that’s a damn shame. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
Ditto, this. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
Jean, Madelyne, or Phoenix; her story at its best will always be about self-determination. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
Valid. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
Pawing through the X-Men’s stuff is one of the less invasive things Sinister has done in this arc, but there’s something extra creepy about it. (Uncanny X-Men #242)
Walter Simonson’s ability to make Longshot’s hair look good is the eight wonder of the world. (X-Factor #39)
Scott Summers’ Life Is An Actual Anxiety Dream, chapter infinity. (X-Factor #39)
Oh, hey, it’s the rest of Cyclops’s backstory! (X-Factor #39)
Does Nebraska even have a Department of Social Services? (X-Factor #39)
I just really love this page. (X-Factor #39)
This panel might have the highest appearance-to-reality-of-finality ratio in comics. (X-Factor #39)
And they all lived happily ever after. (X-Factor #39)
NEXT WEEK: Apocalypse for Beginners!

LINKS & FURTHER LISTENING

109 – The Passion of Madelyne Pryor

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

 

In which you should not presume to judge Madelyne Pryor by your standards; we wrap up the core plot of Inferno (but still somehow have two episodes left to go); sympathetic is not the same thing as right; Storm and Jean use friendship and it’s super effective; Iceman is basically incorruptible; Angel gets a new codename; Cyclops gets a backstory; Sinister is aptly named; and Inferno makes retcons into retconade.

X-PLAINED:

  • Limbo vs. Limbo
  • Hel vs. Hell
  • Uncanny X-Men #242-243
  • X-Factor #38-39
  • A moment that does not speak eloquently for itself
  • Several extended misunderstandings
  • The difference between sympathetic and right
  • N’astirh’s sweet ride
  • A false binary
  • The Goblin Prince
  • Yet another reason Havok should have finished his dissertation
  • The power of friendship
  • The Rube Goldberg approach to combat
  • Superconductivity, kind of
  • Our least favorite retcon in Inferno
  • The Summers brothers summed up in a single scene
  • Clone ethics
  • Why we like it when characters screw up
  • Our favorite retcons
  • How to prep for X-Men: Apocalypse

NEXT WEEK: Apocalypse for Beginners

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes, Google Play, or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 108 – What Price Glory

15 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Perfect cover is perfect. (Uncanny X-Men #239)
Hey, kids! Can you count the OSHA violations on this page? (Uncanny X-Men #239)
Does it get more Mr. Sinister than sitting on a giant crystal throne playing with X-Men action figures and expositing dramatically to himself? No. No, it does not. (Uncanny X-Men #239)
This moment is so good, and so chilling. (Uncanny X-Men #239)
Sometimes you eat the bar, and sometimes the bar eats you. (Uncanny X-Men #239)
ABORT ABORT BAD IDEA ABORT (Uncanny X-Men #239)
“Also, apparently they were really into Pinterest.” (Uncanny X-Men #239)
I am pretty sure I have seen this exact image on the front cover of at least one VHS tape. (Uncanny X-Men #239)
Here’s every panel of Madelyne’s black dress, in order. (Uncanny X-Men #240)
Hi, M-Squad. Bye, M-Squad. (Uncanny X-Men #240)
This whole scene is so exquisitely unsettling. (Uncanny X-Men #240)
Rogue, that is… quite an outfit. (Uncanny X-Men #240)
Meanwhile, in a completely different comic book. (Uncanny X-Men #240)
“Mr. Weatherbee didn’t really go into the details of this exchange program.” (Uncanny X-Men #240)
I don’t know why I find Scrambler so endlessly hilarious, but, GOD, I do. (Uncanny X-Men #240)
Silvestri doesn’t get to do nearly as much as Blevins or Simonson with possessed objects; but he’ll make up for it with the amazing demonic cityscapes in #242. (Uncanny X-Men #241)
Close Encounters with the Fourth Wall, Colossus Edition. (Nah, they’re clones. BUT STILL.) (Uncanny X-Men #241)
I swear this police-car demon is a reference to SOMETHING, but I can’t for the life of me remember what. (Uncanny X-Men #241)
“Fuck this. I’m gonna go hang out in New Mutants.” (Uncanny X-Men #241)
This cannot POSSIBLY end well. (Uncanny X-Men #241)
“Also, I liked that scene way more when Paul Smith drew it.” (Uncanny X-Men #240)
The Greys really never catch a break. (Uncanny X-Men #240)
Nebraska: Definitely the worst state. (Uncanny X-Men #240)
And you thought your family holidays were awkward. (Uncanny X-Men #241)
Oh, damn. (Uncanny X-Men #241)
There’s at least one alternate universe in which Mister Sinister founded the X-men; but the only detail I remember is that their costumes are WAY fancier. (Uncanny X-Men #241)
This detail makes Madelyne’s story infinitely sadder. (Uncanny X-Men #241)
In which Mister Sinister effectively seals the fate of the world. (Uncanny X-Men #241)
That’s. My. Girl. (Uncanny X-Men #241)
Oh, snap. (Uncanny X-Men #241)
And then a hot dog stand ate Calvin and Hobbes. (X-Factor #36)
Awwww. (X-Factor #36)
Cool scene; dumb hats. (X-Factor #36)
In a just world, every time you looked at this panel, heroic music would start playing. (X-Factor #36)
Let’s all just take a moment to admire the composition of this splash page. (X-Factor #37)
These panels were fine in context of the page, but then I cropped them, and now all I can think of is that one really unsettling video of a sloth petting a cat. (X-Factor #37)
“Okay, but that’s gonna be really awkward at the bank.” (X-Factor #37)
Wait, what? (X-Factor #37)
“Also, you literally just teleported.” (X-Factor #37)
NEXT WEEK: The Passion of Madelyne Pryor

LINKS & FURTHER READING:

108 – What Price Glory

40 comments

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Android | RSS

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.

In which we recap nearly 200 issues in under three minutes; Madelyne Pryor is the Medea of X-Men; Mister Sinister takes the stage; Dazzler is basically an ’80s movie refugee; Scrambler may or may not be an exchange student from the Riverdale Marauders; Marc Silvestri is excellent at some things and less so at others; nothing good happens in Nebraska; Trish Tilby is the April O’Neil of X-Factor; and we swear that it was a total coincidence that this episode went up on Mother’s Day.

X-PLAINED:

  • One solution to the existential conundrum of the Carol Danvers who is also kind of part of Rogue
  • Pretty much everything that’s happened since the Dark Phoenix Saga
  • The structure of Inferno
  • Uncanny X-Men #239-241
  • X-Factor #36-37
  • The rise of the Goblin Queen
  • Several deaths in elevators
  • Mister Sinister and his amazing action-figure collection
  • The evolution of Mark Silvestri
  • Madelyne and Alex
  • A very symbolic dress
  • The Rainbow Room
  • M-Squad
  • That damn costume
  • 1989 in outfit form
  • Jay’s favorite Marauder
  • Rats-R-Us
  • Wolverine vs. a mail box
  • The X-Men, but evil
  • The secret origin of Madelyne Pryor
  • A long-anticipated reunion
  • Objects we’d demonically animate
  • Which X-Man should do your taxes

NEXT WEEK: The Passion of Madelyne Pryor

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes, Google Play, or Stitcher!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 99 – Those Who Walk Away from Genosha

13 comments

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available at the shop, or contact David to purchase the original.
The whole arc summed up in a single image. (Uncanny X-Men #235)
Hawkshaw’s actual mutant power is talking in old-timey detective slang. (Uncanny X-Men #235)
“Y’know, when I’m not running a massive underground IT complex and consorting with demons.” (Uncanny X-Men #235)
Unlike the Genoshans, the X-Men actually arrive with extra clothes when they teleport. (Uncanny X-Men #235)
“Yes, and…” (Uncanny X-Men #235)
NAKED FIGHT! Take a drink, and follow it with a beer back. (Uncanny X-Men #236)
The stark normalcy of (human) life on Genosha is played for pretty spectacular contrast to horror’s it’s built upon. (Uncanny X-Men #236)
“Here in Genosha, we’re more into D.C.” (Uncanny X-Men #236)
BUTTERFLY MUSTACHE! (Uncanny X-Men #236)
Meet N’astirh: the most polite demon. Kinda. For now. (Uncanny X-Men #236)
We’d all like to think we’ve got a little Carol Danvers in us, but it’s rarely quite this literal. (Uncanny X-Men #236)
THAT OUTFIT. (Uncanny X-Men #236)
The best thing about being a supervillain is that people respect it when you don’t feel like multitasking. (Uncanny X-Men #236)
Damn, Genegineer. (Uncanny X-Men #237)
Don’t fuck with Madelyne Pryor. (Uncanny X-Men #237)
Or Wolverine, for that matter. (Uncanny X-Men #237)
OH SHIT (Uncanny X-Men #238)
He’s a homophone! Get it? ‘Cause Sinister is a Jeangineer! (Uncanny X-Men #238)
“Fuck foreshadowing. I’m turning on the damn SPOTLIGHT.” (Uncanny X-Men #238)
Genosha is actually kind of a metaphor–just not for what you first think. (Uncanny X-Men #238)
NEXT EPISODE: Chris Claremont.

LINKS & FURTHER READING: