Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

As Mentioned in Episode 14 – Look Upon My Man-Thing and D’Spayre

Listen to the podcast here!

Links and Further Reading:


The Death-Defying Doctor Mirage

Savage Wolverine #21

All Those Signature Moves We Listed Off (We’ll Do a Visual Directory Eventually, We Promise):


  • Fastball Special: Colossus throws Wolveine at something.
  • Phaseball Special*: Someone throws Kitty through robots


  • The Most Comics-Code-Adherent at What He Does*:  The thing where Wolverine has his claws out during a fight but doesn’t cut anyone.
  • Cue-ball Special*: The thing where Cyclops takes out like six bad guys with ricochets from one optic blast.
  • Slippery Slope*: The thing where Iceman tries to be awesome and ends up beating up his teammates by accident.
  • Blue-Plate Special Special*: The thing where an X-man uses their powers to prepare lunch.
  • The thing where Kitty wrecks everything by accident phasing through it.
  • The thing where everyone switches opponents mid-fight, and that’s what turns the tide.
  • The thing where Nightcrawler is awfully dashing about beating people up.
  • The thing where Storm’s claustrophobia saves the day.
  • The thing where Angel just dodges shit for like an hour instead of participating in the fight.
  • The thing where Xavier fakes his own death.
  • The thing where Cypher and/or Kitty and/or Illyana and/or Wolverine do the “Ain’t I a stinker?” thing from the control booth of the Danger Room.
  • The thing where Cyclops uses his optic blasts to slow or stop inertia or a fall.
  • The thing where Storm has no powers and STILL kicks someone’s ass into next week.
  • The thing where Colossus and Wolverine throw themselves at Magneto every goddamn time despite being made of metal.

*We made these names up. They are not official canon, but we live in hope.


  1. I have a minor correction to your podcast. You mentioned that the Dr. Doom/Arcade story was set in Latveria, which I assumed too for a long time because it’s Dr. Doom and he’s in a castle, but I reread the issue recently and I was surprised to see that Doom’s castle in that story is actually in the Adironacks.

  2. Hello I have a few questions for my new favorite comic book podcast.
    1.Can I introduce in your headcannon the possibility that Reagan Wynngarde usually wears yoga pants and an old sweater and uses her powers to convince people that she is wearing what her uniform is?
    2.I know we are coming up on the issue in question, could we get a pic of Rachel doing the famous Kitty Pryde point (she already believes he is a jerk).
    3.I know you guys aren’t big on the Avengers but I have noticed that they are never discriminated against even when they are Beast, Scarlet Witch or Quicksilver. I particularly remember the korvac saga and the scene where Beast was mobbed by women like he was a member of a boy band. Even when Gyrich showed up he didn’t treat Beast any different from the other Avengers.

  3. This episode was such a perfect foil for the Dark Phoenix episode. I ended up spending the last 10 minutes of my commute sitting in the parking garage at work cackling at Man-Thing jokes.

    1. Given all the Man-Thing jokes in this episode, I can’t wait until you get to the Excalibur issue where Galactus is drawn standing behind the lighthouse in the most outrageously Freudian way possible. (I think it was #25).

    2. There are so many comics/movies/TV shows that get academia all wrong- so I absolutely love the way that Havok and Polaris are portrayed in this arc. There’s a sort of resigned, passive-aggressive despair that captures the reality of being in a PhD program totally perfectly. I would read the hell out of a miniseries about Havok and Polaris trying to finish grad school.

  4. Suggestions for Signature Move nicknames:

    -The thing where Xavier fakes his own death: Tuesday.

    -The thing where everyone switches opponents mid-fight, and that’s what turns the tide: Kansas City Shuffle.

    -The thing where Angel just dodges shit for like an hour instead of participating in the fight: His One Job.

    -The thing where Cyclops uses his optic blasts to slow or stop inertia or a fall: Flyclops 1.0 (if you don’t know about Flyclops, I recommend looking the concept up – it’s basically all about Cyclops using his Optic Blasts to fly)

    -The thing where Colossus and Wolverine throw themselves at Magneto every goddamn time despite being made of metal: Memory of a Goldfish Attack

    -The thing where Storm’s claustrophobia saves the day: Deus Ex Claustrophobia.

    -“The thing where Storm has no powers and STILL kicks someone’s ass into next week” needs no name. That’s just Storm being Storm.

  5. What about the Chris Claremont Special? Where a Danger Room cold opening is used to introduce the powers and personality of each character and recap the last couple issues.

    Or the variation where a cold opening featuring a single character getting walloped in a fight is only later revealed to be a Danger Room sequence?

  6. Canadian Wendigo Law was thrown out last year by the Supreme Court under the Charter of Rights and is currently in limbo.

    But not in Limbo. They have their own laws.

  7. There’s one X-Move you might have missed. The “flying gun” in which Angel and Cyclops hold hands while flying through the air and blasting Sentinels.

  8. I never really noticed how monsteriffic things get there for a while, with the Wendigo, Christmas demon, D’Spayre and Man-Thing all showing up in quick succession.

    I always thought Storm was just uncomfortable with Stevie’s hinting that the two of them should get an apartment somewhere and raise Kitty together. This was before Yukio helped Storm fully accept herself, after all.

    Speaking of Storm, now that Cockrum’s back, can we talk about how the way he draws her eyes sometimes makes me really uncomfortable? It’s like he’s trying to make her incomparably exotic and it just ends up pushing my uncanny valley buttons. I’ve always thought it must have something to do with the fact that he originally designed her as being half cat.

  9. Wolverine and Colossus hurling themselves at Magneto every time is obviously the Learning Curve-ball Special.

  10. I think it’s so sad that most of the supporting characters Claremont brought in are either dead (the Greys, Candy Southern, Tom Corsi, Sharon Friedlander, Moira MacTaggert, Madelyne Pryor, Lilandra, for a time Doug Ramsey, and more I’m sure) or forgotten (Stevie Hunter, Lee Forrester, Jimaine Szardos, Colleen Wing, Misty Knight). Comics in general have forsaken a lot of supporting casts, I sincerely miss it for the X-Men.

    1. At least Misty Knight got her own Heroes for Hire series a few years back. A few of them, in fact, if I’m remembering correctly.

      I guess it’s just the cylical nature of comics, though. When you bring in new characters, sometimes older ones have to go into the toybox. It’s just plain unfortunate that so many authors decide to break the toys when they feel they’re done with them rather than put them away nicely so someone else can use them without buying the toy anew or slapping retcons all over it.
      I give a pass on Jean, as Claremont both killed her off and brought her back (after trying to use Jean’s sister instead), and you also have guys who bring back the broken toys in creative and inventive ways – like Brubaker bringing back Bucky, to use a non-eXample.

      And sometimes, a toy breaking is a wonderful event. Like Barry Allen’s death in Crisis on Infinite Earths. Or it can be moving, like Gwen Stacy’s death. So it’s not like I’m against character death either.

      I suppose it’s more of a balance thing than anything else, but the glut of short-sighted toy breakage has really given us one hell of a jaded view toward comic book death.
      It honestly would not shock me if the Grey family was somehow brought back during the All-New X-Men run, for example.

  11. Enjoying the podcast! You remind me of what I used to love about the x-men. Totally agree with all the comments you have on the Claremont/Byne era. But in the latest, you mention how Byrne got sick of Claremont messing with the intent of his artwork- where did that info come from?

    Also need a link to the 70’s Marvel documentary you mentioned a few episodes back?

    1. As a rule, you can find links–including that one–in the “as mentioned” post for the relevant episode.

  12. Oh, and this goes back an episode or two, but you discussed Scott and Corsair hugging? I think you forgot issue 167(going off memory here so I apologize) when the x-men and New Mutants were on corsair’s ship cloning Prof X a new body to save him from the Brood infection, Corsair asks if he could “give your old man a hug?” and they hug.

  13. WRT “The thing where everyone switches opponents mid-fight, and that’s what turns the tide,” I’ll bow to Gail Simone on this one; she she had the JLA (who do that even more than the X-Folks) call it the “Fox Defense,” in honor of Gardner Fox.

  14. After listening to this episode, all I want to say is: I love y’all. The Man-Thing jokes solidified my love for you and this podcast. (Does that mean your Man-Thing jokes made me hard?)

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