Blog Posts – Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

As Mentioned in Episode 372 – Monty Python’s Life of Magnus

May 15, 2022 Miles One comment

Listen to the podcast here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Steven Tyler vs Mick Jagger? (Magneto #1)

Home security has come a long way since 1996. (Magneto #1)

Sometimes the art crosses the line from iffy to weirdly awesome. (Magneto #1)

The sparkles are a nice touch, Fabian. (Magneto #1)

He’s the messiah! (Magneto #1)

Where… where’d your hair go, man? (Magneto #1)

“Behold my logo font!” (Magneto #2)

Fabian, what did that bird ever do to you?! (Magneto #2)

Meanwhile, in the space-opera version of this story… (Magneto #2)

Kelley Jones really nails the moments of Joseph’s Magneto-facade slipping. (Magneto #2)

PLOP (Magneto #2)

I mean, those birds have ample reason to have misgivings themselves. Fabian Cortez could be anywhere! (Magneto #2)

This was pre-Lyft, see. (Magneto #2)

…magnetism..? (Magneto #3)

So say we all. (Magneto #3)

If Fabian Cortez had a mustache, he’d be twirling it right now. (Magneto #3)

AAAAAAAHHHHHHH (Magneto #3)

Only the real Magneto could maniacally cackle at an angle that dramatic! (Magneto #4)

Because it’s about time someone did. (Magneto #4)

Broadcast Standards & Practices salutes you, Joseph. (Magneto #4)

“…for twenty-three days or so…” (Magneto #4)

NEXT TIME: Mystique vs. politicians-being-alive, round 2. Sorta.

As Mentioned in Episode 371 – Beware of Psychodrama

May 8, 2022 Miles Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Before settling on paint and canvas, Piotr Rasputin’s first medium was the thought balloon. (Excalibur #104)

Douglock tries. (Excalibur #104)

Moira, I know a lot of us have been working from home for a while now, but you may have overdone the whole home-office thing just a tad. (Excalibur #104)

Douglock is so much less mean than Mystique usually is when angrily shapeshifting! (Excalibur #104)

LOOK SHE’S IN THE SHADOWS SHE COULD BE ANYONE OKAY (Excalibur #104)

Also, Dani never did that back in the day. (Excalibur #104)

Oh, Kitty. (Excalibur #104)

Pretty sure this cover was printed on black velvet. (Excalibur #105)

Bryan Hitch may be the first artist to make Wildside look genuinely intimidating. (Excalibur #105)

Kitty, those aren’t image inducers, they’re jackets, and you’re wearing one too. (Excalibur #105)

Sound effect as narrative tool. (Excalibur #105)

Kitty gave an emotional and heartfelt speech without using the N-word! (Excalibur #105)

Piotr Rasputin is the firestarter. Twisted firestarter. (Excalibur #106)

But seriously, this is one of the most visually engaging pages of backstory I’ve ever read. (Excalibur #106)

Meggan Puceanu, Actual Elf. (Excalibur #106)

Hey, it’s Frenzy! We love Frenzy! (Excalibur #106)

Jay is not okay with your thought-bubble-versus-computer-display redundancy, Moira. (Excalibur #106)

Excalibur, the comic where everyone is sexy all the time. (Excalibur #106)

Piotr, I think you put your pants on the wrong… you know what, you go, Russian cowboy. Now where did I put those singles… (Excalibur #106)

Metaphor by way of landmine. (Excalibur #106)

“And we’re going to ride bikes with Magneto and he’s going to take us to France!” (Excalibur #106)

NEXT TIME: No one rides bikes.

LINKS & FURTHER MISADVENTURES

We allude frequently to Warlock piloting around Doug’s corpse, which story we covered in Episode 91 – The Saddest Story Ever Told.

As Mentioned in Episode 370 – The Sound of Evil

April 24, 2022 Miles One comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

So sad… but so colorful! (Uncanny X-Men #46)
(M – Jean’s yellow plaid garment is what we fashionistas call a “coat.” -J)

There’s a reason the Juggernaut’s armor makes him look kinda like a mushroom. (Uncanny X-Men #46)

Angel’s normally better than his teammates at dodging, but he’s weighed down by his fashion choices. Well, Jean’s, I guess. She made his costume. Possibly out of spite. (Uncanny X-Men #46)

JEAN GREY YOU ARE BETTER THAN THIS (Uncanny X-Men #46)

That’s more like it! (Continuity aside.) (Uncanny X-Men #46)

Cheer up, kids. You’ll be back together in just a few issues. (Uncanny X-Men #46)

This is pretty much how Drag Race works, right? (Uncanny X-Men #52)

Shortest cold open ever. (Uncanny X-Men #52)

“Scott, you wore that out? I just made that for you for Bedroom Time! (Uncanny X-Men #52)

I appreciate how very 60s this pair of panels is. (Uncanny X-Men #52)

More 60s! (Uncanny X-Men #52)

It’s… it’s way more complicated than that, Lorna. (Uncanny X-Men #52)

Now that is how you start an issue! (Uncanny X-Men #60)

SCOTT SUMMERS YOU ARE BETTER THAN THIS (Uncanny X-Men #60)

I wish we got to see more of Jean and Lorna as buds. (Uncanny X-Men #60)

We didn’t talk about this in the episode, but I love the story the Brotherhood’s body language is telling in the foreground. (Uncanny X-Men #60)

Miles’s favorite two-page spread. (Uncanny X-Men #60)

How can something so ridiculous be so genuinely tense? (Uncanny X-Men #60)

Aww Jager (Uncanny X-Men #60)

Name a better origin story – we dare you. (Uncanny X-Men #60)

Well, it beats the costume with the suspenders. (Uncanny X-Men #60)

NEXT TIME: Kitty makes some choices.

LINKS & FURTHER READING:

Join us in donating to Equality Florida!
More from Max Carleton:

As Mentioned in Episode 369 – Carly Askani

April 17, 2022 Miles Leave a comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

“This ought to give you” *POW* “a new perspective” *BIFF* “on things, Alex!” (Uncanny X-Men #339)

Head trauma for Lucas BIshop! (Uncanny X-Men #339)

I mean, she’s not wrong. (Uncanny X-Men #339)

“You think I just fell off the turnip truck, McCoy? No one pulls a fast one on J. Jonah Jameson!” (Uncanny X-Men #339)

“I’m Ororo Munroe, and I’m here to x-plain the X-Men… because it’s about time someone did.” (Uncanny X-Men #339)

Never trust a Summers when he tells you he’s fine. (Uncanny X-Men #339)

Well, if they can print it, I guess we can post it. (X-Men #59)

Head trauma for Lucas Bishop! Again! (X-Men #59)

Hell of a Wolverine you’ve got there, Mr. Kubert. (X-Men #59)

JOSEPH I AM CALLING THE POLICE (X-Men #59)

Not quite as good as the Rogue/Gambit kiss from #41, but still… whoa. (X-Men #59)

I’M HUGE (X-Men #59)

“For instance, I can see through this utterly massive chin.” (Wolverine Annual 1996)

Josef Stalin..? (Wolverine Annual 1996)

Up… (Wolverine Annual 1996)

…and up… (Wolverine Annual 1996)

…and up. (Wolverine Annual 1996)

“General Grievious, sir, it’s the Jedi!” (Wolverine Annual 1996)

You know, I think this might be Sunfire’s best non-Age of Apocalypse look! (Wolverine Annual 1996)

*Pacific Rim music plays* (and now it’s in your head too) (Wolverine Annual 1996)

Logan, that… that was there before. Maybe you need to adjust your bandana. (Wolverine Annual 1996)

NEXT TIME: The Silver Age with Max Carleton!

LINKS AND FURTHER READING

As Mentioned in Episode 368 – Six Teenagers in a Van

April 13, 2022 Miles One comment

Listen to the episode here.

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line!

Fourth wall comes tumbling down (Generation X #22)

In which Chris Bachalo is at his most Chris Bachalo. (Generation X #22)

FTHOOM (Generation X #22)

Every day is a good hair (and cloak) day when you’re Nightmare. (Generation X #22)

The B-plot, as told by the bottom of each page. (Generation X #22)

Hey, look! It’s the plot of the upcoming Gen X #25! Maybe! (Generation X #22)

Paige goes body horror as Jono goes… to the set of a music video, maybe? (Generation X Annual 1996)

Sean is not even supposed to be here. (Generation X Annual 1996)

Goatee guy! (Generation X Annual 1996)

Late lady! (Generation X Annual 1996)

Execrable executive! (Generation X Annual 1996)

I was in INTERPOL, dammit! INTERPOL! (Generation X Annual 1996)

Richard Starkings (and Comicraft)! (Generation X Annual 1996)

This guy. (Generation X Annual 1996)

Synch’s hands are siblings. (Generation X Annual 1996)

Everything works out! (Generation X Annual 1996)

NEXT TIME: The X-Men go undercover.

Help Us Support Queer and Trans Youth!

April 1, 2022 Jay 2 comments

On Monday, March 28, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis signed HB1557–the notorious “don’t say gay” bill–into law. This bill is part of an unprecedented wave of legislation targeting queer and trans youth, with potentially deadly consequences.

Florida may be America’s favorite trash fire, but we’re not willing to give up on our home state; and we’re DEFINITELY not willing to give up on the queer and trans kids who live there.

So we’re fighting back.

All April, we’ll be raising money for Equality Florida. Between our own contributions and the generous support of anonymous donors, we’re in a position to match up to $6000 of your contributions AND offer some very cool prizes.

HERE’S WHAT WE NEED YOU TO DO:

Make a donation to Equality Florida and email the receipt to [email protected] with the subject line EQUALITY or tweet it to @xplainthexmen.

AND HERE’S WHAT YOU’LL GET:

IF YOU DONATE UNDER $25 – You’ll have our eternal love and gratitude, as well as the warm, fuzzy feeling of making a difference.
IF YOU DONATE $25 OR MORE – We’ll thank you on the podcast. (Note: these’ll be straightforward thanks, not the silly kind we do for patrons.)
IF YOU DONATE $50 OR MORE – Miles, who is adamantly Not an Artist, will draw you an earnest and possibly terrible social media X-avatar.
IF YOU DONATE $100 OR MORE – We’ll record a custom voicemail greeting for you.
IF YOU DONATE $200 OR MORE – Jay will knit you a hat.
IF YOU DONATE $500 OR MORE – We’ll record a Hawk Talk on a subject of your choice.

Thank you, so much, for fighting with us. <3

-J&M