Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

Tag: professor x

As Mentioned in Episode 519 – Beautiful People With Incredible Powers

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Illustration by David Wynne
And so it begins. (New X-Men #114)
That is a damn stylish credits page. (New X-Men #114)
Cerebra. (New X-Men #114)
Well, fuck. (New X-Men #114)
Charles Xavier vs. Cassandra Nova, round 2 (although you won’t officially find that out ’til later). (New X-Men #114)
These covers! (New X-Men #115)
I really like the way Morrison writes these two. (New X-Men #115)
Alas, Ugly John, we hardly knew ye. (New X-Men #115)
She’s so evil, but also so fucking weird. (New X-Men #115)
The original Negasonic Teenage Warhead. (New X-Men #115)
So, that happened. (New X-Men #115)
It may be improbable, but I legitimately like the negative-space X as a statement. (New X-Men #116)
The return of Emma Frost. (New X-Men #116)
One of the most lingering images of the run. (New X-Men #116)
Oh. That’s bad. (New X-Men #116)
That’s not Charles Xavier. (New X-Men #116)
NEXT EPISODE: Beast has a bad day.

 

519 – Beautiful People With Incredible Powers

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Illustration by David Wynne

In which we start the Morrison Run; Professor X gets his hands on Chekhov’s gun; Cassandra Nova raises X-villains to a new level of weird; and humanity is running on borrowed time.

X-PLAINED:

  • No-Girl
  • New X-Men #114-117
  • Grant Morrison and their approach to the X-Men
  • Superhero fashion
  • Cerebra
  • Beast’s new look
  • Ugly John
  • Interpersonal dynamics
  • Cassandra Nova (somewhat)
  • Donald Trask
  • Master Molds
  • Wild Sentinels
  • Emma Frost (more) (again)
  • Negasonic Teenage Warhead (the original)
  • The fall of Genosha
  • Secondary mutations
  • The most strapless bra of all time
  • The Black Bug Room
  • Summers problems
  • Official X-Men and the designation thereof
  • Wonder Man and mutants

NEXT EPISODE: Beast has a bad day

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As Mentioned in Episode 517 – Sliding Scale Ransom

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What If vol. 2 #9
Behold: a moppet! (What If vol. 2 #9)
Can you imagine how creepy he looks in the mask, just going about his business? (What If vol. 2 #9)
It also activates whenever there’s a really good sale at Safeway. (What If vol. 2 #9)
Namorita is a delight. (What If vol. 2 #9)
The All-Newer, All-Differenter X-Men! (What If vol. 2 #9)
What If vol. 2 #24
The giant werewolf body with Wolverine’s li’l head really never stops being funny. (What If vol. 2 #24)
Sure, why not? (What If vol. 2 #24)
Considering what you already pay for regular weapons, I don’t think silver bullets are actually gonna be that much of a change. (What If vol. 2 #24)
Frank Punisher, Vampire Hunter! (What If vol. 2 #24)
This dork. (What If vol. 2 #24)
What If: Magik #1
Aw, they’re both so bad at being people. (What If: Magik #1)
Now, THAT is what I call a montage. (What If: Magik #1)
I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING (What If: Magik #1)
I want a whole ongoing set in this timeline. (What If: Magik #1)
NEXT EPISODE: Unspooling the X-Gene, with Dr. Jey McCreight!

LINKS & FURTHER HORRORS

517 – Sliding Scale Ransom

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In which we totally forgot to record a cold open (sorry); a lot of characters die (but not in Earth-616); Vampires may already be in command of America’s atomic arsenal; and we revisit a favorite.

X-PLAINED:

  • What If vol. 2 #9
  • What If vol. 2 #24
  • What If: Magik #1
  • Rahne Sinclair (moppet stage)
  • The deaths of the Silver Age and All-New-All-Different X-Men
  • Fancy television
  • Sliding-scale ransom
  • Then Ani-Men, somewhat
  • The Living LASER, somewhat
  • An orgy of satiation
  • Wolverine, Lord of the Vampires
  • Several highlights of Tarot: Witch of the Black Rose
  • Vampire nonsense
  • The Darkhold
  • The Montessi Formula
  • Some alligators
  • August 5
  • Frank Punisher, Vampire Hunter
  • What If vol. 2 #37 (briefly)
  • A kinder alternate history
  • A singularly beautiful montage
  • The Soul Staff
  • Summers family connections
  • How Wolverine climbs

NEXT EPISODE: Unspooling the X-Gene, with Dr. Jey McCreight!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

 

As Mentioned in Episode 514 – Plan 9 From Westchester

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Fun in the sewers! (X-Men #112)
Amelia Voght, fancy version. (X-Men #112)
Saint Sebastian got nothin’ on Charles Xavier. (X-Men #112)
Those rare moments when masks make sense! (X-Men #112)
Heh. (X-Men #112)
He gets things done. (X-Men #112)
Northstar X-Plains Eve of Destruction. (X-Men #112)
Poor Frenzy. (Uncanny X-Men #393)
This panel was a mistake. (Uncanny X-Men #393)
The Age of Apocalypse X-Babies. (Uncanny X-Men #393)
DAMNIT, WOLVERINE. (Uncanny X-Men #393)
Whoops. (Uncanny X-Men #393)
When in doubt, yeet your problems into space. (X-Men #113)
Wolverine has been trying for this moment for how long now? (X-Men #113)
Me, too, thanks. (X-Men #113)
NEXT EPISODE: Wolverine’s secret and oft-retconned origins!

LINKS & FURTHER READING:

If you’re interested in getting involved in community activism, here are some good places to start:

514 – Plan 9 From Westchester

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In which we provide some inroads to resisting fascism in your community; pacifism has amazing abs; Cyclops and Wolverine play revolutionary chicken; Amelia Voght fails to live up to her narrative potential; Jean Grey continues to make spectacularly bad choices; Polaris deserves better; and Wolverine finally gets to stab Magneto.

X-PLAINED:

  • Community action and aid
  • X-Men #112-113
  • Uncanny X-Men #393
  • Genosha (more) (again)
  • Northstar (more) (again)
  • Dazzler (more) (again)
  • Sunpyre (more) (again)
  • Hector Rendoza (more) (again)
  • Paulie Provenzano (more) (again)
  • Frenzy (more) (again)
  • Amelia Voght (more) (again)
  • St. Sebastian thirst traps
  • Sewer adventures
  • Post-Apocalypse Cyclops (more) (again)
  • Awkward conversations about feelings
  • Implausible knitting
  • The Age of Apocalypse X-Babies
  • A protracted confrontation
  • Bad strategy
  • A confusing ruse
  • Some stabbing
  • What happens to the unlikeliest X-Men
  • Jean Grey as Charles Xavier’s heir
  • Best potential uses of Hector Rendoza

NEXT EPISODE: The secret (retconned) origin of Wolverine!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 508 – Destiny’s Doodles

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A quick workout with Charles Xavier. (Uncanny X-Men #389)
At my funeral, I want a kazoo band. (Uncanny X-Men #389)
Joe Mactaggert is a jerk. (Uncanny X-Men #389)
Rachel’s actually okay, but Kitty doesn’t know that yet. (Uncanny X-Men #389)
DAMNIT. (Uncanny X-Men #389)
I wonder how weird and specific Destiny’s diaries get. (Uncanny X-Men #389)
Bad times. (Uncanny X-Men #389)
Is this a bit? (X-Men #109)
They’re gonna hook up, and then everyone’s going to forget that Thunderthird ever existed. Poor guy. (X-Men #109)
Ye Olde Hot Chocolate Hall. (X-Men #109)
Seriously, though, what the hell? (X-Men #109)
Oh, my. (X-Men #109)
I love that instead of making the holy family generally mutant-looking, they straight-up used X-Men statues. (X-Men #109)
Coming soon: X-Treme X-Men! (X-Men #109)
Based on size, maybe it’s a box of tissues? (X-Men #109)
Wellp. (X-Men #109)
BEHOLD YOUR LEGACY (X-Men #109)
NEXT EPISODE: Colossus dies!

508 – Destiny’s Doodles

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In which Professor Xavier is a jock; all of Shadowcat’s friends are dead; Storm recruits a team; Bishop makes new pals; and everyone gets festive.

X-PLAINED:

  • Some of Mystique’s secret kids
  • Uncanny X-Men #389
  • X-Men #109
  • Charles Xavier’s workout routine
  • Two funerals
  • Rave (the drug)
  • The wrong necklace
  • Destiny’s doodles
  • A large knife
  • Charles Xavier/Moira MacTaggert backstory
  • A snowball fight
  • A very sketchy circus
  • A break-up
  • “Christmas cheer”
  • A mysterious package
  • An X-Men nativity
  • Sage (Tessa)
  • Origins of X-Treme X-Men
  • Several gifts, some more mysterious than others
  • Charles Xavier’s legacy
  • Warwolves (more) (again)
  • Archangel’s color vision

NEXT EPISODE: Colossus dies!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog.

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!

As Mentioned in Episode 503 – Dream’s Anticlimax

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No, seriously. (Uncanny X-Men #388)
Ouch. (Uncanny X-Men #388)
A nonspecific explosion. (Uncanny X-Men #388)
So large. (Cable #87)
no but seriously how (Cable #87)
Bye, Post. (Cable #87)
One of his teammates has to draw the tattoo on every morning with a sharpie. (Bishop: The Last X-Man #16)
Every time they watch a movie, Wolverine carefully explains to his teammates that it’s not real. (Bishop: The Last X-Man #16)
Mother of the year. (Bishop: The Last X-Man #16)
Now kiss! (X-Men #108)
This is not subtext, although it may be an anagram of subtext. (X-Men #108)
NEXT EPISODE: SKA!

503 – Dream’s Anticlimax

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In which history repeats itself; Senator Kelly prevaricates (and then dies); Magneto keeps the cape on; Mystique does evil science; Post remains irrelevant (and then dies); Pyro saves the day (and then dies); Cable is a large man; Moira MacTaggert does the astral nasty (and then dies); and we really, really, really want to go to Froggy World.

X-PLAINED:

  • Moira MacTaggert’s mutation
  • A dubious plan
  • Evidence that we are in the wrong universe
  • Other crossovers named “Dream’s End”
  • A significant disclaimer
  • Uncanny X-Men #388
  • Cable #87
  • Bishop: The Last X-Men #16
  • X-Men #108
  • A surprise presidential platform
  • Sir Gordon Phillips and his guests
  • The new Brotherhood of Mutants
  • Cable’s hair
  • A lot of movie allusions
  • An ambiguous explosion
  • A deeply pointless retcon
  • An illusion
  • Cable’s psimitar
  • Pyro’s last stand
  • Dickalogue
  • Astral sex
  • The (apparent) death of Moira MacTaggert
  • A weird bonding moment in a cemetery
  • How to identify a time traveler
  • The (actual) death of Senator Robert Kelly
  • Mutant-free parts of the Marvel Universe
  • Froggy World

NEXT EPISODE: Generation X!

Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog!

Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!

Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy rad swag at our Dashery shop!