Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: beast

As Mentioned in Episode 69 – Weird Science

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 8/9/2015 in the shop (once Redbubble’s uploader starts working again, anyway), or contact David for the original.
Just another 70’s monster comic. You’d never know it was about an X-Man. (Amazing Adventures #11)
Drama, destruction, and slightly off-model mutants. (Amazing Adventures #11)
Flashback to Hank leaving the X-Men. Who knows if he’ll ever come back? (Amazing Adventures #11)
In which Carl Maddicks is a total jerk, and Hank McCoy is very good at science. (Amazing Adventures #11)
Great use of panel borders by Tom Sutton on this page. (Amazing Adventures #11)
The Beast at the height of his invulnerability and his creepiness. (Amazing Adventures #11)
Spectacularly horrific splash page by Tom Sutton and Mike Ploog (Amazing Adventure #12)
The closet’s just more trouble than it’s worth. (Amazing Adventure #12)
A visually striking panel of Iron Man flirting with the Beast. (Amazing Adventure #12)
Don’t panic; nothing on this page is actually happening. (Amazing Adventure #12)
Mastermind is as long-winded as Unus is unimpressed. (Amazing Adventure #13)
The Carnival is a haven for the strangest of mutants and the saddest of clowns. (Amazing Adventure #13)
Two mysterious and seemingly boring people arrive at the super-science ultra-mega-labs of the Brand Corporation. (Amazing Adventure #13)
This Beast is a little intense. (Amazing Adventure #13)
When Mastermind loses, he loses hard. (Amazing Adventure #13)
Drama in pajamas. (Amazing Adventure #14)
If you’ve never met Quasimodo the Living Computer… You’re probably fine, actually. (Amazing Adventures #14)
We never learn why Hank went to Patsy’s place to collapse, but the more important question is, why does she keep that Target dorm room floor lamp right in front of the door?(Amazing Adventures #15)
Hank really hasn’t been running his whole life, but film noir dialogue seems appropriate for the debut of the black (soon to be blue) Beast. (Amazing Adventures #15)
At the Xavier School, Scott stands silently in shadow, while Charles and Jean won’t let Warren use the switchboard. (Amazing Adventures #15)
Angel takes things in stride. (Amazing Adventures #15)
Nothing can defeat the hugging power of the Beast. (Amazing Adventures #15)
Hank meets Roy Thomas, and the Juggernaut literally falls out of the sky. (Amazing Adventures #16)
Meanwhile, in Canada… (The Incredible Hulk #161)
Hank continues to make odd choices in pretty much everything. (The Incredible Hulk #161)
The Hulk drops in. (The Incredible Hulk #161)
Wheel of mutants (this is all part of Nixon’s plan). (Captain America #174)
This is what happened in the 616 instead of Watergate. (Captain America #175)
Edward G. Robinson shows up at Avenger auditions. (Avengers #137)
Introducing the new smiling, fun-loving Beast. I wonder why his eyelids are so heavy? (Avengers #137)
The soothing effects of Stevie Wonder and Carlos Castaneda. (Avengers #137)
Patsy Walker finally lives her dream. (Avengers #144)
Family drama at the Indian restaurant. (Marvel Team-Up #124)
Hank has a bad day at the disco. (Avengers #178)
NEXT WEEK: Everything is terrible.

Special thanks to our awesome guest hosts, Elle Collins and Graeme McMillan, who not only covered the episode, but also provided this visual companion AND answered a bunch more questions in text (we’ll be posting those later this week). If you love Elle and Graeme as much as we do and want to hear more of ’em, here’s where to find those two on the web:

69 – Weird Science, with Elle Collins and Graeme McMillan

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 8/9/2015 in the shop (once Redbubble’s uploader starts working again, anyway), or contact David for the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 8/9/2015 in the shop (once Redbubble’s uploader starts working again, anyway), or contact David for the original.

In which Elle and Graeme save the day; Hank McCoy joins the real world (sort of) (briefly); Carl Maddicks may or may not be undead; academic discourse in the Marvel Universe leaves a few things to be desired; Steve Englehart is an unsung hero of X-Men; Mastermind lives up to his name; Warren Worthington has a good attitude about mutation; and Avengers Beast is the best Beast; and Graeme has strong feelings about Moira MacTaggert.

X-PLAINED:

  • The complex romantic life of Patsy Walker
  • The increasingly terrible life choices of Hank McCoy
  • Amazing Adventures #11-17
  • Incredible Hulk #161
  • Captain America #173-175
  • Avengers #137, 144, & 178
  • Marvel Team-Up #124
  • Life after the X-Men
  • The Brand Corporation
  • Carl Maddicks (again)
  • Vampire Secret Agent Linda Donaldson
  • The dubious chemical cause of mutation
  • Beast as proto-Wolverine
  • Steve Englehart
  • The high price of passing
  • Several unusually realistic latex masks
  • Norman Mailer’s Handbook for Unliberated Women
  • Sad clowns
  • Buzz Baxter
  • Hellcat (Patsy Walker)
  • Someone who might be Carole King, Indira Gandhi, or your sister (but isn’t)
  • Questionable corporate practices
  • Quasimodo (but not that one)
  • Semantics of fur color
  • The Griffin
  • The Secret Empire
  • Actual supervillain Richard Nixon
  • Mimic (Cal Rankin)
  • Avengers Auditions
  • Best Beast stories
  • Scotland

Special thanks to guest hosts Elle Collins & Graeme McMillan!

NEXT WEEK: Everything is terrible.

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 66 – The Mutant Massacre, Part 2

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/26/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
If this week’s illustration reminds you of last week’s, that’s because they’re two parts of this rad panorama! Again, prints are available until 7/26/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
Mystique, what are you even doing? (X-Factor #9)
This, again. (X-Factor #9)
Passing privilege in action! (X-Factor #9)
That’s actually pretty clever. (X-Factor #9)
MOPPETS. (X-Factor #9)
Meanwhile in Apartment 3G… (X-Factor #10)
WRONG CHOICE, ANGEL. (X-Factor #10)
One horseman down, three to go. (X-Factor #10)
Damn, Jean. (X-Factor #10)
Ouch. (X-Factor #10)
OUCH. (X-Factor #10)
There is never a worst time to be a Power kid than during an X-line crossover. (Power Pack #27)
Everyone hates X-Factor. (Power Pack #27)
It really does kind of cheapen Sabretooth’s menace when a bunch of kids can take him down–even these kids. (Power Pack #27)
COMICS FOR KIDS. (Power Pack #27)
And then everything was sad forever. (Power Pack #27)
BEHOLD THIS MAJESTIC THUNDER GOD AND HIS MAJESTIC BEARD! (The Mighty Thor #373)
No, but seriously, though. (The Mighty Thor #373)
Thor has frog friends. (The Mighty Thor #373)
Have we mentioned that we love Thor? We love Thor. (The Mighty Thor #373)
There’s a reason that Walter Simonson is the gold standard for epic dialogue. (The Mighty Thor #374)
Aw. (The Mighty Thor #374)
There’s a lot of straight-up killing on the hero side of this event. (The Mighty Thor #374)
(X-Men #9, specifically.) (The Mighty Thor #374)
Thor: Definitely the best dude you know. (The Mighty Thor #374)
It’s funny, because miscommunication. (X-Factor #11)
“Run! It’s a crossover issue!” (X-Factor #11)
X-Factor drinking game: Drink every time someone has to explain the relationship between X-Factor and the X-Terminators. (X-Factor #11)
Halfway there, Apocalypse! (X-Factor #11)
Ouch. (X-Factor #11)
On the upside: Boom-Boom! (X-Factor #11)
NEXT WEEK: The New Mutants party like it’s 1299!

LINKS & FURTHER READING

  • Listen to Episode 65–The Mutant Massacre, Part 1–here!
  • You can find the Mutant Massacre reading order here.
  • Have you read Walter Simonson’s run of The Mighty Thor yet? You should really go do that. It starts here.

66 – The Mutant Massacre, Part 2

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/26/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/26/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.

In which we wrap up our first official two-parter; Gambit ruins everything; Rachel has a theory about Mister Sinister; Marvel communication technology is behind the times; Trish Tilby is tired of your bullshit; Walter Simonson is the best of the best; X-Factor pulls it together; Power Pack gets uncomfortably dark; Miles has Thor feelings; and even more mutants die.

NOTE: This episode is the second of a two-parter! If you haven’t listened to Episode 65, where we cover the first half of the mutant massacre, you should probably do that before you listen to this one!

X-PLAINED:

  • Masque
  • Tentacle disambiguation
  • More of the Mutant Massacre
  • A Sinister hypothesis
  • Several Marauder-related retcons
  • X-Factor #9-11
  • Power Pack #27
  • The Mighty Thor #373-374
  • Trish Tilby
  • Artie & Leech
  • Several awkward reunions
  • Walter Simonson
  • The fall of Angel
  • Apocalypse’s horsemen
  • Yet another crossover that will probably scar the Power kids for life
  • Franklin Richards
  • Thor, Donald Blake, and Sigurd Jarlson
  • The best issue of any comic, ever.
  • The Tunnelers
  • Ongoing repercussions of the Mutant Massacre
  • Rachel & Miles’s horseman identities
  • Which X-Men could and should wield Mjolnir

NEXT WEEK: The New Mutants party like it’s 1299!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 64 – Ski Lodge of Apocalypse

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Listen to the episode here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/12/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
A very happy 4th birthday to the Littlest Consulting X-Pert, Kestrel!
Because she is AWESOME, Kes decided that she wanted a party with all her kid friends and all her grown-up friends as superheroes. Here’s Rachel as slightly off-brand O5 Cyclops, and Miles as DIY Thor.
Full O5 group: Rachel as Cyclops, Dave Proctor as Beast, Douglas Wolk as Iceman, Jesse Miller as Angel, and Katie Proctor as Marvel Girl.
Come for the superheroics, stay for the soap opera! (X-Factor #6)
“Sorry I burned down your village. Here’s some gold.” (X-Factor #6)
Oh, THERE’S the Apocalypse we know and love! (X-Factor #6)
Even your villains are fed up with your angst, X-Factor. (X-Factor #6)
Ladies and gentlemen: the world’s oldest and most powerful mutant. (X-Factor #6)
Phoenix flare or pareidolia? YOU BE THE JUDGE! (X-Factor #6)
The Saddest Mutants (TM). (X-Factor #7)
“Look! A distraction!” Cyclops, we love you, but sometimes you really are the worst. (X-Factor #7)
These guys. (X-Factor #7)
SERIOUSLY WHY ARE YOU NOT ALREADY COSPLAYING SKIDS GO COSPLAY SKIDS (X-Factor #7)
Valid. (X-Factor #7)
This is almost embarrassing to read. (X-Factor #7)
X-Factor: fighting themselves metaphorically AND literally! Side note: This scene is funny until you realize X-Factor is turning Bulk and Glow Worm’s last desperate attempt to make a difference before their inevitable death into a farce. (X-Factor #7)
What. (X-Factor #8)
Aw, man. Right in the feels. (X-Factor #8)
Jean Was Right. (X-Factor #8)
VERA. (X-Factor #8)
Freedom Force briefings are so weird. (X-Factor #8)
“An invitation to a crossover? Hot dog!” (X-Factor #8)
I don’t know why I find Spiral just taking off mid-fight for a different comic so funny, but GOD, I do. (X-Factor #8)
“Come with me if you want to be FABULOUS!” (X-Factor #8)
NEXT WEEK: The Mutant Massacre begins!

LINKS & FURTHER READING:

  • We’ve linked before to Chris Claremont’s X-Men, but we’re doing it again, because it’s fascinating and you should all go watch it.
  • If you are fond of loving snark and deep dives into Marvel continuity, you should really already be reading Max Carleton’s Waiting for the Trade. (If you’re not fond of those things, why are you here?)

64 – Ski Lodge of Apocalypse

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/12/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 7/12/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.

In which Louise Simonson saves X-Factor; Apocalypse gets off to a rough start; Cyclops is bad at people; Apocalypse should be the Kingpin of X-Men; Jean Grey is sick of your bullshit; you should totally cosplay Skids; and Mystique fundamentally misunderstands branding.

X-PLAINED

  • The Maximoff family tree
  • The Whizzer
  • X-Factor as sketch comedy
  • Louise Simonson
  • X-Factor #6-8
  • Apocalypse
  • Bulk
  • Glow Worm
  • Skids (Sally Blevins)
  • Weaponized fashion
  • Trish Tilby
  • Favorite Claremontisms
  • X-Finance

NEXT WEEK: The Mutant Massacre!

Special thanks to Master of Maximoffs Max Carleton of Waiting for the Trade.

A very happy birthday to the Consulting X-Pert Kestrel!

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned in Episode 57 – Apocalypse Soon

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Listen to the episode here!

Oh, this guy. (X-Factor #2)
As a side effect of her return from near-death, Jean can perfectly recall any outfit–except her own. (X-Factor #2)
“But at least I know how to put on my goddamn pants.” (X-Factor #2)
Oh, Vera, what have they done to you? (X-Factor #2)
“Trust me, this is in no way an allegory for any other situations in your life.” (X-Factor #2)
Walls are the real victims in Layton’s run. (X-Factor #2)
Why do thugs ever fall for that line? Seriously. (X-Factor #2)
It’s okay, Scott. We’re only a few issues away from Louise Simonson. (X-Factor #2)
X-Factor vs. yet another wall. (X-Factor #2)
Dr. Maddicks: kind of awful. (X-Factor #2)
In addition to being kind of a crap scientist, Carl Maddicks is a terrible parent. (X-Factor #3)
I was seriously considering having this entire as-mentioned just be X-Factor knocking down walls. (X-Factor #3)
Jean recognize her team’s signature move. (X-Factor #3)
Aaaaand there goes another wall. (X-Factor #3)
Scott and Jean finally have a talk about–wait, no, just kidding, they’re about to get interrupted by urgent news. (X-Factor #3)
AMAZING, Hank. AMAZING. (X-Factor #3)
LOOK AT THIS GLORIOUS COVER. (X-Factor Annual #1)
Wellp. (X-Factor Annual #1)
Thank you for that highly relevant footnote, comic book. (X-Factor Annual #1)
Not sure if this is better or worse than the underwear. (X-Factor Annual #1)
Headcanon: Heinreich has worked out a whole backstory for this secretary, and he’s really disappointed that he didn’t get to use more of it. (X-Factor Annual #1)
Serious question: is this the only time Bobby’s clothing transforms to ice along with him? DISCUSS. LEAVE NO STONE UNTURNED. (X-Factor Annual #1)
How come some of these people are wearing robot underpants and others are not? (X-Factor Annual #1)
The Crimson Dynamo is not, in fact, the Red Scare. UNFORTUNATELY. (X-Factor Annual #1)
But seriously, the mix-up is pretty understandable.
Iceman vs. Iceman! (X-Factor Annual #1)
Oh, for the love of… (X-Factor Annual #1)
They’re fighting Tower and knocking down a wall at the same time! Two drinks! (X-Factor #4)
Joanna Cargill is so awesome. SO. AWESOME. (X-Factor #4)
At least he put on pants this time? I guess? (X-Factor #4)
X-Factor: actually kind of terrible. (X-Factor #4)
In case you happened to be wondering where the original art from this page is, the answer is our office. (Thank you, Tom!) (X-Factor #4)
Does no one ever use doors in this comic? (X-Factor #4)
Best outfit, best character, worst attempt at a cliffhanger. Also, I’m pretty sure one of us used to have a Mage: The Ascension character named Time Shadow. (X-Factor #4)
“It’s like we were briefly allowed to evolve as characters but have since reverted to a social dynamic we had long since outgrown.” (X-Factor #5)
True Fact: If one of you had submitted this outfit for the plainclothes cosplay contest, you would have won, no questions asked. (X-Factor #5)
And there goes another wall. (X-Factor #5)
Frenzy has no patience for your sub-par command of Yiddish. (X-Factor #5)
The less-than-inspiring debut of one of the X-Men’s greatest villains. (X-Factor #5)
Many thanks to Bobby Roberts for 57 spectacular episodes of production, advice, and boundless patience. You are the best, and we love you forever. (Art by David Wynne.)
Next week: MINISERIES MAYHEM!

57 – Apocalypse Soon

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Art by David Wynne. We're not selling prints of this one, but you can still hit David up for the original!
Art by David Wynne. We’re not selling prints of this one, but you can still hit David up for the original!

In which Miles tries to find things to like about Bob Layton’s X-Factor run; Cyclops’s life is literally an anxiety dream; X-Factor is very Leverage; Layton’s Angel is just godawful; Rachel is all about the Red Scare; Frenzy is awesome; and we bid a fond farewell to producer Bobby Roberts.

X-PLAINED:

  • An Apocalypse that might have been
  • Mid-80s X-title thematic disambiguation
  • The limited value of nostalgia
  • Creative history of X-Factor
  • X-Factor #2-5 and Annual #1
  • The baffling reinvention of Vera Cantor
  • Tower (Edward Pasternak)
  • Dubious didactic strategies
  • Carl Maddicks
  • Artie Maddicks
  • Muffin the kitten
  • Bad timing
  • Soviet mutant policy
  • Soviet robot disambiguation
  • The Doppelganger (Wolfgang Heinreich)
  • A ruse
  • Alexei Garnov, Mentac the Living Computer, Concussion, Iron Curtain, and Siberian Tiger
  • The worst phonetic accent we have ever seen.
  • The Alliance of Evil
  • Frenzy (Joanna Cargill)
  • The color of Beast’s fur
  • Our favorite X-Men toys

NEXT WEEK: Miniseries Mayhem!

Many thanks to Bobby Roberts for 57 spectacular episodes of production, advice, and boundless patience. You are the best, and we love you forever.

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

We’re not selling prints of this week’s illustration, but you can contact David Wynne for the original!

As Mentioned In Episode 54 – Who You Gonna Call? (feat. Elle Collins)

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Listen to the podcast here!

Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 5/3/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
The New Defenders. (Defenders #127)
Moondragon, Cloud, Gargoyle, and Valkyrie demonstrate the kind of high drama and subtext that makes three ex-X-Men feel right at home. (Defenders #127)
Warren and Bobby simultaneously contemplate one of the great questions of the universe. (Defenders #126)
Hank opens up to Vera about his shifting personality. (Defenders #116)
The end of the last issue of Defenders. Total downer (except for the puppy). (Defenders #152)
All-New, All-Different. (X-Factor #1)
The worst part is that neither of them is wrong, exactly. (X-Factor #1)
Three guys who definitely don’t want to be superheroes anymore. (X-Factor #1)
Well, this can’t possibly end badly. (X-Factor #1)
OH GOD NEVER MIND. (X-Factor #1)
Rich people are different from the rest of us. (X-Factor #1)
Goddamnit, Warren. (X-Factor #1)
Goddamnit, Scott and Madelyne. (X-Factor #1)
Later, in Apartment 3-G… (X-Factor #1)
X-Factor is just painfully awkward on so many levels, for so long. (X-Factor #1)
“Seriously, Warren, you are LITERALLY WEARING A SUPERHERO COSTUME RIGHT NOW.” (X-Factor #1)
“Look, just go walk it off for a couple weeks. You’ll be fine.” (X-Factor #1)
If we had a dollar for every job interview that ended like this… (X-Factor #1)
Iceman is just goddamn delightful. (X-Factor #1)
There are several important things going on here, but all of them are overshadowed by the fact that Warren is wearing a cape with a sweater vest. (X-Factor #1)
It’s like they know how an intervention works, but not how it’s supposed to end. (X-Factor #1)
“Also, he’ll be gradually brainwashing us all and destroying our lives for the next year and change!” (X-Factor #1)
WE’RE HERE TO BELIEVE YOU! (X-Factor #1)
It just never stops sucking to be Rusty Collins. (X-Factor #1)
No, seriously. (X-Factor #1)
“It’s almost like some outside force is manipulating our lives, making sure to stretch this dramatic tension as long as possible.” (X-Factor #1)
How no one ever recognized the X-Terminators as the original five X-Men is one of the great mysteries of the Marvel Universe. (X-Factor #1)
NOTE: The appropriate soundtrack to literally every scene Cyclops is in in this issue is “Country Feedback,” by R.E.M., on repeat. (X-Factor #1)
WHO YOU GONNA CALL? (X-Factor #1)
“I mean, it’s been solicited as an ongoing, and everything.” (X-Factor #1)
Aw, Madelyne. (X-Factor #1)
NEXT WEEK: The Beyonder ruins everything. Again.

LINKS AND FURTHER READING:

54 – Who You Gonna Call? (feat. Elle Collins)

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Podcast: Play in new window | Download

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Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 5/3/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.
Art by David Wynne. Prints and cards available until 5/3/2015 in the shop, or contact David for the original.

In which the X-Men get their third ongoing series; Elle drops in to x-plain the Defenders; the band gets back together; rich people are not like the rest of us; Cyclops is in desperate need of some kind of intervention; and X-Factor is basically Ghostbusters.

X-PLAINED:

  • Cameron Hodge
  • The fairly spectacular secret origins of X-Factor
  • The Champions
  • The New Defenders
  • The evolution of Hank McCoy
  • X-Factor #1
  • The death throes of Scott and Madelyne’s marriage
  • Rusty Collins
  • A really bad first date
  • The increasingly dubious life choices of Scott Summers
  • The worst job interview
  • Sushi-a-Go-Go
  • How not to have an intervention
  • X-Factor
  • The X-Terminators
  • The Phoenix Force on Earth-811 (and its relationship to Rachel Summers)

NEXT WEEK: The Beyonder ruins everything. Again.

You can find a companion index to the material mentioned in this episode on our blog!

Find us on iTunes or Stitcher!

Rachel and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!